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Posts by hydromorphone
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2017-09-05 at 4:55 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by mashlehash Well I will not be telling you happy birthday, because I don't know who the fuck you are, and I don't know you the way that I know LSD.
I might say happy birthday but that's only if you treat me the right way, and you haven't been treating me the right way, and it's really affecting my emotions lately
Happy un-birthday, Mash. -
2017-09-05 at 4:08 AM UTC in What makes people so impatient [to die]pain.
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2017-09-05 at 3:53 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSI'm going to shoot myself in the head in about 30minutes to a hour from now. Anyone who cares to watch, I guess I'll stop by tinybltc an if anyone's there, I'll cam up right before I do it. You guys have offered me a lot of entertainment over the years, so I guess the least I can do is try to return the favor. I'm sure I'll make quite a few of you happy in the process too.
I appreciate a lot of you for being kind and helpful through the madness that is my life, especially Malice. -
2017-09-04 at 1:58 PM UTC in Life's too short to be angry.Anger is a truly worthless emotion. It's the one easiest for people to cling to, and hardest to let go. Anger causes pain for both parties. It's a shame love is such an underrated emotion by so many. Really sad so many people don't know how to love or even what it is.
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2017-09-04 at 1:52 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSHey PoC, Just thought you'd like to relish in the fact because of all the shit I didn't order on Friday like I kept telling myself I had to. Couldn't remember why, and with all the stress and anxiety, I didn't. Just figured out why now: Labor Day. The PO is closed too, how I remembered. So pat yourself on the back for that one.
I still hope things work out for you. Sorry you thought I tried to use, manipulate or ever hurt you. SHould show you I aint making up my memory loss. Ordering medicine isn't something I'd forget to do on purpose, but hye, I want to be like this, right?
I did try to tell you last night I was sorry and took blame for what happened, but you know... for all the times you blamed how badly you treated me on your mental shit, that was the one and only time I ever blamed something I did (or lack thereof) because well... do a little research on epilepsy. I know damn well what's happening isn't panic attacks, I've dealt and still deal with those fairly regular. Panic attacks usually don't cause the person to convulse and/or fall out causing them huge bruises and contusions on their head, face and other parts of their body. It has certainly contributed to the physical pain beyond the contraction of muscles from going out all the time- its why I didn't want to get up to answer the phone. I had to re-read the conversation just to remember what you'd said and what I'd said from the point after I'd told you not to keep calling back.
I love you, for whatever that's worth.
I didn't ask to be like this, and I certainly didn't want to be anybodies victim. If I just laid there, and gave up like most people would have, then I'd probably have been believed, but because I tried a good deal to fight through it, well, of course I should be fine... just like you, you without any physical ailments, and with just your mental shit you say you can't work. I never truly wanted to lay down and die... as bad as shit got, as sick as I got, yeah, a good deal I wanted to die. I wanted to roll over and die, and be weak, but I wasn't. I still somehow made it, made it for my son, made it for you, and kept trying... but it really is all too much and how it kills me to be riddled like I am with all this shit tearing at my flesh and mind.
If you wonder how I stood with Tye, then why don't you ask him. I loved you, Joe. Sorry you werent the only person I loved, but I loved you only shy of my son in a way I never had before, in a way I never thought I could. Sorry I failed to show you that. I truly am. I truly am sorry the shit wrong with me defeated me yet again. I tried at least, and well, it was sweet while it lasted.
I love you. Sorry for it all -
2017-09-02 at 3:24 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by mashlehash Don't you love that she has a smile on her face? Hah
HTS has a much prettier smile than PC. HTS is also more attractive as a woman in almost every way than PC is. The only thing PC has going for her is a fully functional vagina(at least I think it is). if I were a man, I'd choose to fuck HTS over PC any day of the week. -
2017-09-02 at 3:17 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by mmQ Why in the shit did you do any of that. I skim your posts usually trying to get the gist of them, but I really don't know about you and Crack's relationship or how long you've been talking, etc. What I've gathered and may have wrong, is that you have talked to him for a long time maybe at least a few years, and just recently took a different fancy to him, and he to you, what with you traveling to him. Was that meant to be a relationship or was it meant to just be a visit?
I don't think all men are shit. I think a lot of people are shit, and from my experience, at least from what I've seen, most woman do end up being the bigger cunt in the scenario more often than not. Could also be I've had more male friends over the years than females, so I got to see their side of it more than say a female friend going through similar.
Piles, from what relatively little of his I've read since I joined zoklet, has always been self-admittedly a defeatist and a heavily depressed and more or less worthless individual. Ha. I'm not saying he is, I'm just saying he's kind of always had that attitude I think though he's had spurts of good times and better spirits, he's actually kind of similar to me in that regard. But, my point is when someone claims that about himself, and given your history, it should raise an immediate large orange fuzzy flag at full mast that stays erect forever. This flag reminds you that no matter how sincere, how sweet, how genuine a person might sound… unless you've seen a noticeable change in them over a period of at least 6 months, they are probably filling you full of shit.
I mean you clearly see that now, expressing it in your posts about 'how you should have known.' I think it's apparent to me that you have a good heart and well, likely really want a partner to share it with.. I could be wrong. But you've chosen for whatever reason to get involved with a few people from this community and both have been the complete opposite experiences of what you had hoped for. You want to be that perfect girlfriend? maybe? Being there, giving gifts, stuff like that, and you can do that, and all you need to do is not fux with depressed alcoholics and haphazard lifestyle drug users.
Meh this kind of just sounds like generic advice. I was about to tell you to be patient, the right man will come along. Haha. But I mean, I guess that sometimes ends up being true. Anyway I'm sure you know what I mean. Just don't become one of the cringe-girls that have some bad relationships and need to bring up how 'all men suck' as often as possible. I don't think you're that type anyway. Most of us are shitheads but you can usually spot it out, and then all you have to do is not convince yourself that you can make it work, or that you can fix us. You can't fix someone. Except me. Send me $1000 and a cake and you'll have cured my depression.
I am curious what was running through your mind when you thought a)giving poc $500 is a good idea and b)when you decided that it needed to be $500 instead of a normal birthday gift like $50 or maybe $100?
Gracias you.
I knew PoC since I was 16. I actually politely declined a long distance relationship with him all those years ago. We lost contact for a good period of time, from when he called 911 on me when I overdosed on my scripts in a suicide attempt, and after a few years I got back in touch with him and we've been friends up until recently when after a suicide attempt on his part, I guess it worked out for us to work toward a relationship and try to help each other out of our holes we've gotten ourselves in. Our mental illness's are very similar, and we do think alike, had a lot of similar interests, and desires for the future. I think the biggest issue PoC didn't understand about me though is how my head gets when my epilepsy gets bad off. It's funny though, he should have at least to some degree, being he gets sensory sensitivity, which is pretty much like how I get when it's bad- guess I didn't "explain" it right though. Another difference is he was far more unable to understand or empathize with people. He'd get in his ways and it didn't matter if he promised, said he would or you begged, he'd not be there, but like the other day... he needed a full debriefing to "approve" my leave for why I couldn't talk to him right then. It's not always possible for me to think clearly much less be able to articulate what is wrong or what's going on with me- I mistakenly thought he knew that about epilepsy and my issues going on there.
I never wanted to be in a relationship in the first place, never sought anything out like that, but during his suicidal period he was talking to me, I was trying to convince him not to do it, that he hadn't given life a fair shake, etc. and needed to get away from his mother who really is a huge negative force in his life. He'd mentioned at one time wanting to be with me, but not thinking it possible, especially after I had my son, so I suggested, at Malice's urging to give that a chance together- while he was in the hospital he had his mom give me his # and while talking to him, that's where it led.
I drove to see him for his birthday and stayed 3 days while visiting him. We'd both planned to move in together sometime in the near future. I ddnt give him $500, I gave him two gifts equal to about $500. (forgot too.. the amp for the guitar... there was another 80$) along with some other odds and ends including the phenibut I had left which was a good 20-25grams and some other little things I thought he might find useful (128gb SD card for his new phone and an OTG cable- which yeah... they're incredibly useful IMO before I broke my S5 I used mine all the time for all sorts of fun stuff- another 40-50$ there). I just tried to do nice things for him, and give him nice gifts for his birthday. While I didn't pay for them our right I acquired them in some work I did a while back, and had really had them as backups to pawn if/when shit got tight and I needed $$, but I really wanted to do something nice for PoC and be able to share music with him as I'd gotten a good deal of enjoyment and anxiety relief out of learning to play (depsite him saying he wanted to learn, he never put 10minutes of effort into shit so yeah... it was a fucking waste... shit, I at least enjoyed playing the electric guitar). Not to mention, my T-PAIN was on demand to him while there, and I'd also mailed him between 1/2- and 1 gram of T-PAIN 3-4 times when I thought he could use it, when his anxiety and depression were really getting bad.
I just don't see, with what I gave for a birthday present, and all the times I sent the shit I literally require to live and function on a daily basis, how anyone could day I used him or cared more about the drug I am physically dependent on to function more than I did him. It's bullshit.
I don't want to be with anyone. I won't be every making that mistake again. This isn't about men or woman, relationships like this or simple friendships, I won't be making the mistake again.
Originally posted by 霍比特人说中文不好 I think I'm going to masturbate to hydro's misery and then cry afterwards because you guys dox'd me and my bottles.
Yeah, you would. You're that kind of sicko. How's your pretend life going? Great I suspect. Wish I could live a lie like you too. I envy you for that.
MASH- I appreciate your kindness but I wont be bothering you with a PM. My life is far too fucked and I'd rather not converse about it any longer. Take care, hope shit is going good for you. You're a special kinda person, just hope life doesn't crush that like it has done with me. -
2017-09-01 at 6:32 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSOh... I didn't even mention. I'd given PoC approx. 500$ birthday present, not even including all the little odds and ends, drove nearly 1k miles round trip to visit him on my dime, and probably would still have my job if not going for his birthday, so I wouldn't be in the situation of prostituting in the first place. Nevermind going too, knowing full well, I'd be in WDs for the trip home/getting home.
I got two lousy charms and a card. To my 5-6 letters I'd written him, at his request, and also promise for him to return the favor, which he never did.
So.. who used who here...
It also might have been a shitty cake, but I tried to bae him a homemade cake, coconut, as he requested for his birthday too. I put so much more stress on myself than I should have for such a shitty, awful human being. I should know better. I should know not to trust anyone, not to love anyone, because as always, despite their claims of wanting to help me, of understanding me, of being "there" for me, nope... it wont happen and I'll always get fucked in the end.
EDIT: also hilarious that I was accused of caring more about my medicine than anyone else, especially when I'd mailed him shit like 4 times to help him til he could make an order (gave himmy account details so he could use my discount) that he still, month after month never made despite saying he was going to. Yep.. I'm the shitty person in this situation though. IDC anymore. My heart has no love for anyone or anything at this point. He broke me good and hard this time.
Post last edited by hydromorphone at 2017-09-01T18:36:00.809623+00:00 -
2017-09-01 at 6:23 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by NARCassist did you just dox §m£ÂgØL a little bit?
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I truly didn't mean that, but since pretty much everyone has already come out with it anyway. Sorry for that too, §m£ÂgØL. At least it's a super common name.
As far as me needing to be "turned in" for my crimes, I've never committed any crimes, save unless you consider buying small quantities of drugs crimes. Nothing worse, and I know for fact far less than the bulk of the community has committed. I've never robbed anyone, stolen from anybody, or done anything to harm (we can go back and forth on the issue with the gun, §m£ÂgØL, and my ex- fact is, had I called the police and reported what had been done to me by them both up to that point, they'd both would have been arrested and had domestic abuse charges against them, and they'd bth been told to leave the property numerous times before it escalated to a firearm being brandished, to which §m£ÂgØL wasn't even in the same room as the firearm on the second occasion and never once had it leveled in his direction/at him (which is the god's honest truth). Had I just called the cops to get his drunk ass and beer off my property, he'd have been arrested for putting his hands around my neck- even if I'd have called after the fact of biting him, where the bite was made, it could have only been made with his arms around my neck/shoulders from behind and was clearly a defense wound. That would have been assault and battery for sure. I didn't want him, or anyone to deal with the police or go to jail though. I just wanted shit to end, to stop. I hindsight, I should have, and if ever a situation arises as did, again with anyone, I will. I learned my lesson there. §m£ÂgØL forgets that just because he was fucked up mentally on a analog psychedelic, that what he did to me when I was trying to help and protect him, had I reported it would have been assault and battery on a pregnant woman, from kicking me in the stomach, and forcing his fingers in my mouth. I don't think he had enough awareness though, or maturity, to own up to that, and somehow thinks because he was in an altered mental state that he should have a pass, or somehow that didn't harm me psychologically. It's whatever. It ended for the best as it did for being such a shitty situation. I've let go o any anger I may have had, glad he's gone, not harmed, not in jail/prison, and living his own life, and hopefully he can walk away with some lesson or something, as I have from the whole ordeal.)
Me posting anything about PoC is basically a warning. If you know or have dealings with him, be careful. He will betray any trust you place in him. He has zero honor, and deep down is just a selfish little boy who cries wolf. He gets off on having people worry about him, and causing them distress, then turns it around, manipulating the situation to make it look like everyone else is in the wrong for being worried like they were (i.e. saying he was going to kill himself several times after work, posting on here he was going to kill himself/wanting ideas/being erratic, then letting his phone die while he was havign a good time getting high at his friend's house knowing full well he left three people worried sick about him with no idea what was going on, if he was okay, if he did it finally or whatever... and acted like this was no big deal. If he didn't want to talk, that's fine, I didn't either, but just saying something like "I went to my friend's house to chill" would have relieved all three people of stress, anxiety and worry, which he was well aware he caused, and would cause, before, during, and after.)
PoC is a narcissist, just like his mother, just he takes a different role sometimes. He, just like her, always tries to play the victim, and use his mental illness (just as she does with her physical and role as a single "mom") as an excuse for his destructive, harmful, and vindictive behavior. HE got hurt by me not able to talk or deal with a conversation at that moment, despite me being the one who had been experiencing epileptic fits, and a terrible headache, and just saying for him to stop calling me (the noise was killing me and like a knife in my brain everytime my computer rang from Skype, or the house phone rang). I really wasn't thinking correctly, and anyone who knows anything about epilepsy should know that especially during/between seizures/and a long while after, you can't expect that person to be able to think clearly, or communicate normally. For quite a while now I have been expressing to him that I truly believe I've been hallucinating, and where it was bad nearly a year ago, got somewhat better, but recently has been worse and worse. Same goes for my memory, and there has been times before where there's been shit I definitely should have remembered, but really... I can't. I have amnesia with pieces of my life and specific conversations- POOF gone to the ether. I' still not all there from last night, and very sleep deprived. When I did finally fall asleep, I kept being woken from nightmares, one of which I woke the house up screaming in my sleep at about 4:30-5am or so. My head is still very spacy... it's like being high in the most anti-euphoric way imaginable. If I had to describe hell (which, I really can't even describe this even, what I am going through mentally), this would be it, and I've been stuck in it for a long time, since yesterday morning. I wish to fuck I wasn't this way and could have given PoC what he desired, the explanation he wanted from me, but I couldn't and still am struggling to explain. All I know is that I kept sayng not to call me back anymore, that I couldnt talk and hear his negativity at that point in time until the point and continued pressure I finally told him to leave me alone and have a nice life. WHich ensued more and more calls/messages, going on how he did "nothing wrong and deserved an explanation"... I couldn't explain before shit, so IDK what made him think now I could suddenly explain anything any better.
He claims he had to walk on egg shells with me, and then was "forced" to profusely apologize to me. I never expected that, never wanted that, and up until yesterday, there was never a single reason he should have apologized, or felt bad about anything he did, and I told him that several times. When I get like this, I just need to be alone for a while to deal with my seizures and my fucked up headspace. It wasn't his fault, or fuck even my fault- epilepsy is a brain disorder, it's fucking literally BRAIN DAMAGE, regardless of the cause (be it a tumor, head trauma, or whatever is causing it, it's still damage to the brain which causes epileptic seizures). I wasn't ever trying to be mean, or hurtful, not intentionally, though I can now ee how some of my responses from yesterday afternoon could come off as cold and being callous. He says he feels led on, well... i can tell you now, I certainly feel led on. My feelings for PoC never changed until last night, until I discovered what he'd done. I loved PoC, loved him with all my heart. I wanted a life with him, I wanted us both to work to help better ourselves, and build a life together we both would have been happy with. I meant every word I'd said about loving him, and how much he meant to me, and my desire to help him anyway I could. Well, last night he said he hadn't felt the same about me for sometime. Which is fine, but he shouldn't have got back with me, told me he just said that when he was mad at me and pretty much did everything manipulative to try and restore our relationship. I DID NOT ASK whatsoever to attempt at getting back together, he did. My feelings had never changed, and I still loved him as much as ever. I was the only one duped here. I was the only one led on to believe someone loved me as much as I loved them. I certainly never, ever tried to guilt him or make him feel bad, even about shit he did do that directly hurt me. I never asked for a dime of his, never wanted anything from him, and never willing took anything from him, save for these two charms he'd bought for me (which now are in the backyard somewhere, chain broken, scattered in the yard) and it certainly wasn't for lack of effort on his part. In the hospital, he tried to get me to take his card. A couple times he tried insisting. I didn't want his money, I didn't want to take advantage of him, or anyone for that matter. The only thing he did for me was lend me the money, to which I returned to him when I got paid. It was something like 2 or 3 days tops- a very quickly repaid loan is as much as I can be accused of "taking" from PoC.
He'd even lied to me and told me "I don't mind you prostituting, I only worry about your safety". Weel, I'd found a situation that pretty much covered my safety, but still then I got shit after that... if you do have issues with a spouse prostituting and they cme to talk to you about if prior to engaging in anything, then fucking speak up and say so, don't act like you got no problems with it, then re-neg on it once the deed is done. I felt awful for that. I loved him enough I would have sat in WDs for him, had he have asked me to, rather than making the money that way. I even said that at one point, trying to be clear about everything with him.
I'm sure most of you think I'm a fraud, that I'm a liar, that I make this shit up regarding my health or even my side of events. It's whatever. I know the diagnoses I have. Believe me or not, it really doesnt matter.
As for posting shit in a "public" forum, please recall, I never instigated anything negative about either PoC or §m£ÂgØL, that was all on them, I just responded and continue to do so when I feel fit to. Nobody here, save §m£ÂgØL, or PoC, and a handful of other members here, most of which already know more of the details about shit, know who I am or have my PI. To the majority of users here, I'm just an anonymous person posting with the same usermname I've used for years and years now.
What really prompted me to post anything is the fact PoC went through and held my account hostage for ordering my medicine. If you trust him, he will betray your trust and use manipulative tactics to abuse and use you to get what he wants. I was only ever in that situation of trust with him, because I'd tried to help him. I wouldn't have trusted him with the shit had I ever suspected he would go about and do the shit he did. My mistake, I just hope no one else makes the same mistake. PoC is a very misleading character. -
2017-09-01 at 6:04 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Captain Falcon This bitch gon turn on you again, she's fucking crazy
I didnt turn on anyone. I didn't do fucking shit to anyone. I didnt fuck up anyone's fucking life like he did, twice now, and this last time, in a serious, irreversible way. I loved that piece of shit until the moment I realized he would ever stoop to that vile, low as shit level my ex stooped to, but he went a bit further. The only thing I did to hurt him was want to be left alone while I seizured and dealt with my headache. That's the great wrong I did to PoC that somehow he thinks in his head was justification to hurt me back, to get revenge on me... wanting to be left alone. Clingy piece of autistic shit. He even threatened to come to my house and break down my door. No good deed goes unpunished as my father liked to say... well, it's the truth. PoC isnt mentally ill, he's fucking just a piece of shit. tere is no cure or pill that will fix that. -
2017-09-01 at 5:41 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSHey, §m£ÂgØL:
I want to apologize to you.
You're right about Joe. I shouldn't have jumped to defend such a piece of vile shit.
Just an FYI for everyone, he's a NARC. He got mad at me because I was fucked up with a headache, had been having seizures that morning, was seizury then and just couldnt deal with a conversation about the shit he wanted to discuss and was being very negative "fuck everything" shit. He wouldn't stop calling me back, finally until I said "have a nice life" then he kept going on, said a bunch of hurtful things, and just wouldnt leave me alone, until I blocked him which right before he said "block me stupid, and dont come crawling back to me" which I had no intention of ever doing, especially after him saying that- all I wanted initially was to be left alone to seizure and deal with the pain because he wasn't doing anything to amake it better and was only making it worse. Called my house over a dozen times, having the old man scream and scream from what I gathered between seizures until I fell asleep, got woke by his screaming again.. Then found out he changed my password and email account for where I get my medicine from. then tried to refuse to give me the info until I talked to him and he got "closure" or some shit. According to texts to a mutual friend he also did some grimy narcy shit making reports that will fuck up my life even worse.
I called him back a few times encouraging him to kill himself, which I shouldnt have done but my anxiety is bad and I feel more violated and used than anyone else ever has done to me. To think I almost trusted him with my medicine to help me taper. To think I fucking even mailed him shit to help him. to think I trusted him with my personal details. Thank God I never did move in with him. I an see it now, him pissed off at me because I can't talk or explain things right, because im seizuring so hed probably flush my shit just being pissed I won't "explain" why I cant talk. Pretty fucking ear why I couldnt talk today, but he still fucking couldnt leave me the fuck alone and just let things calm down. Now he's gone to fuck my life up, and well... he already has.
I'm sorry, Tomas. FOr whatever reason you never EDIT:didn't NARC on me despite you wanting and even trheatening to at times. I apologize and I truly hope youre happy with your life, girlfriend, and whatever else. I hope all your dreams come to fruit and you continue writing. Sorry for the times I was a dick to you. Not that sorry fixes anything or whatevr but thouht youmiht like the satisfaction of being right at least.
Post last edited by hydromorphone at 2017-09-01T05:58:06.826412+00:00 -
2017-08-28 at 12:04 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by BULLDOZER2 just worndering if you are a grl
No, I'm a dude. I have a 12 inch big black cock. I've been pretending to be a single mother all this time for the lulz. When §m£ÂgØL got fucked in the ass for the first time, it was my monster horse cock that popped that tight little ass cherry. He had blood coming out his ass for days after, and he cried a lot... there was more blood working as lube than KY jelly we used... poor fella... It's not my fault I was born with such a magnanimously huge penis. I can't help the urges either; to ram my cock into such a cute little, scrawny spic twink like §m£ÂgØL. I don't think he ever shat right since that fateful day, in the cornfield in Florida. His poor asshole will never be the same size again. Last I heard, he was was incontinent, shitting all over his parents house. His mother wanted to press criminal charges. Can't blame his parents though, poor §m£ÂgØL's mom and dad have to chase him around the house, cleaning up the shit he trails behind as he goes. She tried refusing to feed him Frijoles Charros so he wouldn't be farting and shitting so much, with such... loose and disgusting diarrhea, but he had severe spic-food withdrawals, and actually trailed shit behind him with his walker (I did mention, I broke his hip in our ass-fucking love-making affair, didn't I?)while shaking in DTs, all the way to the nearest Spic restaurant where he shoveled down so many beans, they ended up banning him from the place for the explosion of shit he left splatter on one of the walls after he gorged himself... Quite sad, actually. I feel very remorseful for how much suffering I've caused his mother in having to wipe up the festering trails of bean-shit everyday. Poor old woman's golden days are spent shoveling feces out of her grown son's bed each morning, like she'd be mucking a horse stall. His father talked to a doctor, and they want to do reconstructive surgery, but §m£ÂgØL is afraid to do it, for fear of me coming around again, just to ripe his tight little asshole apart again... like I would again... I just couldn't stop myself... I'd NEED, like I need air to breath, to ram my cock back into his newly constructed ass... He couldn't control himself either... He'd beg me to fuck his ass, even despite the life altering damage I've already caused, and all the effort for a brand new asshole his parents would be paying for would just be for naught. He needs my cock in his tight ass, just the same as I need to have my cock there. His parents have refused to let him go anywhere now, and insist he never be allowed to be near me, because they know what I will do, and what he will let me do with his ass.
Why.. oh why was I born this monster I am with this humongous dick between my legs that seems to have a mind of it's own in going out and wrecking havoc on cute twink spics?! WHy has god cursed me to be a man?!?!
I just hope he's able to, despite my manliness and all its done, can move on with his life. Hopefully he can just live with the fond memory of that ass reaming and move forward and never look back. I, though, am stuck with the haunting image of what I've had and lost... the tightest spic asshole to grace the United States. *tear* We both must live with what we can nevr have again...
So, of course you should be able to tell I am in fact not a "grl". Thank you, cum again. -
2017-08-28 at 11:07 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Sophie It's Malice.
Holy shit, if that really is Mal-Mal, he really does look nice, and has a very appealing and attractive smile. I never could imagine Malice smiling before this. I'm no fan of mohawks, but I had a few friends here and there in my life who sported a mohawk, half of which were females. While not my taste, it does look good on him, very suiting, I think. Never would have thought that before, but seeing it on him, it is kinda cool, even though it definitely goes against my preferred tastes.
Originally posted by Erorr
I got stuck on this doodle once i stopped taking my seizure medication last year…. its sat so long unfinished. Wut do? Im so detached from that fluidity that started it but I really do like where this guy was going :/
That's really beautiful.
I have the same thing happen to just about everything I work on, be it writing or art, sadly.
Suggestion:
I used to draw doodles, or whatever, then take my sketch/drawing once I got to a point like yours, and print it out on watercolor paper. Then I would go over it and paint it with watercolor, but rather than panting with the white of the paper, as you're supposed to with that type of paint, I'd use it more like gouache paint, which is very similar to water color, but typically has more pronounced colors that are more solid in covering the white of the paper.
Shit, you could transpose it onto some black paper, then get some neon paint (glow in the dark would be cool too, or even black light reactive paint) and work on it.. maybe even expand it some more... but as it is now, it looks cool as fuck, so adding more might not be the answer. The answer might be to doll it up with color, sparkles, or what the fuck ever your creativity spurs you to do...
If you do more with it, especially if you take one of my suggestions, make sure to post it again. I am very interested in seeing what you do with it. Good luck, hope you have fun doing it. -
2017-08-27 at 6:41 PM UTC in Who's going to NYC with meI could be to NYC in a few hours... It's not terribly far. Nor is D.C. I used to live only 35 miles from D.C. growing up, until I moved to FL.
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2017-08-26 at 11:06 PM UTC in Cheezy dorito noodles mukbang (bill the cat can't eat 10k calories)
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2017-08-26 at 9:38 PM UTC in I've been shit posting so much latelyYou can do it, I believe in you, Mashy-poo.
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2017-08-25 at 7:39 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
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2017-08-25 at 5:44 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
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2017-08-25 at 3:52 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Captain Falcon I've timed a trip to California for the duration of the storm.
I've been thinking for a long time now... I bet you're related/involved with to those niggers I knew who bought hunting property up where I lived... They were heavy into real estate investments. The only one who was really cool was the grandfather and the husband and wife team who did a lot of work traveling all over FL to do work for them (both of them were crackheads, the husband though, while he wa a fucked up cuban, he at least wasn't a snake in the grass like his wife... she was a very opportunistic cunt.) Very sexist people. His wife was a total cunt, very stuck up, very judgemental people... Dude wasn't that bad, but... meh, he took advantage where he could, but to be fair she had it coming. I felt bad for the grandfather... his grandsons were being raised to be delicate little pussy bitches who were just one step above being put in a bubble to protect them from the world. It was clear as fuck that they embarrassed the ever living shit out of him.
You remind me of them from the way you post, shit you do, and apparent wealth, and I'm pretty sure you're living in the same general area as them. I know they have a lot of relatives who back his investments and shit too... Maybe I'm wrong, but even if I am, you're cut from the same cloth... -
2017-08-25 at 3:38 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Wick Sweat Dang hydromorphone literally became a prostitute for fake ass drugs. Let §m£ÂgØL hit the pussy too.. low quality female.
These nigggas that be like my life is sooo bad then make zero effort to change.
I wouldn't be in this situation right now if I hadn't made a leap to change and better my life and my living situation for my son and myself. I got burned hard by people who were supposed to be my family and help me. They went out of their way to fuck me over though... I take responsibility for it though. After all, there was a reason I stayed estranged for 14 years... in my desperation and mentally fucked state though, I made a seriously bad choice that I'll likely never recover from.
Originally posted by SpatianHaigency I've been alright. Have held down an ok job for well over a year now. Well clean from any benzo for what seems like forever now, but it's only been like 2 years I think.
Yeah, I did, until I moved out of FL. See comment above... I just recently began whoring myself out.
Sorry to hear you're being a prostitute now. I thought you had a waitress job ? I don't really read the ongoings of this thread too often .
Hope you sort it out.
*High Five*
I'm really happy to hear you got that monkey off your back, HSA, also proud of you. You're a good dude, and really hope shit gets even better for you as time goes on. Two years is a long time, and nothing to snub your nose at, it might as well be forever in the scheme of things, feels like forever when you're an addict that long... shit, I'm coming around on 5 years with using T-PAIN so... that certainly feels like an eternity. I've resigned myself to the fact that I'm going to die a T-PAIN addict though... hopefully sooner rather than later.
Glad to see you back around. You need to post more. You're the only person whom I got my sports updates from, when you used to post of the regular... and I don't follow sports at all so... not even been keeping up with the equine side of sports for a long time either...
I recall you'd mentioned years ago your mom had/got an arab. How'd that pan out? I love most arabian personalities. Fucking Jokers, and mischief-makers- as I said before, people either love them or hate them and they certainly aren't the horse for everyone. Most Arabians are really tough for their small size, and have un-godly endurance and have a lot of energy to harness, and is why they are a breed found in so many disciplines. I hate those Egyptian Arabs, and the best arabs I've seen hailed from Afghanistan... Always wanted to breed my Clydesdale to an fine arab mare, to throw out some badass sport horses/warmbloods. Oh well... maybe in another life.
Originally posted by mmQ Where do you get clients? Do you have a "bodyguard?" What's your rate? Will you do ANYTHING?
A friend I've known for a while who is an ex-coke dealer from back in the 70's-80's. He's on disability now. He's set me up with some of his friends, and also has paid for my services. Very nice guy, so it definitely could be worse. I do not have a bodyguard, but my friend, he is a decent human being, looks out for me, and makes sure shit is alright for me. He was strongly against me street walking, so once he heard I was game for prostituting, he worked to help me out. I charge 50$. I will not do anything, but I will a lot of things, most common requests.