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Posts by hydromorphone

  1. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by CASPER She sucked your soul energy dry as she did so many intrepid men before you. A husk of your former self.

    lol

    I was the only one burnt in the whole situation. I didn't do shit to him but show love and kindness, The husk of a man you see is the husk that's been there from go. I've paid my debts, and I've never used anybody. I've always been the one being used. My ex I supported for 11 years. My wrongs consist of telling his mother he was a pedo after he did insanely hurtful, destructive shit to my life, and not calling the police to get §m£ÂgØL to leave my house with my ex. (I wonder if he recalls after that, when he decided to stay and get pissy because he got a few shots rather than a bottle he didn't even pay for when I went to call the cops and then got physically assaulted. It makes me wonder if saying I was going to shoot him wasn't wrong, since I'd likely have been assaulted then too, had I not of had the gun in my hand, had I tried to call that time. I beginning to think what I did wrong was not force his ass out, or a the very least get a hold of a cop when he decided to harass and stalk me when I tried to leave my ex.) I'll never make that mistake again, mark my words.

    I let karma handle all my business. I don't need to waste my time on worthless people with no honor like PoC doing stupid voodoo shit.

    Originally posted by Lanny I'm not trying to say you were right or wrong, but it's kinda BS to say you're above someone else and forgive them the second after delivering a long winded philippic against their person. I don't know if what you're saying is fair account of what happened, I only care in the train-wrecks-are-exciting sense, but either way delivering an insult to an asshole is still delivering an insult. Forgiveness doesn't look like how you've been acting towards PoC.

    I'd be happy to show you our skype message transcript in private. I guess you're right, I did call him an idiot. I didn't even come back to post thinking he was posting here since last I knew he nuked his account. He's the one who messaged me, and also the one who continually said "out of principle" he was sending everything I gave him back. Forgiveness doesn't mean I suddenly forget what he did. I've said countless times I wished him well, and hoped he overcame his mental illness (and not in a sarcastic way, either), and up until now I stupidly was taking he blame for what HE did to me... I admit where I'm wrong, just done backpacking the blame for shit I didn't do. You know too, I am known for long posts, and they quite often aren't even to do with anything negative, or relating to this particular topic here- it's not like I wrote some long post specifically because of PoC's shit.

    If I was going to truly insult PoC, I'd insult him with shit I know would burn him, shit I know would hurt him to his core. I don't need or want to do that though. PoC is his own worst enemy. I don't have to wish, or hope, or try to destroy or ruin his life, he'll do that all on his own, because he likes being a victim to himself. I genuinely find that very sad though.

    Lanny, I realize my flaws, and mistakes, and I take responsibility for them. It's why I don't shy away from them, and I do apologize, and feel remorse for those wrongs, even when I have more than enough to justify my actions. I'm just tired of bearing burdens that are not mine, burdens I shouldn't bear, and I'm not going to let others continue to put that off on me and continue to be little and put me down anymore.
  2. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by Captain Falcon Nigga ain't nobody reading this bullshit

    :icon14:
  3. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by just one more mongol you have autism

    lanny is deficient in vitamin D

    No shit, Sherlock.
  4. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by Lanny uhh…

    I didn't insult his character, simply stated the truth. He did some seriously vile things, some seriously awful things, has gone on to say even more hurtful things, then has the nerve to insist I actually did something to deserve those actions, when I didn't. I had a particularly rough day, and needed to be alone for a while- that was my awful offense to PoC. I did love PoC, and initially, I blamed myself, and beat myself up over feeling like I failed someone who was dear to me. It took me a bit to realize, with the help of a friend, no, I failed nobody, I was the only one who was failed as a friend, as a partner, and I shouldn't beat myself up over things I didn't cause, I didn't do. I admit when I'm wrong, and even have remorse for such, I just won't be doing it anymore for things hat are not my doing, or failings.
  5. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by 霍比特人说中文不好 D-d-d-d-doIhearahundred? Onnneehndreddollars, oneoneoneone oneeeehundred dollaaarsss

    Yep, this is exactly the same situational reason I stopped caring when someone sent you threats. You and PoC are quite similr in being so self serving. PM me what you want for it and stop this stupid shit.

    Frankly the only reason I'm posting at all is because someone I care about is not doing well at all, I'm scared for them, and trying to distract myself. I am really stupid. Surely posting here does my anxiety no favors, but I suppose it's better than the reality of what I could be dwelling on.
  6. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by WhiskeyPhoenix It's not about money, its about me being a petty asshole. You said all I care about is hurting people, right? Then how can I have any cares left to expend on money? You got it right the first time, I'm a mean, shallow little asshole who likes to spread misery. If I was that money hungry I would have sold your instruments by now and bothered you about the $50 you said you were going to reimburse me for that phone card and money transfer but I don't give a fuck about it. You lying about me being a fucking pedophile and then trying to frame me for the death threats bullshit is when I lost the last shred of a fuck I had to give about you. Every bad thing I've ever said about you has been based on factual events, not outright defamatory lies and ridiculous speculation like you've come at me with so stop lecturing me about honor and dignity when you don't have any yourself.

    You are a petty person, but you do vest a lot in the almighty dollar.

    "Frame" you? lol omg, you're a fucking idiot. I haven't "framed" anybody. I've said from the start, I believe it to be you OR my ex. Yes, it's speculation, based on facts. You did some seriously fucked up shit, abused my trust, manipulated, and tried to control me. THe emails came about around the same time as all this shit according to §m£ÂgØL. Why would I put that past you? I have no doubt you'd have wanted to make me out to be as bad as you can, if you thought you could. You lost any shred of respect for me when, exactly? After I told your mother you were a pedo? Oh, then why did you abuse my trust, and fuck with my account? Why did you do the other shit you did too, then? You pull stunts like that and you don't expect people to be pissed off and angry? Yeah, I said it out of anger, and I apologized. I thought about causing you real grief, doing some dirty shit, but no, I'm not as low as you. Shit, I thought you mom didn't even tell you. You found out because I can at least admit to my wrongs, even if I did have justification for doing those wrongs. You had zero justification for what you did. You threatened me because I wouldn't talk to you, because I COULDN'T at that time. You gave zero shits waaaay before that about me, because if you had, you'd have let me deal with my seizures, and just talked to me the next day or so. You acted like I owed it to you to talk to you then and there- When I didn't owe you fucking shit. What? Some fucking phone card I didn't even want? In my situation, having a cell phone ha brought me waaay more anxiety than it's worth for the people I live with and I told you that on several occasions before you bought it. You bought it for yourself, not for me. I took me a while thinking on that before I decided, why should I give you more than I already have given you?


    As for the instruments, I never asked for those back. I only said, after you had said so many times that you WANTED to send them back (to do with some such nonsense as not wanting to be reminded of me), then fine, I'd rather then back then you destroying them, as you said you would do if I wouldn't take them. I only asked for my father's leatherman back, that was it. I'd given it to you to hang on to, and a sign of my trust in you.

    Honor and dignity arent the same as being perfect, and I know I am far from a perfect person. I told you before, I don't lie to the people I love. That is my honor. I never lied to you, and stupidly enough, I did love you. My dignity was apologizing, and admitting to my wrongs, even when I had every reason in the world to do and say that, and more. I didn't love you mother, and yeah, in anger, that's what I told her. I mean hell, you and her have such a good relationship, it was stupid, because of course she won't believe that from some girl you were dating. The next day I'd ask you if she told you what'd I'd said, and you didn't even know, because she didn't even tell you. I apologized for that, and for the insults I'd said to you when you used that bullshit to hold over my head just so you could talk to me. Just because you needed to feel like a big man and dominate someone who'd given you all their trust, everything. You might look down on me for when I've prostituted (if you'd have only said you didn't want me to do that, and had a problem with me doing it, I wouldn't have, else I wouldn't have talked to you about it and been open about it- when the first time you just said "I'm not against it for the reasons you think I am" and elaborated that you were concerned for my safety, I respected that, and didn't bring it up again, or go against that, until a safe avenue came about, and at hat, I ask you if you had a problem with it and you said no.), or even my physical dependency to T-PAIN, but I never lied to YOU, I never took from you, or abused your trust- even now, and you know damned well I have things you'd prefer I didn't say- and I won't. You might say I have no way to do you dirty like you did me... it's neither here nor there, because I'm not as low as you, and I wouldn't.

    Since you want to mention the pedo thing here, why don't you tell me why you left threatening messages on my answering machine, called me over 15 times, threatened to chop my door down with an axe, harassed me on skype, doing all this when I said simply "I can't do this right now, I'm not well. I love you, I'll talk to you later, bye." when we were video chatting, then messaged 1337 when you couldn't get me to answer (dude, I seriously couldn't- I was having seizures, and had been all day. I'd messaged you that morning mentioning that I'd ha one before I left for my appointment. It wasn't like I made that shit up on the spot as an excuse, like you've insinuated I have. Even said before you called the first time, I felt that aura, like I was going to have another one.) to have him pass on the message of the fucked shit you'd done to me, being a petty and childish.

    You really are delusional, PoC, to sit here and act like I did anything to justify how you treated me. Surely, I wasn't perfect, but my faults as your girlfriend were mild, and simple faults, and never did I do anything in anger to hurt you. Even in our relationship, you belittled and demeaned me over the silliest and pettiest of shit. You say I "talked down" to you or whatever, which I never, ever did, and especially didn't intend to. You often would apologize after you treated me like shit, and every time... every single fucking time, I would forgive and even say you had no reason to apologize, and excuse your ill behavior toward me. Anything I said to you through that, I said to you as a friend, and someone I loved. I'm sorry you couldn't see that. I'm sorry you're too dense to see love when it sits before you. I'm sorry you're so sad and lonely, all you have in you is anger toward anyone that isn't sad and lonely like you.

    Tell me, Why are you so petty toward me? Really, what exactly did I do to deserve what you've done to me? What exactly did you lose, I mean... you message me saying I "teased" you with something you could never have (and if that meant love, well... you had it all that time, you were just too blind to see it. You had my honesty, and my loyalty too. If I wasn't an honest person, I wouldn't have even mentioned 1/10th of the shit I talked to you about. I can't help you were jealous of 1337, but at least at the time, you had no reason to feel threatened by him, and I tried every way I could to prove to you he wasn't a threat.)

    I forgive you though. I'm not petty like you and I won't hold onto anger.
  7. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by 霍比特人说中文不好 I have hydro's deceased father's buck knife. 5" or so with a fish hook. Good grip. I'm starting the bidding at $75, priority shipping included.

    Wow. You really are a piece of work.

    You know why I gave you that? I gave it to you because before my father died, he really did love you, and accepted you as part of our family. He talked about you a lot, and never had a bad thing to say about you, and anything you want to say about me, or Fucktard, or even my grandmother, my father never did anything, but be kind, generous and good to you. Even then you have gone on to shit on him, saying some down right awful things. I don't even know why, and there certainly was no justification to shit on the memory of a dead man that did nothing but welcome you into his family and show you kindness, even if you dislike, even hate his daughter. Before he died he'd mentioned getting you a Christmas gift. He was excited and asked often about when you were coming back to visit, which was a pretty rare thing, considering he was an exceptionally antisocial person. That's why. I thought you'd understand and appreciate the importance, and if not for me, just for the sake of decency, and the fact my father was a good person to you, and did care about you.

    Since it means nothing to you, and you're offering it up, I'll tell you what, I'll buy it back from you. You want $75? Give me a couple weeks, and I'll drop it into your paypal account. That knife wasn't as sentimental to me as the leatherman, but still, it was his, and if you'd shit on him, then yeah, I would rather buy it back from you, since I really don't have all that much to remember him by. I don't even have his ashes anymore.

    Not terribly surprised. I've seen for a little while now, and been reminded just recently of your character. As much as I would like to see, and have tried to see you a decent person, you continue to show yourself for the manipulative, user of a person you are. A spineless and shallow person, unfortunately.
  8. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by CASPER Can i have it? I had a vintage leatherman in high school, but i think i lost it when i was drunk.

    It's a nice one. I spent like $125 for it a few years back to give to my dad for Christmas. BEst Christmas gifthe said he ever got, he loved it quite a bit. Saved my dad and my own ass a few times when we had car trouble. Pretty sad though someone would hold something so sentimental over my head, when it was given to hold out of trust, love, and hoping it would do him the same as it'd done us all those years, in the event of an emergency. lol it's not even like I did anything wrong to deserve that sort of treatment. Just shows the character of the person. lol Hell, he's got like over 500$ worth of shit I gave him for his birthday, including my son's $300 ukulele I left for him to play around with since he said he wanted to learn, and figured he could play with that until he got strings for the guitar I gave him. lol he said for over a month he'd send ALL of it back when I all cared about was my dad's leatherman. Real piece of work, that one. He doesn't even know what a good knife/multi-tool is.

    If you put a price on it, I'll buy it from you, PoC, since all you care about is money.

    If he does give it to you, I hope it serves you well, and the offer to buying it back remains open.
  9. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by mashlehash hydro is a black widow

    Then why the fuck are all these assholes still alive?

    Originally posted by Panthrax i never knew you were black ydro

    I'm not. I have a pretty pale complexion, actually. When I wear make up, I have to use the lightest foundation, especially if I haven't been in the sun for a long while, even at that, my face doesn't tan very much.


    Originally posted by mashlehash Man, I want to see someone in stilleto hills smash someone's nuts.

    Uh... that sounds painful. I do have one pair of stiletto heels, but fuck, dude... I'm not going to do that.
  10. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    wtf is up with two 'tarded threads? I think on zoklet there was jolly green giants cock edition anyway.
  11. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by mashlehash DESTROY THEM

    NoO! Bats are cool, nigga.
  12. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by 霍比特人说中文不好 Also what is your opinion on bats? I think they're quite scary!

    bats are pretty cool, actually. I once rescued two bats fucking in the parking lot of the Walmart I was working at around 3am. I scooped them onto a news paper and when I got them over to a grass spot they decided they were done and flew up into my hair and shit- not cool- but over all, I think they're neat critters.
  13. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by SpatianHaigency I for onr am happy that hydro is generally happy(ier) and also getting laid.

    What you been up to? Life treatin' you good, I hope?
  14. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by WhiskeyPhoenix You're a stupid cunt hydro, I'm not going to quote your insane ramblings just to say that and I'm not doing this back and forth trailer park drama with you anymore. You're not getting your dad's shitty knife back, you aren't worth the 20 minutes it takes me to drive to the post office or the $5 it costs to ship it. Not saying anything else to you.
    I figured, just remember, karma's a bitch. Shows your true colors, your lack of honor. I don't keep my word because I feel the other party is worth it, I keep it, because my word, my honor is worth it. (BTW, I did offer to send money for shipping, so don't at like it'd cost you anything out of your pocket. I'd rather you keep it or do whatever with it, just so I can remember you as the liar, thief, and manipulator you are.)

    You're right, I am stupid. I was stupid for trusting you, and doing anything I did do for you. Now, go ahead, and gloat knowing you fucked over another person who only tried to do good by you. You're the one who's going to live the sad, lonely life you created for yourself though. If I'm stupid, you're down syndrome retarded.

    It's funny, when you thought I'd be miserable just like you, you even said you were sorry. All because I move on, and actually have people who love and support me, it just burns you up inside. I know you too well, PoC. I was honestly hoping to be surprised by you, but no surprises here, just a sad little man, who only knows how to hurt others, only wants to hurt others, with no word or honor to speak of. Just jealous of the fact that their ex-girlfriend isn't alone, miserable, and isolated, like you are. You really are a pitiful thing.

    Remember, I didn't come here to talk to you. I didn't come here to say a word to you. You're the one who replied to my post. Shit, before you did, I thought you weren't posting anymore since you nuked your account. So, before you start accusing me of engaging in "trailer park" drama, think on that.

    Weed smoker: Hardy-har-har. Really, what does it matter to you? I'm not fucking any married men for the record.

    It's funny, men can run around fucking bitches left and right. You'd high-five that behavior, even if they had a wife/girlfriend. But me, someone, single, not attached to anyone, never cheated or lied to anybody... for some reason I get called a slut and treated in a demeaning way.

    §m£ÂgØL: You know I've tried to be civil to you, to most everyone here. You're the one just showing your ass. It's like you get off on trying to provoke me. In a way, it's quite funny I've had such an impression on someone, that they can't help but be triggered every time I post.

    Captain Falcon: Can't stand to see me happy, I guess.

    Hate is a wasteful, soul stealing emotion, and I won't be wasting any hate on any of you. I hope you all figure out your shit, hope you all find whatever it is that'll make you content with life, and others in it.
  15. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by Bill Krozby actually you do need to have your animal "certified" by federal law… fake service dogs are a federal offense….
    smh….


    There's no standard, or required certification that they need, by federal law. Now, there are tons of people/organizations who cash in on certifications though. A service animal is one which assists a person with a medical disability. There are dogs whom can tell when someone is going to have a seizure, or diabetics and low blood glucose, or as your purpose, to assist with a psychiatric disability. Most people think of mobility service dogs, such as with the blind, or like my father who had mobility issues due to injuries, but a service animal is a service animal if it assists with a disability.
  16. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by WhiskeyPhoenix You saw what my last message to you said. I wasn't responsible for the emails. §m£ÂgØL knows I wasn't responsible for the emails. Everyone knows it was you. No, I didn't pull out your laptop and rifle through your email contacts while you slept to sabotage you months later you delusional nutjob. But keep painting those kind of fantasy scenarios in your head to justify your shitty existence. Be happy we've been out of contact and stop trying to stir the pot again with your psychotic theories and musings. I told you it's in your best interest to stop implicating me in something I didn't do. Pretty shallow to frame someone for death threats but not at all a surprise coming from someone who is such a low quality human being like yourself. No one missed you, go crawl back in your hole.
    Well, it wasn't me. I have no reason to, nor have I ever threatened or wished any ill on §m£ÂgØL. If I did it, I certainly wouldn't have told him to go to the police about it ASAP, and even given him my #'s in the event they needed to talk to me. have nothing to hide, as I didn't do shit to §m£ÂgØL. Implicated? lol dude, it was either my ex or you and that's all I know and you've done enough crazy, retarded shit for me to think you might, your word means nothing anymore, you've lost any respect I had for you as a person. I don't know if you did or didn't, but you had opportunity, and motive is what I know. You're the nut job here who fucking flips their shit and threatens to use an axe to chop down their door when they asked to be left alone for a while. You're the one who blames ME for "teasing me with something I can never have" as you put it. You're the one who did some truly fucked up shit to a person who'd only ever shown you love and kindness. I could add more fucked shit to this, but I'm not going to stoop to your level. Hate me because you're a destroyer and self defeater and have to twist me into some awful person to justify your own insane, hurtful, irrational actions. LULZ too at the fact you go however long not posting here, only begin again once we were together because I do, bitch the WHOLE time about it, nuke your account, then end up making a new account, just like I said would happen.

    I really do wish you the best, and good luck with all that. You probably will be miserable forever, but you can't blame anyone but yourself. The last message I got was a thinly veiled suicide threat after I said I'd rather be doing other things rather than listen to you being delusional and angry at me for things I am not responsible for. I really only want my father's leatherman back which you said you would return, if you're not going to return the other shit you said you would. I ended up blocking you, so if you messaged after that, well, I didn't get it. All I know is I got used and fucked over by you, and you are no different than anyone else you claim to be better than. What did I get out of our relationship? Not a goddamned thing. I never took anything from you save your cheap ass necklace you gave me and I returned that. Be an asshole who takes and uses and sulks because he's going to be alone forever if you want, or be a man who has his word, I don't care really, I've gotten used to be fucked around.

    Finally, I don't care if anyone misses me or not and I'm done crawling in holes because of people like you. Sadly the only people who'll miss you are some people on some shit-tier forum, if you're lucky. I have people IRL who love and miss me just because I'm going to be away for a while longer, I certainly don't care what the majority of some fucked form thinks of me being gone or not. I felt froggy, so deal with it.


    Originally posted by Wick Sweat Hearing you talk about sex is so disgusting. Obviously its to make Giuseppe jealous like thats gonna work. Lmao you drove to ride 1337s married cock. You rode §m£ÂgØLs small dick. You're such a retard.

    lol cool story bro.

    I didn't drive anywhere. My friend gave enough fucks about me to get me a plane ticket so I don't have to drive anymore than I already do.

    As for making PoC jealous, why would I care to do that? lol It probably does, but that's beside the point. My problems have been with taking stock in people like him, give myself, and do everything I can for people like him, and those people don't return the same, not even 1/10th of what I give. I'm not doing that anymore, but even at that, there are those who love me, who care about me, and who do just the same as I would for them, if not more. Whether PoC is jealous because another man is fucking me, or not, the real jealousy comes from the fact he will be alone forever because of his own self defeat, and return any love given with destruction to them, and himself. It's kinda sad, really, but the days of feeling sorry for people like that are over for me.

    §m£ÂgØL isn't hung like a horse or anything, but I wouldn't say he's "small", but definitely, 1337 does have a cock bigger than §m£ÂgØL and PoC put together so... but I didn't "drive to ride 1337's married cock" either. Even if I did, there something wrong with a heterosexual female wanting cock and to be treated like a princess? I had a good time and had small break from all the bullshit I've been dealing with at their expense, not mine, for once in my life.

    Originally posted by 霍比特人说中文不好 People tend not to forget when you point a gun at them. My advice to you in the future is to not point guns at people. I personally have never pointed a gun at anybody and it's worked out pretty well.

    Never said you should forget. I don't even care if you forgive. My problem here is this passive aggressive resentment, and usery you keep going on with toward me. One minute you'll be okay, even nice when you want or need something from me, then the next, over nothing I'll have emotional abuse hurled at me going from blaming me for being a victim of rape, to demeaning me for what I've had to do to survive. There was no call for all that. Anytime I may have brought up something inadvertently that bothered you and brought you any sort of mental anguish, I apologized, and dropped it. You're just not going to be happy until you hurt me some more is all, but now I'm wise enough to not take that kind of shit from people anymore, so you get pissed you can't have the last word and is why you'd pelt me with emails and messages when I walk away. It's why it seems like every fucking post you make just about is geared toward some insult to me, or if I post anything, you're sure to respond with some dumb shit, rather than just moving on and letting it be, as I've tried to do with you. You're not a saint because you refused to leave someone's house when told to, given ample time to pack, and then said they'd shoot you if you refused to leave, when they'd been apart of psychological abuse and harassment with my ex just prior. I did have a gun, but never once did it get pointed at you, or even in your direction. You were hiding like a bitch in the other room, and rather than fucking getting your shit to leave, you hid under your blanket and cried. After a few minutes, realizing the distress I was causing you, I even tried to give you the gun. I get it, and what I did was not wrong, you have reasons to be hurt over that, but cut it to fuck out with your manipulative bullshit. You also forget to mention every time about all this, you ended up stay 3 months after this happened, again using the situation to be coddled and drink like a fish. All I said was I was sorry, and just hated that you had to leave under the circumstances, but knew you had to go. You decided after to stay, and you certainly weren't forced. Shit you felt comfortable enough to trip 4 or 5 times while down too, and took zero responsibility for doing so then battering a 7month along pregnant woman by kicking her in the stomach. You like to bring up about how you should have called the cops on me for the gun incident. You're right, I should have called the police then to get your ass out of my house, along with Faggot, or at the least, after you attacked me while tripping.

    Any wrong I may have done still doesn't justify your wrongs, abuses, and manipulation. I haven't forgotten what you've done, nor will I, but I still know how to move on, and be civil. I at least accept my faults, and have remorse, where you (and PoC for that matter) are too immature to do so. Good luck with that.

    Post last edited by hydromorphone at 2017-10-21T04:22:25.531254+00:00
  17. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by 霍比特人说中文不好

    Yeah, because you know everything about my life years before I knew you IRL. I'd trained my father's mastiff for service work. That dog would get the phone (when we used to have a house phone that is), a water bottle, and would brace herself to help someone who's fallen/on the ground get up. For a year I took her every where since she was 8 weeks old. My father was the one who got over protective of her and stopped using her for her intended purpose and pretty much made her into a house pet. Back then I did help a few others train their dogs, or start out pups for just such purposes. A long time ago, I actually made decent money training horses too, and I clarified it to be dog for which I trained for service work, since well, any animal can be used as long as it suits the purpose; Ive seen miniature ponies, pigs, ferrets too. You're right, that I never put an exceptional amount of effort into all the dogs I had at the time I met you. I was working, depressed, and shortly there after got pregnant, and it wasn't an exceptionally easy pregnancy at that. I don't think you understand what depression, being overwhelmed, along with more and more health issues presenting rapidly, can do to a person because you've never experienced it yourself. I had very little help, and very little support emotionally through then too. Say what you want, but I know what I've done, and am capable of doing, at least back in the day before shit snow-balled on me.
  18. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    You dn't need to have an animal "certified" by federal law. If you take an animal with you anywhere the general public is allowed, you are only allowed to be ask "Is this a service animal?" and if you say yes, then they can't fuck with you or go further, and it's all they are allowed to ask. They aren't required to have a vest, ID, or any form of certification, nor are you required to show it if they do have it, or display the animal is a service animal anywhere (though it is helpful to not have idiots give you unneeded shit).

    I used to train service animals, dogs. I did both for physical mobility and anxiety disorders, like I have. For 2 years I couldn't even go in a store, but I began taking my dog with me and he helped tremendously get over being able to go places like a normal person without having a panic attack every time I went. I began because of my father, who did need a dog for mobility, since they aren't cheap, and he needed a larger do anyway, we trained her ourselves.
  19. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Just feeling froggy enough to say I'm not dead yet. Despite all the bitches and haters, and people who've done their damnedest to try to drag me under, there's still a few people who have been real, true friends and love and care about me, and I really am only here because of one person. I've been through a lot of shit and that one person has always been my friend through it all. I don't deserve a friend like that, nor any of the people who at least tried to reach out to me, but I do appreciate it.

    and if anyone cares to know: No, I have not been in jail, or with any bullshit, legal trouble or otherwise, despite what §m£ÂgØL may have said. I didn't do shit to that faggot, don't know who was sending that shit or whatever, and all I did was try, after being made aware by him, attempt to figure out who it was (I think my exhusband, but very well could have been PoC since he too is a snake in the grass). I would just like to be left alone by him if civility cannot be managed, as was seen the last time. I know I did my share of wrong, but hanging on to resentment, hatred, and anger does nothing for anybody. I have tried several times to make amends for my wrongs, but it'll never be enough, so I really don't care, nor will I go out of my way for any reason again, just to be shat on because of the things I've had to do in my life (you know damn well I was joking and kidding just the same, and even said what I said about that to assure you I wasn't saying it because I thought anything wrong with that, just it was my opinion. You never said it bothered you. I did when you decided to bring what was attempting to be a compliment to be something to shit on what I've had to do to survive. "Well you've openly admitted" yeah, I have. So what. Doesn't mean I wanted to do that with those people that handful of times. Then why the raft of emails too. I just wanted to be left alone and yeah, I really, really don't care anymore if you live or die. You'll just always use me for your end, the shit on me given any chance and give no fucks how things hurt, even traumatize people, because hey... I hurt you however long ago and you're still resentful over it despite me doing everything a person can to try and make it right. At this point, I don't even care.)

    I just got back from vacation a few days ago. It was nice, I had a good time, just wish I didn't have to come back to this and could spend more time with my friend who pre-cums like a clydesdale, riding that cock. Too bad he only planned for a few days rather than longer. Ah well, it was nice while it lasted.

    I'm probably not going to be posting much. I heard through the grape-vine about §m£ÂgØL saying shit, I haven't been lurking and probably won't, so I'll leave this here too.

    Reststop: when you got back to me, shit was very chaotic and well, I didnt see you PM until the other day.
    Discount Whore 2.0: Well, obviously... thank you both for your kindness and concern.
    Risir: Just because. Thanks. Hope you're doing alright.
  20. hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Originally posted by aldra did this happen

    Nobody was in there when I last checked. It doesn't matter. I don't give a fuck.

    Adios, cowboys.

    I loved those I loved, truly, genuinely, even if I did end up hurting most, if not all of them. I loved them no less, and sorry for the hurt I inflicted. It was never my intention.

    This is it. See ya on the other side.
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