Posts by Item 9

1. 2019-01-11 at 5:22 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Sploo Needs Attention
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   Probably soft serve ice cream
2. 2019-01-11 at 5:19 AM UTC in I make more in a year than you make in a week.
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   How do you like them apples 🍎
3. 2019-01-11 at 5:16 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Sploo Needs Attention
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   2👱🏼‍♂️'s 1 🐴
4. 2019-01-10 at 10:06 AM UTC in I'm seriously deliberating ending my life.
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   When you reach this age, and fail this miserably and terribly at life... when you're so far behind everybody else that you have no chance of catching up... you're pretty much just supposed to kill yourself... I mean... you're just supposed to. So thats what I am now making my life mission. I have nothing to look back on and nothing to look forward to. And I just simply don't want to live. This is goodbye. I am the epitome of failure and at least by commiting suicide I'll die with dignity.
   Choosing to not kill myself at this point would only be choosing the slower, longer death.
5. 2019-01-10 at 7:53 AM UTC in I aint lying this is a nice little bunker, (can I come in)
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   Att the end of the day, no
6. 2019-01-10 at 4:37 AM UTC in Nitrous Oxide is Awesome.
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   Of all the trucks i've done (basically everything except cocaine, PCP, and mushrooms) Nitrous Oxide is hands down the best out of the all.
   
   "But you're only high like 20 seconds"
   
   Such an awesome truck that delivers heaven on earth can only last so long. So what? Just load another whippit :icon14: 👍
   
   The world would be so much better if N2O was Recreatiomally legal, + abundant at bars & shit, and abundantly available.
   
   And I ain't even hit the shit in months
7. 2019-01-10 at 3:34 AM UTC in A Love Letter for Deaf Ears; Drenched in Salty Lonely Tears
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut

   Originally posted by gadzooks there's quite a substantial age difference,

   
   Is she your junior or senior?
8. 2019-01-10 at 1:17 AM UTC in How would you go about commiting a flashing?
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   I'd take out my dick when it's a semi and set it in the counter when I'm buying something while then cashier is counting my change.
9. 2019-01-10 at 1:03 AM UTC in REBAN INFINITYSHOCK!!
   

   Item 9 African Astronaut
   y
10. 2019-01-10 at 12:57 AM UTC in I'm a Planet Fitness Black Card member , and it serves many advantages for me...
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    I'm gonna start tanning there.
11. 2019-01-10 at 12:56 AM UTC in It's too bad my dick can't reach far enough to go in my ass.
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut

    Originally posted by infinityshock of course you dont. you much prefer someone elses dick crammed all up in there while your flaccid, inadequate flapper-doodle flails around uselessly as your asshole gets pounded.

    
    But it ain't gonna make my dick any bigger 😔
12. 2019-01-10 at 12:46 AM UTC in It's too bad my dick can't reach far enough to go in my ass.
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    Just kidding, I don't give a shit about not being able to fuck my own ass, I probably wouldn't even if I could, and if I could and wanted too I'd still wear a rubber.
13. 2019-01-10 at 12:32 AM UTC in I pay $239 a week, after taxes, to stay at Motel 6...
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    Sounds like a decemt rate to me.
14. 2019-01-09 at 7:46 PM UTC in You know is what sad?
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    If I was rich (lets just say) and I had the ... sh shit, I forgot cause im drunk.
15. 2019-01-09 at 4:21 PM UTC in A Love Letter for Deaf Ears; Drenched in Salty Lonely Tears
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    At least you have that memory in your back pocket to go back to and re-play litterally anytime you want, and it's actually real.
    
    
    So, uh yeah... what are you even complaining about?
16. 2019-01-09 at 2:57 PM UTC in 211 is nasty
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    211 is gross, I just gagged after I took a sip
17. 2019-01-09 at 1:53 PM UTC in 💔
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    Lollipops & rainbows.
18. 2019-01-08 at 10:05 PM UTC in It’s baby time
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    You should sell your wifes titty milk 🍼💵💰
19. 2019-01-08 at 9:22 PM UTC in Let's stick lit blowtorches up our assholes and sing the Pledge of Allegiance
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    I'd sooner kill myself by blowing up my lungs with ignited nitrous.
20. 2019-01-08 at 9:18 PM UTC in Eyes are funny and telling
    

    Item 9 African Astronaut
    All I can see in people eyes is Iris and pupils