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Thanked Posts by Malice
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2017-07-13 at 5:51 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Kinkou My dad had sepsis twice, cancer, he now has a hole in his bladder that's leaking and has to go to daily oxygen treatments to speed healing processes… this been going on since Labor Day
Believe me; I want my 7 day a week job back, I'm tired of being broke but I want my dad healthy more than having money
Originally posted by Kinkou Not to mention my dad has no money and says he's paying me for all this work, but right now it's just debt for him being racked up until he can make money again or file retirement or disability
Girl, your daddy's a goner. Based on everything you've told us, along with having part of his intestine removed and having a second colostomy bag, no way he's gonna make it.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-13 at 11:41 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSAspie power demonstration in Kroger and analysis, visual hypersensitivity, memory, learning, and intelligence. Also realized, which I extensively detailed, that I literally display ever single symptom of Asperger's to a strong extent.
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-13T11:45:58.957312+00:00The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-12 at 4:50 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSI just remembered that I actually used a milligram scale when I first started smoking (vaping) weed, at 23. I made a thread documenting my experiences as a new stoner. Man, that was a great fucking period. It retained its magic for months, at least. Cannabis was the best at its peak. It was so much complex and substantial than I expected it to be.
It's kind of funny to look back at that Asperger's behavior. I think it may have taken me 40 minutes to prepare (I'm not sure what I was doing.) for the first time.
In retrospect, if I had never done any of that obsessive and excessive autistic research and preparation it pretty much would have made no difference.
Mash was right in that thread, "u dont need no dang science to smoke weed".The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-12 at 2:42 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSOh crap, I forgot I took 86mg of flmodafinil this morning. Pretty good balanced dose, doesn’t feel excessive. It’s like it unlocks a substantial amount of potential power. Of course there are the benefits of energy (Including cognitive) and endurance.
Cognitively there’s a general boost of everything.
Particularly fascinating is the IRL substantial cognitive performance boost. I was at Grocery Outlet 10 minutes ago. I was able to jog down the aisles and take in so much information at once, process it, that I could analyze nearly everything in my field of vision, the entire shelves, without moving my eyes to scan. I wasn’t simply looking for specific or familiar items, identifying things by shape. Missing nothing of interested despite the high speed and not needing to rapidly move my eyes around to focus on specific things, unless something caught my eye for a good reason. I could finish far faster than a normal person would.
This is awesome. With Nardil enabling the beginning of this change, recovery, I’m unlocking the full power of my mind.
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-12T02:48:55.981157+00:00
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-12T02:54:40.091517+00:00The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-12 at 2:05 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSI just clocked myself at 1200 wpm while reading a post I made yesterday, the absurdist self satire post about asperger’s. No skimming or anything, taking in everything.
Yet another aspie power. It’s a combination of high speed processing, visual differences, and the memory quirk.
Because it’s passively stored so accurately, I can reread things I’ve read before, especially if I wrote them, at a far faster rate.
This is going to be great for studying in school, as well as my independent learning, rereading books and papers.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 11:38 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Captain Falcon Didn't read the whole post but will say that you're relatively attractive Malice, you should put yourself out there.
Wowiee! What a compliment. Honestly, one of the most positive things I remember hearing in a long time, with regard to the emotion it evokes. I suppose I may just lack confidence and be insecure.
Being told you’re relatively attractive feels nice.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-04 at 10:01 PM UTC in BirthdaysWhy would I celebrate the worst thing that ever happened to me? To me every passing year is simply the increasing deterioration of my body and advance of death.
Well, that's one view. On the other I do understand the value of birthdays for interpersonal and intertemporal (between people and through time) coordination. They can also be a celebration of a person's life while they're here and decide to stick around; which seems to be the standard method of celebration, and the best. Must be nice if you have close friends, instead of just feeling obligated to do so, having it thrust upon you by family or coworkers you don't even (particularly) like.
It's presents that particularly bother me. I'm unbelievably picky and elitist. I naturally prefer an extremely ascetic and minimalist lifestyle, at least with regards to possessions, and there's very little I like. I know that if I ever did have relationships it would be excruciatingly difficult for others to understand who I am, to predict what I may desire and enjoy, if anything. The other critical aspect is that I don't display a normal range of human emotions or to a conventional intensity (unusually weak), I also immensely dislike false displays of emotion, so most things will simply evoke absolutely no reaction from me, which would be extremely awkward, guilt inducing.
Really, something practical or heartfelt and homemade would be best. Not something I'll have to worry about for a long time. I wouldn't even tell anyone my birthday until I felt ready.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 10:50 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSIt’s nice when you catch a girl checking you out and are able to observe them without them noticing, the shy glances they give you, how they become nervous and quiet around you/when you come near. Subtle differences, usually.
I sure as hell wasn’t interested, just to be clear. She was fucking fat and a teen. I have never seen a woman that was overweight who I thought was attractive.
It’s about fueling the glorious ego, shamelessly exploiting the natural biological responses of man.
Right as I was walking past them on the train to change to a car with even less people I felt confident, manly and virile, as if I was cruelly, sadistically, displaying what she could never have, yet without those negative emotions. Strutting, but not in a flamboyant tasteless manner, it’s as if my natural strut was perfectly designed for me. I’m not certain how to describe it, but it feels gloriously designed.
Damn shame I can’t currently manually engage it.
Of course it’s been extremely rare due to the incredible aversion and feeling of hostility toward others, extreme misanthropy. Asperger’s has also played a major role due to how hostile and threatening eye contact naturally feels, having led to me turning my head 90 degrees away from them just for passing me from the front on the sidewalk. It was very uncomfortable.
Nardil has changed this, which is a remarkable difference to observe.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 8:16 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Discount Whore 2.0 You said your field of vision is above 180 degrees. That has to be physically impossible
Also Im a biologist not a psychologist
I could definitely be improperly calculated, but it's clear that I can see the screen door, which is past 90 degrees to my right, while focusing on a spot straight ahead. It's barely past 180. Maybe 200 total. I'm 100% sure I'm not inadvertently moving my eye(s) (Only the right one matters.).
I noticed this a long time ago, in high school at least. Experimented with it, learned to control some aspects for it. For example, I can change my focus so that I'm fixating on visual information directly in front of me, from my binocular range in general, and focus on the peripheral ends, one side of it or both concurrently (More difficult.). I'm not simply unfocusing my eyes.
I suppose the feeling is like one of increased concentration and almost like very rapidly mildly spacing out, except of course I'm fully lucid and aware. My perception is altered so there's a clear shift in where I'm focusing and how much visual data from that range is being processed, how clear that region seems, the distinct feeling that it's being focused on.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 7:52 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Discount Whore 2.0 Malice I enjoy your presence but you're delusional and you dont have autism super powers
What super powers? I just stated that my peripheral vision was unusually wide and detailed/accurate. I even clearly stated that there were drawbacks and it's not particularly useful in everyday life.
Sensory, visual, hypersensitivity is a common symptom, it's explicitly listed. There's an immense amount of data on it, including specifically on the visual differences and their neurological foundation.
For shame, for someone in the field of science.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 7:44 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Discount Whore 2.0 Enough with the autism already
It was perfectly relevant. What if all 3/3 female members has Asperger's? It would be a valuable scientific finding. Provide further evidence to support the profound understanding I have of Asperger's.
I was genuinely just about to post something related to it as I clicked this thread.
I'm pretty sure my field of vision is above 180 degrees, the peripheral vision unusually wide. The normal range is 155. It's kind of annoying when I can see/notice the screen door, leaving the standard door behind it open to let in sunlight and air, and movement to the right and back while looking directly ahead at my screen.
Only it's good for inside is noticing when a cat comes by for food or Ash wants to come in. I suppose it could have some benefits IRL. It's practically impossible for a normal person to sneak up on me and I can look behind me discreetly just by turning my head slightly to the left of right.
The neurological differences that lead to this are somewhat fascinating.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 7:12 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSKreepyKay, have you ever taken the autism-quotient test or been diagnosed with Asperger's?
https://niggasin.space/thread/11907
The reason I'm asking is because we have a lot of members here with it, relative to the general population. The diagnosis is under 1/1,000 total, possibly 1/5K or 10K for females, although I believe it's likely considerably underdiagnosed due to milder or atypical cases that are harder to identify along with the well documented differences in behavior female aspies tend to have, which is unsurprising since they're still another gender. Some believe it's overdiagnosed due to hearing it claimed what they believe is an excessive number of times online, but their perceptions are highly biased and completely unreliable. A major problem is the rate of self-diagnosis by people online who have no reason doing so, socially awkward geeks who believe it explains and excuses all their problems. I'm referring to actual professional diagnoses, which are far more extensive and should be conducted only by a specialist in ASD (autism spectrum disorders). So, doing the math, it's massively overrepresented on here.
Kinkou is already diagnosed and scored 39/40, Hydro scored 33/40 and has a pretty high chance of having it as well. That's 2/3 of our female posters, which doesn't surprise me either due to the distribution curves.
There are strong biases for self-selection, for who has chosen to remain here this long. I've seen the exact same overrepresentation has been noticed on other message boards. Multiple on average differences in the traits aspies have, how strongly they display them. Personality, behavior, cognition.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 12:25 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by hydromorphone I respect you a lot more for your respect of animals, Mal, and your mutual understanding for how I felt about my "pack".
I'm so unemotional, have developed my mind, to the point where I've genuinely never gotten significantly angry at Ash more than slightly mild and very short lasting irritation. Lately it's just been pretending to be angry to get her to learn to get off the sink. I know about the myths of discipline and hitting animals, which unfortunately many people believe, but I've genuinely never hit Ash. I've been bitten and scratched lightly when she was in her frisky mode or irritated by me petting her or checking her skin. Now it's pretty easy to avoid, since I can read her better. I notice when her purring style changes if I'm petting her, or if her eyes are dilated and tail is moving at an energetic pace. They're really just warning shots and have never hurt me, her teeth have never broken the skin to any extent. unfortunately when grasping things, and due to other cats naturally being protected by fur, they do naturally use their claws too strongly with humans. It only happened when she had been laying on her side and I reached toward her to pet her from the front, during a mood where she must not have wanted to be petted, she would rarely reach out towards me and pull my hand in to give it a very light warning bite/nibble. They were really light surface scratches though, the smallest and completely insignificant, small. Or sometimes I was playing with her when frisky, I learned I could reach through the back support of a wooden chair or over the ledge of the bed at her and she'd play by attempting to grab me repeatedly.
I've also never even yelled at her, not raising my voice too much when trying to train her to stay off the kitchen counter. Also never accidentally injured her, stepped on her, due to my high level of awareness and perception.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 11:17 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSI've been extremely isolated and out of school for a long long time. Definitely unnerves me, I hate being around other people. I literally became a hiki. It's been 5 years since I've really spent time around other people more than for an hour a week or month. Even before that, I really never spoke to nearly anyone except the psychologist I was required to meet with. And of course high school before that.
I've thought of the best strategy I could create using my extreme end of human variation hyper-systemizing aspie power and extreme memory storage to draw from, with no interference from irrational human emotions. The aspie memory storage contains a vast amount of data on the general subject of humanity itself, from a far superior source to inane and obsolete IRL interactions, but books, research papers! Human nature, human psychology. Their evolutionary roots, what they truly are at their core, evil. Gender, race, body language, facial expressions, vocal intonations, personality traits, the extreme ability to analyze others, think many steps ahead, manipulate them, outwit them, understand them, able to accurately predict their behavior and easily know what their point of view is, how it would feel like to be them and react, due to my extreme end of human variation hyper-systemized model of the entirety of what man is, giving me near-total understanding, an intuitive sense now. I have seen confirmation of this power IRL and can replay the scenes at perfect quality, as if they were actually occurring, when I am deep thought, practically a near-instantaneous meditative state. It's and eidetic memory, which of course you weren't aware of: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eidetic_memory
For example, the one time I got the courage to finally try marijuana by first using a delivery service, ordering it away from other people, in SF. I saw the driver park on the south east corner of a street to the left from me, a block away by the intersection. I saw the driver moving quickly and running toward here, which told me he was likely afraid of the police because he was Black (According to professional statistical analysis, very likely to carry a weapon, hard drugs, or have some other reason they wouldn't want a cop stopping them.), so I knew, with this power, that on the way back he would also be in a hurry, and likely wouldn't want to stay in one place too long. I had already payed online, so I just had to receive it, but I also handed him a tip, which he seemed to appreciate. He then ran back, as predicted. And just as he rounded the corner a street away, multiple police cars came by where he was before.
Alright, all that said, in order to understand that my plans are extremely likely to be correct, I'll play a variation of devil's advocate by listening to your opinions.
Do you guys think it would be a good idea to piss my pants on the first day of school?
This sounds like a joke, but strict adherence to rationality means that your personal emotions must be set aside for the moment and the answers you arrive at may horror the average person, such as antinatalism, even seem insane to the small minded fools, low quality "people", but truth is truth. Of course I'm not making the flaw of not including the utility of emotional states in my analysis. I have already proven that the reasoning is impeccable.
My thoughts are that the initial incident, and something embarrassing like that probably happens to at least one or two people in every class, anything I do afterwards will never close to being as awkward as the initial incident. So, relative to that perception, for a relatively small initial cost, when viewed from the total time it affected me, but, naturally having no emotional reaction, which I trained myself to keep suppressed at all times except when viewing anime, there will be no emotional cost to me, the negative utility becomes even smaller, the wetness also not particularly bothering me, no sense of humiliation at any time, knowing I'm essentially hacking the human reality, I'd feel happy knowing I achieved this. And of course people would forget and wouldn't really care. It's a good college, people should be more mature than the standard commoner.
I cannot see any flaw in this. It's pure rational analysis, which must always be adhered to. Truth must be sought. I will welcome any opposing viewpoints, but I am currently convinced the plan will work flawlessly.
This plan was powered and created by the superiority of the optimal Asperger's brain.
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-11T12:05:45.704747+00:00The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 11:12 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSBanana Monkey Fuck!
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-11T11:17:27.882104+00:00The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 11:55 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS"Nothing else can be stated as the aim of our existence except the knowledge that it would be better for us not to exist.” - Arthur Schopenhauer, The World as Will and Representation p. 605.
By god that's a badass quote. Tattooes never appealed to me because I couldn't think of anything that a tattoo would be able to represent that could really portray something I'd feel satisfied with. Even just core parts of myself, particularly important beliefs, something to represent it, literally absolutely nothing has ever come to mind in 27 years until this moment.
Well, I'm going to start by ordering a custom shirt made on Etsy or wherever is best. Not sure I would want people asking about the tattoo, it would probably either be pretty awkward or annoying. A tattoo is just different, gruff, lower in classiness. Hmm, maybe I'm biased by the aesthetics and the association; I do feel that I very well may be. Do I accept that the effects of others are an unavoidable part of reality and will essentially limit my freedom express myself, even clothe myself, the choices ultimately being made by the tyranny of the others?The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 9:13 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by hydromorphone My dogs, who I fucking wanted to make sure were still okay, and not just abandoned. That's the family I am referring to, not actual people. He knew I thought of them as kin, but refused to show me any respect there… he would say shit on purpose just to hurt me when he'd say shit.. it's like saying shit about children, really. Calling them stupid, worthless, and all sorts of unnecessary shit. God forbid I critic anyone of his family on shit he would bitch about with them….
Oh shit, sorry about that. I didn't know you call your dogs your family.
I've always considered Ash, the stray cat I gained the trust of, my friend. I don't like the term pet, I don't consider myself to own her and don't treat her that way. She has a right to personal autonomy and doesn't owe me for food, water, shelter, warmth, being nice to her, or anything. I voluntarily allowed her into my home because I enjoy her company greatly, after such a length of isolation sometimes it just feels cool that there's another sentient being near you, that you can observe and interact with. I consider the 3 other semi-ferals that come by for food, Bella's family (All are past independent age.)The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 5:52 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSI just had a really funny thought after reading this post:
Originally posted by sploo nobody ever says i am :(
Even if sploo does genuinely have a 155 IQ
#1) No one will ever believe him.
#2) They'll rapidly realize what a psychotic, severely mentally ill, dysfunctional, unproductive, unremarkable little shit he is. That he has and provides absolutely nothing of value, has accomplished not a single thing of worth, demonstrates no signs of genuine high intelligence, and is incapable of actually putting it toward good use, rendering it useless, good for nothing but maintaining his delusional sense of self-worth and potential.
Originally posted by 霍比特人 But you're majoring in philosophy
Might as well get an AA.
What? Do you know anything about academic philosophy? Of course you don't, you don't even an amateur level understanding through independent reading.
Stop embarrassing yourself, §m£ÂgØL.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-11 at 8:36 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by hydromorphone should have seen that when you'd talk shit about my family, to which I'd never, fucking ever spoke disrespectful about your family, despite me seeing things I thought were wrong about them, as angry as I got then, but hey… you'd fucking go on and on about my family, my fucking pack with insults.
Hydro, to be fair, you literally used to talk shit and complain about your family all the time in the past. They seemed pretty horrible and destructive, other than your father, the way you used to describe them in your long rants.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-07-10 at 10:31 PM UTC in made some poppy seed tea today
Originally posted by 霍比特人 Where is your source? I also said nothing about seizures. You haven't said anything which refutes what I've said.
Originally posted by 霍比特人 T-PAIN is fucking stupid to abuse because of its serotonergic action and could potentially be why you have seizures. Abusing a (functionally) SSRE is NOT a good idea.
Sit your ass down little boy!The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!