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Posts by cerakote

  1. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by anra wow, my monkeys all retarded!

    stop letting your monkey drink tap water

    wait, you were insinuating that i am the aforementioned monkey, werent you? oh, you little rascal! i dont drink tap water, i only drink lean
  2. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by 10 Ft. Ganja Plant you are totally bragging

    no dude im not bragging im stunting you fr*cking IDIOT
  3. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Narc i wish that was even my 2000th worst day ever

    are you trying to >imply that my idea of a shitty day is having vehicle troubles? if so, then let me clarify: the issue wasn't that my truck shit the bed and i had to fix something, it was the manner in which the bed was shat in and the time i wasted putting in a part that was supposed to be in working order but was actually broken. i couldve spent that time doing something useful like acquiring wealth or masturbating
  4. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by hydromorphone OMG, this is every fucking time I have ever doe anything on a vehicle… or every father on Christmas eve trying to put together a bike/swing set/assembly required item. There are chinks in china just laughing away that they didn't include that one bolt/screw/part fitting necessary for it to go together properly. I truly believe this is done on purpose.

    well the radiator would've been upwards of $180 to replace but since i got that yung warranty the only thing i spent was too much of my time putting them shits in and taking them out. that one fitting that was missing from the bag was because the guy saw the bag had a hole in it, eyeballed it and assumed they were all there, and taped it shut. fucking guy had a stick up his ass too... when we went back up there after bringing back the shitty one he started copping an attitude with an "ohmigawd what do you want now" look on his face and when we explained that he fucked up he dropped the bitch shit real quick.



    Originally posted by benny vader i normally tow my second car along long journeys just to be safe.

    i realize youre trying to be funny but all of that stays behind the seat in the cab of my truck or under the hood. a gallon of 50/50, a gallon of water, a bottle of transmission fluid, and a bottle of brake fluid fit just fine on the drivers side of the subwoofer. got a fire extinguisher, a 4way, a small broom thing, and some other misc shit on the passenger side and again there's plenty of room to store more shit. got a funnel under the hood in between some fluid reservoirs with a bottle of power steering fluid inside of it and another bottle of motor oil right next to it. it sounds like alot of stuff to have in your vehicle purely for emergencies, but seeing as it cant get in my or any passenger's way, doesnt take up space since its all behind the seat, and could potentially unfuck a situation there is no reason not to have it. what else am i gonna put back there? its not readily accessible while driving...

    maybe the fact i have a set of cables under the seat will trigger you even more xddd



    Originally posted by NARCassist sounds like you've had a pretty sweet life dude

    at least i missed a day of school
  5. cerakote African Astronaut
    cerakotes my name and pimpin hoes is my game
    still stackin, gun packin, aint a damn thang changed
    'cept the wheels on my range, rims as icy as my chain
    know i dont rep no gang though im known to slang cane

    bendin corners on chrome, dimes givin me dome
    yeah the west is wild but h-town is my home
    im king of being trill, diamonds all on my throne
    need an all white brick? aint shit, just hit my phone

    you rappers beats go hard, but mine, they go harder
    than the shaft of my dick when im fuckin on ya daughter
    bitch please, no emcee is safe from the slaughter
    get rich quick with that brick, im chef ramsay with the water

    flow smoother than silk satin, ridin' dirty in the wagon
    jedieled up like a sheikh, street smarter than aladdin
    in a candy red slab blowin fire like a dragon
    breaded up like fort knox but you'll never hear me braggin
  6. cerakote African Astronaut
    well im not retarded, clinical retardation is defined as being impaired because of a neurodevelopmental disorder. the brain lesions that were caused by my skull being fucky arent because of goofy neurodevelopment, instead of having a brain that was borked from the get go something (mong skull in this case) borked part of it but it developed correctly. its like if you break someones femur and set the cast at an angle; that nigger wasnt born with kangaroo legs, something happened after full bone formation to make it like that.
  7. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sophie Not it.

    epic dude FUCKING EPIC UPVOTED EX DEE
  8. cerakote African Astronaut
    you guys i am so happy right now i am about to have the best meth fapping session in recorded human history
  9. cerakote African Astronaut
    the cranial irregularities i have run laterally along the parietal lobe, fanning outward in a slight arc like a trident. the region of the parietal lobe immediately affected by those cranial deformations is that of the somatosensory cortex, the primary somatosensory cortex in particular. the right side of it was affected by the cranial depressions than the left, which at first glace may explain why i have a preference for my left side for certain actions. also, because of the increased damage to the right hemisphere, i dont perceive stimuli or notice as much on the left side of my body, which might be why ive conditioned my cat to sleep against my left arm and why i have my 2nd monitor to the right of my primary.

    oh. OH. the wikipedia rabbit hole has led me to something called gerstmann syndrome. its caused by lesions in the dominant parietal hemisphere, and since im a leftie, the damage is on the right hemisphere. however, i dont exhibit all 4 of the main symptoms of it, which leads me to believe that the ones i do have are a result of lesions in the area, but clearly are not of the same severity, hence me not having all of the symptoms of gerstmann. i definitely experience the dyscalculia, but its particularly prominent in subjects like geometry and other courses that deal with spatial reasoning (i failed the shit out of geometry). one of the other main symptoms is difficulty discerning left from right, which i dont have a problem with the discernment of in my own body, but do experience when trying to process spatial manipulation. for example, when i went to put my tie on for my interview earlier, i was following an infographic on tying an oriental knot, which is a simplification of the windsor. trying to follow video guides for the windsor knot is fucking impossible for me, and i always end up flubbing it. even with the oriental knot, which is pretty simple, i had to stop for a second and try to walk through the infograph from a first person perspective, which was annoying.

    as a kid and even now ive had trouble with following a set of detailed instructions involving movement, and this is reportedly caused by posterior parietal lobe damage, otherwise known as apraxia. my dad would swear up and down that it was just me not listening, despite all my protests. fuck you dad, my brain is broken.

    damage to the somatosensory system (from lesions in the somatosensory cortex) are also a cause of speech impairments, so now me saying "wasnt" wrong has an explanation.


    and this shit right here beats it all:
    "Anosognosia is a deficit of self-awareness, a condition in which a person with some disability seems unaware of its existence."

    i was telling my dad about how its almost like i have some secret mental handicap that he never told me about and that only afflicts me. now i know the reason for all of this shit. closure feels good as fuck.
  10. cerakote African Astronaut
    well yeah, and thinking back on some of my recent conversations with, say, my coworkers, i do seem to notice an occasional quizzical glint in their eye while they talk to me. from what my friend tells me, the frequency that i mouth other peoples speech appears to be directly related to how engaged i am in a conversation mentally (we would usually play and discuss hearthstone, libtard autism on snapchat "discover" stories, shitpost, etc).

    i have slight cranial deformation on the top/back of my skull, immediately past the crown of my scalp, and that may be related to it. thanks for memeing on me, malice; you have sparked my desire for nerd shit research. curse your mega autism for being overly analytical and indirectly prompting me to figure out whether or not im retarded
  11. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by mmQ lung boy

    w-what
  12. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Malice You probably had an extremely minor stroke or aneurysm that caused apoptosis in a critical neurological region related to language, causing this very specific quirk due to how contained it was to the critical region that produces it, the extremely small and limited severity of the stroke-aneurysm.

    It very well could worsen with time or be permanent. Even if not permanent, it could take years to recover.

    well, i have similar errors (didnt = dudnt) and until i heard audio playback of the related words i never noticed that i pronounce them incorrectly. as far as i know, ive been saying it wrong my whole life. to my knowledge nobody has ever corrected me or otherwise pointed it out, and i would remember the correction if not the actual event itself because of how specific/particular it is.

    speaking of which, a friend pointed out that i mouth the words people say to me (in direct conversation) in certain situations. i guess you can call it nonverbal echolalia? (edit: maybe the correct term is echopraxia, since the repetition is of the other persons lip movements?) before that instance, nobody ever pointed that out to me either.

    both of those things are common in people with tourette's syndrome and other tic disorders, and after a bit of introspection i noticed that i do have a few motor tics, namely moving the big toe on my left foot downwards (the entire toe, not just curling it), clenching my hands and toes, popping my knuckles, and probably others that im overlooking at the moment.

    huh, it seems i could very well have some kind of mild motor tic disorder. i say mild because none of the movements are particularly exaggerated or pronounced, and i only discovered them because i was looking for them. i dont have any verbal tics, nor do i make the outbursts associated with tourettes, so if i do have a tic disorder at least its not a shitty one

    Post last edited by cerakote at 2017-07-25T06:25:31.572806+00:00
  13. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Needledick_Needledick_Needledick Report it to store staff? Call 911? Notning? I think I would be very caught off guard if thay happened…I guess i'd casually tell a worker.

    if its chanel, then by all means oui oui
  14. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by benny vader why is the max number of words arbitrarily set to 19475 ????

    who decide on this number ????

    the jedis
  15. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sophie Have some validation fam. You deserve it.

    you are a gentleman among brutes, friend! truly, this man is most charitable!
  16. cerakote African Astronaut
    recently i noticed that i do this weird speech goof where i mispronounce certain past tense verbs ending in s followed by "not" (wasnt, hasnt, etc); i replace the s with a d so instead of correctly saying wasnt i say wadnt

    is this terminal
  17. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by AngryOnion I always check my oil before a long trip.
    Ya know just to be sure I have enough.

    word of advice, keep extra bottles of all fluids in your vehicle. a gallon of water, antifreeze, power steering, etc etc. had a pretty respectable radiator leak a while back and if not for the gallon of distilled water behind my seat my shit would have been royally fucked up. ended up using the entire gallon of water just to keep it from overheating long enough to get home where i could replace it. power steering fluid cap came loose, spilled fluid everywhere which caused the serpentine belt to slip off the tensioner pulley, which broke off after flying forward because it wasnt pulled down by the belt, which punched the hole in my radiator. to top off my 1 in a million shitty luck, the new radiator (didnt cost me a dime, thanks lifetime warranty) that i installed had a hole in it out of the box, so i had to go get another one that wasnt pre-fucked. as if that werent enough, the radiator that replaced the defective one was missing a fitting in the bag, which just so happened to be the only one i needed to finish the replacement.

    i have never been pranked harder by life than i was that day
  18. cerakote African Astronaut
    when i open up this forum i always check my thanks because im a pathetic and shallow excuse of a human being that needs validation from a (you)
  19. cerakote African Astronaut
    vapes dick instead of smoking it and is clearly a health- conscious and responsible individual
  20. cerakote African Astronaut
    why does bbcode hate me i just want to post ebin meme images
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