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Thanked Posts by CASPER
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2019-03-09 at 9:52 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionLANNY ENOUGH WITH THE WORD ENHANCEMENTS I AM A MAN OF PEACE BUT I SWear to CHRIST I Will HUNT YOU DOWN AND FUCK A HOLE IN YOUR STILL BEATING HEART IF YOU DONT FIX THIS shitThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-10 at 5:03 PM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
Originally posted by Narc Its not my primary income. It just pays my rent and gives me 250 quid every fortnight, thats all. I just use it to cover essentials, I'd be living a pretty shitty existence if that was all or most of what I lived on.
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Dude....free rent and 500 a month is like 1000 a month minimum. That's HUGE. I mean ask yourself if you'd be able to survive without it? If you're anything like me, the answer is probably no, or just barely. Those are the types of things it's hard to see when we're in addiction. People as old as we are should be able to support ourselves without $1000+ of monthly government subsidy.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-08 at 6:28 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionMeth and heroinThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-13 at 5:45 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionHonestly opiate addiction in particular is just such a dead end road. You don't get anything done. You steal shit and everyone hates you. You're sick and miserable all the time. If I'd known it would be 13 years and not 2 or 4 or 5 years, there's a solid chance I'd have killed myself.
As for now though....I can't even remember why I bothered. I mean the craving sure. But when I was perfectly well and was still using...can't remember why. Barely helped anxiety. Wasted tons of money. Never got anywhere on time. In all the time I did heroin, I don't think I ever watched a movie less than 3 times.
Well if you're gonna suck dicks for dope and share needles with your son, should let me hook you up with someone. You'll get that homie hookup Costco pricing.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-09 at 5:11 AM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
Originally posted by Lanny Obviously not everyone who's ever used opiates qualifies as a "junkie" but in particular separates junkies from others in your mind? We've had and have plenty of opiate users here, most of us have probably known some in real life, one striking thing about the "junkie" label is that no matter how seriously addicted a person is or how many problems their addiction causes them, I've never seen someone seriously describe themselves as a junkie. There's always some thing that junkies do that they don't which separates them.
So what is it to you that makes someone a junkie vs. not?
Junkies don't describe themselves as junkies? Does the fact that I repeatedly refer to myself as a junkie mean I'm not?
My mom will be so happy to hear this.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-12 at 7:49 PM UTC in How are you feeling at the moment..
Originally posted by Octavian This sounds an awful lot like Malice:
https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/8mcihk/did_anyone_else_have_the_potential_to_be_very/
That's absolutely him. And it's no coincidence that he responded in his own thread (Neo-Schopenhauerian was the name I was remembering)The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-12 at 4:02 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
Originally posted by GGG Tempted to write a song about malice now. I was just thinking, "What rhymes with phenobarbital?"
Malice, man
took that diclazepam
why thank you ma'am
afghanistan
"...bought vials of mexi nembutal
Said "down the hatch!" And
"Fuck it all!"
I sure just wish the fag had called
Before he caught that bus
Because for all he whinged and cried
And sure as he was that when he died
The world would be so better off
He still was one of usThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-12 at 4:08 PM UTC in How are you feeling at the moment..Still better than most days, although tbh this Malice shit put a serious fucking damper on my week. That and my step-grandpa dying. And finding out that all the friends I can't get ahold of are in jail awaiting trial on serious charges.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-11 at 10:53 AM UTC in When your appetite is being suppressed by psychostimulants...
Originally posted by Grylls so your body just threw all the negative effects at you and no euphoria
I mean I might've slept through the euphoria. I still jerked off like 25 times in that 3 day span (which is totally uncharacteristic of me), so there was something going on, but if I could've chosen to press a button and make it stop at any time, I def would've.
User was banned for saying the taboo phrase "button"!The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-11 at 10:46 AM UTC in BDSMI would've said I was very "vanilla", until I met a girl who wanted me to choke her, burn her with cigarettes, hold knives to her neck, (unloaded) guns to her head. I still can't do any of that without permission and feel good about it, but ever since then, whenever I'm talking with or dating a girl and she does something to make me angry, there's this little voice in my head. I was raised by a woman and always deferred to women, so I'm sure it's some psychological thing to do with "embracing your masculinity" or something. But this girl would very obviously do things to try to get a rise out of me, because I'm so laid back and easygoing. Idk if she had some kind of trauma or it was just a kink, but she seemed to like knowing that I could seriously hurt or kill her at any moment. Was def not something that was natural for me to get into, but it definitely flipped a couple switches.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-11 at 10:50 AM UTC in BDSMShe was also into suspensions and bondage, but not any of the comfortable stuff you'd buy at a sex shop. She liked this really scratchy, awful hemp rope that I found somewhere. She'd want to have her wrists bound and have her arms yanked up while I had sex with her, and sometimes she'd masturbate with the rope....like pussy flossing rofl. She was such a sweet girl but she was 110 kinds of fucked up.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-11 at 10:10 AM UTC in Little girls are tight.Wouldn't that be hilarious if I actually worked for LAPD PAC DIV, but I grew up posting on totse, and now I just use it to help my creative writing and bust pedophiles?The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-10 at 5:56 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionI'm not sad. Nice day today. Trying to get together pay stubs so I can get a poor people discount at the gym. Hoping that girl will pull her head out of her ass and text me, but if she doesn't I'm cool with that too. Can't wait to get back to school.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-10 at 12:55 PM UTC in What are you doing at the moment
Originally posted by Octavian In the end the white picket fence option is worth it man. This isn't to say you can't have a little side earner. In relation to Casper's previous post about cutting "social fat", I'm starting more and more to warm to this idea except my analogy would be amputating the gangrenous tissue before it spreads, e.g. those around me that are less ambitious or a hindrance to my improvement. I've spent so much time in the presence of ass holes that need chemicals to socialize it's become somewhat normal and highly detrimental to both my health and finances. Unlike them I always have a way to procure more and more but I'm only just supplementing their own habits and parasitical behaviour to be around me.
Then I close my eyes and think, I could have invited the girl next door who only drinks, have good intellectual conversation, get extremely drunk and have wild sex. I would wake up in the morning a little hungover but I would have no regrets, not be depressed as fuck; and would have probably saved a fuck ton of money.
This is not saying I don't enjoy chemicals, I really do. It just feels like a repetitive cycle and I don't want to be the guy who's still wearing the t shirt.
Ditto.
Drugs weren't the problem in and of themselves. They just seem to put me in a stasis where it's so easy to lose time. When I thought I was stupid and useless and fucked up, it didn't really make any difference to me. Now that I know "I" am still here, and that I'm still good at a lot of things, I feel like I don't want to waste any more time. I stopped talking to friends I've known for 15 years. I just want to constantly be moving forward...even if it's just a tiny bit at a time. I want the people around me to do well too, and I want them to reciprocate the energy and time I give them. Case in point...the girl I've been talking to for a year and a half or so. She's got multiple degrees in chemistry and literature, she's got good taste and she's a musician and actress, model. She's nerdy and kind of quiet. But she's also rich and spoiled. She flakes on commitments, and then plays the victim card when someone calls her on it. She only really puts in effort when she thinks she's being ignored or disliked....which is a completely fucked cycle to get into. I basically told her that I might have put up with that shit when I was sad and mopey and strung out, but now that i feel good and revitalized, I'm completely ambivalent. I genuinely hope she does well, and I'd love to spend time with her, but if she doesn't get her shit together, I'm just going to cut off all contact. I want people around me that make me feel good, and where I can be myself, and work towards great new shit. -
2019-03-08 at 5:56 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: I'm Leaving Forever EditionContribution.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-09 at 10:26 PM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
Originally posted by Narc Who's fault is that? If it weren't for prohibition your nephew would still be alive now, waking up in the morning, having a quick hit before having a shower and some brekkie then starting his day going off to his job or business. Then at the end of the day and weekends prolly coming home to spend some family time chilling with you all or going out with some pals. May have even had a wife and kids of his own. I guess prohibition has robbed your family of a hell of a lot.
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Narc....my dude. I see you rationalizing your drug use so much. Idk what else you have going on, but do you really think your life hasn't been affected? How many years have you been doing this song and dance now? What do you have to show for any of it? I don't say any of this to try to bash you, but I genuinely know how distorted things get when your brain chemistry being normal is dependent on opiates. The things that finally clicked for me, was that it's a complete dead end road. Opiates never "enriched" my life. They just made it so I didn't want to kill myself for a few hours. I always acknowledged the fact that eventually I'd have to kick heroin and get on with my life. But how many more years are you going to put in. Maybe I just didn't have the dedication, but there was no gold watch at year 10, or anywhere thereafter.
I just see you justifying all the time. And it's weird. No one on this site isn't an addict to something or other.
What has society done for you? Well....you have running water, I assume- that's relatively safe to drink. A place to get food so you don't have to chase it down and kill it. A place to live out of the cold. Medical care when a shot misses and goes accessed. Lights to read by and internet to talk to fellow ne'er do wells across the globe.
It's a complete cop out to say that. Everything we take for granted is there because someone else put in the effort. Sitting in my room every day getting high wasn't just me in a "state of nature, maaaaan". The world goes on around us, and the only reason we're still alive is because someone else did that heavy lifting.
Doesn't mean you need to need to need to make some radical change tomorrow, but at least acknowledge that other people are out being productive, while I'd wager the vast majority of long term drug addicts are not.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-10 at 12:08 AM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
Originally posted by GGG Says the guy who drives on roads, shops at grocery stores, and enjoys having consistently running water/electricity.
"western civilization is shit just smoke dope"
You're just another slum retard.
I didn't read this, but yeah. Pretty much that. Even if we pay for it, all of those things exist by someone else's labor. God knows if I had to run pressurized water lines from the ocean to a desalinization plant, to my house, I'd be cursing and shoveling turds out of the toilet bowl every few hours because I didn't consider the fact that the drainage lines need a slight downward gradient to allow them to flow properly....or something.
We take a ton for granted. -
2019-03-06 at 9:19 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Sploo Needs Attention
Originally posted by DietPiano Greateful for all the big shit that's happened to me.
No police raid-> no rehab
No rehab/breakthorugh -> no development
No development-> no life worth living
Exactly. Even one moment living life with purpose, honesty, openness, enthusiasm, gratitude, etc-
Is worth all those years of struggle and sadness, anger and aimlessness.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-06 at 8:59 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Sploo Needs Attention
Originally posted by GGG I feel like the majority of us are normal drug using weirdos. Then there's the few who are just genuinely shitty people and are violent/abusive.
The more I learn about myself and life, I realize that everyone I know is addicted to something or other. Some people it's love. Some people it's cigarettes. Some people it's pride or money or accolades. Some it happens to be opiates or cocaine. But I don't need to feel like a lost a chunk of my life. Addiction isn't inherently negative. It's can be the cocoon, a gestational period. If I go on to live a more balanced, accepting, full experience...then it actually was worth it.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-05 at 4:03 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Sploo Needs AttentionThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
