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Posts by Item 9

  1. Item 9 African Astronaut
    ...AND it was only 6 days ago, same dose so not even full 100%, and when i took just 3 ETIZ with this shit, i was like "these tabs are weak" and fell asleep in hours easily
  2. Item 9 African Astronaut
    oh, and my muscles ache and i cant get comfortable. This is when I might have to piss myself again
  3. Item 9 African Astronaut
    I couldn't give a flying fuck hiw cool shit looks when I feel SO restless, SO hungover but im not, Like Im having a fucking stroke or some shit, FUCK THUS SHIT
  4. Item 9 African Astronaut
    Still bettern'a gay ass smart car.
  5. Item 9 African Astronaut
    Thats gotta be the most ultimate evil villians plan: because if you could, the world would be yours, everything, and lets say you could allow any individuals you want to spare to not die. You'd probably need to let a few thousand people live to run some oil refineries and power plants and shit.
  6. Item 9 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by WE SMOOTH -Mom was being a bitch (to her 30 year old son)
    -Decided to ditch work for a drunken countryside drive
    -Took a turn too fast
    -Ended up in some brush
    -Immediately is called into the police (LOL you should have taken pics)
    -…Opens a beer on the side of the road?
    -You're getting billed for the ambulance, nigga
    -5 hours at the hospital
    -Cried to the doctor
    -Is prescribed 20x 5mg Valium
    -Has to pay ~$5k for 20 Valium
    -LOL you're gonna take like 2 yrs probation over a month in jail coming of age experience.


    Oh Actor, this is hilarious if true

    This made me laugh and cry at the same time.
  7. Item 9 African Astronaut
    *says some more*
  8. Item 9 African Astronaut
    There are a couple of saving graces:

    -The car isn't damaged

    -Not a single piece property was damaged so no restitution to pay

    -didnt injure or kill anyone

    -This is gonna make me give up drinking, because theres no way to be certain it won't happen again unless I just don't

    -There is a chance I might luck out not have been "super drunk" but I'm not getting my hopes up.

    -it'll all be over with and behind me in like 2 years, maybe less.
  9. Item 9 African Astronaut
    I'm never drinking again
  10. Item 9 African Astronaut
    Sadly, this ain't a troll. But I ain't kill myself, I'm just gonna see what happens.
  11. Item 9 African Astronaut
    Well guys, I got my first DUI today... mom was being a bitch etc and I endeded up ditching work, amd then decided to go for a nice peacefull drive out through the countyside...but i was drunk and took a turn too fast and ended up in some brush on the side then of the road and couldn't get out. Some dude showed up on the phone with the cops (he wasn't being a dick or anything, just causually calling it in) and at that point I knew I was fucked so I took out a beer from the bag and started drinking it right there while waiting for the the cops to show up. I ended up being taken away in an amnulance (?) then was in a stupid hospital room for like 5 hours. They took a blood sample & shit, and it was above the amount that im gonna get chaged for "super drunk" driving. Sucks to be me right now I guess.

    I might have to do a month or 2 or jail for this but meh, whatever, I cant take rotting away washing dishes much longer anyways. Also, I got prescribed some valium out of the deal 👍💩
  12. Item 9 African Astronaut
    *facepalms and edit-deletes post*
  13. Item 9 African Astronaut
    That aint funny, asshole
  14. Item 9 African Astronaut
    It doesn't matter how much fuckin money I save up, even after ten lifetimes i''ll never be able to afford that sweet expensive shit, if I can't have any of that sweet expensive shit or be that rich then I don't want to live be because whats the point? I'm not gonna rot here on this planet being poor and not able to help amyone with all the horror and bullshit going on around I can't take it. I cant take having to go gay ass work busting my ass and still not being able to afford anything good, because life is bullshit and i'm gonna kill myself.

    You guys are the only ones I can tell without being institutialsed.
  15. Item 9 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by D4NG0 What do you think happens after death that will be better than your existence now?

    Hopefully absolutely nothingness, but of course there is probably gonna be more bullshit after we die.
  16. Item 9 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by D4NG0 I'm tentativly going to say, "That's sweet of you" while fully expecting YOU FAGGOTS I WAS TROLLING.

    NiS ftw.



    Originally posted by D4NG0 I'm tentativly going to say, "That's sweet of you" while fully expecting YOU FAGGOTS I WAS TROLLING.

    NiS ftw.

    i'm not, im serioisly considering killijg mhself
  17. Item 9 African Astronaut
    i'm not, im serioisly considering killijg mhself
  18. Item 9 African Astronaut
    I seriously love each and every one one you. As much as this world sucks and we have have to rot here, at least we ain't gotta rot here alone... I Love You All.
  19. Item 9 African Astronaut
    You shitfuckers on this site are the only people who care about me besides myself
  20. Item 9 African Astronaut
    ^ because there are too many pieces or shit roaming free in this country who have no business even being alive let alone living amoung us. Plus it's be so easy to kill myself and leave this world forever so why the fuck not ?
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