Posts by The Self Taught Man

1. 2015-12-19 at 1:32 AM UTC in I wonder what my cat would do if I pissed on it
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   Don't piss on your cat, asshole.

   This
   
   

   I remember as a kid in my early teens, my friends and I would trap neighbors cats underneath milk crates and then piss on them. Then when we were done, we'd let the cat go, so it could go back to/inside the owners house, where they would pet it, and possibly kiss its head, like so many cat owners do, except not realizing we just soaked their cat with our piss. LOL
   
   Why? …because we could, and it was sorta funny.

   
   But this is fucking hilarious.
2. 2015-12-19 at 1:32 AM UTC in Hard work or Smart work - Which is important?
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   I often hear people distinguish between the two, and it's worrying to me that working 'smart' and 'hard' might be perceived as mutually exclusive. I don't think I've heard somebody who came from little describe their experience in this way.

   
   This. Ive only heard unsuccessful people tell me to work smarter not harder. I would think it be best practice to maximize ability by working hard and smart.
3. 2015-12-19 at 12:35 AM UTC in What would it be like to walk around manhattan shitfaced?
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   Actor? Please don't drink so much. How about never drink 2 days in a row?….just to have a start

   
   I used to follow that rule.
   
4. 2015-12-19 at 12:28 AM UTC in I wonder what my cat would do if I pissed on it
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   ...or wiped my semen on it.
5. 2015-12-18 at 11:19 PM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   I know but knowing my luck and year it did. It will just be a coincidence but cant help but feel like it might be a little to do with that. Poor girl.
6. 2015-12-18 at 6:57 PM UTC in What would it be like to walk around manhattan shitfaced?
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   are you in NY?

   
   no
7. 2015-12-18 at 5:45 PM UTC in I just had the best drug lol of my life
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   I see soe black kids in the grocery store
   
   "Hey kids, you want some cough syrup?"
   
   "Nah, you drinkin' cough syrup?"
   
   "Hell yeah, shit's delicious."
   
   "Shit's delicious, he says"
   
   SHare if you laffed thank if you cried
8. 2015-12-18 at 2:51 PM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Oh and that chick i met from CL who turned out to be pregnant, a day or 2 after we met up and smoked quite a lot of weed she miscarried. I'm not sure if it was coincidental or if smoking quite a bit had something to do with it....
9. 2015-12-18 at 2:20 PM UTC in My body-- this is a good song
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
10. 2015-12-18 at 11:40 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    Another crackhead bites the dust, an ambulance was here again this morning.
11. 2015-12-18 at 11:01 AM UTC in I absolutely crave attention?
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    Why couldn't I be a girl?
12. 2015-12-18 at 5:50 AM UTC in Dear Lanny
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    If you said that to someone in real life they would punch you in the face
13. 2015-12-18 at 5:06 AM UTC in ATTN: malice
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    depression is 10/10 fun, would have again.
14. 2015-12-18 at 4:55 AM UTC in ATTN: Spectral
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    It would be kinda cool if there was some form of tourettes that made you compulsively shitpost
15. 2015-12-18 at 4:31 AM UTC in Dear Lanny
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    Are you on drugs m8
16. 2015-12-18 at 4:18 AM UTC in ATTN: malice
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Thank you for giving some thought to my life.
    
    I agree, as I said in the post, I've come to the point where I know where everything went wrong, but I'm still here, the damage has been done, I've still trapped in a biological vessel with natural responses, physical limitations, and in an absolutely nightmarish state, the worst to try work my way out of this from. My writing can give an inaccurate impression, I've literally crippled myself. You should picture someone who's half-way to being bedridden. I was really displaying every symptom of severe depression and social isolation to an extreme degree, propped up by drugs and other interventions, a perfected exercise and diet regimen, until I fell apart and even that wasn't enough. I just had the worst predispositions/traits/behaviors/habits, mentality, the environment I was in, and lifestyle. Overwhelming guilt and regret once I finally realized my mistakes, what went wrong, how I would never get those years of my life back.
    
    Appointment with psychiatrist in 6 days. Unfortunately I genuinely seem to have seasonal affective disorder, which I've noticed has regularly before, in retrospect, which is in full swing now and just made things worse. I think the same thing happened last year around this time, which led me to being fearful enough to finally start my intrarectal parnate + NSI-189 plan, which was enough to keep me going. Not an exaggeration of melodrama, imagine getting to the point where you're so depressed it's permeated every aspect of your being, you can't function, it's gone beyond numbness and anhedonia where it genuinely feels painful to be alive, you're ruminating on thoughts of suicide every hour, depressive repeating thoughts about a wide variety of philosophical/existential concepts, mostly centered around death, negative aspects of life, where you at times you consider calling 911 or walking into an emergency ward, a crisis center, and asking to be admitted because you're afraid of leaving yourself alone and want something to change.
    
    If they recommend I be hospitalized, I may agree just to break up the monotony in my life, so I won't have to be alone, and may derive some benefits from it, despite the flaws; or some other program for people in my situation, if they have it. I think I had just given up on life and was living like I was waiting to die since this year began, but just accepted once and for all that I couldn't keep living like this, I needed to ask for help or I was going to die. I accepted that nothing was going to change until I accepted the need for people in my life, begin to work through the immense internal resistance that had built up over a decade, and deal primarily with my extreme depression and anxiety via the most effective treatments available, begin some sort of rehabilitation program if possible.

    
    Bro you're on like 70 different antidepressants, unless you got out of that "take every noot" phase. I bet you'll go through withdrawals while hospitalized which would be fun.
17. 2015-12-18 at 4:15 AM UTC in Dear Lanny
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    How do you feel about being a dad?
18. 2015-12-18 at 1:52 AM UTC in I dont wanna have a kid cause what if it died or something...
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    hahaha
19. 2015-12-18 at 1:48 AM UTC in Are there four different species of human?
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    Decipher my psychology from this picture I just drew
    
    
20. 2015-12-18 at 12:04 AM UTC in What would it be like to walk around manhattan shitfaced?
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    are you in NY?