2018-09-08 at 9:45 AM UTC
in
drunk Bill Krozby-posting
you'll be right back baby believe me its only a matter of ti-- TIOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME
so I went downtown with my friend and her boyfriend Samuel and we were doing a bunch of things and then we were walking along and we found a guy laying on the ground with a person on top of him who was his cousin and she was like help help ya know and we were like ok ya know lets stop to help so we stopped to help and shes like omg hes dying and as it turns out
he died. and i was there for his last moments, I laid beside him like a kitty cat and spoke to him and he had a faint pulse and I was like 'purrrr dude. cmon. dont die on me man.' and he was just kinda blankly staring back at me but I KNEW he KNEW i mean he could see me I know it but yeah he just was close to being dead and it was the weirdest thing I've ever done maybe, how I maintained eye contact with him while his cousin was sort of crying there too , and my friends were behind me, and there's this club right next door with a huge patio and the beats are blaring and all that just a downtown funtime scene and here I am, with this guy, and he dies.
the paramedics came eventually of course and there was fanfare what with their sirens and flashy lights, but nobody but just a few us knew what really happened to that guy. everyone else probably it was just some dude with a broken leg.
then I came home and listened to mariah carey for 4 hours XD
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2018-09-08 at 8:33 AM UTC
in
Random Thoughts
Originally posted by CandyRein
I should bake tomorrow..bake while getting baked..
*signed*
This meeting is adjourned
Side thought::
I want the truth!
You can’t handle the truth!
*bangs gavel*
Order! Order! I will have order in this courtroom!
*tokes*
Objection! Uhhh.. Uhh fucking... Leading, yeah. Shes LEADING your honor!
Shut up overruled faggot.
*approaches judges desk thing and steals gavel goes over to candy in the defendant seat and lodges it up her ass*
Order in the court!!!
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2018-09-08 at 8:04 AM UTC
in
Where is Malice?
Originally posted by Rizzo in a box
reddit was known from the very beginning to fake user discussions by the creators using sock puppets and bots.
Welcome, to the
machine.
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Haha I'll wrap you in foil like Susan Boyle, suck on my ass like I had a boil
And I do, it's true, inside of my left butt cheek so what to do?
Nigga I pop it. Let the puss stream out like nostradamus? Thst doesn't make sense like Mike Pence but the matter of the fact is the fact of the matter, unstable
Unstable able able able
Unable to write a fucking a fable about Cain and Abel.
Where's my record label? Can't afford basic cable. Wish I was a horse and fucking in a stable. Smash a table over your dad's email address while he's wearing a dress addressing the wearing of dresses, youre all fucking messes ND I hate you, etc
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Originally posted by tee hee hee
That sucks. Nice shoes tho :)
Speaking of nice shoes..
Wanna fuck?
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2018-09-07 at 2:22 AM UTC
in
Nobody cares about ANN
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Originally posted by jedi_darryl
Find a boyfriend, get married the next day. Tell him you're pregnant and let him deal with all your problems afterwards. When it is finally fixed, file for a divorce. Now your curse is transferred. Boom.
Tell me about your upbringing.
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2018-09-07 at 3:49 AM UTC
in
ATTN: CandyRein
Candy is a good girl, thst doesn't seem unclear to most sane people.
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Originally posted by Technologist
Well if that’s the case, I’ll stick with my stupidity!
You don't have a choice anyway.
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Originally posted by RisiR †
Why do you faggots care about a TV commercial or kneeling niggers? Serious question. What's the big fuzz about it?
Everyone loves to be offended sometimes. Everyone also loves to make fun of people who get offended. So I don't know, I just like the fact that this one black man is pissing off millions of weahk huwhytes- their outrage bringing far greater attention to his cause then ever would've been if they'd simply brushed it off.
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2018-09-06 at 5:39 PM UTC
in
hey guise lets be real
What it is
What it do
What it ain't
What is you
What it was
What it be
What da bidniss is G
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Originally posted by ohfralala
Send me your laptop
I have multiple chrome books. Have one. Don't you have a ps4? Lol
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Originally posted by Sudo
When I eat harvest crunch cereal my stools come out like a body going through the wood chipper like Fargo
I used to eat handfuls of sunflower seeds, shells and all, and I'd imagine my stools were similar. Kinda like if when you don't chew a tortilla chip all the way and swallow a little piece that gets wedged in your throat and you have to slowly swallow over and over drinking waters trying to edge it down bit by bit but the spike of pain after each swallow. Kinda like that but with a dozen chips and they're reluctantly coming out your prison pocket.
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Originally posted by Ensign §m£ÂgØL
I'm going to China, not Cambodia.
Get a blowjob from her in an elevator or on an escalator and let her die naturally.
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Or anything similar looking? What a fucking stupid looking car. Of all the vehicles out there people actually decide yeah, you know, I really like how that FORRESTER looks better than ANYTHING else.
Oh, they buy for it's HIGH SAFETY RATING? Fuck you. Like there aren't a bunch of not retarded looking vehicles with high safety ratings. Who gives a fuck about high safety ratings anyway? People who drive poorly and expect to be in an accident, that's who. These are the same people sad enough to pick a Got dang SUBARU FORRESTER as their primary vehicle; a vehicle they're PROUD to drive around in public. Unreal.
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2018-09-06 at 1:06 AM UTC
in
Anal Cunt / Amy Grant
Amy Grant Heart in Motion was the first CD I ever owned I think my parents got it for me for my 5th birthday or somethin, I fucking loved her. Now I don't care. Is still alive even? I don't care.
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Learn how to not feel guilty.
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