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Posts by CASPER
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2019-03-11 at 10:28 AM UTC in Little girls are tight.
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2019-03-11 at 10:25 AM UTC in When your appetite is being suppressed by psychostimulants...
Originally posted by gadzooks With meth?
I've heard some intriguing stories about oral dosing.
Smoking is my usual go to method though.
Snorting it, though, can be pretty brutal on the teeth.
And then there's also rear-access administration. Not a lot of people end up resorting to that, but it is
Eating it lasts for fucking ever. I NEVER do stims anymore bc of my hypersensitivity n thyroid shit. But 3 or 4 months ago, I desperately needed to get some shit done. Weighed out .05- which I assumed would be roughly equivalent to a pill of adderal. Waited an hour. Nothing much. Redosed. 45 min later- nothing. Did .1 this time. Felt awake, but not noticeably. Another .1. 30 min later I dissolved another .1 into a glass of juice, and ended up falling asleep. 8 hours later I wake up and my head is pounding, heart is racing, dick is pulsing. I stare at the ceiling and grit my teeth and yell FUUUUUUUUUUUCK into a pillow. I was awake for the next 3 days. I'm pretty sure I posted about it, it was awful. Takes a while to kick in,but lasts fucking forever. -
2019-03-11 at 10:10 AM UTC in Little girls are tight.Wouldn't that be hilarious if I actually worked for LAPD PAC DIV, but I grew up posting on totse, and now I just use it to help my creative writing and bust pedophiles?
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2019-03-10 at 5:56 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionI'm not sad. Nice day today. Trying to get together pay stubs so I can get a poor people discount at the gym. Hoping that girl will pull her head out of her ass and text me, but if she doesn't I'm cool with that too. Can't wait to get back to school.
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2019-03-10 at 5:55 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionI feel like if you truly felt like nothing mattered, you'd just lay down and melt into a puddle. Most times, suicide seems like a statement.
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2019-03-10 at 5:32 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionEven if you were resigned to kill yourself, seems weird to not leave anything. After having put in all the effort to live, seems like a wasted opportunity. *shrug*
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2019-03-10 at 5:06 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionRemember when he let us believe he'd fucked the family cat?
RiP 2 a reel 1 -
2019-03-10 at 5:03 PM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
Originally posted by Narc Its not my primary income. It just pays my rent and gives me 250 quid every fortnight, thats all. I just use it to cover essentials, I'd be living a pretty shitty existence if that was all or most of what I lived on.
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Dude....free rent and 500 a month is like 1000 a month minimum. That's HUGE. I mean ask yourself if you'd be able to survive without it? If you're anything like me, the answer is probably no, or just barely. Those are the types of things it's hard to see when we're in addiction. People as old as we are should be able to support ourselves without $1000+ of monthly government subsidy. -
2019-03-10 at 4:59 PM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?Oh that's right. Inventive hustle, ill say that. But shit like that only lasts so long. At a certain point, someone is going to wonder why they're paying you ten times the price for laxative and workout supplements. Diversify, my space niggas. Invest in yourself,
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2019-03-10 at 1:48 PM UTC in Random Thoughts
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2019-03-10 at 1:24 PM UTC in What are you doing at the momentI'm now cleaning up my room since I can't sleep. Soooooo many drugs rofl. Found a 1.1 gram shard in a pile of crap in an old broken scale, and then I just found a gram or so of coke in a twisted up thin piece of plastic, then put into a grey ziploc.
Is there such thing as a junkie garage sale? Can I just charge someone 100 bucks and let them take all drug related shit in my room? Gives me an idea for a business. You know they have those meth remediation guys? They make bank. What about when a kid ODs or someone gets evicted, and the parents or landlord want it cleaned up, but don't want to be around needles and drugs? You could charge a pretty penny for that. -
2019-03-10 at 12:55 PM UTC in What are you doing at the moment
Originally posted by Octavian In the end the white picket fence option is worth it man. This isn't to say you can't have a little side earner. In relation to Casper's previous post about cutting "social fat", I'm starting more and more to warm to this idea except my analogy would be amputating the gangrenous tissue before it spreads, e.g. those around me that are less ambitious or a hindrance to my improvement. I've spent so much time in the presence of ass holes that need chemicals to socialize it's become somewhat normal and highly detrimental to both my health and finances. Unlike them I always have a way to procure more and more but I'm only just supplementing their own habits and parasitical behaviour to be around me.
Then I close my eyes and think, I could have invited the girl next door who only drinks, have good intellectual conversation, get extremely drunk and have wild sex. I would wake up in the morning a little hungover but I would have no regrets, not be depressed as fuck; and would have probably saved a fuck ton of money.
This is not saying I don't enjoy chemicals, I really do. It just feels like a repetitive cycle and I don't want to be the guy who's still wearing the t shirt.
Ditto.
Drugs weren't the problem in and of themselves. They just seem to put me in a stasis where it's so easy to lose time. When I thought I was stupid and useless and fucked up, it didn't really make any difference to me. Now that I know "I" am still here, and that I'm still good at a lot of things, I feel like I don't want to waste any more time. I stopped talking to friends I've known for 15 years. I just want to constantly be moving forward...even if it's just a tiny bit at a time. I want the people around me to do well too, and I want them to reciprocate the energy and time I give them. Case in point...the girl I've been talking to for a year and a half or so. She's got multiple degrees in chemistry and literature, she's got good taste and she's a musician and actress, model. She's nerdy and kind of quiet. But she's also rich and spoiled. She flakes on commitments, and then plays the victim card when someone calls her on it. She only really puts in effort when she thinks she's being ignored or disliked....which is a completely fucked cycle to get into. I basically told her that I might have put up with that shit when I was sad and mopey and strung out, but now that i feel good and revitalized, I'm completely ambivalent. I genuinely hope she does well, and I'd love to spend time with her, but if she doesn't get her shit together, I'm just going to cut off all contact. I want people around me that make me feel good, and where I can be myself, and work towards great new shit. -
2019-03-10 at 12:42 PM UTC in Random Thoughts
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2019-03-10 at 12:41 PM UTC in The bupropion manifestoCongrats on the relative sobriety my dude. Maybe consider not snorting your meds though. Kind of a slippery slope. Sounds like you haven't totally lobotomized yourself. Ever consider going back to school?
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2019-03-10 at 12:39 PM UTC in The bupropion manifesto
Originally posted by gadzooks Yeah, its almost TOO available.
I walked out of the safe injection site on my first visit with a literal garbage bag full of clean syringes and individually packed metal cups and plastic water packets and guase, etc.
I never used the same needle twice.
Yeah I have brown paper bags all over my room. Each one has like 200 26 gauge needles, little metal cooker cups, alcohol swabs, cottons, latex tourniquets, etc. Fortunately even with fresh rigs, my needle game is super lame. 90% of the time I'd hit muscle or immediately have a histamine reaction that would make a huge crop-circle looking raised welt 1/2 mm or so tall on my arm. I had slightly better luck on my ankle and hands, but it still took FOREVER, and blowing out a vein on your hand is so fucking painful it's unreal. For almost a week I couldn't even lightly brush the top of my left hand without shooting pain through my fingers and up to my elbow. -
2019-03-10 at 12:32 PM UTC in Random ThoughtsRofl the one dude was rockin a Venice Beach shirt. I guess he could pass for Mexican, but he needs to step up his mustache game. The Mongols were the biker gang I spent the most time with- although all the others in the area seem to think they're pussies,
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2019-03-10 at 12:27 PM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
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2019-03-10 at 12:01 PM UTC in How are you feeling at the moment..Sitting next to the toilet bc apparently questionably fresh cottage cheese doesn't mix well with vodka and Cabernet Sauvignon. Ugh.
Stomach pain woke me up out of a sound sleep at 4am. Heroin never did that shit, js, -
2019-03-10 at 11:53 AM UTC in General Chat
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2019-03-10 at 11:51 AM UTC in What are you doing at the moment
Originally posted by mmQ lol what did you think Mr. Chinaski was before?
No idea. Only exposure was pop cu,true really. Always assumed he was some Thompson- esque, drunken renegade. More and more, it just looks like he's a thoroughly unlikeable liar who lashed out at everyone because of his own inadequacy, and then wrote lengthy, angsty poems about how he was alone.i assumed he was some wizened old drunkard, putting truths to paper. Just seems like every other soused, dirty old homeless schizophrenic that I've had the displeasure to waste an afternoon with. But most unlikeable is his sense of superiority- for no particularly discernible reason, and his treatment of friends and especially women in his life -simultaneously terrible and terrified. Considering what an unlikeable old shitbird he was, he should e been grateful that any old toothless broad put his withered useless cock in her mouth.
