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Posts by CASPER
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2019-03-14 at 4:21 PM UTC in How do you take your MDMA (brownish crystalline lumps)?
Originally posted by Ghost taken from the darknet… now thats a rock!
I was just going to post and say that the only molly I've had in the last ten years was a very light colored yellowish tan crystal. Idk wtf is with the stuff in OPs post.
Yeah either goof the shit or just dump some in a water bottle and take little sips over the course of an hour or two. I always liked the latter best bc I could get the dose perfect, but last time I tried that with meth, shit got all kinds of fucked up. -
2019-03-13 at 7:36 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
Originally posted by hydromorphone You know, it just hit me that Malice REALLY is gone… like… I knew he was gone. I knew it in my heart of hearts he went through with it… like, I felt a disturbance in the force or some shit, but to KNOW, without that sliver of doubt being there, that little "maybe I'm wrong… I don't think I am, but I hope so…" really hits hard.
I was in a nursing home, not having access to WiFi for what seemed an eternity when BPHR read to me Malice's post. I immediately began crying. I nearly lost it… I knew then there was nothing I could do but I so desperately wanted to.
I don't know now that I want to "save" Malice, but I just wish I could have helped his suffering… I guess because I suffer so similarly… I wish someone would save me or just put me out of my misery.
I've learned one thing, love is really the only thing that matters. When it boils down, that's all we really want. I think that's what Malice wanted, but was too afraid to find. Hell, even for me, intimacy is a scary thing. I don't blame him. Honestly, if I had any sense, I should be just as frightened of it as he was. It hurts. It scars like no other.
I miss Malice a lot. I miss talking to him, asking him advice… the guy helped me A LOT, and I really appreciate the time he took. I wish I could have helped he 1/10th as much as he helped me even…
I've just said fuck it all, I'm just not as brave as he is. My son is going to have a good life, so that's all that matters. I wrote him a letter for when he's older and can understand. I'm going to miss him a lot. It breaks my heart, but it's for the best most likely. I finally did take the advice of the forum…
Now nothing matters… that's why I'm just going to live a life where I hopefully won't be alive too long. I at least know someone I can trust, so I won't be alone in this misery.
Too bad I fuck up the life I want, now this is what I get. This is what I deserve. I accept my fate. I'm just gonna go until I kill myself or someone on the street kills me.
You're the homie and everything, and obviously I've been there so I get it but...this is just cowardly as fuck. If you think your drug use isn't going to have a PROFOUND effect on your son, you're deluding yourself. Eventually he'll get smart enough to know why mommy keeps needles in a bag under the sink, and why mommy is always sleepy and won't play with him,or why there's dried blood in little patches on the floor. Life will be difficult. But when you had that kid, you really lost any prerogative to be a victim.
He got dragged into this world against his will, in a way less than ideal situation. He deserves a chance. When you're dead In a motel room from overdose, don't think for a minute that he won't use that pain as an excuse to follow in your footsteps. Just picture your son at 20 years old, sinking a needle into the crook of his arm. You're doing him a tremendous disservice. I mean shit my mom went to incredible lengths to raise me by herself, and I ended up being completely fucked up all the same. What chance are you giving him?
That's just the truth. -
2019-03-13 at 8:08 AM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
Originally posted by mmQ Does that work well? I guess I knew a girl that just poured her tech into water bottles and sipped on it all day. Is that the way to go?
That's the only way I've done it in the last few years. Just water and some of that fruit flavored water enhancement stuff, with like .2 mixed in. Takes a while to kick in, but sure beats the fuck out of coffee. Way less somedown than smoking or snorting, but if you're sensitive to it like I am, be careful because it'll sneak up on you and fist your dickhole. -
2019-03-13 at 5:45 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionHonestly opiate addiction in particular is just such a dead end road. You don't get anything done. You steal shit and everyone hates you. You're sick and miserable all the time. If I'd known it would be 13 years and not 2 or 4 or 5 years, there's a solid chance I'd have killed myself.
As for now though....I can't even remember why I bothered. I mean the craving sure. But when I was perfectly well and was still using...can't remember why. Barely helped anxiety. Wasted tons of money. Never got anywhere on time. In all the time I did heroin, I don't think I ever watched a movie less than 3 times.
Well if you're gonna suck dicks for dope and share needles with your son, should let me hook you up with someone. You'll get that homie hookup Costco pricing. -
2019-03-13 at 2:15 AM UTC in Where is the line between being a junkie and not?yes
fearangryenhancement -
2019-03-12 at 7:57 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
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2019-03-12 at 7:56 PM UTC in hey friends, im ready tro kill myselfOh he's better now?
Okay I'll save it for a special occasion then. -
2019-03-12 at 7:54 PM UTC in hey friends, im ready tro kill myselfIt requires proper lighting and pushing my gut sufficiently out of the way
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2019-03-12 at 7:54 PM UTC in hey friends, im ready tro kill myselfI'm trying to decide on a mahogany or felt backdrop.
On the sink in my work bathroom. -
2019-03-12 at 7:52 PM UTC in hey friends, im ready tro kill myselfLike if condoms had ads like dishwashing gloves do, I would be the dick equivalent of a hand model.
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2019-03-12 at 7:51 PM UTC in hey friends, im ready tro kill myself
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2019-03-12 at 7:49 PM UTC in How are you feeling at the moment..
Originally posted by Octavian This sounds an awful lot like Malice:
https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/8mcihk/did_anyone_else_have_the_potential_to_be_very/
That's absolutely him. And it's no coincidence that he responded in his own thread (Neo-Schopenhauerian was the name I was remembering) -
2019-03-12 at 7:18 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
Originally posted by Bipolar High Roller Middle finger on my left hand was surgically amputated because of shooting T-PAIN. It cut off circulation to my finger and it started rotting on my hand. Had to stay in the hospital for 10 days for IV antibiotics because it got infected.
Fuckin hell dude. Was that enough to snap you out of it, or you still riding the fuckin lightning? -
2019-03-12 at 7:17 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
Originally posted by DietPiano What was his reddit name? I've seen it before, something anime related I think. Malice1 was NOT Malice, we found his real avccount on there.
Using his reddit name you can find his account on Sanctionedsuicide, it's the same. Find the day he stopped posting.
Or you can sift through the bus thread, the link is in there somewhere.
Idk if I remember. I think one on Reddit was bukujutsu something, and another may have been "Schopenhaurian" or ...something. -
2019-03-12 at 7:15 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
Originally posted by DietPiano There would seriously be like, 2 people at my funeral besides my family, maybe, if I dropped dead tomorrow. So like, 2 more than at Malice's.
I ruined my reputation by posting ridiculous shit on facebook when I was on xanax and pretended I was gay a lot for no reason. fuck social media, I don't use it anymore.
"Pretending" -
2019-03-12 at 7:14 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
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2019-03-12 at 7:10 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition
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2019-03-12 at 6:07 PM UTC in OXYCODONE
Originally posted by GGG >guy who was addicted to opiates
Well yeah but the fact that it makes you feel good at first and then just slightly more normal later on down the line....is not something that I ever would've agreed to pay $200 a day for, if someone had been trying to "sell" me a product of some kind. When it was $25 once a week, and a couple tiny dabs got me all warm and happy and helped me fuck for hours at a time...that was cool.
After that though, blowing through money, dodging police, and sleeping your life away aren't super enticing. -
2019-03-12 at 6:01 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionYou should get into opera, dawg
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2019-03-12 at 5:22 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro EditionAlso, §m£ÂgØL.... now you kind of have to record Goose Pond EP.
With as much as his autistic ass talked about it, you know he would've loved that.
