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Thanked Posts by gadzooks
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2019-05-24 at 5:36 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition*skims over last couple pages*
A race and IQ debate...?
How peculiar.
I wonder if such a topic has ever been discussed on the Internet before.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-24 at 5:41 AM UTC in How are you feeling at the moment..The opposite of the opposite of sexual frustrationThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-05-23 at 8:01 PM UTC in foolproof method of murderIf you have really long arms, challenge them to Prussian roullette...
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2019-02-12 at 12:27 AM UTC in @infinityImagine having this much free time...
Also, imagine being a starving third-worlder sitting around wishing on shooting stars for a few dollars worth of resources to start a farm to feed their family, and then realizing that the first-world is busy spamming dick pics all day on an Internet forum out of sheer spite...
Now that one's a doozy.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-23 at 9:48 PM UTC in Smarter people prefer instrumental music according to study
Their results showed that people with lower intellect preferred music with lyrics, rather than complex orchestrations.
What about complex orchestrations with lyrics?
Opera niggas be like...
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2019-05-23 at 4:58 AM UTC in My girlfriend likes to spit and push cum on me.Lol what the actual fuck?
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2019-05-23 at 5:36 AM UTC in My girlfriend likes to spit and push cum on me.*sad Sarah McLachlan music starts playing*
1 in 7 NiSers are victims of forced cum spitting by their significant others.
Right now is your chance to save one of them.
For only $0.37 a day, you can improve the life of a fellow NiSer.
Call the Fona-Fone today, and make a donation to the Fona-Bank.
You can make a difference. -
2019-05-23 at 1:48 AM UTC in An Astornauts Du-ragThis is still one of my favorite threads ever.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-05-22 at 6:28 AM UTC in Your thoughts at the moment
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2019-05-22 at 1:22 AM UTC in Epic forum game, BLANK CHECKWait, how blank is TOTALLY blank?
So it's just a piece of paper the size of a check with nothing printed on it???The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-22 at 1:30 AM UTC in Epic forum game, BLANK CHECK
Originally posted by A College Professor While you are examining the totally-blank cheque ( not that i know what that word means ( in disbelief, a flash flood envelops your neighborhood with no warning, the foundation to your house has been majorly tweaked from all the rushing water. the roof collapses and you are pinned under a big heap of rubble. a big ceiling joist hit you in the head and your brain is swelling
You better cheque yourself before you wreque yourself.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-22 at 6:27 AM UTC in Your thoughts at the momentHoly fuck y'all know how to bring a party to it's knees.
Jeez.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-22 at 7:22 AM UTC in Your thoughts at the momentThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-05-22 at 4:11 AM UTC in LPT: Buy a Lamborghini - It'll pay for itself over time
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2019-05-22 at 6:37 AM UTC in Your thoughts at the moment
Originally posted by WellHung Zooks, You're one of the few people whose opinion I value around here ,and I really don't like you seeing this side of me… I think I've been making strides in a positive direction lately. and I want that to continue. but don't tell em is hell bent At savagely attacking me from now until the end of time.
I generally try not to dive directly into the line of fire when I see e-drama playing out around here, but...
I have noticed a genuine upwards trend in you lately.
And I've noticed that DTE, for whatever reason, tends to be overly negative all the time.
BUT, I imagine this rivalry between the two of you goes back a lot farther than the last few posts in this thread, so I'm not going to blindly and zealously take your side in the matter either.
I just hope that somehow you two work it out.
My personal policy when it comes to things like this is, I just start being the nice one, even in response to any vitriol coming my way.
Kill em' with kindness, basically.
If you're sincere, then eventually, the other party will stop being a dick/bitch/whatever...
And if they don't... Well, then at least you know you're not the real dick/bitch/whatever.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-22 at 4:05 AM UTC in Your thoughts at the moment
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-19 at 11:48 PM UTC in WellhungThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-05-20 at 1:18 AM UTC in Post Excuses for Missing WorkI called up an escort service, and the woman they sent over brought a gun and forced me into a dark colored cargo van. Her and three masked burly men tied me up, blind-folded me, and tossed me in the back of the van.
They then drove for about ~20 minutes, which I estimated from the fact that four and a half songs played on the radio, and I assumed each song would be about 4 minutes long.
I was buried in a shallow dugout in an unknown location.
I remember hearing one of them on the phone asking for ransom money, but I'm pretty sure they mistook me for someone else. I have barely a penny to my name.
I managed to break myself free from the restraints, and, when I saw just the right opportunity, I seized it, and pounced towards one of the kidnappers.
I took his cell phone and used it to call 911, and the police brought me to the hospital, and began questioning me.
However, I recognized the last name the inquiring detective gave me... I had overheard that same name while in the back of the van.
I remained silent for the time being... But as soon as he left the room, I hopped out of the hospital bed and booked it for the rear exit. I made my way down the street a few blocks, and then hailed a cab, and asked the driver to take me to a police precinct the next town over.
Anyway, that's why I missed work today.
I'm still at said precinct figuring shit out.
I might miss a few more days.
Just sayin'. -
2019-05-20 at 11:48 PM UTC in Life is a Royal pain in the ass...
Originally posted by WellHung Folks I just want a 100% sure fire way to off myself in a quick painless fashion… Is that too much to ask? What's 100% effective?
Okay, in the interest of harm reduction (because a botched suicide can do a lot more harm than a successful one), I am going to take your question seriously and offer some things I have thought of when in a similar state of mind.
BUT FIRST, you have to listen to me tell you why you shouldn't proceed with what you're thinking of doing.
While I'm not one of those brainwashed morons who believe that suicide is ABSOLUTELY NEVER a reasonable thing to do, I do believe that it should be a last... and I mean ABSOLUTELY LAST... resort.
Have you tried escaping modern life to live in a Buddhist monastery? How about escaping to the wilderness to try to get in touch with your evolutionary roots?
I'm also going to assume you've tried seeking professional help - both psychiatry (i.e. the medication route) and psychotherapy (i.e. the "talking therapies" - CBT, group therapy, and so on and so forth).
I'm also going to assume you've tried some basic troubleshooting to determine the ultimate source of why you feel the way you do. There are tons of different things to explore here - is it a substance (ab)use issue? Is it a social life issue? Is it loneliness? Is it a physical health issue? Etc, etc, etc...
Now, assuming you've literally exhausted all of the above areas (and, honestly, I would wager that you have not - at least not every last conceivable thing)...
Some of the ways I have considered offing myself include:
1. Combining MULTIPLE extremely fatal poisons. I would also probably take a heavy dose of heroin and some benzos so that at least my last moments of life are somewhat enjoyable.
2. Buying TWO high caliber hand guns, and shooting myself in the head from two different sides. It greatly decreases the chances of surviving with debilitating head wounds.
3. Jumping from an incredibly high point.
And, by the way, this brings me to another point...
I read somewhere that 100% of Golden Gate Bridge suicide attempt survivors regretted the decision on the way down.
If you take anything from this post, take that little bit of "trivia".
When it comes to the topic of suicide, it has been one of the most paradigm shifting things for me.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-05-19 at 11:50 PM UTC in Somebody hack into the phone systems and redirect all 911 calls to the Fona-FoneMaximum lulz will ensue.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
