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Posts That Were Thanked by Soyboy

  1. Malice Naturally Camouflaged
    LSD, you should read this if you’re interested: https://www.longecity.org/forum/topic/71485-my-wonderful-50-day-experience-with-therapeutic-doses-of-methamphetamine-desoxyn-healed-my-mind/

    There are other user reports that come up if you Google “meth microdosing”.

    Pharmaceutical D-meth, or as close as you can get to it from clandestine syntheses, taking at low oral doses (3-10mg), is very different from typical street meth use.

    I’ve posted studies before that actually demonstrate some fascinating beneficial effects at these doses, taken orally.

    Also, I don’t expect this experiment to actually work, to be enough to make life worth living, allow me to function well enough to reach my goals. I do take into account behavioral modifications, such as exercise and regular fulfilling socialization. My problems are just incredibly treatment resistant. A.utism is simply a horrendous crippling disorder that’s extremely complex and has a vast array of effects. The unfortunate reality, and this is strongly supported by a wealth of evidence, is that the vast majority of people on the a.utism spectrum never manage to succeed and have tragic lives. Even among those with college degrees the unemployment rate is an astounding 85%. There are numerous other statistics on outcomes that paint the bleakest picture.

    Being able to read well and convey yourself intelligently only shows you a tiny aspect of a person’s life.

    Bad parents, bad city/environment, bad schools, lack of diagnosis and treatment, unbelievable levels of social isolation and alienation (This has the strongest set of long term negative effects out of anything), severe chronic anxiety, severe social deficits, severe chronic depression, extremely weakened ability to experience pleasure/positive emotions, and among those on the spectrum being “high functioning” (this term is misleading because it’s simply relative to classical autism) actually increases your risk of suicide.

    I have all the factors for an extremely high lifetime risk of suicide. Bipolar disorder and schizophrenia also have very high lifetime suicide rates, and most of the factors I mentioned also increase this risk. People like PoC and Bipolar High Roller understand what living with a condition like this is like.

    It’s probably too late for me at this point in my life, I’m already 28 and the development of my brain has been permanently affected. IRL I’m not even close to coming across as high functioning as I do online.

    Then again, for people with ADD proper treatment can be profoundly life changing. Dextromethamphetamine is about as powerful a treatment as you can get.

    It’s not going to change anything about the external world, though. Other people and the world they’ve created will always be a hell to me. The only chance for a fulfilling life is to devote myself to my intellectual pursuits, before my depression reached a level of severity that destroyed me. I’m not sure I can ever return to that state due to how I’ve changed, my philosophy/worldview, how profoundly disillusioned I am. I’ve completely lost interest in the world and have lost any sense of wonder. The latter issue may be the most massive obstacle to a scholarly life. Solving problems like it’s a game/challenge just isn’t the same.

    There’s a good chance I’ll simply utilize the effects of meth to study Schopenhauer, related philosophers, and a set of books on Buddhism, as preparation for death.

    With meth therapy I may have the energy and motivation yo turn suicide into a project. An idea I have for the end is to have a continual encrypted stream, so my location won’t be discovered, where people can send me questions. The method of death would be through extreme self deprivation, slowly starving myself to death, and devoting all my time to meditation, study, and contemplation. Prior to this I would extensively document what led to this and write on various subjects.

    In a text file I started one day and abandoned, although it ended up being fairly lengthy, I speculated on why the Buddha forbade monks from recording anything. Buddhism has a fascinating history, and for the highest level of monks some practices may have reached extreme levels. I speculated that at some point some may have chosen to undergo the process I described and utilized it to convey what they learned from the most extreme point of human existence. Interestingly I later learned that this form of suicide was the only one Schopenhauer truly respected.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    one time he held me down while ate made me touch his pineal gland
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. Zanick motherfucker [my p.a. supernal goa]
    Daily's should be "White Sharia Now".
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  4. Daily an(nu)ally [dissolutely whisk the pantheon]
    I came for the textfiles and stayed for the gentiles
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  5. benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    LANNY LIKES MEN.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  6. A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
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  7. Daily an(nu)ally [dissolutely whisk the pantheon]
    HTS and sploo
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  8. Originally posted by gumbo And nothing of value was lost

    Fuck are you talking about you god damn zoklet noob. Enter was OG totse
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  9. Originally posted by Bill Krozby She told me last week when it was (i had no idea) and we are going to meet at the place we first met at a year ago. (her idea not mine)

    but anyways its good to know that we've had very few problems and like 95 percent of the time its been good. I really do love her she's my heart.

    She probably has stockholm syndrome
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  10. Originally posted by Something Squirrel >not fucking his wife

    They make me sick when I look at them. Not because of my brother because he's my brother and I love him, but it's that dog of a woman he married.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  11. RestStop Space Nigga
    I've seen this before. umhmm. Meth makes people go from "OMG I wanna die" to "Die? There's AT LEAST 500 million things I need to do before even thinking about dying!" Told ya guys. Shits fly as hell.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  12. Oh btw MORALLY SUPERIOR BEING, that cheese I tried that I liked? Couldn't figure out what it was?

    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  13. stupid noob VICTIM of farm equipment [the momentously grade-constructed phasmatodea]
    ITT: autists pat themselves on the back for being autists
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  14. Obbe Alan What? [annoy my right-angled speediness]
    Like this:

    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  15. I am off to work.
    I am ready.
    I got this.

    I do not know if I will post again today but do know I love each and every one of you and believe in you.
    Thank you all.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  16. the pat-man Tuskegee Airman [overshadow that snuff-brown nestling]
    Originally posted by MORALLY SUPERIOR BEING Just like the government I spend more thanks than I take in and run a big thanks deficit.

    It's cool though, some thanks economist told me it was really smart.

    thats right goy- i mean my fellow white man take my thanks loan at 10% apr.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    lol@ accurate pre-empt
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  18. I've never had a conversation with one that I couldn't have had with myself. I never learn anything new.

    "Hurrr mate, women aren't for having conversations, you're doing it wrong mate." Shut the FUCK UP, Narcassist.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  19. Dfg Tuskegee Airman [compulsively riposte the emigrant]
    Of the girls I bang, but I stopped since GF does't like it. Plus it gets boring after a while.

    https://imgur.com/a/4c9Po

    https://imgur.com/a/34xTq

    https://imgur.com/a/e8XJd

    https://imgur.com/a/f6Tkg


    None of the girls are recent, I used to post them on reddit. I do wish the girl I banged I took pictures of her, she had a great pussy.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  20. Originally posted by NARCassist my life isn't easy, think i should kill myself too?



    .

    I don’t think you understand where Malice is coming from. He doesn’t seem to care about external factors like how “hard” his life is. I think he just sincerely believes that life is pointless, temporary hell and that sentience is the greatest mistake of evolution. In other words his suffering is intrinsic to his consciousness. Doesn’t matter how “happy” or “successful” he becomes in life. Unless he changes his fundamental beliefs, he will always be depressed.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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