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Thanked Posts by Zanick
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2019-03-08 at 9:28 PM UTC in There is so many sexual tensionsThey would be wards of the NiS community, we will all parent them together. But realistically, Lanny will probably claim them as dependents on his taxes.
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2019-03-06 at 9:28 PM UTC in Why do we feed billions to our pet parasite Israel?They wrote that they're a chosen people but in reality, the jedis are heavily in debt to their creator, who has identified the state of Israel as the responsible party. Every instance of "prayer" in the Bible is actually a mistranslation of the word payer, which means that he has been trying to collect this debt for millennia. They have only been paying interest during this time, and soon God will begin pursuing the debt from deriviative faiths, such as Islam and Christianity, which is why religious conservatives in America feel obligated to contribute your tax dollars to the Israel situation. The Muslims don't think it's fair that they're on the hook, which is why they want to eliminate the principal payee. The Vatican can't afford it and their clergy's legal fees.
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2019-03-07 at 2:21 AM UTC in OFFICIAL Cool Kids Club registryI would like to submit my application for the Kool Kids Klub to consider, and I believe that I am uniquely qualified. My accomplishments are the following:
My life's work has been mental illness and substance abuse, and I have succeeded in making each fuel the other to enjoy a steep decline over the past several years. During this journey, I have battled zombie children in the forests and in the streets and I have slain them all. I have weaponized vehicles with benzodiazepines in what I can only describe as a revival for the sport of jousting. I have vanquished my evil sister, and I'm currently wearing her hide for warmth outside in a dumpster that I rent out to a raccoon, who pays me in garbage. Together we host a channel on a porn website that I won't disclose for sake of privacy. I don't have any answers for anybody about anything, so don't ask.
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2019-03-07 at 2:01 AM UTC in Selling my body, choose your own price and tell me what you want to do to me.
Originally posted by tee hee hee Well maybe you should have specified that in your opening post. 😞
You’re right, I should have. You can punish me if you want, free of charge, any method you like. In fact, I’ll pay you for the privilege. Just promise you’ll hurt me deep and I’ll remember you until I die, honey.
And I’ll still wash the curtains.
Originally posted by MORALLY SUPERIOR BEING V: A Cat-Girl/Boy Under Every Bed $150, I want you to live under my bed and pretend to be a cat.
You will be responsible for sourcing, cleaning and repairing your uniform, which will be as follows:
Please get back to me with your acceptance.
Offer accepted. I’m boarding a transatlantic flight as you read this post.
Originally posted by GGG How much for your bottom right premolars?
Is 30 enough?
$30 is plenty, but I’d ask that you also take the bottom left for symmetry and sew everything up when you’re finished with the extractions. When I go in to see my dentist next week, I intend to gaslight her into believing I had fewer teeth than she remembers.
Originally posted by stl1 Can you jump over an 8 foot fence?
I’ll do it in the nude, hopping on one foot. It can be lined with razor wire and/or any other traps you require. I’m not sure whether I’ll be successful, and the uncertainty is very arousing. I expect that I’ll be fully erect for the occasion. Show me the money, and this experience can be yours forever.
Originally posted by gadzooks Are organs up for grabs?
I'll take a kidney and a portion of the liver.
Organs are available while supplies last.
Originally posted by GGG Fuck gadzooks.
I'll give you 100 for the kidneys and liver.
I would’ve taken this tbh but you niggas kept going.
Originally posted by gadzooks I bid $150.
(ITT we auction off Zanick's body piece by piece).
Also an acceptable offer.
Originally posted by GGG 200.
You flatter me!
Originally posted by GGG Zanick is gonna end up considerably dismembered and disabled for less than 500 lol
No turning back tho. A man sticks to his word, and Zanick is indeed a hell of a MAN
It’s really more about the thrilling prospect of mutilation and prostitution, no dollar amount could satisfy me.
The disfigurement of my penis was an introduction into a world of excellent pain.
Originally posted by gadzooks I bid $10,000 for the whole package.
Just so I can preserve his freedom (but I will take a kidney, tho, and put that shit on ice for later).
I appreciate the generous bid and I accept, but I’d first need your assurance that I’d be free to continue with this business endeavor after my body is yours.
Originally posted by ohfralala I would like to slide a lubed banana into your anus while you breathlessly whisper Karen.
Free of charge.
I’m kind hearted and compassionate.
Originally posted by ohfralala Oh wait you’re trying to make money here. I’ll give you $200.
Offer accepted! Just don’t ask me to eat the banana. I’ll do it if you do, but I don’t like bananas.
(I would’ve done it for free but you put this in writing, and I am still an attorney in some states.)
Originally posted by mmQ I'll drop a $50 to slice off your feet with a rusty razor blade.
Deal, but you have to do something creative with them afterward or I’m donating the money to a charity that takes care of orphans.
If you fulfill your end, I’ll dress up a homeless couple and pay them to feign interest in adoption and then back out at a maximally damaging moment for the kids.
Originally posted by MORALLY SUPERIOR BEING V: A Cat-Girl/Boy Under Every Bed I want to up my offer to a can of tuna OR salmon daily.*
Also ad lib/unlimited cat nuts.
This is a sweet deal Zanny don't pass it up.
*subject to purring pleasingly when I rub your fur
What the fuck, you can’t change the terms after I get on the plane. Sorry, but I am morally obligated to refuse this offer. You were better off the first time. If you can make an offer that includes soy products, I will gladly accept.
Unfortunately, I’ve already created quite a ruckus trying to eject myself from the flight. You’ll have to wait a couple of days while I sort out the ensuing legal complications of my actions.
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2019-03-06 at 9:45 PM UTC in What are you doing at the momentMaking my second pourover today as I draw up battle plans for a military campaign.
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2019-03-07 at 7:13 AM UTC in Is there a way to find out how many of my potential offspring have been aborted?You'll have to retrace your steps. Call every abortion clinic in every city you or anybody you've met has ever been to and threaten to kill yourself unless they release to you records of the women responsible. If you have a handgun, hold it up to the phone and spin the barrel to frighten them into complying. You can find the confirmed infanticides and accost them, and then follow up with the ones who didn’t and claim their children as your bastards, regardless of whether they actually carry your genetic material. Sell them to princes, pedophiles, and evil hags and make money.
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2019-03-07 at 6:45 AM UTC in BDSMI tried choking, wasn't feeling it. I'm a nice guy and I don't like the thought of some poor girl beneath me gasping for air. I bought a rope, but I couldn't make a knot that didn't slip. Eventually, they stopped letting me near the mannequins.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-07 at 2:26 AM UTC in How long ago did you last get laid?Couldn't say, didn't take place in space/time
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2019-03-06 at 8:31 PM UTC in Does Lanny have access to all our PIIt's a tag that Lanny uses to mark subversive users in the event that he gets a subpoena. It means that my post is now 'locked' and I cannot change it to protect myself in the event of future prosecution. He has a tab on his administrator panel that brings up all such posts in a format that can be searched and indexed by a government database.
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2019-03-06 at 9:34 PM UTC in Hey Reddit! My name is GGG and I'm a conductor of electricity. AMA!The legs are shaven (top) and the pubes are neatly trimmed: clearly, he's into manscaping and wants to look good, so why not do something about the tan line? This detail has bothered me for almost 15 years.
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2019-03-06 at 8:09 PM UTC in Have you ever been homeless- story time/advice threadYou could say I was homeless often, but that would require I ever had a stable home in the first place. My mother kicked me out of our two-story, air-conditioned home several times during my adolescence. When this happened, I'd stay with my father in a similar living arrangement. Sometimes I left school not knowing if I'd be going to one comfortable home or stranded at the other. To make matters worse, my mother's house had a piano while my father's had a whirlpool bath—a terrible dilemma, I assure you. I didn't know who to love more. As you can probably imagine, these were very confusing times. I don't like to think about it. I only ever wanted a normal life.
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2019-03-06 at 3:03 AM UTC in Muh xanniezYou could have just as much fun doing that sober, druggie.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-06 at 2:50 AM UTC in Muh xanniezI have fond memories of this dạngerous combination. Make the most of it, nigga, and please report back or I'll worry.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-06 at 2:57 AM UTC in White people have never been subject to discrimination or racismI was fifteen on my first day of public school. I got off the bus and saw that at least 20% of my new classmates were black. I said to my friend, "Wow, look at all these blacks!" Several of them turned their heads and glared at me. I had never felt exposed to racial conflict before then, and I was very intimidated by the thought that they might do something violent to me. I wanted to get right back on the bus, but all the front seats were taken. Their eyes followed me from the vehicle to the door, an oppressive march which I imagine was much like what Ruby Bridges experienced, but eerily silent in a menacing way rather than simple harassment. I soon transferred to a school on the other side of town, where people are more concerned about property values.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-02-24 at 6:05 AM UTC in The Muslim world are honestly chickenshitsPeople who think their divine being can make itself home on Earth are basically the same as people who think they're better off on a continent with a crust made of ancient fecal matter. Just because they discovered it when it was genetically based, everything is much harder. When all of them are dead, I'll make others. Censoring thousands of years with a new history for our kind will be a challenge of leadership for me, but I'm confident the next speciesist monarch will be glad he has doesn't have to start from the beginning. Once more, I'll reiterate: please hasten the end, I don't have a plan for the next millennium. That's why I'm posting here.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-02-23 at 10:16 PM UTC in An announcementI am proud to declare, here in HB, before the eyes of our nation, my candidacy for the Presidency of the United States of America.
That bigger fellow who wants a wall - he hasn't posted nudes yet, and that's not okay. I would've posted nudes by this time if I were him. America should be about loving one another's bodies except for the middle-class whites, who need to stop.
We need a barrier to separate the white men from white women because every white baby born makes the other whites less valuable, it's simple economics. I will make the Mexicans build this barrier and I will pay them a living wage.
By 2025, I pledge that we will be having sex with AI, who will be superior lovers, and that by 2030 pregnancy will be the new suicide.
California will be the testing site for a policy of mandatory nudism, which will shame their people into taking better care of their bodies. When other states follow suit, it will save our country trillions on health care.
Finally, I promise you war everlasting. You're probably tired of watching it happen on the other side of the world from your television, and that's why I'm going to bring the fight to your doorstep. My first act as your President will be to import a regime of terror that I'm told is very dedicated to seeing our way of life destroyed.
I'll see you niggas on the trail. -
2019-02-23 at 7:50 AM UTC in I just commited an act of infidelity (AKA: The Other-forums-you-frequent Thread)Your concern is not unappreciated, and the truth is all of the above. I had a break from reality, my evil sister seized an opportunity to invade my mind, and you may be gullible but that isn't for me to say. I lurked for some time over the past month but I realized the community is better off with my contribution and I'm a better person for it. It's good to be back!The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-02-23 at 7:34 AM UTC in I just commited an act of infidelity (AKA: The Other-forums-you-frequent Thread)I have a dozen Reddit accounts and I post from none of them except for dick pics. Nobody there is so carcinogenic like the people here, which makes me think they're all liars.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-07-17 at 9:54 PM UTC in Ohfralala is a douchebag...She is quite beautiful indeed.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-07-16 at 3:57 PM UTC in Ohfralala is a douchebag...Few people know me better than Fralala or match her in terms of insight and kindness. I am only convinced that OP may be a douchebag.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
