2023-06-24 at 8:29 PM UTC
in
Is it just me
Do you call yourself anything differently than your name in your head? I used to always call myself Mack in my head but now it's Kafka.
Got half a mind to go to the beach tonight, depends on my energy.
Idk if I'm really mentally ill if it only comes across online. Would I be fine if the internet didn't exist?
If you ask Myers, he'll confirm I am only neurotic online. Irl I seem slow and like I'm not thinking of anything.
Now wondering if I had issues or was inspired by Christopher Pike, I had a similar writing voice and still do. I want to write happy fantasy stories but when the flow comes it's fucked up murder mystery and nothing like my normal thoughts.
Another story was about someone being mauled by a werewolf at 4am.
At least ik I got the genes to stomach Bacardi.
Alls ik for sure is I'm too overwhelmed rn, maybe something bad is happening.
Or I think I just have the same expressions on my face.
You know at the end of Midsommer when the guy's in shock about what's happening to him. That's what I'm like now but it isn't bad.
Feel like I have some mental block bcus normally the word dad would make me go down a mental train, happened with other things today, no mental trains.
This is my first time drinking Bacardi. I always avoided it because it's what my dad drank.
One story was about someone hiring a hitman to kill their mum.
I remember my teacher chastising me like "You're the type of girl who could get an A* in English but at this rate you're not even going to get a C.". It was because I never did homework and came in late every day so I missed a lot of English class. Think she only liked my creative writing. I was once on report for coming in late everyday and walking out of class sometimes, so I had to check in w a teacher everyday for a week. I did for two days then went back to my ways and they left me alone. I still wonder why.
I never forgave myself for not mentioning onomatopoeia and using Irish words, though they were in quotes. I still got a C.
Flashback to not using a single paragraph in GCSE English exam.
Actually nah I detest paragraphs. I want my writing to sound like me. My thoughts don't have breaks.
