I mean the short acting nature was the reason I started using heroin again. I was like "well if I feel sick in the morning, it means it's out of my system so really it's healthier than methadone her durr"
It was an excuse to use- plain and simple. Even full agonist opiate, taking methadone once a day, not taking more, not taking in combo with shit to try to catch a high- is the first step for me. Most of the time I used. I wasn't sick. I had enough heroin around me all the time to never have to worry about that. It was compulsive.
People's experiences with methadone seem to vary wildly, but I don't quite understand why 1mg 3 or 4 months from now should be just as bad as quitting cold turkey. Your body and brain chemistry gets a chance to adjust. I get to start working out, change my diet. I just know me. I did the whole herointaper song and dance for 13 years. Tapering with short acting opioids was almost impossible for me.
I mean I've been on methadone for roughly a year and a half. First year while I was using, then just chipping. Then not using, stable. Now I'm tapering, as of. November. I plan to finish tapering. I am working full time. I'm at 122mg, with 4mg drop every week. So I've got a few months, but I'm co ple tell fine with that. After 13 years, discontinuing everything isn't going to make me a whole lot better off than doing so in a structured manner would. Mentally, I'm a lot better than I was a year ago, but knowing what I know - that there's also a huge physiological component at play- I'm not just going to throw my body into wild chemical withdrawal and hope that the other dude in my head doesn't go fuck things up.
I get take homes now. I've never taken more than my dose. And for Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and today, I've taken 1 and 2/3 of one bottle. In a day or two I get sick, but I practice dealing with it with other stuff.
It's just obviously not his time. It's easy to forget he's only 20. Hes simply going to use "rehab" as an excuse to not feel bad about the handful of drugs he'll do occasionally. Hes walking around videotaping people in the rehab, snorting lines of his meds, making lengthy "irrefutable" videos about why it's actually more effective to do lines of your meds.
People get pressured into going to rehab all the time and get nothing out of it. He seems like a prime example of that phrase "YOU have to want to get clean. Not for anyone else." Going to rehab because your parents threaten to kick you out isn't a good enough reason.
But each in their ow on time.
I just wish- knowing what I know now- that I could save people some time and misery. But that ain't how this shit works.
Originally posted by Common De-mominator
That's her point: those rapists aren't caught.
I still think it's a stupid sign.
It's like saying "why do men all know a man who's been robbed or jumped, but no women know a robber?"
People- most of the time-don't talk about crimes they've committed. Especially ones they know they'd be shamed for,
For all the talk about the "rape culture" in this country, ive heard people to admit to MAJOR crimes, but I've never heard someone admit to rape. Why? Because they know they won't get any points for it. No one is going to tell a friend about a rape, and expect to hear "Damn. U one cold blooded niqquh my niqquh." It's off the table. People will turn you in or just stop being friends with you in general if they knew something like that.
My wrist is still clicking popping, sore and my whole body feels like it needs to stretch. Still hitting the gym at 6am. Can't wait u till I actually start seeing results instead of just feeling awful lol.
I kinda want this wrist to heal though. Idk whether this is normal or something I should prolly have checked out.
Originally posted by Ghost
Yeah. I haven't done hard drugs all year and haven't smoked weed all month. I bought beer on zaint zattex (4 40oz old English) and I had one in my fridge all month that I just shared tonight with hts.
Can you imagine the animal magnetism generated by two virile hardbody STRAIGHT men covering each other's oiled butts, 24/7? Ready to lay their life on the line for the other man? Ready to lay his moist body atop his brother, ready to grit his teeth and bear down hard as the bullet moves deeper into him? Imagine those men. Those STRAIGHT men, attracted to women. Totally into chicks with...big honkin.....just big ol'. *gags*... just STACKED, bro.
It also just occurred to me that a pair of homoerotic 80s buddy cops would be like the most ironically pussy smashing Halloween costume idea ever. If I'm lying, a wimmenz can tell me.
Originally posted by Octavian
I am so fucking horny. All the girls I know are either witholding the goods or "in relationships". My current financial situation leaves me housebound and unable to go "out there" per se. Fucking grim times.
Hit up tinder or something You're a decent looking enough guy that within a week or so, I imagine you'll be able to find something.
Originally posted by DietPiano
yeah, lets all use durgs drugs drugs forever! nobody get clean anymore, ok?
Snorting Wellbutrin while you're in rehab isn't "getting clean". It's the exact same thing I did with China white. It's a substitution. I'm on methadone. I don't consider myself clean. But if you have to chop up lines of your meds and then make videos rationalizing it, it means your brain is still addicted and fucked. Step 1 is taking your meds the way you're supposed to, even if it's not fun or doesn't get you fucked up. This is like introductory level shit.
