I'm actually glad the women and girls in Afghanistan are committing suicide, they don't deserve to live in a hell.
I am waiting to finish my exams before I OD. If I fail them and somehow survive my life will be even more hellish. If I'd attempted already I could be in a hospital rn full of doom about missing my exams.
And you know Aldra maybe I wouldn't have done it if you hadn't told me that he messaged you gossiping about me.
I've just never seen women acting like that irl so it must have been some fantasy men conjured up.
I've seen this a lot in movies and t.v shows, men seem to fall for women who tell them they are destined for great things or that they can tell they have good fortune coming. What is that about and does it really work? Seems so dumb.
Ig he seemed like too simple a person.
There was this ginger guy in my class in hs who had a crush on me and I was never attracted to him but now I think I would go for that type because he's like Magne from Ragnarok. It could just be hormones making me feel this way though.
Wondering if it's messed up for me to only want to have a baby with a ginger person. I just really want it to have blue eyes like my dad and love ginger hair.
Feel kind of out of it. I've had my vitamins, smart drug, monster and a walk and the fatigue is still there.
It was sunny and I was attacking my dad's village with some raiders. The water was clear blue and I happened upon a fisherman, he said I couldn't be from here because I was genetically different and I said I was from the future. I wanted to settle there. I can't remember but a lot was going on. I've been watching too much Vikings.
I've set some foundations like talked with my counsellor but not about everything so she'll back me up, and mentioned it to my GP without saying everything so they will already be suspicious and that's what I want.
Still on the fence about getting mental help. I keep getting signs not to; The phoneline is always busy or they're closed or news articles will come up and the nightmares. I was sick the other night from information overload, that's how I know too much is going on for me to deal with. My sister has kind of rescued me today because everyone else makes me feel unloved.
Ik what helps, staying away from this place, isolating myself completely, listening to hypnosis, diazepam and focusing on studies. It's not good to isolate myself for so long though and I've found my anxiety flares up in other communities because I'm too focused on seeming normal. I really hope the Scooby Doo RPG takes off though.
And it's Aldra's fault. He gave me the Github and told me Sophie had been messaging him to gossip about me.
I've already invited his lil greysec buddies here. Idk if it's my split personality but if he wants to hurt me it's going to end bad for everyone.
2023-05-04 at 8:51 PM UTC
in
The brain fog is real
Ig covid was a real zombie virus.
2023-05-04 at 8:49 PM UTC
in
The brain fog is real
I really don't want to spend the rest of my life like this, it wouldn't be worth it. I hope they find a cure. Ik the brain isn't structually damaged at least.
