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Posts by smokemon
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2022-04-29 at 12:35 AM UTC in 🍬🍬Candy~Land🍬🍬At work, do you wear low cut tops and tantalize everyone who comes in with your titillating ta-tas?
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2022-04-28 at 11:38 PM UTC in The brains of niggers have not evolved to the extent of the brains of Caucasians...
Originally posted by cigreting wHY DO AFRICANS SMEEL LIEK STOOL SAMPLE
That reminds me of the school bus in 10th grade.
There were these two black kids that sat in the seat in front of me. I could smell them from back in my seat. Their bodies were emanating this weird ass smell and I always arrived at school fully pissed off that they has assaulted my sniffer the whole ride. It was not armpit stank, and very hard to describe. It was like some strange cheese hybridized with the smell of a musty old book, with a dash of mellow poop aroma.
One day the two blax were talking to each other in the seat, and one kid has his head leaned up against the window. When we arrived at school and he got up, I noticed his nasty ass left a huge round grease mark on the window, like someone had wiped the pane with a handful of french fries.
Luckily I don't live anywhere near Atlanta anymore.
I'll never forget that smell, so awful. -
2022-04-28 at 10:51 PM UTC in Space LSDWhat if you were tripping hard during a scheduled 5 hour space walk, but 30 minutes after you exit the airlock you have the urge to diarrhea?
Would you just let it all go, ruin the suit and breathe dump fumes, or would you clench the brimstone gate with all your might for 4 and a half hours while on your psychadelic voyage?
Clenching my butthole with a round in the chamber is one of my least favorite things to do.
I would probably just give in and crap my suit. -
2022-04-28 at 7:51 AM UTC in Space LSDWhat if you accidentally opened your space helmet visor?
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2022-04-27 at 7:55 PM UTC in wut did u dream about last nightLast night dream:
It all started with my best friend's mom and my mom arguing. I was observing them argue. They got mad and started catfighting, throwing girly punches and pulling each other's hair. After a minute or two of them fighting, my friend's mom got my mom in a headlock and was choking her out. I was like "Oh HELL NAW," and ran up and punched his mom really hard in the face. After I hit her, she let go of my mom and stated angrily "I'm calling the police!" As she took out her phone and dialed 911, I ran. The whole rest of the dream I was running through random neighborhoods I didn't recognize trying to evade the police. Kind of like in GTA, as I ran I could hear police radio chatter in my head. At one point I went up to a bystander and tried to ask him where the fuck I was, but after I asked him he was like "Wait, aren't you that guy the police are after" I randomly produced a revolver pistol from my waistband and shoved it in his face. He ran off scared and I continued my way cutting through people's backyards and stuff. After awhile, I found a deck in someone's backyard and hid under the deck. While I was hiding there, I pulled out a phone and was trying to figure out where the hell I was looking at a map on the phone screen. Then the dream suddenly ended while I was looking at the map. -
2022-04-27 at 7:32 PM UTC in Why didn't she wanna be more than friends
Originally posted by Iseedivision rather date a inconsiderate drug addict a****** who hits them then be with me a guy who is there to help her with her problems
Stop being an emotional tampon.
Niceness does not make a woman's Genie tingle.
Nothing worse than finding yourself being an unpaid therapist. -
2022-04-26 at 5:55 AM UTC in What are you listening to right now, space nigga?
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2022-04-24 at 7:19 PM UTC in becoming a time terroristSurely Kafka would do something dastardly and mischievous, or would she just chill and soak up the vibe?
My guess is that she would go to a nice old grandma's house and steal all the cookies from the cookie jar. -
2022-04-24 at 6:23 PM UTC in What are you listening to right now, space nigga?
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2022-04-24 at 5:10 PM UTC in becoming a time terroristI wanna go back in time to tell Emily Dickinson to stop being such a fag and then burn all her poetry.
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2022-04-24 at 4:34 PM UTC in 🍬🍬Candy~Land🍬🍬I just spent like three minutes hypnotized by your jiggling jubblies.
I'll never get that time back. -
2022-04-23 at 10:32 PM UTC in The Asimov BattalionMore like Assy-move Butt-talian.
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2022-04-23 at 4:50 PM UTC in 🍬🍬Candy~Land🍬🍬You better do some s'mores when you do the fire.
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That's it, I'm spooked!
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2022-04-23 at 4:41 PM UTC in Random image thread
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2022-04-22 at 4:35 AM UTC in Random image thread
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2022-04-22 at 3:04 AM UTC in Do you like skirts?I like skirts, but dresses are better.
They make women look a bit more feminine to me.
Not a huge fan of the miniskirt. -
2022-04-20 at 7:59 AM UTC in The election was stolen by the wayFirst Orange Man® caused hate-boner
Then The Sniffer™ caused even more hate-boner.
Well, at least we all have boners now. -
2022-04-19 at 4:38 PM UTC in What are you listening to right now, space nigga?Wheat the heck type of music even is this?
I like it.
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2022-04-17 at 6:11 PM UTC in What are you listening to right now, space nigga?I found a funky little diddy that's literally about a nigga in space.
