The Retarded Thread: Get off that bus edition

1. 2020-03-25 at 3:15 AM UTC

   #1381
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   Originally posted by Sudo my gf got mad at me because she was upset and I told her to just breathe so she smashed her phone and now her dumbass has no phone. She is a NEXT LEVEL IDJIT

   
   She sounds like my kind of crazy. Let me get her number in case it doesn’t work out
2. 2020-03-25 at 3:17 AM UTC

   #1382
   

   Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]

   Originally posted by Fox She sounds like my kind of crazy. Let me get her number in case it doesn’t work out

   
   She doesn't have a phone, can you read? Jeez
3. 2020-03-25 at 3:19 AM UTC

   #1383
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Whenever I lose a phone I just get a new one with the same number
4. 2020-03-25 at 4:08 AM UTC

   #1384
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle
   You were my 7000th fox.
5. 2020-03-25 at 4:10 AM UTC

   #1385
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle
   Imagine being me.
   
   Do it . Close your eyes.
   
   Just for 5 seconds even. And just imagine.
6. 2020-03-25 at 4:28 AM UTC

   #1386
   Netflxchillr African Astronaut
   you BITCH 😠
   
   @ mmq
7. 2020-03-25 at 4:35 AM UTC

   #1387
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle
   I just had one of the pest perks of being me just ever happen
8. 2020-03-25 at 4:36 AM UTC

   #1388
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle
   I'm just kidding I'm being dramatic . I walked over down my hallway and knocked and Jess's door.
9. 2020-03-25 at 4:36 AM UTC

   #1389
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle
   Do you what it's like being addicted the smell of weed?
10. 2020-03-25 at 5:24 AM UTC

    #1390
    

    frala Avant garde shartist
    Don’t cough on Jess.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

    • mmQ
11. 2020-03-25 at 5:25 AM UTC

    #1391
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by mmQ Imagine being me.
    
    Do it . Close your eyes.
    
    Just for 5 seconds even. And just imagine.

    
    5......4......3.....
    
    *kills self*
12. 2020-03-25 at 5:45 AM UTC

    #1392
    

    mmQ Lisa Turtle

    Originally posted by frala Don’t cough on Jess.

    
    I laughed out loud.
13. 2020-03-25 at 8:52 AM UTC

    #1393
    

    Octavian motherfucker
    Sudo I thought you had a bird what happened?
14. 2020-03-25 at 9:20 AM UTC

    #1394
    

    ORACLE Naturally Camouflaged

    Originally posted by Sudo I really did it for shits and giggles due to quarantinization but that is duplicitous. Idk, something about the medium is so interesting/depressing. Its emptiness is right up my alley.
    
    I think a better dating app would be where people could design collages they believe represent who they are that may or may not include pictures of themselves. People are so vain they probably all will, but it would be more honest

    
    Translation: you're an ugly loser who is unattractive in pictures and can't write a bio
15. 2020-03-25 at 11:38 AM UTC

    #1395
    

    Octavian motherfucker
    Fucks sake, just as I was about to get back into work and the world goes to shit.
16. 2020-03-25 at 11:40 AM UTC

    #1396
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by Octavian Fucks sake, just as I was about to get back into work and the world goes to shit.

    
    Yeah keep telling yourself that
    
    Think of it this way, now you actually have an excuse for being out of work
17. 2020-03-25 at 11:41 AM UTC

    #1397
    

    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    damn i love this site
18. 2020-03-25 at 12:36 PM UTC

    #1398
    

    Octavian motherfucker

    Originally posted by Fox Yeah keep telling yourself that
    
    Think of it this way, now you actually have an excuse for being out of work

    
    Lol.
19. 2020-03-25 at 6:02 PM UTC

    #1399
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by mmQ Who has the link to the best gore video of 2018 thr one where the dad gets his throat cut in front of his kid and then they slice the kid up and tear his beating heart from his body?

    
    I can find it im sure. Probably on bestgore
20. 2020-03-25 at 6:30 PM UTC

    #1400
    

    Octavian motherfucker
    Locking down at my mother's. Is this shit on for 12 weeks!!! FUCK!!
    
    This some serious Dystopian 1984 shit. Government annoucements and plague.
    
    Lengthy Lockdowns Ravishing My Way Of Life OW!
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

    • Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country