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The Retardest Thread: Fashionably Late Edition.
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2018-05-26 at 12:27 AM UTCtfw TRT gets too many posts to keep up with again
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2018-05-26 at 12:56 AM UTCMy nigga TakeOff finishing the song and making it worthwhile yet again :
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2018-05-26 at 3:35 AM UTCThe hydro drama is old and tl;dr.
We need new drama. Fight me IRL. -
2018-05-26 at 3:54 AM UTCuranaussnes's plip
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2018-05-26 at 3:58 AM UTCi agree, any of you DH faggots wanna beef? you don't wanna fuck with me i'm about that insulting strangers on the internet life
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2018-05-26 at 4:09 AM UTC
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2018-05-26 at 5:32 AM UTCDoes your life ever feel so empty and meaningless you just want to break down and cry? I was just walking to the post office looking at plants and it was just like, "What happened? The world didn't always feel like this?"
Fortunately I got my racemic ketamine and will be giving focalin XR a trial next week. Well see how well a regimen of dosing 50mg every other day six times works. I need to always keep a stash because of how extreme my depression can reach.
At the very least you may not have to put up with depression posting anymore. Unless it doesn't work for some reason, then unless I can get TMS or ECT I'm going to kill myself.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-05-26 at 5:34 AM UTCI also returned a phone someone left on the bus, so at least a good deed may counteract annoying depression posting to some extent.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-05-26 at 5:44 AM UTC
Originally posted by gumbo Fucking delusional. I guess you don't remember everybody screaming at you to stop pointing the gun around because you were waving it wildly. I guess the other two witnesses were wrong.
You deserve every last bit of pain and suffering you endure on your way out of this world. You are a terrible human being who takes no responsibility for their actions. If I could, I would transport you into a Syrian slave market, because that's the only place in this world where you might ever be useful.
Jesus christ, you're the only delusional one.
I never waved a firearm in my life "wildly", you weren't even in the same room. You were in your room. And two "witnesses"? My grandmother was in her bedroom watching TV. Fuckhead /was standing by the wall/your door. I was standing at first, then sat down on the chair waiting for you to get your shit packed and leave. You were crying and upset and I felt terrible for that and then came to the door and tried to hand you the gun, barrel facing me, handle for you to grab. You wouldn't take it. I had said at one point BEFORE that, to fuckhead if he didn't get out of my way that the walls were so thin I could shoot your ass through the damn thing, which yes, all of what I did was wrong, the way I went about it, but you had been warned, seen that I was desperate to get fuckhead out of my life, been told I didn't want you to get hurt, didn't want shit to get even worse while you were there, as I knew it was going to and told several times that you needed to LEAVE.
I really wish it hadn't gone the way it did. I feel terrible even now it went as such, but I'm not going to take blame for some over hyped version. I know what I did. I know it was wrong. And since it happened I've been apologetic, regretful, and have tried to make it right as best as one can/make amends. I have took responsibility for my actions and owned what I did, you're the only one who hasn't.
You were told after throwing a beer at me which splattered everywhere, including the baby being covered, this being right after I got out of the hospital and in serious pain and you falling into me after saying several times to please watch it, or go lay down in bed, I couldn't because if I laid on my back I couldn't breath, being the only reason I was sitting on the couch in the corner of the sectional. You fell into me while I was dozed off asleep and acted like I attacked you when I instinctually pushed/kicked this huge fucking weight that landed right on my lung where I had pneumonia and already could barely breath. You threw beer at me, beer I drove out of my way from the ER to get you so your alcoholic ass wouldn't be in WDs(which you cracked my screen worse instead of talking to me when we were in the parking lot- I wasn't being mean, I was just trying to figure out what was wrong with you - apparently you had an ear infection for the first time in your life and acted like a big fucking baby. When we got home and you asked me to put rubbing alcohol in your ear to dry it out you got mad at me because you left your mouth open and some poured down your face... Meanwhile I can barely breath).
After the shit with throwing beer because your either drunk and/or impaired by the ear infection I got pissed and told you to get the beer off my property. You went outside. I waited 5mins or so then said "okay, you don't want to get it off then I'm getting rid of it". I struggled up got the beer and began dumping it down the sink. You then came behind me grabbing me, pushing me. And otherwise touching and grasping me in a aggressive manner to stop me. I kept going just for the beer to get rid of it. You then came behind me and grabbed me around the neck. That's when I got scared and it hurt, so I bit the ever living shit out of you. You threatened to call the cops and I told you to go the fuck ahead since I couldn't have bitten you like that without you grabbing me from behind. It literally would have been impossible and YOU would have been the one going to jail just for that. Hell. You could have called for me "illegally destroying your beer", which lol... Doesn't matter if you had one beer or 10, throwing beer because your mad you fell into a sick person and they kicked you off of them isn't acceptable or right. Nothing you did that night was right.
My only regret is I should have called the police, and I shouldn't have replaced your beer the next day. I'd done nothing to you that night. Hell, earlier I asked if you could hand me my medicine which was next to you and you refused. I didn't say a word, and just sat there and tried to sleep, saying only once before I dozed off seeing you wabbling about to PLEASE WATCH OUT or go to the bedroom to sleep since I was scared you'd fall on me, just like you ended up doing landing right on my lung/chest. I was some monster though for kicking you off so I could breath though. While I was woken up to ungodly pain of your weight on my lungs.... Nope, for that I'm not going to feel bad anymore. Nor for the beer, other than I should have just called the cops and had you arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct and assault by throwing the beer at me and having me covered in it. Hell, I could have for you falling on me but after I came to be awake I did realize it was an accident, albeit, a preventable accident.
I don't even feel bad other than it had to come to me biting the shit out of you. You had no right to put your hands on me, for your beer or not. Touching a person is assault. You weren't a resident of that house and made it abundantly clear prior. When you came to grab me around the neck, what was I supposed to think in that moment? I promise you, any cop would have seen that as what's called "defensive" injuries because I could have only bit you like that with your arms around me from behind). You hurt me over and over because you were upset your chance to remove your beer from the house had sailed and I was pouring it out. That's a sad as fuck reason to hurt and attack someone to begin with.
Where's the responsibility you've taken for that? I was emotionally manipulated and made to feel like shit for DEFENDING myself when I was about to be choked out and or otherwise hurt more.
I'm sorry you're delusional to how shit actually went down. I know it was very traumatic for you. I'm sorry for a lot of shit and I take responsibility for that, but I can't change the past and I'll be damned if I'm gonna keep living in the past like you want to do. All we can do is move on. I'm moving on whether you do or not though. I tried every way to make amends, make up for it, to make it right, but nothing is good enough for you and you love having that card up your sleeve for any reason to pull it mostly being a unrelated to it when you would. Doesn't phase me or make me cry any more though, so that's why you're pissed.
It's a shame it had to come to this. I tried to be a good friend, as best as I could. I even tried to give you ammo so you could feel safe, but all you want to do is use it to hurt me because you can't move on. You do realize, that the inability to move on from a traumatic event is a mental health problem, right? You should get help. You've described PTSD a lot too. I truly am sorry I was apart and caused it, but you need help to get well and I hope you do.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-05-26 at 5:44 AM UTCThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-05-26 at 5:54 AM UTC
Originally posted by Malice Does your life ever feel so empty and meaningless you just want to break down and cry? I was just walking to the post office looking at plants and it was just like, "What happened? The world didn't always feel like this?"
Fortunately I got my racemic ketamine and will be giving focalin XR a trial next week. Well see how well a regimen of dosing 50mg every other day six times works. I need to always keep a stash because of how extreme my depression can reach.
At the very least you may not have to put up with depression posting anymore. Unless it doesn't work for some reason, then unless I can get TMS or ECT I'm going to kill myself.
I'm glad you seem to at least have a little fight left in you to live. *hugs* I do know that feeling, albeit, probably not for such extended periods of times. I wish I could do something to help, Mal. I'm not in a good spot myself and I'm in bad pain, and according to the doctors, I might kick the bucket soon if I can't get my hemoglobin up, but if I can help, I'm here for you. Don't ever be afraid to ask. That's what friends are for. -
2018-05-26 at 5:58 AM UTC
Originally posted by Malice Does your life ever feel so empty and meaningless you just want to break down and cry? I was just walking to the post office looking at plants and it was just like, "What happened? The world didn't always feel like this?"
all the time just stop thinking lol life gets sooo much better when you stop thinking about stuffThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-05-26 at 6:24 AM UTC
Originally posted by aldra for me it's more a sense of 'this ride is going nowhere, I want to get off'
Yeah, that was a major reason why I wanted to drop out and just wander into the wilderness where my body would ideally never be found. I just don’t see anything to look forward to, and realistically for the vast majority of people there’s just complacency, not breakthrough where they find happiness.
I’m going to research if there’s a way I can get transcranial magnetic stimulation.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-05-26 at 6:30 AM UTC
Originally posted by Malice Yeah, that was a major reason why I wanted to drop out and just wander into the wilderness where my body would ideally never be found. I just don’t see anything to look forward to, and realistically for the vast majority of people there’s just complacency, not breakthrough where they find happiness.
I’m going to research if there’s a way I can get transcranial magnetic stimulation.
you vain hope is what causes you so much pain. your obsession with finding a solution to your problems is the root of all your suffering.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-05-26 at 6:31 AM UTC
Originally posted by RisiR † Everyone changed usernames. Who are you, buddy?
I read stuff on Zoklet but never joined. I can't remember if I posted on IS or not. I knew NiS was around but didn't read it or make an account. Looked it up a month ago and felt like posting.
First account that I'm aware of, so I guess I'm technically new blood.
Nice to finally meet you allThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-05-26 at 6:38 AM UTC
Originally posted by Malice At the very least you may not have to put up with depression posting anymore.
It's not annoying to me, it's frustrating that you refuse to listen and then go down an obsessive rabbit hole of terrible ideas.
For instance, let me ask you point blank again. Why don't you try opioids? -
2018-05-26 at 6:54 AM UTCThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-05-26 at 7:09 AM UTC
Originally posted by DietPiano It's not annoying to me, it's frustrating that you refuse to listen and then go down an obsessive rabbit hole of terrible ideas.
For instance, let me ask you point blank again. Why don't you try opioids?
Nice try, Casper. You're not getting my NEETbucks.
Originally posted by HTS you vain hope is what causes you so much pain. your obsession with finding a solution to your problems is the root of all your suffering.
True, it's a great part of it. There's a teaching Buddhism that was well explained here, the parable of the two arrows. I recall ArmsMerchant espousing the same views when he made a post about slamming his finger in a car door.The buddha has another example called The Arrow. The buddha, the highest monks, and the most unaware person in the world walk into a bar. Someone shoots them all 3 in the leg with an arrow. They all feel the great and intense pain of the arrow in their leg, this is a physical and biological response which can't be helped. If you try to fight this, it will only make it worse generally.
But there's a second agony which can come after that, which is created by the mind. This is the traditional scripture which goes into a lot of detail on it, but the short version is that the secondary mental agony like "Ow, I'm gonna be hurt for weeks, I may lose my leg, I may bleed out here, why can't I stop this pain" is actually the person themselves shooting a second arrow into the same leg. The pain experienced from this mental processing is, imho much much worse than the pain actually experienced in the body.
It's really just a profoundly ingrained self-destructive habit, but I seem to gravitate towards self-destruction more strongly than anything. Why is it illogical or wrong to prefer non-existence to even the greatest eternal joy? What many people miss about The Myth of Sisyphus is that by it's logic you may as well decide whether to commit suicide by a coin toss.
Imagine it, that must be what death by barbiturates can be like in its final moments. Just fully letting go and feeling absolute peace. You finally escape the human predicament. -
2018-05-26 at 7:21 AM UTC
Originally posted by hydromorphone Jesus christ, you're the only delusional one.
I never waved a firearm in my life "wildly", you weren't even in the same room. You were in your room. And two "witnesses"? My grandmother was in her bedroom watching TV. Fuckhead /was standing by the wall/your door. I was standing at first, then sat down on the chair waiting for you to get your shit packed and leave. You were crying and upset and I felt terrible for that and then came to the door and tried to hand you the gun, barrel facing me, handle for you to grab. You wouldn't take it. I had said at one point BEFORE that, to fuckhead if he didn't get out of my way that the walls were so thin I could shoot your ass through the damn thing, which yes, all of what I did was wrong, the way I went about it, but you had been warned, seen that I was desperate to get fuckhead out of my life, been told I didn't want you to get hurt, didn't want shit to get even worse while you were there, as I knew it was going to and told several times that you needed to LEAVE.
I really wish it hadn't gone the way it did. I feel terrible even now it went as such, but I'm not going to take blame for some over hyped version. I know what I did. I know it was wrong. And since it happened I've been apologetic, regretful, and have tried to make it right as best as one can/make amends. I have took responsibility for my actions and owned what I did, you're the only one who hasn't.
You were told after throwing a beer at me which splattered everywhere, including the baby being covered, this being right after I got out of the hospital and in serious pain and you falling into me after saying several times to please watch it, or go lay down in bed, I couldn't because if I laid on my back I couldn't breath, being the only reason I was sitting on the couch in the corner of the sectional. You fell into me while I was dozed off asleep and acted like I attacked you when I instinctually pushed/kicked this huge fucking weight that landed right on my lung where I had pneumonia and already could barely breath. You threw beer at me, beer I drove out of my way from the ER to get you so your alcoholic ass wouldn't be in WDs(which you cracked my screen worse instead of talking to me when we were in the parking lot- I wasn't being mean, I was just trying to figure out what was wrong with you - apparently you had an ear infection for the first time in your life and acted like a big fucking baby. When we got home and you asked me to put rubbing alcohol in your ear to dry it out you got mad at me because you left your mouth open and some poured down your face… Meanwhile I can barely breath).
After the shit with throwing beer because your either drunk and/or impaired by the ear infection I got pissed and told you to get the beer off my property. You went outside. I waited 5mins or so then said "okay, you don't want to get it off then I'm getting rid of it". I struggled up got the beer and began dumping it down the sink. You then came behind me grabbing me, pushing me. And otherwise touching and grasping me in a aggressive manner to stop me. I kept going just for the beer to get rid of it. You then came behind me and grabbed me around the neck. That's when I got scared and it hurt, so I bit the ever living shit out of you. You threatened to call the cops and I told you to go the fuck ahead since I couldn't have bitten you like that without you grabbing me from behind. It literally would have been impossible and YOU would have been the one going to jail just for that. Hell. You could have called for me "illegally destroying your beer", which lol… Doesn't matter if you had one beer or 10, throwing beer because your mad you fell into a sick person and they kicked you off of them isn't acceptable or right. Nothing you did that night was right.
My only regret is I should have called the police, and I shouldn't have replaced your beer the next day. I'd done nothing to you that night. Hell, earlier I asked if you could hand me my medicine which was next to you and you refused. I didn't say a word, and just sat there and tried to sleep, saying only once before I dozed off seeing you wabbling about to PLEASE WATCH OUT or go to the bedroom to sleep since I was scared you'd fall on me, just like you ended up doing landing right on my lung/chest. I was some monster though for kicking you off so I could breath though. While I was woken up to ungodly pain of your weight on my lungs…. Nope, for that I'm not going to feel bad anymore. Nor for the beer, other than I should have just called the cops and had you arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct and assault by throwing the beer at me and having me covered in it. Hell, I could have for you falling on me but after I came to be awake I did realize it was an accident, albeit, a preventable accident.
I don't even feel bad other than it had to come to me biting the shit out of you. You had no right to put your hands on me, for your beer or not. Touching a person is assault. You weren't a resident of that house and made it abundantly clear prior. When you came to grab me around the neck, what was I supposed to think in that moment? I promise you, any cop would have seen that as what's called "defensive" injuries because I could have only bit you like that with your arms around me from behind). You hurt me over and over because you were upset your chance to remove your beer from the house had sailed and I was pouring it out. That's a sad as fuck reason to hurt and attack someone to begin with.
Where's the responsibility you've taken for that? I was emotionally manipulated and made to feel like shit for DEFENDING myself when I was about to be choked out and or otherwise hurt more.
I'm sorry you're delusional to how shit actually went down. I know it was very traumatic for you. I'm sorry for a lot of shit and I take responsibility for that, but I can't change the past and I'll be damned if I'm gonna keep living in the past like you want to do. All we can do is move on. I'm moving on whether you do or not though. I tried every way to make amends, make up for it, to make it right, but nothing is good enough for you and you love having that card up your sleeve for any reason to pull it mostly being a unrelated to it when you would. Doesn't phase me or make me cry any more though, so that's why you're pissed.
It's a shame it had to come to this. I tried to be a good friend, as best as I could. I even tried to give you ammo so you could feel safe, but all you want to do is use it to hurt me because you can't move on. You do realize, that the inability to move on from a traumatic event is a mental health problem, right? You should get help. You've described PTSD a lot too. I truly am sorry I was apart and caused it, but you need help to get well and I hope you do.
Ayyyyy CABRONE!!!!!! Can someone lend me a taller monitor!?!?!?! FUCK!!!!!! -
2018-05-26 at 7:22 AM UTC
Originally posted by hydromorphone Jesus christ, you're the only delusional one.
I never waved a firearm in my life "wildly", you weren't even in the same room. You were in your room. And two "witnesses"? My grandmother was in her bedroom watching TV. Fuckhead /was standing by the wall/your door. I was standing at first, then sat down on the chair waiting for you to get your shit packed and leave. You were crying and upset and I felt terrible for that and then came to the door and tried to hand you the gun, barrel facing me, handle for you to grab. You wouldn't take it. I had said at one point BEFORE that, to fuckhead if he didn't get out of my way that the walls were so thin I could shoot your ass through the damn thing, which yes, all of what I did was wrong, the way I went about it, but you had been warned, seen that I was desperate to get fuckhead out of my life, been told I didn't want you to get hurt, didn't want shit to get even worse while you were there, as I knew it was going to and told several times that you needed to LEAVE.
I really wish it hadn't gone the way it did. I feel terrible even now it went as such, but I'm not going to take blame for some over hyped version. I know what I did. I know it was wrong. And since it happened I've been apologetic, regretful, and have tried to make it right as best as one can/make amends. I have took responsibility for my actions and owned what I did, you're the only one who hasn't.
You were told after throwing a beer at me which splattered everywhere, including the baby being covered, this being right after I got out of the hospital and in serious pain and you falling into me after saying several times to please watch it, or go lay down in bed, I couldn't because if I laid on my back I couldn't breath, being the only reason I was sitting on the couch in the corner of the sectional. You fell into me while I was dozed off asleep and acted like I attacked you when I instinctually pushed/kicked this huge fucking weight that landed right on my lung where I had pneumonia and already could barely breath. You threw beer at me, beer I drove out of my way from the ER to get you so your alcoholic ass wouldn't be in WDs(which you cracked my screen worse instead of talking to me when we were in the parking lot- I wasn't being mean, I was just trying to figure out what was wrong with you - apparently you had an ear infection for the first time in your life and acted like a big fucking baby. When we got home and you asked me to put rubbing alcohol in your ear to dry it out you got mad at me because you left your mouth open and some poured down your face… Meanwhile I can barely breath).
After the shit with throwing beer because your either drunk and/or impaired by the ear infection I got pissed and told you to get the beer off my property. You went outside. I waited 5mins or so then said "okay, you don't want to get it off then I'm getting rid of it". I struggled up got the beer and began dumping it down the sink. You then came behind me grabbing me, pushing me. And otherwise touching and grasping me in a aggressive manner to stop me. I kept going just for the beer to get rid of it. You then came behind me and grabbed me around the neck. That's when I got scared and it hurt, so I bit the ever living shit out of you. You threatened to call the cops and I told you to go the fuck ahead since I couldn't have bitten you like that without you grabbing me from behind. It literally would have been impossible and YOU would have been the one going to jail just for that. Hell. You could have called for me "illegally destroying your beer", which lol… Doesn't matter if you had one beer or 10, throwing beer because your mad you fell into a sick person and they kicked you off of them isn't acceptable or right. Nothing you did that night was right.
My only regret is I should have called the police, and I shouldn't have replaced your beer the next day. I'd done nothing to you that night. Hell, earlier I asked if you could hand me my medicine which was next to you and you refused. I didn't say a word, and just sat there and tried to sleep, saying only once before I dozed off seeing you wabbling about to PLEASE WATCH OUT or go to the bedroom to sleep since I was scared you'd fall on me, just like you ended up doing landing right on my lung/chest. I was some monster though for kicking you off so I could breath though. While I was woken up to ungodly pain of your weight on my lungs…. Nope, for that I'm not going to feel bad anymore. Nor for the beer, other than I should have just called the cops and had you arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct and assault by throwing the beer at me and having me covered in it. Hell, I could have for you falling on me but after I came to be awake I did realize it was an accident, albeit, a preventable accident.
I don't even feel bad other than it had to come to me biting the shit out of you. You had no right to put your hands on me, for your beer or not. Touching a person is assault. You weren't a resident of that house and made it abundantly clear prior. When you came to grab me around the neck, what was I supposed to think in that moment? I promise you, any cop would have seen that as what's called "defensive" injuries because I could have only bit you like that with your arms around me from behind). You hurt me over and over because you were upset your chance to remove your beer from the house had sailed and I was pouring it out. That's a sad as fuck reason to hurt and attack someone to begin with.
Where's the responsibility you've taken for that? I was emotionally manipulated and made to feel like shit for DEFENDING myself when I was about to be choked out and or otherwise hurt more.
I'm sorry you're delusional to how shit actually went down. I know it was very traumatic for you. I'm sorry for a lot of shit and I take responsibility for that, but I can't change the past and I'll be damned if I'm gonna keep living in the past like you want to do. All we can do is move on. I'm moving on whether you do or not though. I tried every way to make amends, make up for it, to make it right, but nothing is good enough for you and you love having that card up your sleeve for any reason to pull it mostly being a unrelated to it when you would. Doesn't phase me or make me cry any more though, so that's why you're pissed.
It's a shame it had to come to this. I tried to be a good friend, as best as I could. I even tried to give you ammo so you could feel safe, but all you want to do is use it to hurt me because you can't move on. You do realize, that the inability to move on from a traumatic event is a mental health problem, right? You should get help. You've described PTSD a lot too. I truly am sorry I was apart and caused it, but you need help to get well and I hope you do.
I read this post backwards from the end to the beginning sentence by sentence and it's so much better.
