I honestly wouldn't be surprised if I'm actually dying. Like if I went to a Dr. And they said "oh, Mr. Sudo your body is shutting down and you will be dead within a few months" I would be like "Dam, that's what that is, I knew it" and feel like I solved a puzzle where the prize is my death. Like a Japanese game show. Like
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Originally posted by Sudo
I honestly wouldn't be surprised if I'm actually dying. Like if I went to a Dr. And they said "oh, Mr. Sudo your body is shutting down and you will be dead within a few months" I would be like "Dam, that's what that is, I knew it" and feel like I solved a puzzle where the prize is my death. Like a Japanese game show. Like
They always tell me my blood pressure and labs and blood sugar and stuff are pretty good and I'm like "how?"
I get a stash of Propranalol now but I don't take them regularly, only as needed.
Someone needs to take this thread behind the woodshed and put it out if it's misery. Like Ol Yeller which I actually saw as a kid because I only had 3 channels so would have to watch whatever was on CBC on Sunday night. Sad!
Fuck I'm so depressed I'm really struggling to get up and go shower. Being around my son makes me happy and really nothing else. I fantasize about faking my death so much I've started to realize how unhealthy that is. Really my biggest problems are typical middle class trappings but goddamn is it ever soul crushing. I feel like if I have to keep living like this or if someone I care about deeply dies I'm gonna go on a spiral. I need a good week-long bender or at least to disappear for that time
Originally posted by Sudo
Fuck I'm so depressed I'm really struggling to get up and go shower. Being around my son makes me happy and really nothing else. I fantasize about faking my death so much I've started to realize how unhealthy that is. Really my biggest problems are typical middle class trappings but goddamn is it ever soul crushing. I feel like if I have to keep living like this or if someone I care about deeply dies I'm gonna go on a spiral. I need a good week-long bender or at least to disappear for that time
You're not middle class you deluded coon. What you need is a good relapse, shoot a fat dose of brown and let that warm, loving feeling of Lady Heroin fuck your entire body.
Originally posted by Sudo
Fuck I'm so depressed I'm really struggling to get up and go shower. Being around my son makes me happy and really nothing else. I fantasize about faking my death so much I've started to realize how unhealthy that is. Really my biggest problems are typical middle class trappings but goddamn is it ever soul crushing. I feel like if I have to keep living like this or if someone I care about deeply dies I'm gonna go on a spiral. I need a good week-long bender or at least to disappear for that time
Take a fishing trip alone or something you like doing. Put your feet in some grass. It might do the trick if you just fall off the grid for a whole 24 hrs.
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Dis bish who knows I'm a mopey sack of shit sent me some video off Instagram at 1am last night about "getting your mind right" so I didn't watch it and instead sent her a kissy face emoji and a middle finger emoji which she left on read. I might see if she wants to get a hotel tomorrow idk, I dont even really like her. Or anyone. Or myself. I wonder WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?
2.1 years later and I'm chanelling sploo. RIP I think about him more than anyone else I can think of who died I have never laid eyes on. Fuck too many people I like are dead, THATS MY PROBLEM. I read paradise lost over the last few days and think I'm one of John Milton's muses. Worst post ever
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