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Posts That Were Thanked by -SpectraL
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2018-02-28 at 8:53 PM UTC in Libertarian Police DepartmentI was shooting heroin and reading “The Fountainhead” in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser when a call came in. I put a quarter in the radio to activate it. It was the chief.
“Bad news, detective. We got a situation.”
“What? Is the mayor trying to ban trans fats again?”
“Worse. Somebody just stole four hundred and forty-seven million dollars’ worth of bitcoins.”
The heroin needle practically fell out of my arm. “What kind of monster would do something like that? Bitcoins are the ultimate currency: virtual, anonymous, stateless. They represent true economic freedom, not subject to arbitrary manipulation by any government. Do we have any leads?”
“Not yet. But mark my words: we’re going to figure out who did this and we’re going to take them down … provided someone pays us a fair market rate to do so.”
“Easy, chief,” I said. “Any rate the market offers is, by definition, fair.”
He laughed. “That’s why you’re the best I got, Lisowski. Now you get out there and find those bitcoins.”
“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m on it.”
I put a quarter in the siren. Ten minutes later, I was on the scene. It was a normal office building, strangled on all sides by public sidewalks. I hopped over them and went inside.
“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®” I said, flashing my badge and my gun and a small picture of Ron Paul. “Nobody move unless you want to!” They didn’t.
“Now, which one of you punks is going to pay me to investigate this crime?” No one spoke up.
“Come on,” I said. “Don’t you all understand that the protection of private property is the foundation of all personal liberty?”
It didn’t seem like they did.
“Seriously, guys. Without a strong economic motivator, I’m just going to stand here and not solve this case. Cash is fine, but I prefer being paid in gold bullion or autographed Penn Jillette posters.”
Nothing. These people were stonewalling me. It almost seemed like they didn’t care that a fortune in computer money invented to buy drugs was missing.
I figured I could wait them out. I lit several cigarettes indoors. A pregnant lady coughed, and I told her that secondhand smoke is a myth. Just then, a man in glasses made a break for it.
“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®” I yelled.
Too late. He was already out the front door. I went after him.
“Stop right there!” I yelled as I ran. He was faster than me because I always try to avoid stepping on public sidewalks. Our country needs a private-sidewalk voucher system, but, thanks to the incestuous interplay between our corrupt federal government and the public-sidewalk lobby, it will never happen.
I was losing him. “Listen, I’ll pay you to stop!” I yelled. “What would you consider an appropriate price point for stopping? I’ll offer you a thirteenth of an ounce of gold and a gently worn ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!”
He turned. In his hand was a revolver that the Constitution said he had every right to own. He fired at me and missed. I pulled my own gun, put a quarter in it, and fired back. The bullet lodged in a U.S.P.S. mailbox less than a foot from his head. I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.
“All right, all right!” the man yelled, throwing down his weapon. “I give up, cop! I confess: I took the bitcoins.”
“Why’d you do it?” I asked, as I slapped a pair of Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs® on the guy.
“Because I was afraid.”
“Afraid?”
“Afraid of an economic future free from the pernicious meddling of central bankers,” he said. “I’m a central banker.”
I wanted to coldcock the guy. Years ago, a central banker killed my partner. Instead, I shook my head.
“Let this be a message to all your central-banker friends out on the street,” I said. “No matter how many bitcoins you steal, you’ll never take away the dream of an open society based on the principles of personal and economic freedom.”
He nodded, because he knew I was right. Then he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him. -
2018-02-28 at 3:29 PM UTC in In 472 days...
Originally posted by Speedy Parker … SpectraL has made 27,558 posts for an average of 58.38559322 posts per day. That is 2.4327330508 posts per hour or 1 post every 24.66361855 minutes.
These numbers represent a scenario where he hasn't slept in 472 days. So let's assume he sleeps an average of just 6 hours per day. This would mean his average posts per hour would be 3.2436440678 or 1 post every 18.497713912 minutes for 472 days.
While this is sinking in I have serious question. How do you think he does it? I mean is he rich like captain failfag with no irl friends or something else?
Discuss…
you need to get out moreThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-02-28 at 3:27 PM UTC in Straight up you cuntsThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-28 at 3:22 PM UTC in In 472 days...Do you actually think infinityshock and Spectral are the same person? You are fuckin brain dead lol.
I saw you were hinting at that the other day, now you’re actually saying it overtly lmao. What a dumbassThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-02-28 at 6:32 AM UTC in Straight up you cuntsI am kind of a sexy dudeThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-28 at 6:10 AM UTC in Straight up you cuntsOP haz a gay crush on Bill Krozby.
faggott. -
2018-02-27 at 5:21 AM UTC in What Lanny doesn't want you to knowThis website (Niggasin.space) was foreshadowed by legendary TOTSE members back in the days of the bbs. They said that a third era would come, after the collapse of the first two sites, and that this era would be led by a deceiver. We now know this deceiver to be Lanny.
Unbenknownst to you, Niggasin.space is being used to get data from for Lanny to develop a psychological profiling tool. All of the threads you make, and ESPECIALLY the ones that you begin to make but then decide not to and just go back to browsing, are fed into a machine in his basement while he tweaks his algorithms. He needed a lot of different personalities that he knew personally, and that he could use the computer to rate. If he is able to accomplish what he is trying to do, he will eventually be able to construct a believable AI simulation of a human voice that he will likely use to impersonate Jeff Hunter, which will bring consequences none of you could even understand.
I am surprised by how little the people here know. It seems totse2k1 is the only one with any inkling of an idea of what has been going on for the past 17 years, but even he knows little.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-02-25 at 10:43 PM UTC in The Nevers..The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-21 at 9:34 AM UTC in Evidently you can be sent to prison for suggesting someone kill themselves..The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-20 at 1:42 PM UTC in They're changing the lyrics to the Canadian national anthem.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-20 at 4:50 AM UTC in This Place Is Beginning To Feel....GET YOUR PAWS OFF ME YOU DIRTY APEThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-20 at 4:48 AM UTC in This Place Is Beginning To Feel....get back in the cage you primitive human.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-19 at 9:28 PM UTC in Another Bay Area CopHonestly I think the world is coming to some sort of end.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-19 at 7:32 AM UTC in The Trainwreck Tale of the Insatiable Bill KrozbyBill Krozby was born into this world much like everyone else. Crying and screaming, his little plump legs kicking into the air. The boy was healthy and happy. He ate well, shat well, and in time, even learned how to walk well. To the time-deaf parents of Bill Krozby, everything was as it should be.
At the age of three, Bill Krozby had his first girlfriend. "Cute," his parents called it. They told jokes in private. "Pretty soon they'll be getting married!" His mother once giggled. It became so 'cute' that they began to encourage it. "Well aren't you going to kiss your girlfriend goodbye?" They said. And Bill Krozby did.
Years passed and the children grew up. Bill Krozby had remained friends with this girl, though the wedding jokes had long since passed. They played regularly after school in the small outcrop behind the playground. The children enjoyed how quiet and wide it was back there, but more importantly, they enjoyed the lack of adults. It wasn't often that they got to frolic unsupervised, so they took every chance they could get to slip behind the rocks. And the parents didn't mind. They were good kids after all.
"I'm tired of tag," Bill Krozby said, exasperated. "How about we play a new game?"
Jenny sat in the dirt. "Like what?"
"You wanna play Doctor?" Bill Krozby asked. He'd been planning this for some time.
"Sure, what do I do?"
Bill Krozby smiled.
"Just lay down on that rock like you're at the doctor's office. I'll be the doctor and this will be my sethoscope!"
"Your what?" Jenny questioned.
"You know, that cold thing that the doctors use to listen to your heart?"
"I think it's called a stethoscope."
'Source?' Bill Krozby thought to himself.
"It doesn't matter though," Jenny said sweetly, moving over to the rock. "Let's just play."
Bill Krozby grabbed the rock he'd picked up earlier and put it to Jenny's chest. His heart bounced.
"Uh, Bill Krozby? I don't think the doctors do it like that."
"Oh what?" Bill Krozby rushed to say. He was glad the hot sun hid his red face. "Sorry, I haven't been to the doctor in a while. I forgot how it goes. Why don't you be the doctor instead?"
"Erm, okay." Jenny twirled nervously in her head as they switched spots. She cleared her throat, pretending to look up from a clipboard. "So Mr. Bill Krozby, what seems to be the problem?"
"Well I've got this pain right here."
"In your stomach?"
"No, a little lower."
Jenny placed her hand on Bill Krozby's abdomen. "Here?"
"Lower."
Jenny went lower.
"Lower," Bill Krozby demanded.
"Bill Krozby, I don't think we should be-" Jenny looked down as her hand was pulled away from her. "Bill Krozby WHAT ARE YOU-"
"SHUT UP YOU FUCKING SLAMPIG, THIS IS WHAT DOCTORS DO!"
Yanking herself away, Jenny ran off towards the playground in tears. She thought about telling somebody, but didn't want to get Bill Krozby in trouble. He was such a good friend. Or at least he had been. What Bill Krozby did felt wrong, but maybe it was her who was wrong. Maybe doctors actually did do that. How could she know? She wasn't a doctor. It was all so confusing to young Jenny, who had never seen or heard of anything like what she'd just experienced.
A grin spread slowly over Bill Krozby's face. His father was right, that was fun.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!- kroz,
- NARCassist,
- -SpectraL,
- HTS,
- D4NG0
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2018-02-18 at 12:11 PM UTC in Florida shooting: at least 17 killed in high school attack
Originally posted by Lanny Why don't you share what you think the pharmacological effects of SSRIs are?
I'll keep it basic since you obviously don't know shit about pharma. Suicidal and homicidal ideation are listed as side effects of many of these drugs.
Also what do you mean what I think? Do you not know who I am? I ran lab tips on totse. There aren't many more qualified people on this site to talk about this than me, and those who are more qualified would agree with me.
Let me guess you are on one or more of these drugs and think your personal experience is the only valid one. You are fine so that means everyone else must be.
I've seen this a million times and nothing I say will convince you be sure you are too wrapped up lying to yourself instead of facing your own personal issues in life.
I hate to agree with spectral just on principal but he has a point you know.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-02-17 at 4:06 PM UTC in video of stupid noob running to mailbox on first of the month
Originally posted by Internet-Weed-Dude I'm not finding this all that funny.
Yeah he's had something unpleasant happen to him and now he can't walk. really fucking funny.
Sure, he posts ''lmfao'' as if he's not bothered by shit like this. but how could someone not be? obviously that's simply the best attitude one could have about this type of thing in that type of situation.
You're a fucking douche.
Shut the fuck up retard, you might have everyone else fooled, but I see what you are doing. Also, I walk fine now, I got it amputated and wear a prosthetic leg these days. This one cost over 10k just for the leg itself, and the one I am getting in a few weeks will cost even more. I can kick concrete pylons hard as fuck and not feel a thing. Even before the surgery I was able to walk it just hurt really bad.
Also, kill yourself faggot.
Originally posted by Malice How did stupid noob become a gimp? I’ve never heard this story.
I stepped in a grain auger much like the one in my avatar picture, about 15.5 years ago. It mangled my right lower leg all to hell and left me crippled as fuck and in constant pain. I had to use a cane to get around most places where I had to walk more than a few feet. I tried to find doctors to cut it off for years and they all treated me like shit. About two years ago I got fed up with my life and started searching for a doctor again, and managed to find one willing to do it.
Originally posted by Fox Paws This is objectively funny, and so what if stupid noob wants to have a sense of humor about his disposition instead of living like a fuckin #victim
IWD is a perpetual victim, and probably IS projecting. Amputee jokes are fucking hilarious to me. I wasn't a big fan of the ribbing and shit before my surgery because I was in pain all the time, but now I don't give a fuck and make jokes about it myself. My quality of life has gone up dramatically. I went from super skelly mode at like 6 foot 150 lbs to roughly 200lbs and I work out and shit. Shits great.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-02-15 at 4:33 PM UTC in If you're a woman and you let an animal fuck you...The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-15 at 11:09 AM UTC in Abandoned Neutrons ...In Space!So if people like this then I'll do a couple more, but if you think it's shit then I won't.
Abandoned Neutrons ...In Space! -
2018-02-13 at 2:01 AM UTC in allіgatorThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-02-11 at 2:04 PM UTC in allіgatorThe truth is, you guys wish you had the abilities of SpecTroll.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
