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Posts That Were Thanked by Soyboy V: A Cat-Girl/Boy Under Every Bed

  1. Fonaplats victim of incest [daylong jump-start that nome]
    As soon as they tell you "You're hired" ask for a transgender safety bathroom.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. Archer513 African Astronaut
    Its been scientifically proven that people that announce to everyone that they’re “changing their life around”

    Fail miserably at changing their life around
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    This is a quasi-"goodbye" thread.

    I need to make some changes, and this seems like the right time to do it (while drunk and on benzos... rational decision making on steroids).

    I been getting drunker, broker, fatter, more disheveled and unkempt, and {INSERT-DEROGATORY-SUPERLATIVE-OF-CHOICE} as of late.

    And in the words of the dean or whomever from Animal House: "fat, drunk, and stupid are no way to go through life."

    I'mma bounce for a bit.

    But I might on rare occasion post on my "Muh xannies" thread in HB for casual/occasional updates.

    Also, when I finish the Totse text files archive, as well as Panny's and mmQ's word clouds, I will post them shits.

    This isn't so much "smell ya later, forever". It's just plain "smell ya later."

    I'll come back with drugs, liquor, chicks, and various other provisions when I return.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  4. Technologist victim of incest
    Soi,
    Go go go! If it’s for the same company, you’re not starting out on a good foot, if you don’t go.

    I know you’ll be fine, probably better than fine since you aren’t pressured to get this job.

    Go go go Soi🧠
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by Methuselah I already got mines like a month an a half ago.

    Buy 1 BTC with it

    I'm putting aside about a third of it for BTC.

    So I can buy drugs with said BTC.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  6. gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    WELL FUCKING PLAYED FINNY...

    The whole enhancement-by-username thing just ain't gonna cut it, apparantly.

    By him changing it to "inflnityshock", the script is now useless.

    You might want to just ban by registration date like before, but be forewarned that some legit new users will also be blocked.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  7. Michael Myers victim of incest [divide your nonresilient tucker]
    Originally posted by Octavian I actually respect the Taliban, that is, the Soviet bashing OGs.

    Ahmad Shah Massoud is someone I looked upto as a teenager, reading about the struggle and aftermath of the soviet invasion and Taliban rule. A true unsung Islamic hero that was tragically killed too soon.

    C'est la vie

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ahmad_Shah_Massoud

    I'm a little skeptical about him. While he was anti-Taliban (post-Soviet surrender), I have a gut feeling that he would have joined the Mujahideen if he knew what the Americans were doing today. The reason I am skeptical about him is because nearly every Afghan in the west idolizes this man. And the problem with these Afghans is that they are degenerate as f*ck, so that's why I'm skeptical about him; in my mind, if people look up to you; it's because they can relate to you, but I hope I'm wrong. I'm very much pro-Taliban myself; I hate America with a burning passion, so everytime US soldiers get PWN'd, it feels like a little bit of justice has been done for all the crimes they've committed. But, believe it or not, the Taliban even wishes the American people would not send their sons to battle for a war that is not even theirs. But, of course, mainstream media would never say that.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  8. Zanick motherfucker [my p.a. supernal goa]
    Originally posted by tee hee hee Well maybe you should have specified that in your opening post. 😞

    You’re right, I should have. You can punish me if you want, free of charge, any method you like. In fact, I’ll pay you for the privilege. Just promise you’ll hurt me deep and I’ll remember you until I die, honey.

    And I’ll still wash the curtains.

    Originally posted by MORALLY SUPERIOR BEING V: A Cat-Girl/Boy Under Every Bed $150, I want you to live under my bed and pretend to be a cat.

    You will be responsible for sourcing, cleaning and repairing your uniform, which will be as follows:



    Please get back to me with your acceptance.

    Offer accepted. I’m boarding a transatlantic flight as you read this post.

    Originally posted by GGG How much for your bottom right premolars?

    Is 30 enough?

    $30 is plenty, but I’d ask that you also take the bottom left for symmetry and sew everything up when you’re finished with the extractions. When I go in to see my dentist next week, I intend to gaslight her into believing I had fewer teeth than she remembers.

    Originally posted by stl1 Can you jump over an 8 foot fence?

    I’ll do it in the nude, hopping on one foot. It can be lined with razor wire and/or any other traps you require. I’m not sure whether I’ll be successful, and the uncertainty is very arousing. I expect that I’ll be fully erect for the occasion. Show me the money, and this experience can be yours forever.

    Originally posted by gadzooks Are organs up for grabs?

    I'll take a kidney and a portion of the liver.

    Organs are available while supplies last.

    Originally posted by GGG Fuck gadzooks.

    I'll give you 100 for the kidneys and liver.

    I would’ve taken this tbh but you niggas kept going.

    Originally posted by gadzooks I bid $150.

    (ITT we auction off Zanick's body piece by piece).

    Also an acceptable offer.

    Originally posted by GGG 200.

    You flatter me!

    Originally posted by GGG Zanick is gonna end up considerably dismembered and disabled for less than 500 lol

    No turning back tho. A man sticks to his word, and Zanick is indeed a hell of a MAN

    It’s really more about the thrilling prospect of mutilation and prostitution, no dollar amount could satisfy me.

    The disfigurement of my penis was an introduction into a world of excellent pain.

    Originally posted by gadzooks I bid $10,000 for the whole package.

    Just so I can preserve his freedom (but I will take a kidney, tho, and put that shit on ice for later).

    I appreciate the generous bid and I accept, but I’d first need your assurance that I’d be free to continue with this business endeavor after my body is yours.

    Originally posted by ohfralala I would like to slide a lubed banana into your anus while you breathlessly whisper Karen.

    Free of charge.

    I’m kind hearted and compassionate.

    Originally posted by ohfralala Oh wait you’re trying to make money here. I’ll give you $200.

    Offer accepted! Just don’t ask me to eat the banana. I’ll do it if you do, but I don’t like bananas.

    (I would’ve done it for free but you put this in writing, and I am still an attorney in some states.)

    Originally posted by mmQ I'll drop a $50 to slice off your feet with a rusty razor blade.

    Deal, but you have to do something creative with them afterward or I’m donating the money to a charity that takes care of orphans.

    If you fulfill your end, I’ll dress up a homeless couple and pay them to feign interest in adoption and then back out at a maximally damaging moment for the kids.

    Originally posted by MORALLY SUPERIOR BEING V: A Cat-Girl/Boy Under Every Bed I want to up my offer to a can of tuna OR salmon daily.*

    Also ad lib/unlimited cat nuts.

    This is a sweet deal Zanny don't pass it up.

    *subject to purring pleasingly when I rub your fur

    What the fuck, you can’t change the terms after I get on the plane. Sorry, but I am morally obligated to refuse this offer. You were better off the first time. If you can make an offer that includes soy products, I will gladly accept.

    Unfortunately, I’ve already created quite a ruckus trying to eject myself from the flight. You’ll have to wait a couple of days while I sort out the ensuing legal complications of my actions.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  9. Michael Myers victim of incest [divide your nonresilient tucker]
    Originally posted by GGG About how old is he? Because when I started this thread I thought he was like 10 and then he starts railing lines.

    Tell him to save his nose for better drugs.

    Don't take my word for it, but I think he's 11.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  10. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    because israel is not the pet in this relationship
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  11. Michael Myers victim of incest [divide your nonresilient tucker]
    Originally posted by We'reAllBrownNosers The Saudi royal family is also a creation of the British. Similar to Israel being created by the British, it did not really exist before the British seized control of the Ottoman territories and created it. Nor did saudi arabia. The british empire has been doing this kind of shit all over the world for a long time.

    You are well-versed in history, my friend. The British made sure the Arabs would revolt against the Ottomans. Basically, the Arabs backstabbed the Ottomans, and in turn, the British backstabbed the Arabs when they handed Palestine to the zionists; even though initially the zionists had their eyes set on Argentine instead of Palestine, but they were convinced to take Palestine instead, after turning down that proposal a couple of times before. To be honest, Palestine's current situation is cosmic justice, if you ask me. The British Empire also made sure to cement Kashmir as a divided land, so they could sell arms to both Pakistan and India. The British are without a doubt one of, if not, the dirtiest people to exist. One thing is for sure... the World War was not won by the good guys. The British actually rounded up and then killed Islamic Hindustanis who refused to fight against the Ottomans during the first World War. History is indeed written by the victors, and they made sure to twist everything instead.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  12. kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    last night i was just getting krunk and actually about to go to sleep early and then this guy, steven crowders little brother, you know from lowder with crowder the alt right political pundant, shows up knocking at my door with a twelve pack of voodoo ranger brew and he starts talking shit so i proceed to talk about fucking his sister who he currently lives with and how I farted on his pillow and thats why he has pink eye, ect.. and he was getting kinda frothy so i started acting like a dick and was talking about how i fucked his gf and he believed me which is kinda sad.. and he was like "man why is it im tall and good looking and you fuck everyone" I don't know what i said exactly but something cheeky and slammed my fingers into his mouth and he clenched down and i was like "DAAAAHURRRR!! WHAT THE FUCK MAN!" and i was bleeding everywhere, we sipped a few more brews and he left.





    his sister bit me too back in the summer, i went to give her a kiss and she just chewed my lip and i was spitting blood in her sink saying "im bleeding".. and she was like 'wimp'. I imediately went and fucked her and came and started putting on my clothes and she started crying asking why im leaving.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  13. gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    I still want to know what exact ADHD medication this is...

    If it's methylphenidate/ritalin, that's one thing.

    If it's adderall, especially instant release, your little brother is gangster as fuck.

    Do you have any idea how much money you could make selling those pills individually?

    He will be the richest kid in school, that's for sure.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  14. Lanny Bird of Courage
    Originally posted by 34nfi4w8g3wnfge4j93qrj309jg He doesn't even have ADHD though he showed me the website he got the idea from

    You don't have to have ADHD to benefit from the miracle of amphetamines.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  15. GGG victim of incest [my veinlike two-fold aepyornidae]
    Post-ingestive feedback is a term coined by Fred Provenza, who conducted several experiments on nutrition throughout the late 20th century and probably this century too, idk. I'm just going to tell you about one though.

    Essentially, through previous experiments, the idea was postulated that animals/humans base their dietary preferences on what they need the most. To test this, Provenza made some sheep deficient in phosphorous. The idea was that they would prefer food based on the phosphorous content due to their lack of phosphorous.

    He gave them both coconut and maple flavored feed, which did not contain phosphorous. The sheep didn't care for it much, and did not really seem to prefer either one.

    The next step was to pump a phosphorous solution into the stomach of the sheep directly after feeding. This eliminated the variable of them preferring food which actually contained phosphorous, and created a scenario in which their association with phosphorous was with the smell/taste of the food itself, and not an association with the actual taste of phosphorous.

    The sheep who pumped after being fed coconut feed, preferred the coconut feed. Those that were pumped after eating maple feed, tended to prefer the maple feed. They were associating the smell and taste of coconut or maple with a food that was rich in phosphorous.

    Eventually the sheep were no longer deficient, and they went back to having no preference.

    He tried this experiment with calicum and protein, and the results were the same. The sheep preferred whatever flavor of food they associated with actual nutritional value.

    Similar experiments have been conducted on humans, and have turned out the same. We base our preferences off of foods that have nutritional value. Now this doesn't mean "healthy food" it simply means stuff that has what our body needs. If you are deficient in vitamin C and you have already associated oranges with receiving an influx of vitamin C, you will crave oranges, and so on and so forth.

    The problem for humans lie in the inability of our bodies to know when to stop eating certain things. Mainly, fats and sugars, which were such a rarity for pre-civilization humans that we crave it uncontrollably. Back then, we were used to eating to survive. All that extra energy, and all those calories, was incredibly beneficial to stock up on.

    This obviously hasn't translated well into the 21st century, and now we are dealing with obesity because our post-ingestive feedback is based on unhealthy things. Our bodies want to stock up on carbs when we are not deficient, and food manufacturers know exactly what chemical triggers to fire off in order to tap into those cravings. Almost everything nowadays is flavored. Even the raw, "natural" meat in the stores has this flavoring. All the "natural" in "natural flavoring" means is that it originated from a natural source. It does not actually mean that this substance was found and extracted in nature.

    Understanding this link is really important, because it helps you to better understand the patterns and reasons that you crave certain foods. Your body is telling you that you need to eat another jelly donut, but you don't really need it. It's an active battle, and in order to win this battle, you need to train your body into craving foods that are actually good for you. If you eat an apple every time you crave sugar, you will soon begin to crave apples instead of sugar frosted donuts, or other carbs.

    I'm not saying that you shouldn't eat these things, I'm just saying that we shouldn't be eating as much as our body tells us to. Fat people can really get stuck in a loop on this one because their bodies are so accustomed to eating very high fat/sugar diets that it's a hell of a cycle to break. They crave these foods so much more than people who are not fat, because their brains have made the association that these are the foods to go to when they are in need of fat/sugar, and like I said earlier, humans are ALWAYS "in need" of fat and sugar.

    I've been eating considerably less sugar and carbs for like the past year+, and I can say that a lot of the cravings really do go away. It used to be such a struggle for me to eat healthy. I was never overweight (probably should've been) but I would still feel like shit from eating too much sugar, or too many carbs. I still take lots of fats everyday (dat DHA and EPA) but they're the right kind of fats, and not the oily nastiness that you'll find in a frozen strip of Tyson breaded chicken tenders, or in a carton of McDonald's french fries.

    I want to switch to eating sardines or something for my daily fat value, but I don't know if I can stomach them.

    Anyway, /thread.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  16. Originally posted by HTS Let me get my balls removed first, m8. I'm this close to achieving true enlightenment.

    have them transplanted into your boyfriend.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. HTS highlight reel
    f u l l y
    a u t o m a t e d
    l u x u r y
    g a y
    s p a c e
    c o m m u n i s m
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  18. GGG victim of incest [my veinlike two-fold aepyornidae]
    Originally posted by Narc To me a 40 grand car just represents 39 grands worth of rent, food, drugs and pussy that I'd then never get to use.


    .

    Lol Narc thinks a 40k car draws attention.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  19. Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  20. Mahmoud Houston
    Originally posted by GGG I'm Chinese…

    Then you should love Chairman Yang
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