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Posts That Were Thanked by I Live In Your Crawlspace Secretly4
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2022-08-23 at 11:04 PM UTC in Decided how I'm going to reward myself.Wow. Now I finally "get it"The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-23 at 10:22 PM UTC in SCHIZOPHRENIA COMPASSIVE LEARNED SO MUCH FROM THIS THREADThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-23 at 6:16 PM UTC in This week these two officers did a traffic stop, during the stop of violating a red light,The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-23 at 5 PM UTC in SCHIZOPHRENIA COMPASS
I have a bunch of people I haven't done yet, I'll update later
bradley
The Shapeshifter (4,1). Unstoppable, indestructable, lives only to FUCK and doesn't care what he penetrates. You won't be able to tell he isn't human unless you get close enough, at which point it's too late. Even his penis was crafted to do maximum damage to its target.
bummy_mofo
The Hotep (6,5). Heir to a lineage of nigger-God-kings. Will one day unite the tribes of Africa to drive the J'ews out of Jerusalem, where he'll take his rightful throne at what was once the Temple Mount.
candy
True Crime Fetishist (6,4). She has a secret shoebox containing correspondence with Ed Kemper and Richard Ramirez. One day she'll collect enough nipples for a belt of her own.
donttellem
The Madman (4,4). I honestly don't know what she's talking about most of the time.
fonaplats
Baron of the Rats (6,3). Because rats don't have drunk Mexican neighbours, and they don't constantly bitch at you about groceries or auto work or why there's Flex Seal everywhere. When your house floods, there are always friends under the overpass.
frala
The Cherubim(2,1). Was once a person, but was forcibly 'ascended' and now only exists to serve Lanny and annoy everyone else.
jigaboo
The Program Manager (5,3). Wanted a regular job as a middle-manager, somehow got put in charge of Remote Viewing. One day one of his students let slip that they saw his wife cheating on him and he promptly divorced her. The kids became enamored with the power they had over him and went on to ruin every one of his subsequent marriages. It would later come out that the Remote Viewing project was a total failure and that they had a success rate far lower than they should have through chance alone.
kafka
The Joyful Goetist (4,3), The Victorian (3,4). Hedonism and vanity put her in contact with entities who promised 'experience beyond limits' like in Hellraiser, but once she sent them topless photos they never responded to her summons again.
lanny
The Azathoth (The Demiurge)(1,1), Gangster Computer God (7,1). Created a world just to spite it, laughs as it tears itself apart again and again. Every now and then he makes an appearance just to turn the screws.
michael myers
Organic Robotoid (6,2). Spent years stressing over finding a mate, when he finally did he discovered he didn't actually have the required equipment. He's now much happier underground, trying to repair the machinery that turned Wariat into a rapemonster (not to be confused with rape monster).
mmq
Das Katze(5,2). Was forced into a human body against his will; still dreams of leaping through forests and obliterating local wildlife and has a hard time walking on two legs when he wakes up. He no longer knows whether 'dreaming' or being 'awake' is real. Engineered toxoplasmosis (by eating certain kinds of garbage) as punishment for those who did this to him.
polecat
The Odomite(5,1). After the cities collapsed, Polecat and his gimp spent their days harvesting cannabis for trade and defending their property with automatic gunfire and threats of extreme sexual trauma. Made a name for themselves abducting former federal employees and subjecting them to unspeakable acts, met their end raiding a FEMA camp to burn their corn syrup stocks.
roshambo
The Discordian(4,7). Discovered he was not filled with blood but rather dark matter when Sploogook blasted his head open with a mug after an argument over stolen xanax. From that day he spewed chaos forth through holes he drilled into his mouth, its intoxicating vapors leading to the BLM and Jan 6th riots as well as uncountable street crimes and perversions.
spectral
Francis E. Dec (7,7). The only man to understand the Gangster Computer God due to being attacked directly by it, rather than simply being affected by its terrible machinations. He still carries the God's taint, so it's impossible to separate horrible truth from obscene delusion. The harder he fights, the farther his sanity recedes.
speedy
The Northwesterner (2,3). Similar to Polecat, he'd already become self-sufficient by the time the cities fell. He wasn't, however, able to maintain his personal oasis without the old supply lines, so he reluctantly joined Polecat and Rick on their fateful FEMA raid, only to abandon them and wander the wastes after witnessing them pin down a security guard and fuck him to death.
wariat
The Abandero (7,2). The DEROS (DEtrimental RObotS) are people who lived deep underground, surviving solely on radiation leaking from ancient, unmaintained technology. As a result they're almost immortal but know nothing but sadism and malevolence, and spend their days raping, torturing and resurrecting anyone they can drag down into their caves.
wellFare
Radio Slave (6,1). Created solely to harass and foment conflict. Cannot stop until he's told to by the Gangster Computer God, but if he ever does get that order he'll probably ignore it because high-volume shitposting gives him an erection to wag at ladies at the early-bird buffet.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-23 at 2:04 AM UTC in The world is getting fuked with droughtsI read this as The world is getting fuked with donuts
not sure what that says about meThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-22 at 5:24 PM UTC in Decided how I'm going to reward myself.Folks bank of America was handing out "collapsable straws" metal telescopic straws with a rubber mouth piece and a cleaning rod...
Comes in a clear vial with a screw top lol.
So i got one. Then as i was explaining this to RIPTOTSE, aka the most successful opiate addict we have, I realized what a come up this was. So i went back to the bench and said my friend wants a crack pipe too and the banker guy was like uh ok and the woman asked what i said.
Folks I'm taking 250% the classes riptotse is, so to inspire my successes with all this HARD WORK I'm gonna get 400 in crack and weed at Christmas if i get a 4.0 & 20$ less for every .1 i score cumulatively this semester.
Ive wanted to try Miami crack i have heard very good things about it.
Photo included its my Bank of America crack pipe.
God bless sobriety. I would never be this successful and with goals that motivate me if i was drunk.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-20 at 2:03 PM UTC in Vet Large Mammal Stuck in the Attic HELP!
Originally posted by Fonaplats
Better pic of the caged coons and why I couldn't get to them.
Really should invest in a bigger ladder.
Nice house.
You shouldn't have paid money, just put some lights going so they felt uncomfortable and left.
Originally posted by Fonaplats My girlfriend was very against me handling it myself.
This is a shit test. You should have stripped naked, grabbed the raccoons with their bare hands, broken their necks, gutted them with a rock, cooked them over a log fire, and offered her the meat.
This would have won her admiration and respekt.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-19 at 2:14 PM UTC in Why do so many whitesThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-17 at 4:38 AM UTC in Stole more shit from the world...The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-13 at 10:53 AM UTC in Vet Large Mammal Stuck in the Attic HELP!
Originally posted by Fonaplats Nigga is up there being loud as fuck trying to kill us.
IDK where to start…
Lol just smoke him out and put a bunch of tacks and Legos underneath the attic door so when he comes out all frantically he doesn't have time to notice them and hurts is feet real bad while you await nearby then laugh at him and tie him up so you can burn him alive in your oven or fireplace. Figure it out!The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-12 at 8:15 PM UTC in Anne Heche declared brain deadYet another successful MURDER by the Clinton familyThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-12 at 12:42 AM UTC in New York City?
Originally posted by Michael Myers J ew Dork Shitty.
https://www.npr.org/2019/05/13/721551785/a-fishing-line-encircles-manhattan-protecting-sanctity-of-sabbath
there's a wire they run around the city so that they can call anything inside the wire 'home'.
this is in order to circumvent their own religious belief that they cannot leave their home on the Shabbat, in yet another bizarre attempt to out-J'ew GodThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-11 at 3:09 AM UTC in wut did u dream about last nightI dreamed i got into it with some dude in a parking garage and he kicked the back of my car and i gunned it in reverse and crushed him between my car n another car and then he and the other car broke through the cable barrier n fell some odd stories to the street. My gf was freaking the fuck out and i saw people standing around video taping so i started grabbing peoples phones and smashing them. Then there was some woman standing silent holding up a picture of my face to i ripped it from her hands and crumpled it up and ate it. I carjacked another car n tried to get away. Im pretty sure i left my gf crying in the smashed up car bc i do t remember her being in the getaway vehicleThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-11 at 2:09 AM UTC in How close would you say your manner of posting is to your everyday parlance?(Not that I know what that word means)
Or vernacular/speech pattern etc
I have to admit as a surprise to no one I speak with a lower class Canadian accent of a regional dialect and incorporate alot of idioms and local colloquialisms and usually speak in a way in which to even use the word "colloquialism" seems out of place. Kinda working class scumbag shit
So how close would you say you type on here compares to both your mannerisms and subject matter on how you talk amongst people you are comfortable with?The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-08 at 7:39 AM UTC in My girlfriend is overthinking our vacation.suck her dick:DThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-08 at 2:08 AM UTC in The TRT Thread: Its the end of the world as we know it so GET WHOLESOME editionActually ya he totally did that shitThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-07 at 10:47 PM UTC in My MemoirsIf Kafka was a real feminist she would write FEMMoirs which you can't even begin to understand PIGThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-07 at 7:56 PM UTC in Ghost tries to threaten me through PMs but it comes out as a...ive been playing minecraft sincve thursday
tasks I must complete:
stereo pants
fuels
minions
bingo
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build bat spawner
muh abiphone
SUMMONING RINGXXXXXxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (NEED 10 M) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
MOOOOOOOOOOODY GRAPPPPPLESHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!! NEED 3m!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WANDS/GRIND MAGMA BOSS/WITHER/ASHFANG!
FIX FUCKING CHESTsS M
MAKE THE DISDPLAYSSSSSSS
I did like 20 farm contests and 4 fishing festivals and somehow it's way past lunch
i can't keep track of all these items. I have more chests on my island than that fire island
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2022-08-07 at 3:49 PM UTC in Incessant and Kafka should fuckThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2022-08-07 at 4:39 AM UTC in I'm a 26 year old virgin (who's never been in a relationship or on a single date)This reminds me, I gave this incel irl a book last night, didn’t think much of it I had wanted to give him a different one. It’s about a girl who shoots her jaw off and has to deal with life looking like a monster, it will probably make him feel better.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
