I eat dick pills for the flavor
9/11 was cringe and hack too.
And then there is a dog doing so ething in the background and you're like ayo wut da dog doin 😂😂🤣
2023-01-23 at 8:42 PM UTC
in
Create a superhero
Part 1: Chong Ping, Master Of The Sun
Before he attained immortality, Chong Ping was an ancient Chinese scholar and scientist in ancient China during the ancient Chinese era and he specialized in the study of optics.
His specialization was in the creation of lenses by the use of flowing water. In doing so he created many knock-on technological advances such as for irrigation and water elevation to maintain a constant flow in his water lens machines.
While his scientific achievements were impressive, he wanted to create larger engineering super projects that would require an impractical quantity of resources and thus had to justify them to the emperor as having implications for military research.
To demonstrate the military potential of his research, he gained an impressive initial grant and command over a waterfall that was famous for a special alignment with the sun on a particular day that had come to be known as the Ching Festival.
He carved the waterfall to form a giant solar lens that would create a solar death beam on the day of the Ching Festival, focused on a point before the waterfall.
Construction of the lens was complete and the day of the festival drew near however Chong Ping's rival scientist Xing Jing (who was the leading authority in mirrors to rival Chong Ping's advanced understanding of lenses and would later come to be known as the Master Of The Moon) framed him for solar rape and stealing energy from the Sky God Quang Ji, angering him which would surely cause drought in the following season.
The Emperor was greatly displeased and sentenced Chong Ping to the ironic punishment of being fried by his own death ray on the day of the Ching Festival.
Chong Ping 's hands and legs were bound and he was placed upon the stone pedestal where his own marvel and wonder would turn him to ash.
Chong Ping waited like this for eight hours. He was placed upon the pedestal when it was still dark and watched the legendary Ching Sunrise from the greatest of all views, through the thin focusing mist of the waterfall. He watched the sun creep over the horizon and turn the sky and the water and the mist around him to a brilliant dance of opalescent fire and slowly ascend towards it zenith, where it would turn him to a cinder.
But as it approached its peak and Chong Ping began to tremble and convulse and shriek and wail through his bindings for mercy and for reprieve, he was once again humbled by Quang Ji's announcement; "none but I can dispense the fury of the sky!"
Quang Ji spoke this in a clap of thunder, as a storm erupted and obscured the sky and the sun that hung in it.
And so it was, by cloud, that Chong Ping's calculations were thwarted and his life was spared.
But so also was brutally exposed the flaw in his technology and the hubris of his methodology: ultimately, it could work only by the favor of the sky but no man under heaven could control Quang Ji's favor.
Or so it was stated in his tribunal, as he was sentenced to another execution, this time for his profligate misuse of public funds for his failed project.
Chong Ping disagreed but the court did not weigh upon matters of science. Only of legality.
In his prison cell while awaiting his execution, a hooded and masked stranger came to visit Chong Ping in the dead of night.
"Chong Ping!" He whispered. "Could the artifice of man produce a bright enough lantern?"
Chong Ping's eyes widened. Even with his voice muffled, it could only be Xing Jing.
"Yes!" He exclaimed, but then the realization came to him we with his rival's smile "... But I will need your mirrors!"
2023-01-23 at 8:02 PM UTC
in
Create a superhero
He likes ramen cuz he is also Ramen Bowlman
You should go atop a very tall building to bank some gravitational potential energy then cash it all in for kinetic energy in one bulk sum via freefall
