It was freaky. People said they were gonna beat me up when I turned 18, so I asked her if I would die then. I got all these cards talking about endings and in the centre was the death card. Richard, a queer, got a lot of wands.
My friends when I was a teen were mostly Wiccan. In the estate where I first lived, one of them used to live there. We would do tarot cards at her house. Maybe it's her I'm trying to get to when I go through the crystal cave. I wonder if it was astral projection that brought me to her estate at night.
When I meditate I find myself on a hill and monks are about to chase me so I have to run. I use a broomstick. Fly over the ocean to play chess on a pirate ship or into the woods where there's a cottage with a deity I ask for help. If I go through the crystal cave as directed I find myself in the estate I first lived, it's always night. That's all I've explored.
One of the things I meditated on was this guy I wanted, and he ended up molesting me. Maybe that's why I didn't try it again.
Wondering why the name morshoo sounds familiar. If not Bradley then whomst. -_-
I had a crush on this girl when I was 18. Blonde hair blue eyes she lived in Richmond VA. Anyway she said she never wanted children and she voted for Trump in 2016. I'm wondering how she's freaking out now.
I feel like the sudden sobriety won't come until the anxiety has been eliminated. The gin hasn't done its job yet.
Sometimes I'll be paralytic drunk then suddenly sober, or seemingly. I wonder what causes it and if I need it rn. Ik people with split personalities can change their body chemistry like that blind woman whom had an alter that could see. My vision changed once, needed glasses then didn't. But I'm not sure if I really have a split personality and if I do it couldn't be that extreme, so what else could cause my sudden sobriety? Of suddenly being able to get up when I've been paralytic.
ok I safely cut the lamb. Now I'm thinking about how strange it is that ppl say I'm retarded when all the people I've been close to were above average.
Whiles I'm taking too much time cans someones recommend me something to watch for when I get back? Preferably anime
Need to take off skinny jeans before can't
Realising I'm not going to get anything productive done today. But okay with that because I need to socialise to be healthy.
I'll just sober up and cook somthing. I've been awake idk 6 hours, only thing I've had is houmous and breadsticks and I haven't even finished that.
Seriously what am I going to eat.
