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The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition

  1. Oh yeah, I took 1.4g tia today and actually felt a full opi buzz, or at least as good as tia is likely to get me. Taking 1.5 grams at a time makes it way more expensive than other opiates so its kind of pointless to buy more. I felt pre good
  2. i had to get narcan'd when i took like 800mg lips turned spblue
  3. I am not a victim of incest all I did was unregister from the slippery game


    I woke up at 4:30 today trying to dive-catch a baseball out of bed, and I'm the most rested I've been in a really long time
  4. Ghost Black Hole

    ⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠒⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢨
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣗⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⣠⣀⣀⡀⠄
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    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⡤⠄⠁⠄⠈⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠻⣿⡄
    ⣿⣿⣿⠋⣼⣷⠄⣷⣾⠛⡉⠉⡓⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡤⠤⠤⠤⢤⡀⠁
    ⣿⣿⠇⠄⣿⣿⢰⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣷⣶⣛⣩⣤⣄⠹⣤⣤⣀⣂⣠⣿⢰
    ⣿⡟⠄⠄⣿⡟⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾
    ⣿⠁⠄⠄⠘⢿⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣾
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    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣏⢻⣦⣤⡘⠷⣴⣶⣧⣄⡠⠄⢀⣀⠏⠄⠄⠄
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    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣧
  5. Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 rich people become beyond beta by consuming gold in their diet as a daily supplement which gives them supra-human abilities

    they all eat food laced with gold, that is their secret to success

    Then why are all goldschlager consumers morons?

    Originally posted by -SpectraL Most spoiled rich people don't like needles, so they prefer the oral route.

    Epinephrine is not orally bioavailable

    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 i had to get narcan'd when i took like 800mg lips turned spblue


    See this is what I don't fucking get. I took 5g and got nothing but a piss covered carpet and a court date
  6. Originally posted by DietPiano Oh yeah, I took 1.4g tia today and actually felt a full opi buzz, or at least as good as tia is likely to get me. Taking 1.5 grams at a time makes it way more expensive than other opiates so its kind of pointless to buy more. I felt pre good

    So much for the "best rehab in the country"
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  7. Also, most of you will never get to experience the pure ecstasy of putting on a pair of clean underwear fresh from the dryer after having been forced to wear pissed-in clothes to work for a week

    I honestly almost came
  8. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Ghost

    ⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠒⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢨
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣗⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⣠⣀⣀⡀⠄
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣄⣀⣀⣀⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣹⣿⣿⡇⠄
    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⡤⠄⠁⠄⠈⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠻⣿⡄
    ⣿⣿⣿⠋⣼⣷⠄⣷⣾⠛⡉⠉⡓⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡤⠤⠤⠤⢤⡀⠁
    ⣿⣿⠇⠄⣿⣿⢰⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣷⣶⣛⣩⣤⣄⠹⣤⣤⣀⣂⣠⣿⢰
    ⣿⡟⠄⠄⣿⡟⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾
    ⣿⠁⠄⠄⠘⢿⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣾
    ⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⠋⠉⠛⠛⠻⣿⡿⠿⠻⠿⠿⠿⣿⡟⠈⢹
    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣏⢻⣦⣤⡘⠷⣴⣶⣧⣄⡠⠄⢀⣀⠏⠄⠄⠄
    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣄⠈⠄⢻⣿⣿⣶⡦⠤⠭⠤⠤⣾⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣧

    Cool ASCII bro is that BigLuigi
  9. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Jυicebox Also, most of you will never get to experience the pure ecstasy of putting on a pair of clean underwear fresh from the dryer after having been forced to wear pissed-in clothes to work for a week

    I honestly almost came

    The majority of the uplifting element of this experience seems to be due to relief from having to wear piss soaked clothes for a week.
  10. Ghost Black Hole
    Originally posted by Common De-mominator Cool ASCII bro is that BigLuigi

    yes
  11. Originally posted by Common De-mominator The majority of the uplifting element of this experience seems to be due to relief from having to wear piss soaked clothes for a week.

    Yeah pretty much

    No money for laundromat=no clean clothes

    I did the best I could hand washing them but industrial substances don't come out that easily

    Been in alcohol withdrawal the last few days too so I was sweating the fuck out of them at the same time
  12. I'm honestly starting to feel really bad for my organs

    They've worked hard as fuck to keep me alive through some wild shit and yet here I am still showing them absolutely no gratitude
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  13. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    I'm like a 7 on the paranoia scale without substances. When I'm sober everyone has as fucked up a mind as I do. Chinese people are conspiring against me and if I recognize someone I kno they're immediately texting people who hate me and there s going to be a situation when I step outside. Every car is an undercover and the worst thing is about to happen all the time
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  14. Needledick Needledick Needledick motherfucker [mulishly down your brachydactylia]
    Originally posted by Sudo I'm like a 7 on the paranoia scale without substances. When I'm sober everyone has as fucked up a mind as I do. Chinese people are conspiring against me and if I recognize someone I kno they're immediately texting people who hate me and there s going to be a situation when I step outside. Every car is an undercover and the worst thing is about to happen all the time

    Read up on gangstalking
  15. Needledick Needledick Needledick motherfucker [mulishly down your brachydactylia]
    I think I'm gonna get some gas relief tablets today. I've walked on thin ice having to fart at work for the last time .
  16. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    unless you work in a small room with a bunch of other people and are constantly releasing nerve agents, I'd doubt most people would notice or care
  17. Lanny Bird of Courage
    Pistol drawn, her boyfriend got me paranoid
  18. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    Makeup on, shawty suckin like an Altoid
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  19. Originally posted by DietPiano Lanny is fucking gay

    Originally posted by DietPiano Lanny is fucking gay

    Originally posted by DietPiano Lanny is fucking gay
  20. Originally posted by Solstice So much for the "best rehab in the country"

    if this is an emergency hang up and dial 911

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