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The Retarded Thread: Get Rekt, Faggot!

  1. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Originally posted by Sophie I was considering it but i decided that because you planned to make a thread i would wait it out.

    What happened?

    Maybeit just seems more hilarious to me than it should be. You can be the judge.

    I was out delivering cookies to my peoples, and one guy hops in the car, and it becomes apparent he doesn't have cash. Im like "Dude I really gotta go. I wasted all this gas to come down here, and I was supposed to be downtown 15 min ago." And he says "HOLD ON MAN hold on hold on.... You said let you know If I got anything good, right?" And im thinking "Yeah another ipad or a watch or something is always cool". And he starts unwrapping a shirt that he pulled out of his backpack, and then he just lays it in between us.

    I lean over, and switch on the map light. "Where is it?" I ask. I assume since he wrapped it so safely, mustve been something expensive or fragile. I start looking between the seats to see if it dropped somewhere. "What you mean?" he says... "I know youve seen Home Alone."

    wut. wut. WUT.

    "WUT THE FUUUUUUUCK are you talking about?" I query, loudly?

    He gestures. "Thats McCauly Culkin's sweater from the movie, bro".

    :appropriate meme face:

    He starts trying to pull up google pictures on his phone. "Dude this would be worth like $5000 at an auction easy. Especially this time of year you know? Its a Christmas movie?"

    Im pretty speechless, but I finally convey that I dont have a ton of information as to the long term outlook on the appreciation/depreciation of McCauly Culkin sweatshirts, so I drop him off and head home.

    In retrospect, I feel like I shouldve given him something just so I could create a sort of "Hall of Fame" of things people have tried to trade. Just a big glass frame with "Kevin McAllister's sweatshirt from Hole Alone" in quotation marks, and the value traded for below.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by CASPER Maybeit just seems more hilarious to me than it should be. You can be the judge.

    I was out delivering cookies to my peoples, and one guy hops in the car, and it becomes apparent he doesn't have cash. Im like "Dude I really gotta go. I wasted all this gas to come down here, and I was supposed to be downtown 15 min ago." And he says "HOLD ON MAN hold on hold on…. You said let you know If I got anything good, right?" And im thinking "Yeah another ipad or a watch or something is always cool". And he starts unwrapping a shirt that he pulled out of his backpack, and then he just lays it in between us.

    I lean over, and switch on the map light. "Where is it?" I ask. I assume since he wrapped it so safely, mustve been something expensive or fragile. I start looking between the seats to see if it dropped somewhere. "What you mean?" he says… "I know youve seen Home Alone."

    wut. wut. WUT.

    "WUT THE FUUUUUUUCK are you talking about?" I query, loudly?

    He gestures. "Thats McCauly Culkin's sweater from the movie, bro".

    :appropriate meme face:

    He starts trying to pull up google pictures on his phone. "Dude this would be worth like $5000 at an auction easy. Especially this time of year you know? Its a Christmas movie?"

    Im pretty speechless, but I finally convey that I dont have a ton of information as to the long term outlook on the appreciation/depreciation of McCauly Culkin sweatshirts, so I drop him off and head home.

    In retrospect, I feel like I shouldve given him something just so I could create a sort of "Hall of Fame" of things people have tried to trade. Just a big glass frame with "Kevin McAllister's sweatshirt from Hole Alone" in quotation marks, and the value traded for below.

    The last part was pretty funny. And yeah breh, you should have just told him:"Look, i don't really care about the shirt, but since you a trill ass nigga here's a lil' sum sum. Now scram."

    And then frame it.
  3. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    I still might hit him up. Pretty sure he still has it, considering im 99.99999% sure that its just something he found in the street, or that some 10 year old left at the bus stop.

    Who knows though. Could be "legit".
  4. RisiR † 29 Autism
    I'm going to murder someone.
  5. RisiR, can I make a suggestion?
  6. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Make it me. I want to be murdered. I won't even press charges.
  7. RisiR † 29 Autism
    Where are the EA headquarters? Be there and you'll be gone forever. I can't even... beginn... to describe how fucking retarded....

    I want to cry right now. I just want to curl up and die crying. Then I want to come back as imortal merchant of death and reap the souls of those fucking EA cunts. I'd let their entire families die painful, terrible deaths if I could. You fucking...

    I'm getting fucked over by my own AI teammates, EA. You fuckniggers. It's happening way too often that a fucking retarded AI shitnigger tackles someone in the box and I give up penalties without doing anything. Fix this, please. I can't....
  8. RisiR † 29 Autism
    Shut up. They will read it once I've blown myself up. Hahahahaha...


    Yea, fuck this. I'm mad. I have to play six billion matches to stay competitive and the game is sometimes just so fucking retarded.
  9. D4NG0 motherfucker
    Holy fuck are you still mad over a videogame?
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  10. RisiR † 29 Autism
    Again.
  11. RisiR † 29 Autism
    I'm mad again.
  12. D4NG0 motherfucker
    lol
  13. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I ordered three double cheeseburgers ketchup only last week from burger King, bitch REPEATED my order, then i get home and see they have pickles and mustard, so I call and complain for the first time (this has happened multiple times over the last year), and the fucker says he'll send me coupons for the burgers, and a week later and I have no fucking coupons, so I'm sure he just LIED, and if THAT isn't something to get worked up about and want to MURDER, I don't know what is.

    OH, YOU SAID KETCHUP ONLY? DID I CATCH THAT RIGHT SIR??

    YES!! KETCHUP ONLY!!

    KETCHUP ONLY IT IS THEN SIR. PLEASE PULL FORWARD!

    *GET BURGERS. MUSTARD AND PICKLES*

    :rageface:

    Sacks of SHIT!!!!!!
  14. RisiR † 29 Autism
  15. bling bling Dark Matter
    dont eat 3 birgers wtf
  16. Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by mmQ I ordered three double cheeseburgers ketchup only last week from burger King, bitch REPEATED my order, then i get home and see they have pickles and mustard, so I call and complain for the first time (this has happened multiple times over the last year), and the fucker says he'll send me coupons for the burgers, and a week later and I have no fucking coupons, so I'm sure he just LIED, and if THAT isn't something to get worked up about and want to MURDER, I don't know what is.

    OH, YOU SAID KETCHUP ONLY? DID I CATCH THAT RIGHT SIR??

    YES!! KETCHUP ONLY!!

    KETCHUP ONLY IT IS THEN SIR. PLEASE PULL FORWARD!

    *GET BURGERS. MUSTARD AND PICKLES*

    :rageface:

    Sacks of SHIT!!!!!!

    Unbelievable. Absolutely disgusting.
  17. mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    Originally posted by mmQ I ordered three double cheeseburgers ketchup only last week from burger King, bitch REPEATED my order, then i get home and see they have pickles and mustard, so I call and complain for the first time (this has happened multiple times over the last year), and the fucker says he'll send me coupons for the burgers, and a week later and I have no fucking coupons, so I'm sure he just LIED, and if THAT isn't something to get worked up about and want to MURDER, I don't know what is.

    OH, YOU SAID KETCHUP ONLY? DID I CATCH THAT RIGHT SIR??

    YES!! KETCHUP ONLY!!

    KETCHUP ONLY IT IS THEN SIR. PLEASE PULL FORWARD!

    *GET BURGERS. MUSTARD AND PICKLES*

    :rageface:

    Sacks of SHIT!!!!!!

    Burn down the establishment
  18. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Thanks for your support I've decided to just pray for them and forgive.

    Today is a day the Lord hath made. I shall rejoice and be glad in it, ya know?
  19. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by bling bling dont eat 3 birgers wtf

    I'll eat your birger.
  20. Can those of you without avatars get an avatar already

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