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The Retarded Thread: Get Rekt, Faggot!
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2017-11-10 at 1:06 AM UTC
Originally posted by LegalizeSpiritualDiscovery Bought a buncha books with my poker money.
I Ching
Dune
Neuromancer
Cat's Cradle
World Without End
I, Ching, take Dune, to be my lawfully wedded Cat, to have and to Neuromance, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until World Without End, so help me God.
Just kidding. -
2017-11-10 at 1:48 AM UTC
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2017-11-10 at 6:03 AM UTC
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2017-11-10 at 6:09 AM UTCI take a deep breath and remind myself of what is real and what is only dream stuff, as the head of my old school teacher forms in the clouds, her tight curls framing square glasses and thin lips.
‘What have you made of yourself?’ She asks.
But I don’t answer. Partly because I don’t have a good answer, but mostly because I refuse to talk to her in cloud form.
If she really wants to talk to me, she can bloody well come in person and say what she wants to say to my face.
Beside my teacher, the chubby cheeks of my old kindergarten friend gather. He still four years old. He will be four years old forever; he was run over by a bus.
‘You could have told me not to fetch the ball,’ he says. His voice is shrill. I don’t remember whether it has always been like that or whether it’s the clouds distorting it.
‘I was four,’ I sigh. It still feels like a bad excuse after all these years. Almost as bad as “I was drunk”. And right on que, my father’s head pops up.
‘Where is grandmother’s painting?’
‘I did get a lot of money for it.’
‘And with all that money, you will be able to buy her resurrection?’
‘I’ll never find the man; he just turned up at my party, real late. He must be some friend of a friend of a friend or something, and he paid in cash, right there. I’ll never find him.’ I close my eyes and massage my temples; something isn’t right. I feel the grass beside me and the butt of the joint.
I have to remember what’s real. -
2017-11-10 at 6:17 AM UTCMan this music makes me sad.
Mostly because it reminds me i will never live in an anime and have a loli harem and go on cool adventures and stuff. -
2017-11-10 at 6:36 AM UTCyour life its an aname its ur anime when u wale up and build up zoobies thats ur intro
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2017-11-10 at 6:36 AM UTCwake*
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2017-11-10 at 6:36 AM UTC
Originally posted by Vlodge Zponge Boiiiizzz how many times a week can i get drunk without becoming an alchie?
im about to chug a 120oz can of malt liqour and i've gotten drunk a few times this week. it's not my drug of choice which has been smoking weed, but my guy didn't have anything. i need some sort of intoxicating substance so this'll substitute for weed today, but im gonna make sure not to drink friday, saturday, or sunday
also i just failed the captcha like 14 times in a row fuck this bullshit
I don't know but what you're doing is something listed on the alcoholic side of a 'valley chart' that's sort of standardized in a lotnod treatments as a basis for knowing where your addictions are at or may be headed.
Obviously it's pretty self-explanatory as it pertains to substance use (and no I don't mean a 5-finger Al Bundy bargain from the Dollar Store[though that actually probably could apply). I think it's listed on the chart as 'has made or makes deals with others or himself, regarding time spent using substance (ie I'll only drink on weekends, from now on I'll only buy a 1/2 Oz of meth per month, or I'll stop attacking dad with clothes everytime I see him as long as you give me money.)
Also part of the 5 stages of grief as you're aware, which treatment centers have adopted as 5 stages of addiction.
What am I saying here? You bargained alcohol, therefore you're an alcoholic, according to a chart one individual invented back in the day. -
2017-11-10 at 6:40 AM UTCI don't bargain anything. I just take whatever the fuck i feel like and let future me deal with the consequences. And future me is pretty adapt at doing so even though future me doesn't always like it. This has historically been the case.
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2017-11-10 at 6:41 AM UTC
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2017-11-10 at 6:42 AM UTCiys friday my donts
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2017-11-10 at 6:52 AM UTCI had a weird dream earlier, i was at a beach, and on that beach was a construction site for some reason. As i walked around exploring the place i came upon what i can only describe as an industrial elevator shaft. The elevator wasn't there, it was up somewhere but there in the middle of this shaft thing was sat a boy. I spoke to him for a little while then went on my way. Then later when i came back to the location it turned out the elevator had fallen onto the boy. I remember there were a lot of people there trying to lift the thing just in case he was still alive. Well, they managed to lift it, but the boy was dead. It was like a scene straight out of a picture of one of those gore sites. It was mildly disturbing.
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2017-11-10 at 7:15 AM UTC
Originally posted by Sophie I had a weird dream earlier, i was at a beach, and on that beach was a construction site for some reason. As i walked around exploring the place i came upon what i can only describe as an industrial elevator shaft. The elevator wasn't there, it was up somewhere but there in the middle of this shaft thing was sat a boy. I spoke to him for a little while then went on my way. Then later when i came back to the location it turned out the elevator had fallen onto the boy. I remember there were a lot of people there trying to lift the thing just in case he was still alive. Well, they managed to lift it, but the boy was dead. It was like a scene straight out of a picture of one of those gore sites. It was mildly disturbing.
Was it high or low tide? -
2017-11-10 at 4:18 PM UTC
Originally posted by WhiskeyPhoenix What the fuck do you care anymore? Did you not get your knife and shit back that I sent you? Fuck off and move on with your life.
Why do I care? I don't, I stopped caring shortly after you pulled your shit, I was curious. lol yeah, tell me to fuck off like I did anything to you. What about the instruments? I didn't even ask for them, but you kept insisting you'd send them, especially the uk, which was just my son's left with you to play with until you got strings for your guitar. (which FYI, neither were stolen, but guess you like spewing shit, because you're immature, and butthurt... just look at all the butthurt coming from you- exactly what did I do to you? lol yep. You can't say anything 'til after you did your shit, and even then, I didn't do anything even near what you did, and am grown enough to apologize, and admit me saying that to her was wrong.)
Originally posted by 霍比特人说中文不好 Yo, what's the hold up on you? We've all been waiting over a month here. You going to do it or what?
Unlike PoC here (from his own account, he doesn't want to live, he's done, experienced enough and doesn't want more, and why I asked what's going on with that, curious if there's another cry for help/attention in the near future), I would really prefer not to die. I would prefer to not be in pain, and suffering, I would prefer to not have so much shit fucked in my life, I would prefer for my life to not have so many things going on that makes dying to be a better option than living. I've never said otherwise on that, as bad as I've ever been. I'm not afraid to admit I am scared to make that leap either. I've only ever been suicidal when I have felt that I can't do anything to correct and/or there is no hope for my life and quality thereof to improve in a significant way.
I often feel manipulated by people I care about in regards to suicide, and it has been a large reason I am still here. I've been embracing my loneliness, and isolation more though. I'm doing things I would have never done before. Letting go of people I would have never let go of before. Who knows. I've made attempts that should have done me in over the last year, and I still am baffled at how I'm here, especially considering no medical intervention was involved,I should by all rights be dead, but as it is, my fears regarding the act are more so based on the fear of fucking up. I made one mistake as a teenager which landed me in the psychward, I will not let that happen again.
I would say I need help, but there is no help. I just have to internalize this more. I've pushed the only real person I had away from me recently, so that definitely should help in my cause to end my suffering, one way or another.
I don't even know what your problem is, §m£ÂgØL. I've left you alone, and only at your request, did I speak to you about anything, and even took my time to try and help, and offered up my time, and information to help you figure out the situation and clear my name. I have more shit in my life I am dealing with at the moment to even pay thought to your bullshit, much less send you stupid threats. God knows it was probably fuckhead, but it well could have been PoC, but being your memory sucks too, it could have been anyone, honestly, the more I've considered it. I don't know, and I don't care. I stopped caring the moment the moment you showed your true manipulative traits again, I was stupid enough to ignore, trying to give benefit of the doubt. You took a conversation, where I stated my opinion, with some joking around, and my attempt to explain my joking wasn't meant to be mean or to pick on you, just I had an opinion, and you disagreed. Nothing I said was meant to attack you, but when I tried to be nice, that's what I got in return, personal, deep cutting attacks on my character, taking the same thing I said, being used to hurt me, when all it was said was to try and explain my opinion wasn't negative of you in that conversation. Why? I don't know. WHat did I do about it? Say I no longer gave a fuck about your problems or care about who was harassing you, and didn't want to talk any longer. Even that I thought could at least be taken amicably (ending contact), but nope. Anytime I've had shit to do with you, I am damned if I do, and damned if I don't, especially with dealing with all that shit.
Whether you think you have a mental illness or not, or even my opinion of that, I truly think you need therapy. You'd likely benefit greatly from it, in moving on from the past, and letting go of the negative emotions you like to carry around with you. I don't care what you think of me, I give two shits to your opinions anymore, but it's pretty obvious you're still traumatized, and stuck in the past. -
2017-11-10 at 4:35 PM UTC
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2017-11-10 at 5:59 PM UTCFuck off and mainline a marcaine shot
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2017-11-10 at 7:02 PM UTC
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2017-11-10 at 7:57 PM UTC
Originally posted by hydromorphone Why do I care? I don't, I stopped caring shortly after you pulled your shit, I was curious. lol yeah, tell me to fuck off like I did anything to you. What about the instruments? I didn't even ask for them, but you kept insisting you'd send them, especially the uk, which was just my son's left with you to play with until you got strings for your guitar. (which FYI, neither were stolen, but guess you like spewing shit, because you're immature, and butthurt… just look at all the butthurt coming from you- exactly what did I do to you? lol yep. You can't say anything 'til after you did your shit, and even then, I didn't do anything even near what you did, and am grown enough to apologize, and admit me saying that to her was wrong.)
Unlike PoC here (from his own account, he doesn't want to live, he's done, experienced enough and doesn't want more, and why I asked what's going on with that, curious if there's another cry for help/attention in the near future), I would really prefer not to die. I would prefer to not be in pain, and suffering, I would prefer to not have so much shit fucked in my life, I would prefer for my life to not have so many things going on that makes dying to be a better option than living. I've never said otherwise on that, as bad as I've ever been. I'm not afraid to admit I am scared to make that leap either. I've only ever been suicidal when I have felt that I can't do anything to correct and/or there is no hope for my life and quality thereof to improve in a significant way.
I often feel manipulated by people I care about in regards to suicide, and it has been a large reason I am still here. I've been embracing my loneliness, and isolation more though. I'm doing things I would have never done before. Letting go of people I would have never let go of before. Who knows. I've made attempts that should have done me in over the last year, and I still am baffled at how I'm here, especially considering no medical intervention was involved,I should by all rights be dead, but as it is, my fears regarding the act are more so based on the fear of fucking up. I made one mistake as a teenager which landed me in the psychward, I will not let that happen again.
I would say I need help, but there is no help. I just have to internalize this more. I've pushed the only real person I had away from me recently, so that definitely should help in my cause to end my suffering, one way or another.
I don't even know what your problem is, §m£ÂgØL. I've left you alone, and only at your request, did I speak to you about anything, and even took my time to try and help, and offered up my time, and information to help you figure out the situation and clear my name. I have more shit in my life I am dealing with at the moment to even pay thought to your bullshit, much less send you stupid threats. God knows it was probably fuckhead, but it well could have been PoC, but being your memory sucks too, it could have been anyone, honestly, the more I've considered it. I don't know, and I don't care. I stopped caring the moment the moment you showed your true manipulative traits again, I was stupid enough to ignore, trying to give benefit of the doubt. You took a conversation, where I stated my opinion, with some joking around, and my attempt to explain my joking wasn't meant to be mean or to pick on you, just I had an opinion, and you disagreed. Nothing I said was meant to attack you, but when I tried to be nice, that's what I got in return, personal, deep cutting attacks on my character, taking the same thing I said, being used to hurt me, when all it was said was to try and explain my opinion wasn't negative of you in that conversation. Why? I don't know. WHat did I do about it? Say I no longer gave a fuck about your problems or care about who was harassing you, and didn't want to talk any longer. Even that I thought could at least be taken amicably (ending contact), but nope. Anytime I've had shit to do with you, I am damned if I do, and damned if I don't, especially with dealing with all that shit.
Whether you think you have a mental illness or not, or even my opinion of that, I truly think you need therapy. You'd likely benefit greatly from it, in moving on from the past, and letting go of the negative emotions you like to carry around with you. I don't care what you think of me, I give two shits to your opinions anymore, but it's pretty obvious you're still traumatized, and stuck in the past.
C A L L E D I T -
2017-11-10 at 10:28 PM UTC
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2017-11-10 at 11:08 PM UTCbaby animals are the true enemy of mankind
