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I'm about to go jail

  1. #41
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Totse 2001 does this make alcohol?

    No. It's just an internal smuggling ploy. You can also sneak meat out of the guards' freezer locker, like sirloin steaks, and roll them up and bag them and sink them in the coffee and tea jugs to get them over to the dorm. Then you get a guy from the kitchen to cook them for you later, when you know security will be lax.
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  2. #42
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by -SpectraL No. It's just an internal smuggling ploy. You can also sneak meat out of the guards' freezer locker, like sirloin steaks, and roll them up and bag them and sink them in the coffee and tea jugs to get them over to the dorm. Then you get a guy from the kitchen to cook them for you later, when you know security will be lax.

    This makes literally no sense with how jails are set up. Sure you can get a kitchen worker to do you a favor, but smuggling in cooked steaks and not having a CO notice is impossible
  3. #43
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by mmQ …not having a CO notice is impossible

    Mostly true, but there are more than a few screws who bring in hash and pills for people on the sly. A lot of them aren't angels themselves.
  4. #44
    Helladamnleet African Astronaut [impartially tyrannize that lentinus]
    Originally posted by Totse 2001 You're a chick aren't you? they don't have that in guy-town

    No. I'm not a chick.
  5. #45
    HampTheToker African Astronaut
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Mostly true, but there are more than a few screws who bring in hash and pills for people on the sly. A lot of them aren't angels themselves.

    You talk like you heard this on an episode of Oz or some such shit.

    >No one calls them screws anymore.

    >County jailers don't risk their jobs for short timers.

    >Trustees are the only ones doing any smuggling.

    >No one smuggles fucking orange juice.

    >You've never been locked up a day in your life.
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  6. #46
    HampTheToker African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Helladamnleet No. I'm not a chick.

    Those are some nice boobs you got, tho...
  7. #47
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by HampTheToker You talk like you heard this on an episode of Oz or some such shit.

    >No one calls them screws anymore.

    >County jailers don't risk their jobs for short timers.

    >Trustees are the only ones doing any smuggling.

    >No one smuggles fucking orange juice.

    >You've never been locked up a day in your life.

    You don't scare me in the least.
  8. #48
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    Originally posted by antinatalism jail-time is a great opportunity to make friends that can last for the rest of your life, cheer up m8

    never make friends in jail, well not make friends, just drop them the moment you walk out the gate. those friends are the type that will fuck you over one day.




    .
  9. #49
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    In the old days, if a guy came onto the range and tried to stay away from everyone and didn't talk, he would be labelled a range rat and get beat up by four or five guys, then ejected from population.
  10. #50
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Originally posted by -SpectraL In the old days, if a guy came onto the range and tried to stay away from everyone and didn't talk, he would be labelled a range rat and get beat up by four or five guys, then ejected from population.

    - Bill the Range Rat
  11. #51
    hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Spec is being retarded again. I fucking PERSONALLY KNOW some prison guards DO fucking smuggle in drugs/other hard to get items for inmates, for a price. You always find SOMEONE who's on the take. Trustee's are NOT the one's bringing in drugs for the most part, maybe some, but in prison, not County, their contact with people is a lot more limited- they do roadcrew shit, where as in this case they worked semi-close to the public. Sure, they get a measure of slack compared to the average inmate (at our county dump there was this one nice trustee there, he'd help us unload and shit... I'd always leave him between 5-10 cigarettes. Would at least leave 1-3 for other trustee's when he wasn't in the general area still though) but not fucking like Spec thinks the word "trustee" means... I knew a lot of the prison guards, personally, who'd bring in shit and make a fucking fortune- they're the people who get the least checks when coming in and leaving work.
  12. #52
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    You misunderstood




    .
  13. #53
    hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    what'd you get busted for spec- tell us prison stories, since you have suggested heavily you know what you're talking about (and you don't, just like with CompSci, just so you can feel like you fit in)? Come on, tell us what you got busted for, years served, and during what years (since you keep saying "back in the day"). Sure, every place is different, but you just sound like you're talking out your ass and likely just got put in the drunk tank a couple times as a teenager/young adult, and want to pretend you know wtf you're talking about...

    Fucking orange juice... lol... that's fucking retarded, you know.
  14. #54
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by greenplastic Can't you just like chill in jail? I've never been but I've known quite a few people who have and they haven't said any of this shit about not being able to look at anyone or getting your ass whooped on a regular basis.

    Yes. It's a bunch of people doing short time, and a few waiting to go to prison. Sure you get some rough types, but it's mostly just dudes playing cards, watching TV, reading, and sleeping.

    Yeah we might make fun of the kid that sleeps or stays in his cell the majority of the day, but that's about it. Nobody goes and beats the fuck out of him, that just lands you in a higher security area with less freedom, and doesn't really prove a point to anyone.

    Jail time is boring, but easy.
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  15. #55
    bling bling Dark Matter
    build up a shank work on busting the window out
  16. #56
    infinityshock Black Hole
    Originally posted by Totse 2001 I spoke of this before on here. He unbuckled my seatbelt and then zig zag in and out of lanes throwing me back and forth while playing death core as loud as possible on the radio. Hispanic cop I think

    pussy. I do that sort of thing for fun.
  17. #57
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    The kidiots get the "blanket treatment". As soon as the retard goes to sleep, they get a blanket thrown over their head and then they are punched, kicked and pummeled by a dozen guys, put into a coma, and then have to go PC.
  18. #58
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    Originally posted by -SpectraL The kidiots get the "blanket treatment". As soon as the retard goes to sleep, they get a blanket thrown over their head and then they are punched, kicked and pummeled by a dozen guys, put into a coma, and then have to go PC.

    B- for attendance
  19. #59
    AnonymAce Yung Blood
    Yes just duct tape your phone between dick and nuts sack and continue posting
  20. #60
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    They check your dick and nuts. You'd have to hoop the phone.
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