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Posts by Symbiote
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2018-07-19 at 5:51 AM UTC in Reinventing Myself?
Originally posted by Zanick Reinventing yourself is very simple, if you know the right way to do it and follow instructions carefully.
First, you have to find another man to be your new dad. Make sure he's compatible with your mom and then introduce them during her ovulation. Suggest they get dinner, and that night, wait until they've left on their date and then set up secret cameras and a baby monitor to record your mom's bedroom. You're going to want to remember this night one day, so make sure the angle is perfect for the cameras. Then all you need is a fork, and I'll get to why shortly.
I should add that, if you haven't already been slipping fertility herbs into her food for a couple of weeks, this isn't going to work. So this burly father-to-be brings your mom home, hopefully very drunk, and you hide somewhere in the house where you'll hear them doing the deed, but where they won't hear your baby monitor receiving sounds of them having sex. As soon as you hear him come over the baby monitor, start counting down backwards from 100.
When you get to 26, jam the fork into an electrical outlet. This will make your soul take the place of the one driving the fastest semen. After you've successfully infiltrated your whore mother's womb for the second time, give yourself a pat on the back! You've just reinvented yourself.
BEST POST EVER TIMES ONE HUNDRED HUNDRED H8UNDREDS -
2018-07-19 at 5:49 AM UTC in Matching paintjob for your boats and your truckHis nicknme is Red.
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2018-07-06 at 6:04 AM UTC in Post photos things 2 cheer u ^
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2018-07-03 at 12:43 PM UTC in The word "Hack"
Originally posted by Lanny example: spectral is a talentless hack who couldn't hack his way out of a wet paper bag with a chainsaw.
<|-|4x0r> IlL h4X0R yOo
<frosty> Wow.. 31337 m0f0z!
<frosty> I should feel privaledged.. shouldn't I?
<Hax0rWang> FaG QQQQ bizATCHHHH i Own jedi err U
<|-|4x0r> EmAnuAl cOuLdnT hAx His Way oUt of A pApeR bAg
<syringe> no one could hack their way out of a paper bag
[frosty 14VERSION]
<|-|4x0r> NoT iN hErE
<syringe> what the fuck are you supposed to do? exploit sendmail
in a paper bag? -
2018-07-03 at 12:37 PM UTC in Hottest Girl ON NISRule #1 of the Internet:
Anybody who says they are a dude, is a dude.
Anybody who says they are a chick is a 50 year old truck driver from Phoenix. His name is Bruce. -
2018-06-25 at 7:52 AM UTC in Cheap house
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2018-06-25 at 7:40 AM UTC in What you watchin whoreThe Commuter
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2018-06-24 at 6:44 AM UTC in Making This Thread And Never Checking It
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2018-06-22 at 9:11 AM UTC in Why are dirty black cotton picking spook looking fat lipped stinky niggers so good at sports?this thread is the best
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2018-06-22 at 9:08 AM UTC in If Mexico wins World Cupomg a nigger just stole the pesos!
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2018-06-22 at 9:02 AM UTC in what did your last text message say?throw the jedi down the well
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2018-06-22 at 8:59 AM UTC in what information can be taken from an IP address?the numbers
lots and lots of numbers
the new v6 thingy has some letters in it too
oh fuck -
2018-06-22 at 8:58 AM UTC in The letter zedzed is dead baby
zed is dead -
2018-06-20 at 4:36 AM UTC in If I worked out, I'd just work my glory muscles.decline presses, standing dumbell chest flys, curls, hammer curls, gorilla row with kettlebells. done
if you want to work your legs, do squats. no squat rack, just grab two weights, hold them above your shoulders, and squat
abs come from low body fat. too much ab work makes your stomach bigger, not tighter. no crunches ever/ maybe some glute work. chicks dig glutes -
2018-06-20 at 4:34 AM UTC in ALL I WANT TO DO IS SLICK MY FUCKING HAIR BACK. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?you need to soften your hair first
check out some african hair care products
nigger
EDIT: added the word "nigger" -
2018-06-16 at 3:05 PM UTC in "Jeff Hunter" where are you?
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2018-06-16 at 6 AM UTC in I want to learn how to fix bicycles.2 pairs of channel locks, 2 small crescent wrenches, 2 small vise grips, a hex screw driver with a bit box, and a basic metric/standard socket set
for your socket set go stanley. middle of midrange, good price; you can get a double set of metric/standard sockets (3/8" and 1/4" drive) with two ratchets and some extensions for 30 bucks. add a hex-to-1/4" socket adapter for your hex screwdriver and a little frame mount tire pump and you have it all covered
for bonus points get an under-seat bag to keep the crescent wrenches and a spare tube. the handles of the crescent wrenches make good spoons for removing old tires and seating new tires without scraping the bead raw
if you need to adjust spokes TAKE IT TO A REPAIR SHOP. seriously. adjusting spokes sucks ass and if you fuck it up you'll have to buy a new rim for more than the shop would charge for the adjustment
it is always worthwhile to pay a little extra for a rim job -
2018-06-16 at 5:51 AM UTC in How to fuck a deerAny pointers?
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2018-06-13 at 4:54 AM UTC in What makes BLACK, RED, and BROWN menwatermelons
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2018-06-12 at 5:22 AM UTC in Quitting my job and going to live in a van down by the river
