There it is the speeding car feeling
Jus weird how much tech I've forgotten nd sites that were important to me. My bookmarks bar has been the same since 2016.
2023-04-15 at 11:47 PM UTC
in
Sophie: Where are you?
I'm acc being hypnotised to forget him but will remember him one day.
2023-04-15 at 11:46 PM UTC
in
Sophie: Where are you?
Other option is we make a website in his memory. Somewhere the spastics have no say.
2023-04-15 at 11:45 PM UTC
in
Sophie: Where are you?
If you all keep making this thread about everthing else I will make other Sophie threads. You're being real disrepectful some people here actually miss him.
It's just strange I have these principles that no one taught me, so they must be inherited, from my dad most likely. But they were always within, he was never my example.
Alls this reminds me of Proust's Within a Budding Grove. He says about children, how differenct aspects of their parents are inherited, maybe a girl inherits her dad's good looks but her mother's wicked soul. All I know is I am not of the same soul as my mother. The things she does apalls me and I don't get that sense from anywhere other than inside myself.
Okay I may not make a good mother bcus I am too easily stressed w the autism and am too serious to do that baby talk thing. But I remember being a child so I know exactly what can sting and to avoid that, I know exactly what they need.
I used to use all this fucking mouse in my hair so it was straw like curls. Dunno what I was thinking. Nd my eyebrows were like a 90s hooker w the eyelash extensions nd all. AND I was blonde
Alls this is reminding me of the lil American girl I loved and her graduation photos. She's prob the only girl I loved that I didn't end up hating, the only one who wasn't a Libra.
It was the autism tbh, in hs I didn't use hair conditioner for a year and never straightened my hair. I knew people at formals had to do their hair and makeup and stuff and I had no idea how bcus where was my mum? I still rarely straighten my hair. I've realised now it looks better straightened but I don't want heat to ruin it.
I don't remember any graduation. There was one where I just had to collect some diploma for playing violin in a concert. The other awards ceremony I didn't show up.
We didn't even have yearbook pictures. Ok we did but it was as a class. I didn't go to the formal even though a guy asked me. Know why? Bcus I didn't know how to make up and thought I couldn't look pretty. Sometimes I still think of that lime green ballgown even though green doesn't suit my skintone. But no biggy that guy turned out to be rapey and gave me PTSD a few years later. He didn't actually rape me but I was still traumatised.
