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The words you see or hear throughout the day do affect you psychologically, if someone says they’re tired that can make you behave as though you are too. I have a negative feeling when I see some thread titles so I don’t want to see that often. Also worried about normalising this place. People telling each other to kill themselves. I think reading rubbish can fatigue your brain, causing temporary symptoms of depression.
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This may not be related that was all a roller coaster to read. I think self-sabotage happens because if you don’t achieve something and blame it on your mental health or whatever then you can still tell yourself you could achieve it, instead of having to face trying your best and failing.
I thrived during lockdown, spent more time outdoors than before it and think it was because there was no pressure, life was simple because everything had already gone to hell.
I think a change of environment could help.
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I’ve been tracking my mood for months and this is the first day it’s been happy probably because of lack of sleep and cuddling with my nephew. I feel like I burnt my arm, it got too close to a fire and feels burnt. My nephew is my reason for living.
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I’m surprised I’ve survived this long. At one point I was getting hundreds of death threats and it didn’t phase me, I argued with them all and never apologised. I’d never off myself over one person but lately feel like I don’t have much fight left, why it took me so long to recover from the vaccine dose. I have ideas in my head of happiness, I’ll go places that make me happy but it’s like there’s this cloud of horror, imagine rain clouds but horror. Happy memories seem grey-tinted. I feel like there’s no way for me to grow as a person, I’ve reached my final form, and I don’t want to get old. I guess what’s given me immunity so far is wanting revenge, but now I’m just tired. I will get through the next few months and have adventures lined up but I doubt they’ll change anything, I’ve seen enough.
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Shot someone at the beach, running from police, down an alleyway someone grabbed me and said it was safe to black out, I didn’t want to, came to my Nana’s house.
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I’m actually glad that guy was there because I wasn’t affected and he will probably be haunted by my hooker outfit for awhile.
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She sent that bcus she doesn’t give a fuck about you, is guilt-tripping you and doesn’t want you to move on bcus she’s a skank
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2022-03-18 at 12:41 AM UTC
in
Heaven is a place on earth
Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood
u ever have sex with a woman female?
Why, you want tips? ;)
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The taxi place said they would be an hour so I got in a strangers car this old man yeah I was scared for a sec but am fine now
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Idk how I ended up here stamping people for entry
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Idk who I am in the mirror
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Fr can’t hear out of my left ear but I’ve only been paralytic twice in my life and got up
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I have been able to drink a whole bottle of vodka and still type but I’m really at my limit guys
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She’s just messing with you bcus she’s a sick bitch and knows she can. Trust me she knows how it affects you and gets off on it
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I shouldn’t have drank vodka before coming here she gave me two shots almost at limit. The painter is taking photos took one of me with his daughter some girl locked in the bath449’ I know my limits I’m at it
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Or you could just not give a fuck. Trash took itself out
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Block her, black out on drugs and then rebound
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Life stops for no one ya hear
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