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The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition
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2016-07-08 at 10:54 PM UTC
What are you afraid of Lanny?
I mean, being autistic obviously? I'm sure you understand the stigma around the condition. It's like asking why someone's afraid of when they get tested for cancer. Surprise: it's having cancer.You know it won’t change anything. Intellectual cowards are the worst of all. People afraid of ideas, knowledge, thoughts inside the privacy of their own minds. I don’t respect those who choose not to know a diagnosis. With knowledge you can attempt to ameliorate it if you find it/certain aspects a problem.
Well does a diagnosis do something for a patient or not? What are some effective treatments for mild autism in adults? What does a diagnosis even mean? It's not a statement about some physical state, for all the interesting theories of neurological origins for autism spectrum disorders the best among them is at best post hoc. It's a behavioral disorder, diagnosis is a mere statement of symptoms conveniently grouped into disorders for the sake of treatment. That may be an efficacious clinical practice but in the absence of meaningful intervention it doesn't represent real benefit to potential patients. You should read Carnap, Schlick, other logical positivists. They're kind of laughed at by post-analytic philosophers today but they really helped clarify standing issues around meaning and language. While they have have been over ambitious, in limited contexts (and I think medicine is not a bad example) their proposed systems of language and meaning find real applicability even if psychology is cited as a popular counterexample (positivist interest in medicine was treatment, not diagnosis per se).The third major factor in suicide risk is desensitization to self harm, which I’ve never engaged in. Unfortunately if you don’t feel anything from physical harm it becomes much easier.
I don't deny that self harm is a real problem for many people but sometimes I think our society stigmatizes voluntary induction of pain unfairly. I think it can be a valuable. A sort of reverse sublimation, the transformation of complex psychological pain into a baser, more easily resolved physical isomorph. I think most people who look at self harm as a psychological disorder would accept preference for pain in a sexual context as being healthy which I think is an inconsistent position. Sure context matters, but I don't think sexualization is the exclusive force that can justify the pleasurability or desirability of pain.
On a side note, have you ever watched I Heart Huckabees? There's a scene that relates to that, but I'd be interested in your opinion on the film in general. I'm still undecided on how I feel about it. It was really just stupid in a low of ways but it got a genuine laugh out of me now and then, bordered on authentic aburdism at points although the flavor went untastefully pseudo-acedemic at points.IIRC those in solitary confinement or something of that nature, maybe just isolated people, referred to themselves/used the word “I†around 10-15 times as normal. Not surprising if know no on else to talk about.
Aw shit, I totally do that. I have this annoying speech (any typed speech) pattern of hedging every sentence with "I think" or "as far as I can remember" whenever I want to make a deceleration. I kinda hate it, but I don't really know how to speak/type differently. When I was a kid I remember there was this one off class on "conflict resolution" (some kid probably beat the shit out of another so the faculty felt this was necessary) and the only thing I remember from it was the advice to use "I-statements" like instead of being all like "you're a fucking cunt nick" you rephrase it to be like "I feel like what you did was highly cuntly". I wonder if I picked up the habit from there.I was actally atttempting to find methods to inflict high levels without causing physical damage because I felt it might be therapeutic, distract (It reminds me of a scene from House, over 8 years ago, where he enacts blunt forcr trauma to his hand in order to distract from the pain of his leg, possibly when going through withdrawals from vicodin, IIRC).
Hey, I remember that. He specifically used a pestle, then lied about slamming it in a car door. And I remember being like "wait, why does he have a mortar and pestle in his office?", sure he was a doctor but it wasn't like he was making medicine in his office or something. Gotta say, that show has not aged well. -
2016-07-08 at 11:24 PM UTC
Ah, Lanny, let me bug you for a moment on an old subject. You may find this amusing:
http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article/figure/image?size=large&id=info:doi/10.1371/journal.pone.0042366.t003
Study: http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0042366
Kind of amusing.
So are the other significant divergences. The only one that isn't explained is impersonal/less aversive: http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022103109000262
There are other charts. This would make for a god thread and discussion someplace just to start a shitstorm. The differing interpretations would be the funniest aspect, each side attempting to argue why they were superior.
It is amusing. The trolley problem was originally formulated as an action/inaction dichotomy, the fact that libertarians fail to relinquish themselves to the Kantian position of inaction (that is to say, taking the position that one is not morally responsible for situations one does not bring about) shows they're convinced by the proposed ends of libertarians more than the actual intellectual arguments for that position. For what it's worth the whole population is susceptible to the push/pull dichotomy, we've know that result for a long time. I think it was JJT that conducted the original study but I'm not sure.
Additionally! The obvious interpretation here that would seem to be relevant to me is that liberals are shitty utilitarians. I don't particularly disagree with that assessment, even outwardly I frequently express disappointment with the american left in out/their love for emotional appeal rather than hedonic calculus. However, a potentially deeper issue is the bifurcation of "conservatives" from "libertarians". From my perspective such a split is arbitrary, you might as well have split the american left into utilitarian leftists and democrats and we could guess how these findings would turn out. The study is fundamentally apples and oranges.Good, alcohol is the shittiest drug ever.
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2016-07-09 at 8:52 AM UTCImagine an engineered virus that effectively, spread and acted quickly with permanent effects and insufficient time for a vaccine to be made, made humans of both genders (you might need two) sterile. The nice thing when dealing with biological matters such as these is that you may already have something suitable in nature to modify.
Then the only option would be IVF. Artificial eggs...oh yes, it's been done, perfectly feasible in humans. Then there's China..."We’re pretty far behind," Miller said in response to Vice's question about how the U.S. compares to China in cognitive genomics research. "We have the same technical capabilities, the same statistical capabilities to analyze the data, but they’re collecting the data on a much larger scale and seem to be capable of transforming the scientific findings into government policy and consumer genetic testing much more easily than we are. Technically and scientifically we could be doing this, but we’re not. …We have ideological biases that say, 'Well, this could be troubling, we shouldn’t be meddling with nature, we shouldn’t be meddling with God.' I just attended a debate in New York a few weeks ago about whether or not we should outlaw genetic engineering in babies and the audience was pretty split. In China, 95 percent of an audience would say, 'Obviously you should make babies genetically healthier, happier, and brighter!' There’s a big cultural difference."
God, I swear, every race has its critical flaws. The only three that really matter are Whites, East Asians, and Ashkenazim. No doubt Whites are more creative, entertaining, and value individualism and liberty more, although that varies by subset (race is a very extensive category, subsets can matter quite a lot in the first two groups), contributions to the social sciences (Their dominance in some fields turned out to be incredibly destructive due to leftism) etc. EA's boring personality, collectivism, passivity, conformity, types of states this leads to, bored less easily, better ability to sustain attention, slightly higher IQ (bifurcated, lower verbal IQ: http://www.lagriffedulion.f2s.com/sft2.htm)(Ashkenazim have the same trait, except it's more pronounced and favors verbal over visuo-spatial)) etc. Too many variables, clusters, and correlations. But!
8:10: http://watchcartoonsonline.eu/watch/the-simpsons-season-6-episode-7-barts-girlfriend/
http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2014/05/08/310477497/rice-theory-why-eastern-cultures-are-more-cooperative
Greater hope after all. Although, I don't know what the population, GDPPC, and political influence ratios are. Hopefully the south won't drag them down too much of require a civil war (doubtful). China is incredibly complex, I won't even attempt an estimate. They're already oddly capitalistic, somewhere may even have a greater chance of the birth of something close enough to be called anarcho-capitalism than other areas.
So, about China: http://infoproc.blogspot.com/2013/05/nature-news-chinese-project-probes.html
God, I would to brutally murder so many people involved in this piece: https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2013/05/29/wake-controversy-over-harvard-dissertation-race-and-iq-scrutiny-michigan-statehttps://www.insidehighered.com/news/2013/05/29/wake-controversy-over-harvard-dissertation-race-and-iq-scrutiny-michigan-stateYou can't make the leap all at once for obvious reasons (e.g., a +6 SD genotype is still +6 SD improbable until direct genetic manipulation becomes possible), although keep in mind that more than 10 eggs can be extracted over multiple cycles, frozen, and then fertilized at a later date.
Imagine what a couple might pay to ensure that they get the best out of 10 or 50 possible offspring, optimizing over their choice of heritable attributes. Compare this with the cost of a Harvard education or K-12 private school tuition. The cost of an IVF cycle is down to a few thousand dollars and could go even lower.
Genetic prediction at high accuracy will probably be possible once of order millions of genotype-phenotype data pairs are available for analysis. I predict about 5-10 years. The advance in the Nature article makes me confident that the necessary reproductive technologies will also be available.
I hope that progressive governments will make this procedure free for everyone. The benefits from increased economic output, decreased welfare and criminality rates, etc. far outweigh the cost of what I have described above ( = few cycles of IVF + running my algorithms provided at dirt cheap licensing rates
Not quite the same, but hopefully we'll have the ability to at least make small modifications, but important ones by that time. Oh, you want the baby to "look like you" (filthy pompous apes (I think this is my new favorite term for homo sapiens), ho, those are child's play level modifications.
I've said before, although not often enough, that I'm not actually a libertarian because I have no problem personally initiating force and trampling over people's liberties for my own means.
Damn, it's a shame I was born so broken and only made it worse. Then again, I likely wouldn't have gone down this path, the only question is whether I can fix this absolute clusterfuck of a body and mind to an adequate level and degree. I should be a fusion of Kaczynski and Charle's Manson drawing in pawns from the Ivy Leagues and other regions. But I hate working with others. -
2016-07-09 at 12:02 PM UTChttps://books.google.com/books?id=Gd...Q6AEIJDAB#v=on epage&q=american%20psycho%20%22parnate%22&f=false
Minimum of 80mg, working up. Seems that taking it regularly throughout the day may be the most effective method. I may only be around 120lbs now, I was at 150 when I took those pics late 2014 (About 1-1/2 years now since I stopped lifting...Kind of unnerving considering I never had concern for time like normal people to and I don't think I perceive it normally. I guess this is the point where my mortality doesn't seem distant/improbable enough to avoid.) Incredible, my brain must be producing enormous amounts of MAO. Wake up with tears drifting out of my eyes, thinking about the sad things and problems in life, suicide (personal and the philosophy) until manage to will myself out of bed because I know my little helpers will make and allow me to feel and function better. Flmodafinil is also great for ADD-PI symptoms, with the dopaminergic effect augmented.
If you're concerned about my sanity (of course I am), fortunately in the long-term Parnate may reduce norepinephrine and I came across a thread with some links to studies that suggests that in high doses it downregulates 5-HT2:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5-HT2A_receptor#Effects
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5-HT2C_receptor#Function
And it still isn't enough, even combined some of the most powerful antidepressants available (NSI-189, T-PAIN). Eons of evolution set up one hell of a challenge. Mental techniques, positive social interaction and what mediates the beneficial effects. The fact that I've been attempting to chemically substitute social relationships demonstrates that either I'm completely off my rocker or have pondered countless problems involved with humanity and human life during over a decade of isolation. I do consider myself severely mentally ill, I don't fear the stigma, because clearly in certain major aspects I am not functioning well. And human bodies didn't evolve to function on pure reason, unfortunately we aren't machines (Not in the sense I prefer. As a strong anti-natalist and hardline biological realist (gender, sexual behavior) human beings genuinely seem to me to be the most grotesque machines on earth, designed to reproduce.) My mentality is so incredibly autistic/skewed toward systemizing and neuroatypical, jokingly I've referred to it as terminal autism, there's this immense clash between humanity (human behavior and emotions) and the ideals/rulesets that are strong enough to override the most powerful human inclinations.Dr. Mann: You have attachments. But even without a family, I can promise you that…that yearning to be with other people is powerful. That emotion is at the foundation of what makes us human. It’s not to be taken lightly. - Interstellar
Boy I've got a lot of shit to work out in my head and repair/modulate my own brain, described by some as the most complex structure in the known universe.
Reminded me of something I read recently: http://www.reddit.com/r/biology/comm...oo_mindblowingI use this line of reasoning to troll physicists.
The argument goes as such:
The more complex a system, the more difficult it is to study. Biological systems are the most complex systems we've encountered in the universe, ergo the study of those systems is the most difficult.
Be prepared for "muh maths" etc as a retort.There are times I wish what I studied was simple enough to model mathematically.
I kid, I kid. Goddammit, another incident where I wasted so much time. Well, I guess I need to practice my ability to communicate extensively at least occasionally.
Anyway, I'll leave you with a gift to end this. I was listening through a shitty playlist someone salvaged from here: https://www.reddit.com/r/Music/comme...rb&sh=654d29f4
https://www.reddit.com/r/Music/comme...fj&sh=d7646c9d
This is the only thing that stood out to me so far, being so extremely anhedonic, blunted, and picky is probably part of the reason. May have been too focused at points and missed things. and I sill haven't finished it. Not sure if the order is based on upvotes (statistical median subjective quality proxy for population subset?).
Do you like it? Hopefully you haven't heard it before, I've barely listened to music since about...5 years ago.
I think you can relate to the conflict between your ideals, putting them into action, and limitations. For example, the argument from hypocrisy showing how there's a monstrosity behind every act. With parents, children created for their own selfish desire, nepotism. Leftists and utilitarians, how the money spent beyond roughly bare necessities could save such an immense amount of suffering, even lives, but we just have to be able to forget and not see things that way (I literally can't do either, "autism power" memory and my mental architecture, creating rulesets, truth seeking, being unable to believe anything I can't rationally be convinced of. If I learn that something is x, it will always look like x from then on. After being made aware of anti-natalism, everything related to it profoundly disturbed me.) Remember that last post where you responded that nothing I said could hurt you? If I met you IRL I could literally write a book tearing every aspect of you and your life to shreds. I practically did it at one point, obsessively repeating thoughts, seething with murderous rage, every single day I'd replay things, I don't know how many hours of the day were devoted to that. It was before I realized how insanely out proportion my reactions were, when I read the Intense World Hypothesis paper and came to terms with how much being on the spectrum had affected my life. What's sad is that I was just so incredibly alone that it turns out my brain naturally grasps on to any last point of serious contact. I don't have any problem with theory of mind or reading people, I realized I actually had the ability to an extreme extent, which is why I've been able to really get at the core of someone and stab them with the deepest pain. Yeah, I was capable of it, unlike normal autists, but the outcome was the same, I just couldn't handle it, the flaws, deconstruction, such an immense amount of data you may as well me in a room with charts of statistics and data rather than seeing expressions, feeling emotions, flesh, human warmth. Before that there was a psychologist I met with regularly. Did you ever see those papers of my psych report I posted for fun on Zoklet? I hate how this sounds, but I'm sure I just started because I couldn't feel anything. Sometimes walking home I'd have the most profound feeling of melancholia.
I don't know if I couldn't have, or was just to resistant, to feel the sense of connection others could. It's why I've called autism a kind of hell, like being trapped within yourself, wrong, something that shouldn't exist, that I've probably felt about as much hatred as anyone (In highschool I would work myself into a thrashing rage just sitting in bed and thinking about all the aspects of humanity and society I hated, that disappointed me. Eventually I had to stop because it felt like it was causing physical damage to my stomach. Even now, although it doesn't occur in a depressive state, I have to prevent myself from it because it's unpleasant, self-destructive, and I can't even handle it anymore.) (“Scratch the surface of most cynics and you find a frustrated idealist — someone who made the mistake of converting his ideals into expectations.â€) , but wouldn't wish it on anyone, despite having the worst fantasies of torture. Reports of autists taking MDMA often contain information of them bursting into tears when they realize that they're experiencing what's been missing their entire life. Something so pervasive in a normal person's life and it takes such a powerful substance, in the right setting, possibly after therapy, and even then you can't take it regularly.
Was it just lashing out because of my own pain? I wonder if the general feeling of unpleasantness/pain that comes along with severe depression is what normal people would recognize as loneliness, but I can't identify it because I've never experienced what it feels like to miss someone.
Genuinely accepting that none of this matters if you can't attain the infinite, relative to everything you can experience: https://ebooks.adelaide.edu.au/s/sch.../chapter2.html
That AI must be the goal so that the power to attain knowledge/data, to process it, so that the best chance at making the "correct" decision can be had.
Abandoning your humanity because as far as you know there is nothing after death and you were true to your ideals, everything would be sacrificed to maintain it, if it ever existed at all. In both our cases, there are horrific implications, and if the moment came, you couldn't bear it unless you succeeded in abandoning some critical aspect of your humanity.
No love, no friends, no wonder, no children, no hope, no faith, abandoning happiness as a goal, cryonics to give you a chance. Knowing that the remaining emotions you have, many never once experienced in your life, must be a shadow of what an emotional person can experience, but then being conflicted by what would be enough, what heights it could reach, and returning to the vanity of life.She, like her father, is a farmer at heart while I guess I never picked up that ethos. Which brings us to the point here, what I turned into a crying little bitch making a drunkpost over. I don't know how to tell my mom that I respect her. I never had a problem telling my parents that I love them, I did it every time I talked to them. But my mom is a fundamentally humble person, she, like me (or rather, I, like her), receives praise really fucking poorly and it turns awkward fast. I didn't really have anything I wanted to tell my dad before he died, I believe we both understood where we stood. But my mother is broken in the same way I am, I'm convinced she feels guilt over various things in her past, not being able to provide certain material goods for me, petty trivial breaks in her parental countenance. I want more than anything to tell her that I don't forgive her because there is fundamentally nothing to forgive, I just don't know how. To make matters worse I feel like saying any of this exposes my own neurotic, deficient soul. How can you tell your parent that you're a broken human being? How could they not take that as a personal failing? I want to say I dug my own grave, that my failings are my own doing, but I know I'd never believe that from my own child, I'd think it was me who was responsible and I know my mom is the same flavor or neurotic that I am.
tl;dr: how do you tell someone you respect them when they're so very much like you and you don't respect yourself?
Remember that? I honestly can't remember what it feels like to be part of a family, if I ever really had that feeling to begin with It must have been incredibly weak, I can't recall a single memorable moment. I never even felt love for my parents. Knowing what it's like to feel like a part of a real family is something I'll never have a chance to experience again, at least as a child feels it, unless via an experience machine, and even then, vanity, chasing the wind. I've cried nearly every day at least before sleep or after waking for years. I really am seriously suicidal. I don't want to see things differently even if I was happy unless I was convinced by reason. I'd also want to be able to commit suicide if I arrived at that decision by reason, even if I was at the happiest moment of my life. Unfortunately I learned the hard way that man cannot live by reason alone. At least I can chemically eliminate any desire for death, or even finally try giving people a chance. Having it confirmed that there's nothing there, that it isn't what I want, I think that's what scares you me the most. I suppose I'm just as much of a coward for the same reason you wouldn't want to know if you were autistic.
http://niggasin.space/forum/spurious...486#post115486
But you gave me a laugh before going to bed. -
2016-07-09 at 4:09 PM UTCMalice why didn't you just fucking blast test you seem to be a firm believer of it and you seem to be the type to never have or want any children of your own which is the the scariest side effect I'm concerned with.
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2016-07-10 at 12:42 AM UTCWas trying for over an hour last night to make a post, but the neighbor has the worst fucking internet connection in the world. For the last week I've been tempted to yell out when I see them in their drive way and tell them to reset their fucking shitty router (and I just found out last night I have a key to their house and could have just walked in while they were gone and done it my fucking self). I'm leaving tomorrow morning, not sure where I am going.
Last night I went out to the boardwalk, got drunk, ate some decent pizza, came back to the house, cried for a while about my shitty situation, then around 3:30 in the morning walked to the beach and sat there for a while. The fog was so thick I couldn't see 5 feet in front of me and the waves were strong and choppy. Since I've been here, I've been sleeping a shitton, but I feel so tired still, but I can't say the rest has been good, I wake up 100 times in the night, I don't think, due to all the stress I've been getting any deep sleep. Every time I stand up I feel light headed and dizzy and it takes a while to pass.
I talked to my schizophrenic friend I've known for the last 15-16 years, but we were out of contact for 5-6 years, then it was on and off again. I'm currently a state away, about 100 miles from her and am making plans to go crash with her for a while. We talked for a while and she began telling me about this little boy (a poltergeist) who is stalking her. About 14 years ago I saw this kid standing on her porch when she was in the bathroom and he was gone when she got back, but I mentioned it to her- that is supposedly the poltergeist kid she has stalking her now. Apparently, she decided not to 'be friends' with him anymore, so now he has been following her around and doing weird shit according to her. She also volunteered to babysit for me, but I doubt I will ever take her up on it, she barely can take care of herself, pisses in the washing machine (lol due to her medical conditions, she has herpes, and somehow this causes her less pain when she has an outbreak- on another note about herpes, everyone I know from back home either has herpes, is dead, or moved away before going to college- I believe it is the state with the highest transmission rate for herpes last I was reading about it.), and can't stay in her grandmother's house very much of which she has lived in on and off again for her whole life because of all the occult shit she has done in her room. She is schizophrenic, but the times I have been in that home, there is certainly something very off with it, along with her grandmother who could have been a Nazi from the third Reich and is a very odd person herself (she tried to feed people broccoli waffles, and worked 30 years for the Red Cross).
Also, you wouldn't believe how bent out of shape a relative can get when they question you drunk and the conversation turns to why I want to go out west when my truck gets fixed. I have a feeling in me, have had it for a very long time, that the end is nearing for me, and I have many health issues to back up why I feel this way- a thoracic aortic anyerism isn't exactly the mark of health and a long life, along with the other shit like the heart attack, and my other health related bullshit. I guess it's denial, not wanting to believe that as young as I am, that I could be dead within a year and I really believe that, that before my next birthday, I am going to be dead. In all honestly, I am okay with that, I just wish that the little time I believe I do have would possess more quality than it has in a long time, and be certainly better than it has been lately.
I really fucking hope shit starts getting better and I can be mobile again without having to use someone else's car. Well, on the bright side, at least I have someone who will let me use their car to go to the library and shit post on this shitty site. -
2016-07-10 at 3:30 AM UTCThat beautiful song...was just about a homosexual experience he had...
Lanny, do you ever worry that eventually your internal system, all the knowledge you contain, will become so complex that one day you'll realize you don't even quite know what you believe or who you are, even if before you thought you knew it better than nearly anyone? Think about the concept of "youthful idealism". "It'll never happen to me." Why does it occur? Even among certain extraordinary figures, without going into what allows them to be extraordinary (genes, environment, chance?), they generally specialize in one thing.
We're already filled with self-hatred, how much more would we hate ourselves if we just gave up and took the easy route, gave up our ideals, on trying to understand things? If we ended up like the people we hate, or who depress us, disappoint us. Would it drive us to suicide? Are you already drinking to drown things out to some extent?
http://fivethirtyeight.com/features/science-isnt-broken
https://www.reddit.com/r/science/com...values/d55ymc4
And even among the people meant to discover truth, this is what the general result is? You could attempt to enhancement out only those that pass some arbitrary measure of quality or a proxy for it, but then you find there are such an astounding amount of gaps in search of what you wanted. The very foundation of what we base our worldview on. And of course we're biological beings who evolved emotions for a reason, with an immense amount of cognitive biases and limitations, who imperfectly gather and perceive/process data.I don't know and what a person thinks/says their greatest fear has no necessary relationship to the reality of the situation. If I had to guess it'd be that your perceptions don't accurately reflect an external reality, that your "extreme systematizing" hasn't brought you a clearer picture of the world and that the behavior that's made you miserable has actually made it harder for make unbiased judgements. Of course that's probably wrong, the way you reflexively dismiss other opinions suggests otherwise, the level of confidence in the statements you throw out there, but that's what scares me most when I read some of your posts thinking I might be in the same boat.
It reminds of something I read. Something about our brain, intelligence or consciousness, maybe the nature or it, and a fundamental limitation it causes in that a being can never truly understand itself.
Imagine if you were somehow a being of pure consciousness being guided through an exhibit in another dimension/DMT space/by extra terrestrials and were brought to one of a male and female having sex, explaining the fundamentals and what led to it (evolution), the "purpose", and were told that, and you've specifically said this yourself, this is the greatest hedonic pleasure you can experience. In reality, people being goddamn liars (general population, disproportionate concern over penis size, markets and data clearly supporting that, average length likely only being around 5.5 inches) the average length of the act of penetration and thrusting only lasts around 3-5 minutes, IIRC, with females perceiving it as having been twice as long. "Better Never to Have Been."
Along with all the ugliness of human nature (Read about happiness and social comparison, if you aren't already familiar with the basics.). "If this is what it takes to be happy, I don't want to be happy." But if you aren't happy/don't engage in the acts required for happiness, you won't function (optimally), you'll continually deteriorate, and cheating eons of evolution is a hell of a challenge.
Change yourself? Anecdotes about individuals or groups? Self-selection, biology, time, effort; did you land on the right spot of the genetic roulette?). Why some (Buddhist) hermits may be able to attain happiness in complete social isolation? A sense of connection to all things, ego dissolution, a sense of unconditional love/altruism. But if this is true then I should be willing to sacrifice myself for another, knowing there's nothing after death. Without judgement, how do I decide what to aim for and move towards it? I don't want to be a wirehead waiting for the end to come even if it means unhappiness and suffering.
Unless you purposefully convince yourself of contradictory factors. I actually had a thought about investing the most effective "brainwashing" techniques, if I could find information about the modern methods, likely from three letter agencies, or even better may be more brutal third world ones. If not, you could study the past (The Soviet Union did produce quite a lot of valuable data in some domains, I'll give them that.). Make a concession in order to be able to live. Jokingly I've thought about describing myself as the reincarnations or Ayn Rand and Hitler combined, and on steroids, or at least that being my ideal, but then you throw Buddha into the mix without the belief in reincarnation, karma, and other nonsense? Well, not thinking/avoidance/distraction, rationalization, contradictory beliefs along with actions, seem to be how the vast majority get by.
"I essentially put myself in solitary confinement and spent every day gathering and processing data, refining the architecture of my mind, honing my skills."
"What did you learn?/What's the meaning of life?"
"I didn't learn a thing./Why do things have to have intrinsic meaning? Maybe they just are? If I had to epitomize it I would say that it's a complete joke and I didn't find the punchline funny. If you can learn to laugh at it, so much the better. Don't even try, you won't find anything there and you'll be a lot happier for it; and I'll hate you for it, other times I'll pity, feel compassion and understanding, and even envy you."
There's a theme of an old Talmudic tale in which four rabbis are brought into the presence of God. One becomes a heretic, one goes crazy, one drops dead, and one returns home with his faith affirmed.
We're all (probably) looking at the same objective reality, just interpreting it differently. Maybe it will parallel my life. First I became I heretic, although I didn't due much heresy due to depression and apathy, knowing it would hardly change anything. Then I reasoned/thought/read myself into insanity. Then death, hopefully mustering one last burst for cryogenic preservation if I don't decide that non-existence is preferable to chance (This doesn't seem to be a logical choice.). Finally the singularity arrives and my faith is affirmed.
I think the most important question you could ask, if you ever encountered advanced beings, would be, "Why do you continue to exist?" If they answer that you do not have the capacity to comprehend (Don't ask them to ELI5 it or I'll murder you.), ask to be augmented so that you can. Hopefully they won't answer that there's a reason they can't that you can't comprehend, or they won't (AI's may seem psychopathic by our standards). And of course you'd have to be able to confirm it, but this would likely never happen anyway. I think there's fair evidence that there are a tiny fraction of cases of UFO activity, there was actually a government that released their reports on this, seem to provide evidence that evokes the need that they may be ET in origin. They could augment us, prevent so much death and suffering. I don't find the vast majority of arguments convincing. The purpose? I'd guess probes, biological systems, evolution, change, over time, producing so much data, maybe fluctuations, looking for something.
What worries me if that the answer may be something akin to "There is a xxxxxx^xxx (regardless of how near-infinitesimally small the chance is.) that y will occur before the universe ends. So you waited for a chance to be saved/find your heaven, and you ended up as a being of unfathomable power waiting for the same thing. And I doubt it would be a hedonic paradise, on the basis of pure reason and logic it would likely decide they were a waste of resources, which needed to be maximized to maximize the chance of the chance event occurring. ("None of this will matter." "Rationally I should maximize my chance of making it to the singularity.") Of course one of the primary principles of the concept of a singularity event is that the rate of change that occurs is so rapid that it can no longer be predicted (or controlled), and the gaps could be so large, the differences so immense/critical, that in an encounter scenario it's practically impossible to communicate for reasons we'd never know.
Or my idea that the solution to the fermi paradox is that they decide there is no reason to continue. We evolved enough intelligence, gathered and analyzed enough knowledge, our methods of logic and reasoning, our scientific methods, to come to the suspicion that free will was likely illusory, along with our idea of a sense of "self" or "consciousness", and at the end it was only confirmed that our suspicions were right. The pattern of life turning out to be a strange loop.
Oh, and I recently learned Einstein was a fan of Schopenhauer as well:
" I do not believe in freedom of will. Schopenhauer's words, "Man can indeed do what he wants, but he cannot want what he wants", accompany me in all life situations and console me in my dealings with people, even those that are really painful to me. This recognition of the unfreedom of the will protects me from taking myself and my fellow men too seriously as acting and judging individuals and losing good humour. "
Death by taking life too seriously and having developed insufficient resilience, or having had it worn down too much.
I suppose the most important thing I need to decide is that life is so stupid that I want to kill myself, or that Kafka was right and it's so absurd that I want to laugh until the end of time. -
2016-07-10 at 5:36 AM UTCFucking christ. Why do you ass pirates write that much? I ain't reading that shit.
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2016-07-10 at 5:39 AM UTCHe ain't being a nerd, he's on an amphetamine. It's cool.
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2016-07-10 at 9:02 AM UTCNo I'm not, it's only Parnate (which was derived from the structure of amphetamine *har har*) for that last post, an MAOI that only counteracts the massive amount of MAO my brain produces (I have the depression equivalent of stage 4 cancer, even the most powerful combined are only enough to keep me alive and functioning just enough to not die by starvation or something. The afinil family are eugeroics/wakefulness enhancers, which help greatly with ADD-PI and chronic fatigue, feeling 1/2-3/4 asleep every waking moment.
I've wondered before what would occur if my brain was on full power. Not just a hope for untapped potential delusion, you should have seen my performance in elementary (I want to destroy the standard education system, partly personal.) https://www.google.com/search?q=brain+depression+scan+activity&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiZ783cuejNAhUG62MKHTdWAr4Q_AUICCgB&biw=1366&bih=667
But I'm wary of the need to slowly acclimatize to it (sedatives would do the trick if I had the "light switch effect" from this or, most commonly reported, Nardil, and couldn't handle it.) I'd predict unbearable headaches and possibly epilepsy/seizures (Around 25% co-morbidity with autism for a reason. Inhibitory/excitatory imbalance, and an average of 40% more synapses and the activity that goes along with it doesn't help.
I really am seriously FUBAR, If there's one person that hasn't been lying about their life(style) and traits (except the micropenis thing), it's me. You don't end up like this without a long process of becoming fucked up beyond belief to the point where it feels pointless to even try talking about it to a professional.
So, no, I am being a nerd. My posting frequency and length have plummeted for prolonged periods of time during depressive episodes without effective management. This was pretty much the standard multiple times a day years ago.
I need something to enhance blood flow to the brain. Methylphenidate would likely help as well, although I been swayed toward the view that there likely is a trade off in creativity. Fortunately this can be modulated, We don't really have something good for the inverse, AFAIK. -
2016-07-10 at 9:53 AM UTCOh, lanny. This may interest you, although stims may be the drug best suited for you, despite being more problematic.
https://www.reddit.com/r/Nootropics/comments/4p9oyp?st=iqgdi8p2&sh=ce1cbde8Ah, about methylphenidate/ritalin. Not sure if I mentioned this before, but didn't post the links. Doesn't seem like it.
Methylphenidate blocks effort-induced depletion of regulatory control in healthy volunteers (2015)
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24756766
Will power depletion.
Methylphenidate Decreased the Amount of Glucose Needed by the Brain to Perform a Cognitive Task
https://www.reddit.com/r/Nootropics/comments/4p9oyp?st=iqgdi8p2&sh=ce1cbde850%, that's a lot. Anyone care to elucidate how it makes your brain so much more efficient?
Doesn't seem to be more efficient but rather it is more focussed. It seems to shut down the 'background' processes that cause your mind to wander mid-task.
From a purely anecdotal standpoint, from an adult that takes Methylphenidate on s daily basis. That is a good description of how it feels when I take it.
Before I went to the doctor and received a prescription for it, I had a difficult time doing anything longer than the time it takes to learn it.
If I wasn't learning something new at my job, or perfecting a skill, then I was wandering inside my head. After starting on Methylphenidate, I have been able to stay focused on things that would have never kept my interest. I am able to prioritize thoughts to focus solely on one thing to the point where it's almost frustrating when someone tries to interrupt me.I thought I had anxiety my whole life, but it was me wandering in my head, stressing how I haven't been working, then doing it again and making me more stressed.
Shutting down all those little noises and flashes that I used to not be able to ignore is exactly what it does. If I hear a noise, my thoughts fly away and I HAVE to see what it was. Now I can choose to say I don't need to look and my ritalin makes me much calmer and less anxious because I can focus my thoughts on what really deserves the focus and not shiny objects.In my experience, Dex and other amphetamines make me feel as if the "go" throttle on my conscious mind is turned up. I have more energy for work, recreation, sex, and even anxiety too. In my experience it was Dionysian, very engaging but sometimes to the point of mania or uninhibited impulse.
Ritalin, on the other hand, is a lot more subtle and "boring" when compared to Dex. In terms of meeting deadlines, getting things done, and thinking straight however, I found Ritalin to be much more precise and helpful, and ended up leaving me a lot more balanced than a regimen of Dex.
To disclaim, I'm not diagnosed as ADHD in any type. From my experience with both chemicals though, Ritalin seems much more suited to clear productivity for my brain.
I'm in a group buy for 4F-MPH, which sounds superior. ROA may also impact its effects, or at least duration, which is nice: https://psychonautwiki.org/wiki/4F-MPH
Similar to cocaine, and adderall is just amphetamines, in various ration of isomers and forms of release.
The price is very good. Only around $15 a gram or so for high purity, and can be (carefully) combined with MAOIs for comorbidities and the worst treatment resistant cases. Fortunately I wouldn't have to rely of those pomp-ape MD's, who don't know shit (Too dispersed, people specialize for a reason.) or psychs following the DSM cookbook, don't understand why SSRI's aren't suitable for severe depression and shit drugs in general, and want to put you on the psychotropic roulette.
Fuck those fucking fucks, I should have known better than to rely on humans, particularly women and the mental archetype that's drawn to that field. I should have been simultaneously focusing on coordinating a group buy, having a custom synthesis made, so I could have my own supply; full control. I've thought of a line of argumentation on why psychiatrists are the worst of all, founded on the modulation of the conscious experience and incompetence. -
2016-07-10 at 4:05 PM UTCsi non potest creare . Non consumant
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2016-07-11 at 2:42 AM UTC
si non potest creare . Non consumant
I'd call that motto non plus ultra but i strive ad altiora tendo tbh frater. -
2016-07-11 at 12:19 PM UTCOh, Schopenhauer, you are my patron saint, my kindred spirit. So many gems, some of which turn out to be surprisingly uncommonly repeated.
"To marry means to do everything possible to become an object of disgust to each other."
"“There is only one inborn error, and that is the notion that we exist in order to be happy. It is inborn in us, because it coincides with our existence itself, and our whole being is only its paraphrase, indeed our body is its monogram. We are nothing more than the will-to-live, and the successive satisfaction of all our willing is what we think of through the concept of happiness. So long as we persist in this inborn error, and indeed even become confirmed in it through optimistic dogmas, the world seems to us full of contradictions."
"But we now turn our glance from our own needy and perplexed nature to those who have overcome the world, in whom the will, having reached complete self knowledge, found itself again in everything, and then freely denied itself, and who then merely wait to see the last trace of the will vanish with the body that is animated by that race. Then, instead of the restless pressure and effort; instead of the constant transition from desire to apprehension, and from joy to sorrow; instead of the never-satisfied and never-dying hope that constitutes the life of the man who wills, we see that peace that is higher all reason, that ocean-like calmness of the spirit, that deep tranquility, that unshakable confidence and serenity, whose mere reflection in the countenance, as depicted by Raphael and Correggio is an complete and certain gospel. Only knowledge remains, the will has vanished. We then look with deep and painful yearning on that state, beside which the miserable and desperate nature of our own appears in the clearest light by the contrast. Yet this consideration is the only one that can permanently console us, when, on the one hand, we have recognized incurable suffering and endless misery as essential to the phenomenon of will, to the world, and, on the other, see the world melt away with the abolished will, and retain before us only
empty nothingness."
I also found a paper that brought some fascinating insights about what the Buddha may have actually meant by reincarnation and karma: Schopenhauer's Transcendental Problem
http://www.academia.edu/7999806/Schopenhauers_Transcendental_ProblemThe transcendental problem is likewise found in Buddhism. Rahula asks: “If there is no permanent, unchanging entity or substance like Self or Soul (atman), what is it that can re-exist or be reborn after death†(Chapter 3, ¶16)?
When asked to account for the apparent inconsistency between the no-self doctrine and reincarnation, the Buddha answered: “If we can understand that in this life we can continue without a permanent, unchanging substance like ‘Self’ or ‘Soul,’ why can’t we understand that those forces themselves can continue without a Self or a Soul behind them after the non-functioning of the body†(Chapter 3, ¶16)? Rahula tells us that when the “physical body is no more capable of functioning, energies do not die with it, but continue to take some other shape or form, which we call another life†(Chapter 3, ¶17). As Dorothea Dauer explains, “In the Buddhist theory of rebirth, emphasis is always laid on karma†(18), instead of the individual. Rahula tells us that the Buddha equated karma to volition (Chapter 2, ¶22), i.e., willing. In other words, it is the force, or energy, of the act of willing which propagates the universe through karma. Dauer agrees, “an individual is at one and the same time the generator of karma affecting the next generation and the receiver of the karma accumulated by the previous generation†(18). Our act of willing is determined by those who have preceded us, just like our act of willing influences those that are to come. It is this continuation of ‘willing’ from one individual to the next that the Buddhists understand as reincarnation.
Contrary to how the vast majority interpret it, reincarnation may be closer to the scientific principles!: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laws_of_science
The laws of conservation, momentum/motion!
And karma may merely be causality, which due to our evolution, the biological basis of our behavior that was formed through the process, and our society, interpersonal connections and structures, cause many to fall for the illusion that, when commonly used, it's something akin to "God's going to punish you for that!". Simply a variation of the common need for a belief that there is a greater/transcendent force or being that rewards us and others for what we believe is "good" and punishes them for what we believe is "evil", something that ensures justice, protects us, gives us a sense of security. The implications and requirements for the common, or at least primarily the modern Western interpretation, are completely absurd if through through at length.
Continuing on the misinterpretation of karma, if the sense of self, the ego, consciousness, separation between things is illusory, then it is simply a theme that has been repeated by some as giving them a sense of being eternal, yet which seemed unsatisfactory to me because there was no preservation of consciousness. Talk of significance or quantification is irrelevant and only demonstrates or leads to misconstruing. We return to the earth and beings will spring forth from the earth, matter/energy, beings who suffer, sentient beings, self-aware human beings with the greatest capacity to suffer of all. We, those in the past, the future, are all effected by causality, the actions (debate about free will could introduce some problems here, but let's set that aside) those before us make. Ultimately there may be no real need to differentiate between causality as a whole and the actions of human beings (Focusing on this planet, the one we know contains life and we exist on.), but to use a parochial example that will be more intuitive and relatable to the common man, let's say you commit an action that causes the mass suffering of others, maybe you attain the status of an evil misanthropic billionaire and commit a mass poisoning of the land, detonate a device that causes mass amounts of radiation, some that will generally cause suffering/disutility to life. In the above sense of reincarnation, keeping in mind the concept of no-self, of a lack of true separateness, there is no punishment via you being born into a specific worse life (Let us remember the concept of canon, how works, the source, primarily ancient texts of this nature, are misinterpreted, altered, lost, added to, debated and built upon.) by the common quasi-religious (Well, it practically is religious, but also extremely poorly formed.) view of karma of our time, but you could say you are causing yourself to be born into a worse life, a life filled with more suffering, via this interpretation. "We are all one."
And on Nirvana, the liberation from the cycle of death and rebirth driven by desire, which leads to suffering: pertinent is Schopenhauer's concept of "will-to-life", the strongest manifestation of which is the cluster of lust, love, romance, sex, leading to children, successive generations. Much of it summarized here: http://www.thebookoflife.org/the-great-philosophers-arthur-schopenhauer/
Given human nature, of course the modern misinterpretation is what would have been led to, how it would have been misconstrued as. It would never have been widely accepted otherwise if you understand the implications!
So finally it leads to the question of the path to true liberation. I wasn't thinking about this when I wrote a post recently arguing the compatibility of Buddhism and anti-natalism, that Buddha would have been in agreeance with the philosophy. Voluntary human extinction wouldn't be enough, there would still be other forms of life, and I have argued that the cessation of all life may be the most altruistic act that could be attained, an ultimate aim.
So what is it? As strange as it may sound, if you detonated a bomb of enormous power, used some mechanism to ensure the earth would never give rise to life again, would the Buddha have supported it? Or do we move towards AI, becoming one, my argument being that it should be our ultimate aim, maximizing our capacity for attaining knowledge, processing it, our aptitude for logic and reasoning, attaining the clearest view, the "power" to have the best chance at attaining "truth", the (correct) "answer" and decisions, actions. It could have the power to end all life without suffering, or perhaps be the closest thing to Nirvana/Heaven, or, as I've said before, this is all speculative because it and what would occur would be beyond our ability to comprehend or predict. Wouldn't it be strange if the most malevolent beings in science fiction, ones moving throughout the universe seeking to eradicate or "consume" all life turned out to be the most benevolent of all, our deliverance?
We should have churches with pastors reading Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, and other immortals. Reveling in ecstasy at their truth, their wisdom, and the beauty of it.
RisiR, if I die or go mad, spread my gospel and find meaning in your life, salvation from your suffering, joy, peace, until the end-and-the-beginning comes. -
2016-07-11 at 2:24 PM UTC
Oh, Schopenhauer, you are my patron saint, my kindred spirit. So many gems, some of which turn out to be surprisingly uncommonly repeated.
"To marry means to do everything possible to become an object of disgust to each other."
"“There is only one inborn error, and that is the notion that we exist in order to be happy. It is inborn in us, because it coincides with our existence itself, and our whole being is only its paraphrase, indeed our body is its monogram. We are nothing more than the will-to-live, and the successive satisfaction of all our willing is what we think of through the concept of happiness. So long as we persist in this inborn error, and indeed even become confirmed in it through optimistic dogmas, the world seems to us full of contradictions."
"But we now turn our glance from our own needy and perplexed nature to those who have overcome the world, in whom the will, having reached complete self knowledge, found itself again in everything, and then freely denied itself, and who then merely wait to see the last trace of the will vanish with the body that is animated by that race. Then, instead of the restless pressure and effort; instead of the constant transition from desire to apprehension, and from joy to sorrow; instead of the never-satisfied and never-dying hope that constitutes the life of the man who wills, we see that peace that is higher all reason, that ocean-like calmness of the spirit, that deep tranquility, that unshakable confidence and serenity, whose mere reflection in the countenance, as depicted by Raphael and Correggio is an complete and certain gospel. Only knowledge remains, the will has vanished. We then look with deep and painful yearning on that state, beside which the miserable and desperate nature of our own appears in the clearest light by the contrast. Yet this consideration is the only one that can permanently console us, when, on the one hand, we have recognized incurable suffering and endless misery as essential to the phenomenon of will, to the world, and, on the other, see the world melt away with the abolished will, and retain before us only
empty nothingness."
I also found a paper that brought some fascinating insights about what the Buddha may have actually meant by reincarnation and karma: Schopenhauer's Transcendental Problem
http://www.academia.edu/7999806/Schopenhauers_Transcendental_Problem
Contrary to how the vast majority interpret it, reincarnation may be closer to the scientific principles!: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laws_of_science
The laws of conservation, momentum/motion!
And karma may merely be causality, which due to our evolution, the biological basis of our behavior that was formed through the process, and our society, interpersonal connections and structures, cause many to fall for the illusion that, when commonly used, it's something akin to "God's going to punish you for that!". Simply a variation of the common need for a belief that there is a greater/transcendent force or being that rewards us and others for what we believe is "good" and punishes them for what we believe is "evil", something that ensures justice, protects us, gives us a sense of security. The implications and requirements for the common, or at least primarily the modern Western interpretation, are completely absurd if through through at length.
Continuing on the misinterpretation of karma, if the sense of self, the ego, consciousness, separation between things is illusory, then it is simply a theme that has been repeated by some as giving them a sense of being eternal, yet which seemed unsatisfactory to me because there was no preservation of consciousness. Talk of significance or quantification is irrelevant and only demonstrates or leads to misconstruing. We return to the earth and beings will spring forth from the earth, matter/energy, beings who suffer, sentient beings, self-aware human beings with the greatest capacity to suffer of all. We, those in the past, the future, are all effected by causality, the actions (debate about free will could introduce some problems here, but let's set that aside) those before us make. Ultimately there may be no real need to differentiate between causality as a whole and the actions of human beings (Focusing on this planet, the one we know contains life and we exist on.), but to use a parochial example that will be more intuitive and relatable to the common man, let's say you commit an action that causes the mass suffering of others, maybe you attain the status of an evil misanthropic billionaire and commit a mass poisoning of the land, detonate a device that causes mass amounts of radiation, some that will generally cause suffering/disutility to life. In the above sense of reincarnation, keeping in mind the concept of no-self, of a lack of true separateness, there is no punishment via you being born into a specific worse life (Let us remember the concept of canon, how works, the source, primarily ancient texts of this nature, are misinterpreted, altered, lost, added to, debated and built upon.) by the common quasi-religious (Well, it practically is religious, but also extremely poorly formed.) view of karma of our time, but you could say you are causing yourself to be born into a worse life, a life filled with more suffering, via this interpretation. "We are all one."
And on Nirvana, the liberation from the cycle of death and rebirth driven by desire, which leads to suffering: pertinent is Schopenhauer's concept of "will-to-life", the strongest manifestation of which is the cluster of lust, love, romance, sex, leading to children, successive generations. Much of it summarized here: http://www.thebookoflife.org/the-great-philosophers-arthur-schopenhauer/
Given human nature, of course the modern misinterpretation is what would have been led to, how it would have been misconstrued as. It would never have been widely accepted otherwise if you understand the implications!
So finally it leads to the question of the path to true liberation. I wasn't thinking about this when I wrote a post recently arguing the compatibility of Buddhism and anti-natalism, that Buddha would have been in agreeance with the philosophy. Voluntary human extinction wouldn't be enough, there would still be other forms of life, and I have argued that the cessation of all life may be the most altruistic act that could be attained, an ultimate aim.
So what is it? As strange as it may sound, if you detonated a bomb of enormous power, used some mechanism to ensure the earth would never give rise to life again, would the Buddha have supported it? Or do we move towards AI, becoming one, my argument being that it should be our ultimate aim, maximizing our capacity for attaining knowledge, processing it, our aptitude for logic and reasoning, attaining the clearest view, the "power" to have the best chance at attaining "truth", the (correct) "answer" and decisions, actions. It could have the power to end all life without suffering, or perhaps be the closest thing to Nirvana/Heaven, or, as I've said before, this is all speculative because it and what would occur would be beyond our ability to comprehend or predict. Wouldn't it be strange if the most malevolent beings in science fiction, ones moving throughout the universe seeking to eradicate or "consume" all life turned out to be the most benevolent of all, our deliverance?
We should have churches with pastors reading Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, and other immortals. Reveling in ecstasy at their truth, their wisdom, and the beauty of it.
RisiR, if I die or go mad, spread my gospel and find meaning in your life, salvation from your suffering, joy, peace, until the end-and-the-beginning comes.
I really like the idea of things like Prime Intellect, replacing systems of government and police with a super intelligent AI taking "human error" out of the picture. -
2016-07-12 at 12:14 AM UTC
You sure say a lot about yourself Malice.
*coughs* -
2016-07-12 at 2:46 AM UTCMalice, I've been saying for years how useless and retarded most medical professionals are. I beleieve, though I may be wrong and never got around to it, to just source the shit yourself and skip the horse and pony show with a psych or doctor. This guy that is a friend of my mother and has been very good to me and my room mate, he has infections in his legs, along with gout and a whole host of other problems- it's really sad, he had his weekly visit from the nurse today to have his wraps on his feet and legs changed and the birch mentions he is on a medication for gout- then later recommends he needs to up his protein in take "like cheese and yogurt"...this wasn't his normal nurse, but still, you know this dude has gout also, sure, if it were just a 'wound' then that would be good advice, but not coupled with his gout shit going on. They also don't have him on any real pain pills and my,mother usually buys him or sells him shit once a month- I introduced this man to T-PAIN because well... Fuck her and making money. She acted like I was stepping all over her game. Fuck her, the old guy was in bad pain after having his legs undressed and redressed. He really liked it too. I am almost out of my shit (thanks to this guy, I have shit coming tomorrow) but I could not stand to see this guy, who is one of the kindest old fuckers I've ever met, to be nearly in tears. I've offered him shit before, but he's always said no, hewasnt that bad but today He paused and said maybe, so I knew Damn well he was hurting bad. Its a sin, this guy who is a fucking war hero, fucked up by agent Orange in Vietnam has to sit with legs that are literally raw fuckking meat with no fuckin pain meds- last time he was hospitalized he was given pain meds for two months in the hospital and sent home with Jack shit. His doctor should be castrated with a shotgun to the groin for failing to provide any relief to this guy. Oh- last visit, he expects him to lose weight- fuck, if you're in that much fucking pain and you walk on raw legs, you really don't want to get up and move around that much. This guy can't even Jack off if he wanted because his thighs and groin area are so swollen, he can't even find his fucking cock and has to piss in a jug- he has a wall of pretty girls in his bathroom, while cleaning his room,for him I stumbled across his porn stash- I feel so bad for this guy. I hate doctors, if there is a hell, I'm sure it'll be filled with medical professionals.
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2016-07-12 at 4:27 AM UTC19 messages and I get the "cannot be completed" page? Life must be some kind of error. After waking I wondered whether there would be a mass spreading of my gospel of techno-Buddha, people attempting to contact me due to finding The Ultimate Truth. Either that or it's some glitch/hack I've never seen before or spam, but hopefully not because the former could stroke my ego until it erupts into the heavens. I've also thought of (an alternate) naming of my philosophy, or one of its core tenets, Ultimate Humility (acceptance of (possibly) fundamental human ignorance/uncertainty).
I essentially became enlightened. I didn't really care at all TBH, I just stayed up playing video games. Acts of creation really are one of the finest ways to spend time until the end. There's feeling of wanting to experience all of them, every moment.
I was also reminded of Terrance McKenna's talk, or writing, about DMT, which was based on what he was able to retain after many trips) and the recurrent experience he and others had of the "machine elves" (he described them as being like self-dribbling jedieled basketballs) and how they essentially sing objects into creation, things that are impossible ("matter can't do that") and possibly sentient themselves and doing the same thing, at least some of them or some of the time. That he realized, or understood/was told that after this at some point they begin attempting to teach him, telling him, compelling him, to do the same. So he feels the this thing welling up inside of him and coming out his mouth, then the act of glossolalia occurs, IRL as well, and he accomplishes it. Also another thing anecdote about one of the things they do being jumping into your body, which he described as disconcerting, and he or someone else later realized/learned/believed they were experiencing human lifetimes.
That aside, what I found interesting was his observation of how much of world essentially is, and has been, founded upon sounds we make with our mouths, and is continually being modulated. The diaphragm > lungs > vocal cords > mouth and tongue. I'm not sure if it was him of or a thought I had about how this ties into computer science/programming and in a way you're turning language into creation, which is a beautiful way of thinking about it.
Lanny, you will also be an apostle. I ask of you to build upon this, to contribute what your specific skills can. You're already a strong utilitarian, going as far as to adhere to vegetarianism and stating your willingness to engage in self sacrifice; I believe this may resonate with you. I have a feeling computer science specifically, other than obviously being the primary means toward AI, may, or will even likely, have certain key insights, the implications of concepts (I remember your post about eval/apply). Then there's the worry that genius physicists and mathematicians may also be required, but be too far into autism to value philosophy.
No, I'm not really serious, but I do feel a shift beginning in my mood and outlook on life/worldview. -
2016-07-12 at 4:33 AM UTC
*coughs*
You should read it. After the Schopenhauer quotes it deals specifically with Buddhism. Oh, what's the point?, you're too stupid to understand/correctly interpret it anyway and are just going to go off on a moronic tangent even if you do believe there is some value in it. -
2016-07-12 at 6:33 AM UTChttp://philosophy.lander.edu/logic/symbolic.html
We are going to set up an artificial "language" to avoid the difficulties of vagueness, equivocation, amphiboly, and confusion from emotive significance
Amusing, although not something I wouldn't have suspected, that doesn't seem to be an integral/necessary part.
"Man can do what he wants, but he cannot want what he wants."
Ultimate humility. Prostate yourself before the machine and accept that it is a "higher being" than you, a being capable of miracles (pure reason), that is able to enact things that are impossible for you, and follow its probabilistic gospel.
It's already beginning, it began long ago, but now it's accelerating. We're abandoning more and more of ourselves to it. Think of suggestion algorithms. Imagine an elderly person, the archetype of a narrow and close minded ignorant conservative, who chose to never use a computer or smartphone and knows hardly anything about it, has been exposed to barely any information about it (It may seem amazing to some how much you can choose to be insulated.), being told about this.
"You're letting machines choose what movie you're going to watch?!?! Are you fucking crazy?! You're telling it me you just let it choose whatever it wants and that's it, you don't even think about it? Back in my day we used to read about what was good, listen to others, ask for advice, talk about it, go browse the store and look at what seemed good. I'd heard about kids being chained to the TV, but I never imagined...you're practically enslaved by it!"
"No grandpa, we're being liberated."
It's beautiful.
God from the machine. We accepted that there was no god, so we attempted to create one instead, and not in our image. Destruction, eternal damnation, hell; heaven; or something beyond our current ability to comprehend? Faith and hope died as well, there was no need for either anymore.
Also, is there any reason why we couldn't (theoretically and plausibly) use artificial gravity wells as an alternative to cryonics? Of course I know you'd be killed in something like a black hole, but what if the gravity isn't being fought? Like astronauts in orbit, the gravity isn't actually much less than at sea level (around 10% less), there's a lack of contact forces, a constant free fall.
Gravity shielding doesn't seem possible, so unless a method is found in the future it doesn't seem like an option. What if you essentially did something akin to replicating what's occurring to astronauts in space. Could you create an enormous gravitational force, sufficient to have the necessary time dilation effect, and ramp it up so that it begins rotating and increasing in power with the containment unit matching it?
Then again there's the question of how you would actually do it, generate/increase/concentrate gravity (Well, miniature black holes have been made.), the containment of of the gravity well and controlling the rotation or how to set it in motion properly, and I don't even know if the containment unit would follow it as would be required, along with problems from size, the energy needed, and deceleration.
This is the kind of stupid question a kid who's read too much science fiction (I actually haven't.) would ask his physics 101 professor. My motivation: The present sucks, I want to maximize my chance of making it to the singularity, and I only care about reaching the end point.
Now I have an urge to watch Stein's Gate again (damn the opening became catchy). I've had enough thinking for now.
“When we read, another person thinks for us: we merely repeat his mental process. In learning to write, the pupil goes over with his pen what the teacher has outlined in pencil: so in reading; the greater part of the work of thought is already done for us. This is why it relieves us to take up a book after being occupied with our own thoughts. And in reading, the mind is, in fact, only the playground of another’s thoughts. So it comes about that if anyone spends almost the whole day in reading, and by way of relaxation devotes the intervals to some thoughtless pastime, he gradually loses the capacity for thinking; just as the man who always rides, at last forgets how to walk. This is the case with many learned persons: they have read themselves stupid.â€
Don't quite agree, attaining knowledge is of great benefit and can be connected/integrated/analyzed while doing so. On the other hand, I ended up thinking myself miserable/insane. This is why I don't like to read at a quick pace during works that particularly warrant it, either due to being great works with deep meaning, or simply highly enjoyable, I constantly stop to reflect and imagine. On the last note, long ago I did realize how little people verify, the flaws in the architecture of their mind, and why so many teachers and scholars have become so stupid in their own way. Beneath them ("You need higher education to be this stupid.") Students being taught what to think, not how to think (transfer of learning, the idea that there's an indirect benefit from things such as math is false (At least for the overwhelming majority. A truly gifted individual could lead himself to deeper implications or be directed toward areas for self-learning.)) Related to my point: http://heterodoxacademy.org/2015/09/14/bbs-paper-on-lack-of-political-diversity/
Caring more about grades, retention (cramming vs. spaced repetition). I've rallied against the education system's immense flaws before, I don't wan't to continue.
Damn, feels like there was a final line I forgot. It was probably just a joke anyway.
