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The R'tarded thread: The Shitfucking Edidtion 💩🖕

  1. All I've been thinking about for like a week is some weird looking girl from 8th grade, and getting all upset about it out of nowhere, and I'm making myself cringe at how pathetic it is to the point of suicide. My life is so devoid of social interaction that I'm still thinking about a middle school crush, and probably everyone else I knew is living somewhat normally and successfully and has actual friends and hobbies. These ruminative thought processes are getting so fucking lame I'm ashamed at my own existence. This is what happens when you dont meet any new people for 10 years.



    this 4/10 fugly bitch i havent seen in a decade means everything to me i love her!!!!11 i don't remember ever facepalming at myself harder than i am now, i've never realized i'm this much of a loser before holy shit.
  2. Big League Jew Tuskegee Airman
    Also don't listen to anything Sudo the retarded tryhard says. Fuck ego death. Fuck your hippie bullshit. Fuck all this shit. There is no easy way. There is no magic bullet that will make you want to do the shit you are supposed to do. There is no shortcut. A flip isn't just gonna switch. Nothing will make a shitty job less shitty. You have to grind through it.


    You just have to learn to be a person. There's no other way around it. You have to start from the very basics you are missing. There's no shame in that if you are working on it and recognize it. You are already self aware. You are a smart kid. The thing is you smarted yourself out of suffering, ever. It's ok to suffer. It's a part of getting everything you ever wanted.
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  3. Vitamin G African Astronaut
    Sploo gonna take exactly zero of this advice.
  4. Big League Jew Tuskegee Airman
    Originally posted by Vitamin G Sploo gonna take exactly zero of this advice.

    No, I actually don't think so this time. Retardation is a state of mind. There's nothing wrong with him, he is in what is known as a "funk". His problem is that he got a particularly chronic case. And when it gets like that, it feeds on itself and grows. But recognizing it and acknowledging the path out is the first step.
  5. Basically it's get any job at all and go outside to social events. I guess I knew this already, and I'm also the laziest person in the world. Either I will make something of myself and start working out and become Chad, or I'll live a shitty life of being a homeless holding up signs for crackmony. The first one sounds better. Whenever I'm sober for 2 days I start whining about how badly I've cucked away many years, around a week sober I start having motivation to do things besides lay down. Drugs have been the #1 causative factor of my failure but being sober is a different kind of hell. Once you ramp up your dopamine production to 500%, even being at the regular 100% never feels like enough. It's a permanent anhedonia. The substance abuse causes my depression and the depression causes my substance abuse and its an endless cycle of failure. Knowing these things and enacting them is a whole different set of skills that I have not yet mastered.
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  6. Big League Jew Tuskegee Airman
    Eh it's a little overrated. Being sober makes a day feel like 48 hours for me. I feel like I literally cannot fill my hours. But that's kind of a good problem to have... Finding shit to fill up your free time that you're interested in. Once you start bringing in money you can actually try out some shit. Go to a community college and sit in on a course you might enjoy or listen to a podcast while on an elliptical. You just need to start getting used to going out and being a normal dude.
  7. Well besides that there's also the mental health issues that make it harder.

    My OCD is stupid bad to the point where showering everyday causes me intense anxiety because I'm scrubbing myself for an hour straight losing my shit. If I had to take out the trash or unclog a toilet I would have a panic attack from touching anything with germs, touching random surfaces or the dishes in the sink will make me have to wash my hands for 5 minutes straight. Being a functional person is especially hard when doing just about anything causes fear.

    Social anxiety makes me 100% convinced that everyone I talk to thinks I'm retarded, then afterwards I spent like an hour hyperanalyzing two second slices of information from an interaction and psyching myself out that I must have the worst social skills in the world. This is just from basic interactions. Another thing I have a particularly hard time with is actually showing my real personality to people. I have like a fake nice passive persona that I have difficulty breaking out of, like there's a total dissociation between how I act in real life and how I post on here. It's hard to make close friends when I'm unable to show them who I really am, so in having close personal conversations I'm locked into a role I act out.
  8. Big League Jew Tuskegee Airman
    Yo I super relate on the ickyness thing. Serious Pro tip: buy nitrile, latex or vinyl gloves. They are cheap as fuck and it is EASY. I am sort of a germaphobe myself, I use gloves while attending to my cats' litter, wiping up anything dirty, dusty, clumps of hair on the bathroom floor etc. Literally buy yourself a surgical mask if it makes you feel better about fumes and scents etc. It's mostly psychological but it helps if I have to clean up something worse, like my asshole cat will shit out of his box sometimes. Wear a set of dirty clothes from your hamper while cleaning if it makes you feel better about getting down on your knees and elbows etc.
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  9. Anxiety makes you a prisoner in your own mind and body.
  10. Big League Jew Tuskegee Airman
    As for social anxiety, that's another matter of crash coursig yourself. Bars are useful for this. People are drunk and don't give a fuck if you're nice. They will chalk it up to you being drunk. Don't be a dickhead, when in doubt shut your mouth and smile at someone. Don't approach touchy subjects. Talk about normie shit. Even if you don't know, you can turn it into a question and get them to tell you about it. People love telling you about themselves and shit they know about. Questions are great. Don't ask dumb ones, stick to normie and nice shit. Like I said, this is just a matter of crash coursing it. You have to get used to being in social situations. There's no shortcut. But there are good ways to do it.

    Also, start weaning yourself off your technology. Make yourself like 2 hours a day to dick around on the internet until you have other shit going on.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  11. Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 Even mild opioid withdrawal is shittier than the comedown from just about anything, mostly because it lasts so long



    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 I have no friends and no life. I only leave the house to go to the store. Im bordering on being incapable of taking care of myself, and Im too tired to even move my body most of the time. I have no hobbies or passions, the only thing ive done for fun in years is get high enough to focus on video games. As a teenager this wasnt too abnormal, but now that Im in my 20s with no life skills, no experience, and total social isolation Im thinking im bound to just be forever alone and a non functioning human. I dont have opioids to brighten my mood so I now can analyze how hopeless and dead my situation really is. Ive already missed out on the important parts that would define my life, squandered all my social relationships. How the fuck I can bounce back from this and become someone who isnt a loser I have no idea. I am so lonely for years and I have nothing to look foward to but a computer screen and my body is weak and tired like an AIDS man



    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 Like I have no idea where to start making friends again that i would actually want to be around, and even if i did what would i have to say for myself "im 22 and ive never accomplished anything and i have no job and my parents do my laundry for me". Its like im permanently going to be frozen in time as a 13 year old before i started inhaling toxic fumes, who missed out on every developmental stage afterwards. Sometimes I wonder if i genuinely have some form of mental retardation or autism or parkinsons disease because i dont think ive ever met someone who destroyed their own life as blatantly as i have



    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 All I've been thinking about for like a week is some weird looking girl from 8th grade, and getting all upset about it out of nowhere, and I'm making myself cringe at how pathetic it is to the point of suicide. My life is so devoid of social interaction that I'm still thinking about a middle school crush, and probably everyone else I knew is living somewhat normally and successfully and has actual friends and hobbies. These ruminative thought processes are getting so fucking lame I'm ashamed at my own existence. This is what happens when you dont meet any new people for 10 years.



    this 4/10 fugly bitch i havent seen in a decade means everything to me i love her!!!!11 i don't remember ever facepalming at myself harder than i am now, i've never realized i'm this much of a loser before holy shit.



    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 Basically it's get any job at all and go outside to social events. I guess I knew this already, and I'm also the laziest person in the world. Either I will make something of myself and start working out and become Chad, or I'll live a shitty life of being a homeless holding up signs for crackmony. The first one sounds better. Whenever I'm sober for 2 days I start whining about how badly I've cucked away many years, around a week sober I start having motivation to do things besides lay down. Drugs have been the #1 causative factor of my failure but being sober is a different kind of hell. Once you ramp up your dopamine production to 500%, even being at the regular 100% never feels like enough. It's a permanent anhedonia. The substance abuse causes my depression and the depression causes my substance abuse and its an endless cycle of failure. Knowing these things and enacting them is a whole different set of skills that I have not yet mastered.



    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 Well besides that there's also the mental health issues that make it harder.

    My OCD is stupid bad to the point where showering everyday causes me intense anxiety because I'm scrubbing myself for an hour straight losing my shit. If I had to take out the trash or unclog a toilet I would have a panic attack from touching anything with germs, touching random surfaces or the dishes in the sink will make me have to wash my hands for 5 minutes straight. Being a functional person is especially hard when doing just about anything causes fear.

    Social anxiety makes me 100% convinced that everyone I talk to thinks I'm retarded, then afterwards I spent like an hour hyperanalyzing two second slices of information from an interaction and psyching myself out that I must have the worst social skills in the world. This is just from basic interactions. Another thing I have a particularly hard time with is actually showing my real personality to people. I have like a fake nice passive persona that I have difficulty breaking out of, like there's a total dissociation between how I act in real life and how I post on here. It's hard to make close friends when I'm unable to show them who I really am, so in having close personal conversations I'm locked into a role I act out.

    yay i'm freakin out again!
  12. Big League Jew Tuskegee Airman
    The thing with depression is sploo... Think about your mind like "mental real estate".

    When you have little to nothing going on, your life becomes focused on nothing.

    You might have one bad conversation and it fucking kills you because it's the last time you spoke to a human being and it was the first time in 2 days or whatever. When it is 1/200 conversations you had that week, it doesn't matter.

    If you have a job, a relationship, maybe studies, a hobby. Then one of those things going wrong isn't the end of the world. Whereas if you have little going on, then having a bad turn in one thing doesn't seem devastating and world ending, because your world is bigger than that. You have other shit to occupy your mental real estate. Otherwise all you have is petty bullshit and your mind has only one boring ass thing to be happy about, mull and obsess over, and then be fucking devastated by when it goes away.

    The world ends with you. It's your job to make your world bigger and capable of bearing more. Understand what's going on with your mind, recognize it when it starts zooming in on some stupid shit, and do something else. Try to go for a walk.
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  13. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    sploo get out of your head and go the fuck outside. It's a better world than the dadfighting spiderbasement. At this point ANYTHING you do is an improvement over the current status quo. You have nothing to worry about except your idleness destroying your once promising psyche even more
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  14. tomorrow I'm going to take a walk outside <3<3<3
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  15. Vitamin G African Astronaut
    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 tomorrow I'm going to take a walk outside <3<3<3

    Do it first thing in the morning.
  16. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 tomorrow I'm going to take a walk outside <3<3<3

    yeah man bby steps.

    I remember when I was on house arrest during zoklet I would get insanely paranoid wherever I went and in a way my paranoia comforted me and justified my behaviors. Then I used alcohol to cope with things because of it and steadily ruined my life over the next 2 years. Your "ocd" is obviously just a coping skill you use to justify not going outside in the same way. Work yourself up day by day until you're eating raccoon shit without thinking twice. That's what the shit about "ego death" is just basically getting outside your boundaries and comfort zone without preconceived notions and unnecessary feelings of being overwhelmed. My gf has bad anxiety and depression and has had people try to manipulate and take advantage of her all her life so she believes she's presented to the word as less than she actually is so it's a daily thing to try to get her to experience new things and realize she's been fed a lot of bullshit.

    You'll get there as long as you actually want to work to make your life better. Apathy will get you mumbling to strangers for fake weed money, just open yourself up to the world and you'll see yourself as more of a part of it
  17. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Sudo Do you listen to Die antwoord? I liked their movies. I would write remixes to umshimi wan in that scenario

    Pretty sure antwoord is south African
  18. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Holy ducking walls of scrolled up text. Dang Daniels
  19. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by mmQ Pretty sure antwoord is south African

    pretty sure I knew that but thought for some reason district 9 and chappie were set in north western africa but am pretty sure google just told me otherwise

    Pretty sure die antwoord is pretty saucy
  20. Vitamin G African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sudo pretty sure I knew that but thought for some reason district 9 and chappie were set in north western africa but am pretty sure google just told me otherwise

    Pretty sure die antwoord is pretty saucy

    I want Chappie 2 :(

    I fell in love with that shit and then they just ENDED IT.

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