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Niggas in Space > I've Got 99 Problems... and They're All Bitches > I haven't had sex in a while, should I go to a hooker?
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I haven't had sex in a while, should I go to a hooker?

  1. 2019-08-30 at 4:07 PM UTC
    #121
    vindicktive vinny Black Hole
    Originally posted by tee hee hee That's wonderful! Don't forget us little people when you get to the top eh

    dont worry.

    what went up must come down.
  2. 2019-08-30 at 4:36 PM UTC
    #122
    cigreting Dark Matter
    Originally posted by gadzooks I went 10 years without sex once.

    Honestly, I went a tad crazy, but it wasn't enough for me to shoot up a crowded public place or anything.

    It's not even worth it, really.

    Hookers charge like $100 MINUMUM, and that's for the low end chicks. You want quality, it's a $500 minimum.

    Honestly, just hit up pornhub and jerk it out, it's infinitely cheaper.

    I'm at over 6 years now. Not having to deal with women's emotional bullshit is great. I don't have to spend a dollar on any cunt. I'm also fucking ruthless in public to all women because I know what's on every one of their agenda.
  3. 2019-10-16 at 9:17 PM UTC
    #123
    Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country Dark Matter [my scoffingly uncritical tinning]
    Went to a different hooker tonight. Same house as before, but a different room - I assume the landlord is some sort of organised crime group that rent to prostitutes. This one was cuban. Her ad only specified half an hour for €60, which is about as cheap as you can get.

    She was very short and looked like a latin american indian, short and very big bum and boobs. Ad said she was 21, but she was mid 30s, about my age. She was very businesslike, and told me to take off my clothes. She sat me down on the bed and rolled on a condom with her mouth. She sucked a little, used her teeth, and it felt really good. Then we did reverse cowgirl, doggy, missionary, then she had me fap while she sat on me and rubbed my balls.

    I was done in around 15 minutes, but it was pretty good. I was impressed with how quickly she went through everything - maybe it could have been slowed down. It was very polite, hygienic and professional.
  4. 2019-10-16 at 10:28 PM UTC
    #124
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    ya, but did she look like crap m8 ?
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. 2019-10-16 at 10:32 PM UTC
    #125
    Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country Dark Matter [my scoffingly uncritical tinning]
    Originally posted by DietPiano ya, but did she look like crap m8 ?

    Actually I thought she looked pretty good. Beautiful exotic features and long black hair.

    Obviously she was older, so her boobies were a little saggy and she had a c-section scar, but I don't really care.
  6. 2019-10-16 at 11 PM UTC
    #126
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    I bet Brexit will reduce the number of quality foreign hookers.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  7. 2019-10-16 at 11:29 PM UTC
    #127
    CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    It's been close to 10 years for me. I kind of don't care. Care more about other shi t at this point like my finances and happiness.
  8. 2019-10-16 at 11:36 PM UTC
    #128
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I wish I had a billion dollars. I would fucking just go down the streets handing out money to all the homeless people. I'd give them 100,000 dollars and just take a picture of their face. But never post it online.
  9. 2019-10-16 at 11:41 PM UTC
    #129
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    Use funny munny
  10. 2019-10-16 at 11:41 PM UTC
    #130
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    Get a big check
  11. 2019-10-16 at 11:45 PM UTC
    #131
    frala Avant garde shartist
    Sucking condom dicks maaaaaan
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  12. 2019-10-16 at 11:48 PM UTC
    #132
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by frala Sucking condom dicks maaaaaan

    Its like buying a sandwich at a gas station and eating it with the plastic on
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  13. 2019-10-16 at 11:50 PM UTC
    #133
    GAAAAALM African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sudo Its like buying a sandwich at a gas station and eating it with the plastic on

    Have you sucked a lot of condom dicks? You seem experienced.
  14. 2019-10-16 at 11:53 PM UTC
    #134
    frala Avant garde shartist
    Originally posted by Sudo Its like buying a sandwich at a gas station and eating it with the plastic on

    Have you sucked a lot of condom dicks or just eaten a lot of gas stations sandwiches with the plastic on and pondered the similarities?

    =P
  15. 2019-10-16 at 11:53 PM UTC
    #135
    frala Avant garde shartist
    Goddamnit §m£ÂgØL fuck off
  16. 2019-10-17 at 12:03 AM UTC
    #136
    GAAAAALM African Astronaut
    Originally posted by frala Goddamnit §m£ÂgØL fuck off

    You were three minutes late. Go fuck yourself with a gas station sandwich.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. 2019-10-17 at 12:03 AM UTC
    #137
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    haha you think like §m£ÂgØL and §m£ÂgØL thinks like a dher which makes sense since his endgame for zoklet was to hitchike into a floridian assfucking
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  18. 2019-10-17 at 12:05 AM UTC
    #138
    GAAAAALM African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sudo haha you think like §m£ÂgØL and §m£ÂgØL thinks like a dher which makes sense since his endgame for zoklet was to hitchike into a floridian assfucking

    Not even true. Zoklet was closed by that time.
  19. 2019-10-17 at 12:07 AM UTC
    #139
    frala Avant garde shartist
    Hey the assfuckings hitchhike into me thank you very much
  20. 2019-10-17 at 6:25 AM UTC
    #140
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Originally posted by frala Hey the assfuckings hitchhike into me thank you very much

    post tits
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