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The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition

  1. The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. WE SMOOTH African Astronaut
    Originally posted by CASPER Teach me your ways, weese. Teach me how to get a UCLA educated stripper to fuck with me for my personality instead of bc I got the most fire H on deck.

    I really need to be talking to a woman right now, but I don't seem to care until it happens. HOW DO I MIRROR YOUR MAGNETIC PERSONALITY? PLZ CREATE YOUTUBE TUTORIAL?

    This was from bumble, i was about to go to sleep on a weeknight and I got a message from this mysterious profile saying "I think it would do me some good to get laid right now and I want to save us some time" so I risked the potential catfishing to meet up with her and then we hit it off.

    It's really been about making my dating app profiles better over time as i do more shit and get good pics of it. Also i try out new funny bios every so often. Meeeting girls at bars sucks. After meeting the first 10ish girls off the apps I don't even get nervous anymore, it's either gonna go well or terrible but i just be myself each time. Oh well. Lol.
  3. Ghost Black Hole
    i uploaded a youtube video, probably gonna get copyright striked by the creator because it has been purged but if he does then I have a backup plan and i'm gonna call him out publicly

  4. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Common De-mominator Lmao I love this.

    The ill fitting suit
    The clearly tied-then-slipped-on necktie
    The rough Luke Skywalker hair
    The scraggly chin beard
    The baby face
    The beat up leather shoes
    And best of all the extra erect, deliberate display of trigger discipline

    What a perfect picture

    the only thing that makes sense to me is he used the AUG to rob someone and is now wearing all their clothes
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. AUG is a sweet gun. I don't care much for the AR-15/Colt style weapons. I don't dislike them, but I have no interest in them.

    I had a .30-06 Remington 700, and that thing was a blast to shoot. What's great about 30-06 is you can get ammo in anything from like 100gr all the way up to 220gr (allegedly). I couldn't find anything over 180gr in the stores. The sweet spot for me was like 160gr with Remington ammo. I got sick of paying a dollar a round very quickly though, so I didn't shoot it much.

    Apparently I handle recoil very well, especially given how small I am. Anything under 180gr didn't bother me one bit. When I got a 9mm finally (although Beretta is a heavy gun) I was like "...Where's the recoil?". Even with one hand it was nothing. I thought about trading it for a .40 S&W because my brand new started jamming in such a way that I had to hit the fuck out of it while messing with the trigger and hope I didn't accidentally shoot myself in the process. It did that twice and I never shot it again.
  6. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    I've only ever shot a .22. I keep meaning to go to a range but never get around to it
  7. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    Bullpups are a generally superior weapon design for little to no downside. Gay homos like to deny this because they want a longer gunphallus to stroke off in their hands.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  8. .22 is fun, but imo it's not a whole lot funner than shooting a bb gun. Which reminds me, I need to go buy a bb pistol. I have bad luck with guns, I bought a tube-fed .22 that's like, something you'd buy at Sears 50 years ago, and it was worthless. The tube and firing spring were clearly shot and it barely ever fired more than once in a row, stovepiped and FTE all the time. Also, it started shooting burst fires sometimes, which would have been pretty cool had it not been dangerous a hell. I sold it back for a loss.
  9. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
  10. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  11. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Originally posted by DietYellow AUG is a sweet gun. I don't care much for the AR-15/Colt style weapons. I don't dislike them, but I have no interest in them.

    I had a .30-06 Remington 700, and that thing was a blast to shoot. What's great about 30-06 is you can get ammo in anything from like 100gr all the way up to 220gr (allegedly). I couldn't find anything over 180gr in the stores. The sweet spot for me was like 160gr with Remington ammo. I got sick of paying a dollar a round very quickly though, so I didn't shoot it much.

    Apparently I handle recoil very well, especially given how small I am. Anything under 180gr didn't bother me one bit. When I got a 9mm finally (although Beretta is a heavy gun) I was like "…Where's the recoil?". Even with one hand it was nothing. I thought about trading it for a .40 S&W because my brand new started jamming in such a way that I had to hit the fuck out of it while messing with the trigger and hope I didn't accidentally shoot myself in the process. It did that twice and I never shot it again.

    .30-30 is nice, as is 45/70 and 7.62x54r. Which reminds me I need to go out and find another M44 mosin. I had the action so perfectly hand polished that the slide came back like butter. And for the price, it's hard to beat those rounds. One of those can take down a deer easy. And there's still a fuckton of milsurp for it. Need to get my gun collection back up, but I feel like I'm on some kind of blacklist- despite the fact that I would almost definitely end up being the "good guy with a gun"
  12. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    I'll take a lever action .44 anyway. Great velocity out of the long barrel. Super reliable, super accurate. Great penetration, n easy to cast bullets and handload. Would be high on my lost of TEOTWAWKI guns.
  13. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Common De-mominator

    shaving cream: not even once
  14. mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    Originally posted by Octavian

    See, but this angle tells me everything about this woman.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  15. mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    Originally posted by WE SMOOTH Cause, I was just playing it super cool but when I started having ego loss and shit I figured I would drop her a line

    I'm glad I just didn't keep waiting forever lmao

    That's alright, that's what I would've wanted you to do, Marcos.
  16. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Originally posted by WE SMOOTH This was from bumble, i was about to go to sleep on a weeknight and I got a message from this mysterious profile saying "I think it would do me some good to get laid right now and I want to save us some time" so I risked the potential catfishing to meet up with her and then we hit it off.

    It's really been about making my dating app profiles better over time as i do more shit and get good pics of it. Also i try out new funny bios every so often. Meeeting girls at bars sucks. After meeting the first 10ish girls off the apps I don't even get nervous anymore, it's either gonna go well or terrible but i just be myself each time. Oh well. Lol.
    Yeah I think that part of the problem. I don't have any decent pics of me out doing anything which makes it obvious I'm a homebody loser. I need to refine my profile n shit, the one I have right now is all self deprecating and sarcastic, with no full body shots ...which should always be a red flag.
  18. Originally posted by DietYellow J are you quitting your job then? No point in slave dogging it unless you must.

    Also, I love hospitals. I probably wouldn't as much if I had to stay long term but I haven't so…


    I love hospitals.

    Nah, I'm still working because I'm buying and doing all the shit I've always wanted to do but didn't because it would ruin my finances

    Apparently the dyskinesia has gotten so bad they're starting to notice though

    I actually like hospital too but not unless I'm completely incapacitated and I would hate to have to stay more than a week or two

    I know it's sick but one of my most fond memories was the last time I was in the hospital with rhabdo. I'd had an IV in for a week and was about to be released. Don't know if it was the heparin shots or what but when the nurse pulled it out blood went EVERYWHERE and she was trying to stop it

    She was probably the most beautiful woman I've ever met

    Then whenever any of the other nurses or doctors came in they freaked out because of the 8 inch diameter blood spot on the bed and for some reason I thought it was absolutely hilarious

    Originally posted by Common De-mominator Lmao I love this.

    The ill fitting suit
    The clearly tied-then-slipped-on necktie
    The rough Luke Skywalker hair
    The scraggly chin beard
    The baby face
    The beat up leather shoes
    And best of all the extra erect, deliberate display of trigger discipline

    What a perfect picture

    Yeah, I bought it off a co-worker

    I thought it fit well other than the sleeves, shows how much I know/how often I wear nice clothing

    I didn't tie it before I put it on though, lol

    And the trigger discipline thing wasn't intentional. The trigger guard is just huge on that gun

    Originally posted by DietYellow

    Believe it or not I was thinking the same thing when I read your post about being hospitalized for hyperkalemia

    But I don't want to do that because for some reason there's a difference in my mind between what I'm doing and suicide

    Originally posted by Common De-mominator Bullpups are a generally superior weapon design for little to no downside. Gay homos like to deny this because they want a longer gunphallus to stroke off in their hands.

    Agreed. Only thing that sucks is mag changes feel totally unnatural. I'm sure I'll get used to it though

    Comparison between Aug and AR with equivalent barrel size:

  19. Also, when the fuck did it become so difficult to buy syringes?

    Fuck.
  20. Really? I've always been able to buy 100 of any gauge from the pharmacy, no questions asked.

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