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The Retarded Thread: Malice Metro Edition

  1. Octavian motherfucker
    Originally posted by Sudo Look how hard you're trying right now. Look at the lengths you are going. You're clearly crippled with insecurities which are most apparent to those who know you IRL. Just do u babe but I implore you my good sir to checketh thyself lest thou wrecketh thineself in a way that is quite comic to use one of those abverbial words (not that I know what that means!)

    *Conquered, did not read.*

    For someone I actually had respect for you have let yourself go. So sad and surprising really. Ah well.


    Life is good. 😎😎😎😎
  2. i'm so fuckin stoned right now
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    I'm about to get crunk at the club too.
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  4. Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by mmQ There is a theory going around that James (the current jeopardy dominator) is on the spectrum. I can see it especially since yesterday there was a category where he was spelling the answers (questions) like it was nothing. I dont personally think hes autistic but I can see how one could make a case .

    Things that malice would say for two hundard?


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  5. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Originally posted by Sudo The future is gonna be so fucking awesome as long as I'm not in jail. I'm praying something good happens to someone I care about tomorrow. I'm getting fucking big and fat from taking juice. The guy I know who makes it is a fucking mess though although I know he's legit I just worry about the sanitation. Life is weird

    Yeah as tempted as i am to get on some roids, idk if i want to risk a massive abscess from some guy synthing shit in his kitchen next to his cats litterbox.
  6. Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by mmQ What it do?

    What it be?

    Suck my ass?

    Let it be?

    Jon
    Ron
    Don

    Mow the lawn Jeremy.

    Mom. I dont feel like it. I'm playing fortnight.

    Jeremy. Mow the lawn or your ass is grass.

    Hahah mom ok.

    I got a trivia question wrong last night. It was literally :how long is a fortnight?: and I didnt know. I guessed 15 days because I thought it was two weeks and a day
    . Bakers dozen was floating in my head too . 13. But it was 16. It also asked how many lines in a Shakespearean sonnet and we guessed 12 like some common bitches . Th4 anseer was also 16. So sad thought and pray

    14 its two weeks lol

    Do you guys say biweekly or summing?


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  7. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    The new kid at my work has to be autistic. I dont want to be mean and ask. He makes the same lame joke ever and over again, every single fucking day. Among the gems; "WHAT IF I GIVE AWAY THE BOXES FOR FREE?!" and "HAS ANYONE EVER COME INTO THE STORE NAKED?!"" and his very favorite "SEE YOU TOMORROW GUYS!!" (on friday). He squeals and makes weird noises n shit.

    I told him if he doesnt stop being a faggot, im going to very aggressively start sexually harassing him, and every day at work is going to be like prison for him.
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  8. Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Good call casp


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  9. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Yeah threatening to punch him in the throat wasnt enough of a deterrent. blowing softly into his ear and giving him a strong back massage was. lol.
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  10. Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    There's something about Marys brother


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  11. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Joke of 30 seconds ago.

    *Looking at a shoebox sized box*

    "Is that a BOX?"

    *no response from me*

    "Is that a BOX?"

    *still no acknowledgement"

    "Ive never SEEN a box that big"

    *still ignoring him*

    "Ive never seen a box this big in my ENTIRE LIFE!"

    Me: Your father is going to die from shame. Youre killing your father, ______

    "My daddy LOVES me"

    Me:
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  12. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Just saw the only girl to give me a titjob at the grocery store next to my work. She was with another dude i played basketball with. Apparently theyre engaged now and moved nearby.

    Little italian chick. Like 5'7" Nice ol D titties....somehow perfectly perky (mightve actually been large Cs). Shoulder length brown hair. Always squeezed nicely into a pair of jeans. Super cute face....kinda like a pretty elvish face, always smiling. Those classic italian eyebrows.

    She was fun. She just thought it was a riot to jerk off the tall dudes in the away game bus.

    Im surprised the asst coach never got fired. Something like that could never happen nowadays.
  13. Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by CASPER Joke of 30 seconds ago.

    *Looking at a shoebox sized box*

    "Is that a BOX?"

    *no response from me*

    "Is that a BOX?"

    *still no acknowledgement"

    "Ive never SEEN a box that big"

    *still ignoring him*

    "Ive never seen a box this big in my ENTIRE LIFE!"

    Me: Your father is going to die from shame. Youre killing your father, ______

    "My daddy LOVES me"

    Me:

    Just cum in his ear


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  14. HTS highlight reel
    Originally posted by CASPER Joke of 30 seconds ago.

    *Looking at a shoebox sized box*

    "Is that a BOX?"

    *no response from me*

    "Is that a BOX?"

    *still no acknowledgement"

    "Ive never SEEN a box that big"

    *still ignoring him*

    "Ive never seen a box this big in my ENTIRE LIFE!"

    Me: Your father is going to die from shame. Youre killing your father, ______

    "My daddy LOVES me"

    Me:

    And this is why I never leave the house.

    I don't wanna be that guy.
  15. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    That kids sounds like someone I would bully the fuck out of and abuse to forward my "political" ends in the workplace.
  16. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    Although he probably too much of it during school already.
  17. Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    Or maybe he didn't get enough, since he's still such a faggot.
  18. Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by Common De-mominator Or maybe he didn't get enough, since he's still such a faggot.

    You ain't here for the sardines are ya son?


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  19. it kinda sounds like he's trolling you casper
  20. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Originally posted by Common De-mominator Or maybe he didn't get enough, since he's still such a faggot.

    Yeah he just has to be the center of attention soooo much. He also talks about how "hes antifa", and the glory of socialism, unironically.

    Originally posted by OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III it kinda sounds like he's trolling you casper
    Hes trying- hes dfinitely a "memer", but you can also tell he was that kid in school who was the "class clown" and constantly needed validation. Hes only 18 anyway.


    Originally posted by OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III it kinda sounds like he's trolling you casper

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