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Malice's Autopsy Report

  1. Society is really not very good at dealing with autists. It is MOST natural for us to intentionally push the buttons of autists to watch them blow up and explode and (now unwittingly) become immediately hostile and mass kill people. However, the autists have evolved to be considered "Too retarded to kill or be punished for acting innapropriately at all times". This is an advantageous survival trait acquired by them through Natural Selection.

    Non-autists will eventually need to either:

    1.) Learn to refrain from pushing the buttons of autists to avoid getting mass kilt, or

    2.) Genocide the autists. This is a matter of survival, and the autists are gaining steam in their (literal) war against the non-autists, whom they utterly depend on. They are actually clever in some ways, completely unbeknownst to them.
  2. Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by Octavian What I meant was finding out what he put in the note.

    I thought that was the whole note.

    Originally posted by Octavian As for the spastic, you do realise that's what I was thinking, not actually doing?

    Obviously i didn't think you'd actually beat a kid to death, all i am saying is that's quite some colorful language to describe what should have been mild annoyance. On second thought it should have been whatever it was i am not the one to decide what you get to think, i just thought murderous rage was a funny reaction to autistic screeching.
  3. Why did they include the school shooter accusation stuff? Why is that relevant, they didn't directly tie that to anything else in the report...
  4. Narc Space Nigga [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by RisiR † Did they weigh his cock and if so, how? Did they chop it off or what?

    Didn't we cover this in a Fred like a year ago?


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  5. Narc Space Nigga [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by DietPiano Why did they include the school shooter accusation stuff? Why is that relevant, they didn't directly tie that to anything else in the report…

    I don't get it. Why would his school in Cali pull him in whenever there was a school shooting somewhere else? Like why they link it to him? Did they know about his totse/zoklet use?


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  6. -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    How much does a penis weigh?

    To calculate the penis weight we'll have to do some calculations first. A dick having a volume of 20 cubic inches would be found to weigh 12.25 ounces, or about 0.77 pounds; some dicks are going to weigh in at more than a pound!
  7. Narc Space Nigga [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by -SpectraL How much does a penis weigh?

    To calculate the penis weight we'll have to do some calculations first. A dick having a volume of 20 cubic inches would be found to weigh 12.25 ounces, or about 0.77 pounds; some dicks are going to weigh in at more than a pound!

    Is that min or max weight?


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  8. Darkhunter Yung Blood
    I missed this guy. He was alright outside of his fucking cats.
  9. -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Narc Is that min or max weight?


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    Average. Depends on how much blood gets pumped in.
  10. Narc Space Nigga [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by Darkhunter I missed this guy. He was alright outside of his fucking cats.

    Holy shit it ain't?


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  11. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Originally posted by Darkhunter I missed this guy. He was alright outside of his fucking cats.

    My dude.

    Good to see you man.

    Rizzo is on here too.
  12. Narc Space Nigga [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by Darkhunter I missed this guy. He was alright outside of fucking his cats.

    I ftfy


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  13. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by inert_observer then malice is definitely in hell right now and we will all be there one day



    he doesn't like you either, that's why you're going to hell

    I WANT to go to hell so checkmate, God
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  14. Narc Space Nigga [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by mmQ I WANT to go to hell so checkmate, God

    Same, heaven sounds lame AF, all the boring people go there.


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  15. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    I think heaven is just wherever and whenever you were most happy. Just a DMT thought loop in your dying brain. If that moment was getting shitfaced drunk at a campfire with a few friends, thats where you'll "go" when you die.
  16. ive got a book of matches
    ive got a can of kerosene
    ive got some bad ideas involving you and me
  17. Dregs African Astronaut [that freakishly double-edged allmouth]
    didn't know him but this is some deep, dark, and depressing shit. guessing he ain't suffering anymore, well one would hope. i couldn't ever off myself i prefer the suffering in living no matter how bad shit has been or will get. a glutton for punishment many other ways too. still can understand why he did what he did though on some level. rest in peace.
  18. GGG victim of incest [my veinlike two-fold aepyornidae]
    is this some kind of hipster metaphor for a dead person?
  19. GGG victim of incest [my veinlike two-fold aepyornidae]
    Originally posted by -SpectraL How much does a penis weigh?

    To calculate the penis weight we'll have to do some calculations first. A dick having a volume of 20 cubic inches would be found to weigh 12.25 ounces, or about 0.77 pounds; some dicks are going to weigh in at more than a pound!
  20. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    I just noticed that 3/4 of the people who thanked the OP are Captain Falcon alts. rofl.
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