2019-03-11 at 12:47 PM UTC
Reading pg 3
&,$& Chri** (praise him) how did you guys forget Malice speppe thread already? Like.. the link to the profile that clearly WAS him was posted right in that thread after we determined malice1 was NOT him.
It was incredibly coincident that both malice and that guy both killed themselves at the same time, and it was also VERY interestin
Oh my God.
...
Oh my god, he might not be dead.
Ok, ok, here is speculation be warned.
So the user who found Malice1 was "Doofusrick" who I believed at the time was genuinely a lurker who just came here to read malice, and I guess sophie because he said so. He commented aon malice's drug threads a couple times long before the sepp.
Doofusrick ALSO found malice's real SS profile, which is clearly the malice by the writing and contents, and especially that it was his reddit name IIRC. I'm sure someone here still has it.
Basically I accepted that doofusrick was actually just a malice lurker, as he was the of the biggest show pony's for myself coming back here as well. It makes sense.
Logging this...
I now think there's a good chance doofusrick may have been malice. I think it's more liekly that it wasn't, but I never thought of it the other way before.
Seriously, how did you guys forget all of this so quickly?
2019-03-11 at 12:56 PM UTC
The thing about Malice is that, I basically started posting on this forum was to talk some sense into him.
I told him incessantly that if he wanted to get better he would need to stop trying to look for the magic pharmaceutical bullet, and actually try to change his behavior. He wouldn't see me on that.
I DID however get him to believe that his chemical schemes were pointless and that they would never work, especially after he had a honeymoon with meth, all gee gawed about it, and I told him it's not gonna be helping much in a couple weeks. He didn't believe me, but once he saw I was right, and also that everything else I was saying was right, he began giving up hope in pharms.
Then he got very, very depressed.
Then he got suicidal for a long period of time.
Then he caught a ride.
I honest to God think that if I started posting here, it would at least have delayed his departure, as I helped him take away his own hope through reason. I still don't know how I feel about that.
I mean whether he's dead or not is kind of irrelevant. I offered to meet in person, and he didn't want to. For me, he's really just a proxy for the hundreds of thousands of miserable people that just don't see a way out, and end up signing off permanently. And god knows I've felt like that. Shaking, sick, in my bed with a pillowcase that smelled like stale sweat and bile....not a single dollar to my name. The house dead silent after being screamed at for a solid hour. Staring at the same wall that I scratched little pictures into as a 10 year old.... I just felt like time had stood still and left me behind, and that the fucked up truth no one had ever bothered to clue me in on- is that it's very possible to make a series of decisions so devastating that there's no coming back from that. I bought a gun for the express purpose of killing myself. I knew when I finally worked up the courage, I needed to have it there, like a security blanket. I've posted the plan I worked out before.
I get it.
And it sucks that people can get that unhappy.
It's not about HIM really. It wouldn't be the first time someone faked some fucked up shit online. But it's kind of irrelevant.
Idk. I'm searching LA coroners records right now. Like I said I'm sure it'd be possible to figure out if anyone gave a fuck enough to take the time. Lanny,would you be able to pull IP addresses or some kinda hax? I thought it was Pomona, but even just knowing the exact city would help.
2019-03-11 at 2:03 PM UTC
Oh fuck.
Fuckkkk
I feel sick.
2019-03-11 at 2:04 PM UTC
God damnit you fucking loser.
I'm crying.
2019-03-11 at 2:09 PM UTC
Fuck.
I didn't need this shit today.
Still shitting on everyone from beyond the grave. You'd be thrilled.
2019-03-11 at 2:09 PM UTC
I found his coroners report.
2019-03-11 at 2:10 PM UTC
I didn't think I would. It's been so long, I just figured it'd be more nothing.
2019-03-11 at 2:11 PM UTC
Fuck this. I'm not dealing with this today. I'm just not.
2019-03-11 at 2:12 PM UTC
Grylls
Cum Looking Faggot
[abrade this vocal tread-softly]
hey sit down, calm down, take a sip of water
deep breaths
2019-03-11 at 2:48 PM UTC
I'm convinced all Japs are predators.
2019-03-11 at 3:32 PM UTC
Malice isn't dead I just smoked crack with him a few days ago
