User Controls
The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition
-
2015-08-05 at 8:44 PM UTC
Yeah I don't know what it is lately but I've been spending more time talking about how shitty of a person I am/feel. Obviously drinking every fucking night isn't helping me get out of my depressed rut, but shit the alternative is to sit around my place, sober, like watching tv or whatever the fuck people even do. As I've expressed and you are aware, I essentially have little to no interest in anything in my life right now, save for my kitty and drinking with the TC crew so I can at least have a semblance of friendship and social interaction. I don't know why it so humbling to read your post just now- I wouldn't even have seen it if not for sophey making mention of it to me. I don't like to make people sad.
Anyway I've been trying to research 2-fma and while the reviews mostly seem positive, I'm still finding myself scared when I read some of the potential harmful side effects, like the supposed or possible liver, kidney, and heart damage. I mean, I get that is an RC for just said reasons, and pretty much everything has potential harmful side effects, so I'm inclined to still try it, but I'm just being a bitch about it. At the rate I've been drinking and smoking, I've probably done more liver and internal damage than dozens of grams of these fluoridated amphetamines would do, so it's strange to be so scared, but then again, I don't want to die or like go into some weird cardiac arrest while my cat sits on her tree confused as to why I'm foaming and convulsing on the floor.
So far I can only find it for $30 a gram, but I haven't looked that hard, and I will continue to research a bit and look around. This is all new to me. Thanks for offering your help. kbye
Save your money and skip the drugs, they all do nothing but temporarily mask symptoms which just manifest even more severely once the shit wears off. Depression is a progressive disease with few effective treatments and the ones that are effective are only effective for a small subset of people.
Either learn to be one of the people who carry on listlessly hating themselves and the world around them on a day to day basis like me or kill yourself and get it over with and I mean that in the nicest way possible.
-
2015-08-05 at 9:06 PM UTCPOC is always a ray of fuckin' sunshine
-
2015-08-05 at 9:34 PM UTCSpeaking of public shootings my friend worked in the silver spring, MD area at the time and was still in highschool at the time. He had a part time gig at a party store and they had him dress as a clown and hold a sign right near all those shootings when they were going down before those niggers got caught. I was rolling laughing when he told me. They shoulda just stuck a bullseye on him. Inwas gonna send my mother a tshirt with a bullseye.. Had they shot that cunt I would have donated money to their defense.
-
2015-08-06 at 12:08 AM UTC
-
2015-08-06 at 12:52 AM UTCThe killdozer was one of the greatest crime sprees in recent history
-
2015-08-06 at 12:57 AM UTCmalice is a psychopath
-
2015-08-06 at 2:01 AM UTCbuying Crouton instead of poppy seeds is saving me about a hundred bucks a week
the euphoria isn't as good, but then again, it is much less sedating then 'real' opiates.
I just want to thank kolokol and giygas for recommending this stuff.
-
2015-08-06 at 2:24 AM UTCI'm supposed to be doing research for something I wanna do.....something bad idea-ish..... but instead I'm just fucking around on here and /r/CombatFootage/. I need inertia
-
2015-08-06 at 3:20 AM UTC
The killdozer was one of the greatest crime sprees in recent history
malice is a psychopath
buying Crouton instead of poppy seeds is saving me about a hundred bucks a week
Have you thought about growing your own? The giganteum strain could be a good choice, it's aptly named.I'm supposed to be doing research for something I wanna do…..something bad idea-ish….. but instead I'm just fucking around on here and /r/CombatFootage/. I need inertia
https://www.reddit.com/r/watchpeopledie/top -
2015-08-06 at 3:38 AM UTCI was always under the impression that Crouton was often not active when grown outside of southeast asia, and I live in zone 6. I have successfully grown trichocereus peruvianus here, though.
I am bored with watchpeopledie, I want to see some fighting rather than just dying. War has everything; action, danger, heroes, villians, bravery, cowardice, humor, and even love. -
2015-08-06 at 4:17 AM UTC
I was always under the impression that Crouton was often not active when grown outside of southeast asia, and I live in zone 6.
Oh, I meant poppy plants. It's pretty easy and they don't look suspicious. Also grey area, actually, due to being a common ornamental plant (they're the same species, both produce opium) as long as you aren't growing them for drug production and don't do so, which of course they shouldn't be able to prove. -
2015-08-06 at 4:32 AM UTC
Yeah I don't know what it is lately but I've been spending more time talking about how shitty of a person I am/feel. Obviously drinking every fucking night isn't helping me get out of my depressed rut, but shit the alternative is to sit around my place, sober, like watching tv or whatever the fuck people even do. As I've expressed and you are aware, I essentially have little to no interest in anything in my life right now, save for my kitty and drinking with the TC crew so I can at least have a semblance of friendship and social interaction. I don't know why it so humbling to read your post just now- I wouldn't even have seen it if not for sophey making mention of it to me. I don't like to make people sad.
Anyway I've been trying to research 2-fma and while the reviews mostly seem positive, I'm still finding myself scared when I read some of the potential harmful side effects, like the supposed or possible liver, kidney, and heart damage. I mean, I get that is an RC for just said reasons, and pretty much everything has potential harmful side effects, so I'm inclined to still try it, but I'm just being a bitch about it. At the rate I've been drinking and smoking, I've probably done more liver and internal damage than dozens of grams of these fluoridated amphetamines would do, so it's strange to be so scared, but then again, I don't want to die or like go into some weird cardiac arrest while my cat sits on her tree confused as to why I'm foaming and convulsing on the floor.
So far I can only find it for $30 a gram, but I haven't looked that hard, and I will continue to research a bit and look around. This is all new to me. Thanks for offering your help. kbye
Hard to say how safe any RC is but anecdotally at least I've gone though a decent chunk of 2-FMA and 4-FA with no noticeable lasting effects (well positive effects I guess if you count the improved focus/learning you can get done). Worst that's happened to me is when I took what was, in retrospect, way too much 4-FA I had a significant blood pressure spike and headache which I took an aspirin for and went away in a half hour. You can overdose if you want to I guess but it's not like you're hand is going to shake when measuring something out and you bite it. Standard harm reduction practices and there's really minimal risk of fucking yourself with moderate use. -
2015-08-06 at 4:36 AM UTCI really want to grow some poppies, but I can't do it at my house, my one neighbor is a retired deputy sheriff and his wife, and they keep their yard immaculate and covered in 'better homes and gardens' caliber landscaping. My dogs sometimes piss through the chain link fence into their yard and I am sure they hate me because I don't give a shit what my yard looks like and it really does look like shit. They would know in a second what I was growing. "Hey look, mabel...the guy with knee-high weeds for a lawn, is all of a sudden growing a wildflower garden!" I always meant to drive around and scout out some nearby areas, but then I lost my drivers license and I pay people to drive me around. I guess I could walk....I tried to use google maps a few years ago to scout around for places, and I never could find my house on it....I am extremely bad with directions and I still get lost here after living here for almost 19 years. I am a retard sometimes.
-
2015-08-06 at 4:46 AM UTCI am definitely not sure about the inactivity thing, I don't know a goddamn thing about Crouton except that it works well for me. I just heard in passing that it was inactive unless grown in certain areas, and have never confirmed it for myself. My old plant nerd friends from spiritplants.com have scattered to the four winds, so I can't even ask someone who would definitely know, there were some actual botanists there back in the day. But, if it's true that it is inactive when grown outside of southeast asia. then it is most likely possible to recreate those conditions with certain environments and soil media.
-
2015-08-06 at 5:02 AM UTCFuck the weed I have right now is fucking too strong, I reliably have a mini-panic attack every time I smoke it. That's two weed induced panic attacks so far this evening. I don't get anxiety ever, except from drugs, and I fucking hate it. It reminds me somewhat of an adrenaline dump, which I haven't felt for years because I have been chased, beat up, accused, confronted, ambushed, thwarted, and caught so many times that I thought I burned out the part of my brain that produces adrenaline, what's it called? the pancreas?. medulla oblongata?I am probably going to die soon anyway, I keep getting whats it called...hypertension. I just turned 40 recently and the people in my family don't live too long, we are angry and twisted as a people and tend to die in mid-50's. I have been through so much shit I bet I don't even make 50. This is why I'm on painkillers, because my body is wrecked. I have the fear right now. Fuck.
-
2015-08-06 at 5:06 AM UTCOk I'm done with the retarded thread, you guys can have it back. I'm still scared.
-
2015-08-06 at 6:02 AM UTCFuck, look at this qt. http://imgur.com/a/cjeRN Those eyes and nips.
Yeah I am.. Not a bad thing, but I wanna go down the road of science and it sure as fuck isnt gonna be some doctors bitch as an RN. As of right now Ive got all my prereqs for the RN program which I could further in a NP but fuck that.. Id bitch slap a doctor and thatd be the end of my medical career. I dont much wanna go into social science nor business either.
Pure science degrees are a waste of money. You should consider being a nurse, You can get jobs like at home care where you don't have to be a doctor's bitch. Working at an outpatient surgery office would also be cool. I think it would be awesome to be a flight nurse or a CRNA if you want to further your career after your RN. Xray/rad/ultrasound techs, respiratory therapists, and physical therapists are also good to get your foot in the door in the medical field.I was always under the impression that Crouton was often not active when grown outside of southeast asia, and I live in zone 6. I have successfully grown trichocereus peruvianus here, though.
I am bored with watchpeopledie, I want to see some fighting rather than just dying. War has everything; action, danger, heroes, villians, bravery, cowardice, humor, and even love.
https://www.reddit.com/r/ultraviolent/ -
2015-08-06 at 1:59 PM UTCshe looks half retarded, 1337. It really doesn't matter to me, though, I've fucked much, much worse.
also, some of those videos are really, really fucked up. thanks! -
2015-08-06 at 5:15 PM UTCski ski desu~
-
2015-08-06 at 5:41 PM UTCConsider this, hydromorphone: they hire RN's to oversee the distribution of methadone at the methadone clinic, and they pay damn good, too. When I went there, they were going through nurses every six months due to diversion/theft. The clinic owner was known to take a hefty daily dose himself. He was a nutcase, but in a good way.
