2018-08-19 at 4:12 AM UTC
Sudo
Black Hole
[my hereto riemannian peach]
I gobble handfuls of xantac and pantoprazole to no avail
How long do I have to live?
2018-08-19 at 4:48 AM UTC
Only God can tell. But you should probably see a doctor.
2018-08-19 at 4:53 AM UTC
According to my analysis, you have 4,063 days, 2 months, 3 weeks, 4 hours, 52 minutes and 42, 43, 44, seconds to live.
45, 46, 47...
2018-08-19 at 4:55 AM UTC
Wait, the seconds supposed to be backwards, darn irrational time capsule. Work dammit! ðŸ˜
2018-08-19 at 5:01 AM UTC
Excuse me while I continue reconfigurating my penis pump into a well converted time capsule. So far, it's been a failure, but I have brilliant Albert Einstein determination. This intervention will work! Even if I have to stick my dick in it! This will be my greatest creation.
2018-08-19 at 8:08 AM UTC
Cootehill
African Astronaut
[my unsymmetrically blurry oregano]
Are you farting/burping a lot?
Are your shits all watery?
2018-08-19 at 9:14 AM UTC
kroz
weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
eat more probiotics you idiot
2018-08-19 at 9:14 AM UTC
kroz
weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
Originally posted by Sudo
My doctor is literally an arrogant American draft dodger who doesn't listen to anything I say. I need a new doctor
i blame the jedis
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2018-08-19 at 10:02 AM UTC
the pat-man
Tuskegee Airman
[overshadow that snuff-brown nestling]
probably something boring and chronic like crohns
2018-08-19 at 10:21 AM UTC
5 to 6 times is quite a lot. What are u eating??
2018-08-19 at 12:06 PM UTC
Stop eating dairy and gluten.
2018-08-19 at 12:29 PM UTC
Grimace
motherfucker
[my enumerable hindi guideword]
We're internet doctors and I have diagnosed you with Bill Krozby Disease. It's much like Crohn's Disease, except that you have a tendency to lie and rape women to make you feel better about your abysmally poor self esteem. If you would like more information, please visit Bill Krozbydisease.com
2018-08-19 at 12:54 PM UTC
Life is overrated anyway you'll be much happier dead.