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The Retardest Thread: Fashionably Late Edition.
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2018-04-26 at 1:01 PM UTCI want to eat fresh waffles and pancakes.. with strawberry and maple syrup and butter, blueberry chocolate chip whipped cream.. fuck that sounds amazing
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2018-04-26 at 2:32 PM UTCneed opinions
does this go hard?
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2018-04-26 at 3:10 PM UTCi got 7-11 tacquitos instead lol
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2018-04-26 at 3:52 PM UTCI would guess most of you either have no clue who he is or hated the guy if you did but dude was pretty motivational and at times said exactly what I needed to hear. RIP Brah, you da illest.
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2018-04-26 at 3:52 PM UTCWho’s this fag
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2018-04-26 at 3:54 PM UTCannoying australian bodybuilder who had too much coke and imploded
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2018-04-26 at 4:02 PM UTChe was an alright dude, fucking perfect aesthetics too yes homo
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2018-04-26 at 4:31 PM UTCLSD, you should read this if you’re interested: https://www.longecity.org/forum/topic/71485-my-wonderful-50-day-experience-with-therapeutic-doses-of-methamphetamine-desoxyn-healed-my-mind/
There are other user reports that come up if you Google “meth microdosing”.
Pharmaceutical D-meth, or as close as you can get to it from clandestine syntheses, taking at low oral doses (3-10mg), is very different from typical street meth use.
I’ve posted studies before that actually demonstrate some fascinating beneficial effects at these doses, taken orally.
Also, I don’t expect this experiment to actually work, to be enough to make life worth living, allow me to function well enough to reach my goals. I do take into account behavioral modifications, such as exercise and regular fulfilling socialization. My problems are just incredibly treatment resistant. A.utism is simply a horrendous crippling disorder that’s extremely complex and has a vast array of effects. The unfortunate reality, and this is strongly supported by a wealth of evidence, is that the vast majority of people on the a.utism spectrum never manage to succeed and have tragic lives. Even among those with college degrees the unemployment rate is an astounding 85%. There are numerous other statistics on outcomes that paint the bleakest picture.
Being able to read well and convey yourself intelligently only shows you a tiny aspect of a person’s life.
Bad parents, bad city/environment, bad schools, lack of diagnosis and treatment, unbelievable levels of social isolation and alienation (This has the strongest set of long term negative effects out of anything), severe chronic anxiety, severe social deficits, severe chronic depression, extremely weakened ability to experience pleasure/positive emotions, and among those on the spectrum being “high functioning” (this term is misleading because it’s simply relative to classical autism) actually increases your risk of suicide.
I have all the factors for an extremely high lifetime risk of suicide. Bipolar disorder and schizophrenia also have very high lifetime suicide rates, and most of the factors I mentioned also increase this risk. People like PoC and Bipolar High Roller understand what living with a condition like this is like.
It’s probably too late for me at this point in my life, I’m already 28 and the development of my brain has been permanently affected. IRL I’m not even close to coming across as high functioning as I do online.
Then again, for people with ADD proper treatment can be profoundly life changing. Dextromethamphetamine is about as powerful a treatment as you can get.
It’s not going to change anything about the external world, though. Other people and the world they’ve created will always be a hell to me. The only chance for a fulfilling life is to devote myself to my intellectual pursuits, before my depression reached a level of severity that destroyed me. I’m not sure I can ever return to that state due to how I’ve changed, my philosophy/worldview, how profoundly disillusioned I am. I’ve completely lost interest in the world and have lost any sense of wonder. The latter issue may be the most massive obstacle to a scholarly life. Solving problems like it’s a game/challenge just isn’t the same.
There’s a good chance I’ll simply utilize the effects of meth to study Schopenhauer, related philosophers, and a set of books on Buddhism, as preparation for death.
With meth therapy I may have the energy and motivation yo turn suicide into a project. An idea I have for the end is to have a continual encrypted stream, so my location won’t be discovered, where people can send me questions. The method of death would be through extreme self deprivation, slowly starving myself to death, and devoting all my time to meditation, study, and contemplation. Prior to this I would extensively document what led to this and write on various subjects.
In a text file I started one day and abandoned, although it ended up being fairly lengthy, I speculated on why the Buddha forbade monks from recording anything. Buddhism has a fascinating history, and for the highest level of monks some practices may have reached extreme levels. I speculated that at some point some may have chosen to undergo the process I described and utilized it to convey what they learned from the most extreme point of human existence. Interestingly I later learned that this form of suicide was the only one Schopenhauer truly respected.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-04-26 at 4:41 PM UTCGood post
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2018-04-26 at 6:20 PM UTC
Originally posted by Malice With meth therapy I may have the energy and motivation yo turn suicide into a project. An idea I have for the end is to have a continual encrypted stream, so my location won’t be discovered, where people can send me questions. The method of death would be through extreme self deprivation, slowly starving myself to death, and devoting all my time to meditation, study, and contemplation. Prior to this I would extensively document what led to this and write on various subjects.
You realize that like the founding myth of buddhism is a rejection of extreme asceticism, right?The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-04-26 at 6:28 PM UTC
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2018-04-26 at 7:25 PM UTCIt's amazing what a difference a low dose of etizolam in the morning makes. I don't feel any compulsion to redose, don't seem to develop side effects or experience a rebound/comedown effect, no euphoria. It's just total normalization of critical aspects of brain activity. Fasoracetam is also excellent for normalizing the glutamatergic system, enhancing choline reuptake, both of which are highly relevant to a.utism, as well as treating ADD, which has a high comorbidity with the 'tism.
I'm considering experimenting with inducing dopamine hyper-sensitization by using very low doses of dextromethamphetamine (1mg or less) daily for a prolonged period. These effects can last a long time. There are serious risks, which is why I would be extremely cautious. I wonder if something similar could be achieved for serotonin with a serotonin releaser like MDAI. Serotonin levels in particular seem to be abnormally low in ASD, and this could alleviate numerous issues.
For the dopamine, I wonder if inducing hypersensitivity could be a good treatment for abnormally low basal hedonic tone, low mood, anhedonia, deriving little pleasure from live, ADD, things like that.
If it also hypersensitizes norepinephrine I would be fucked.
Hmm, yeah, probably best to just stick to my low dose meth regimen plan. -
2018-04-26 at 7:34 PM UTCJesus christ, life just gets so fucking old fast. There's only so much variation. Especially if you have memory quirks, advanced pattern recognition, and are a hyper-systemizer, you just begin to notice and ingrain all these underlying patterns in things.
It's novelty that's a critical issue.
"If it wasn't for drinking I wouldn't know what to do with myself."
Well, hopefully meth will fix this issue. Yeah, it probably will, pretty standard to make some things seem far more fascinating.
Mark my words, Lanny, you have no idea just how old life rapidly begins to feel. It's probably a major part of why people begin to make the idiotic decision to have children in a primitive and futile attempt to find meaning in their life.
Seriously, give me some advice for how to fill my time if anime and video games just don't cut it anymore, people are boring as fuck, wilderness is nothing but endless repetition, I don't like food and hate eating, reading has long lost its joy, travelling would simply lead me to other people and buildings I have no interest in, see no beauty in.
There's just no escape. Well, there is one way out of the human predicament...
"Develop a passion in life." Nothing appeals to me, the reality doesn't come close to the ideal, attaining a career ruins it for the vast majority.
I just don't know what to do. Maybe the meth regimen will send me back into maddo scientisto mode. -
2018-04-26 at 7:56 PM UTCno one cares
go write in a diary to stop annoying people -
2018-04-26 at 7:59 PM UTCI kinda feel he will give up on the suicide thing if people stop reading his long drawn out rants of WOE IS ME
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2018-04-26 at 8:23 PM UTC
Originally posted by Juicebox I tried something like this, and after what feels like ages, I eventually started to feel like I was in sleep paralysis, but never actually fell asleep
Also, the "hold" section of those breathing things always seems to mess me up. I don't know why, but it always seems to ruin the relaxation part of it. So I usually end up just inhaling slowly, then exhaling very slowly.
oh i love sleep paralysis, its so cool, such a trip. i haven't had it in over 10 years now tho.
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2018-04-26 at 9:52 PM UTC
Originally posted by Malice Jesus christ, life just gets so fucking old fast. There's only so much variation. Especially if you have memory quirks, advanced pattern recognition, and are a hyper-systemizer, you just begin to notice and ingrain all these underlying patterns in things.
It's novelty that's a critical issue.
"If it wasn't for drinking I wouldn't know what to do with myself."
Well, hopefully meth will fix this issue. Yeah, it probably will, pretty standard to make some things seem far more fascinating.
Mark my words, Lanny, you have no idea just how old life rapidly begins to feel. It's probably a major part of why people begin to make the idiotic decision to have children in a primitive and futile attempt to find meaning in their life.
Seriously, give me some advice for how to fill my time if anime and video games just don't cut it anymore, people are boring as fuck, wilderness is nothing but endless repetition, I don't like food and hate eating, reading has long lost its joy, travelling would simply lead me to other people and buildings I have no interest in, see no beauty in.
There's just no escape. Well, there is one way out of the human predicament…
"Develop a passion in life." Nothing appeals to me, the reality doesn't come close to the ideal, attaining a career ruins it for the vast majority.
I just don't know what to do. Maybe the meth regimen will send me back into maddo scientisto mode.
Do you have any fear of death? Not will it hurt or am I going to heaven or hell, but the fact it's an unknown. -
2018-04-26 at 10:24 PM UTCMalice has to kill himself so he won't have to admit to himself or anyone else that he couldn't manage to get through one semester of college.
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2018-04-26 at 10:35 PM UTC
Originally posted by Count_blah Do you have any fear of death? Not will it hurt or am I going to heaven or hell, but the fact it's an unknown.
“Death is not an evil, because it frees us from all evils, and while it takes away good things, it takes away also the desire for them. Old age is the supreme evil, because it deprives us of all pleasures, leaving us only the appetite for them, and it brings with it all sufferings. Nevertheless, we fear death, and we desire old age.” ― Giacomo Leopardi
Death is nothing to us. When we're alive we aren't dead, and when we're dead there's no longer any identity to experience suffering.
It's like going to sleep and never waking up again. What's so bad about that? -
2018-04-26 at 10:35 PM UTC
