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Problems that can't be solved by killing yourself

  1. #1
    Lanny Bird of Courage
    1. Pre-existential desire to not be dead

    Any others?
  2. #2
    fag Houston
    Well it won't create your socialist utopia wet dream
  3. #3
    2. Being damned to hell
  4. #4
    3. Faggotry
  5. #5
    4. Family debt
  6. #6
    infinityshock Black Hole
    avoiding being the subject of a necro-rape fantasy by the person who finds your carcass.
  7. #7
    fag Houston
    Paranoia about someone desecrating my corpse is what keeps me alive. I need to kill this person before I die.
  8. #8
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    solve for x
  9. #9
    8. Critical faggotry

    In fact, suicide exacerbates it.
  10. #10
    infinityshock Black Hole
    Originally posted by fag Paranoia about someone desecrating my corpse is what keeps me alive. I need to kill this person before I die.

    go search the internet for how many mortuary workers are literally arrested for physically and sexually abusing carcasses if you want something to look forward to.

    when i get geriatric-incapacitated my plan is to jump out of an airplane from high altitude, sans parachute, a few hundred miles out over the ocean, wearing lead wraps around my limbs
  11. #11
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by infinityshock go search the internet for how many mortuary workers are literally arrested for physically and sexually abusing carcasses if you want something to look forward to.

    your chances might not be that bad - the ratio of pretty girls vs. creepy dudes with paedo goggles and shit moustaches seems (strangely) pretty even when it comes to people that interfere with corpses
  12. #12
    fag Houston
    I'm just going to cut my dick off and put a bunch of super glue in my asshole.
  13. #13
    infinityshock Black Hole
    Originally posted by fag I'm just going to cut my dick off and put a bunch of super glue in my asshole.

    post pics
  14. #14
    fag Houston
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  15. #15
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    no bestiality pls
  16. #16
    fag Houston
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. #17
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Errrr... dry and wrinkly skin? Body odor? Moisture retention? Stiff muscles?
  18. #18
    Originally posted by fag

    Cute
  19. #19
    world hunger
  20. #20
    being lanny

    you'll still have to be ashamed of the fact that you existed
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