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  1. Malice Naturally Camouflaged
    Originally posted by sploo i have a manly man brain

    Not manlier than an extreme male brain.

    ctrl + f "systemizing", starting at the second result: http://journal.frontiersin.org/article/10.3389/fnhum.2010.00224/full

    Further support for under-estimated intelligence and abstracting skills stems from the Extreme Male Theory, which suggest that the prominent cognitive style is auti*sm is prone toward analyzing the variables in a system, deriving the underlying rules that govern it and to construct, predict, and control systems (Baron-Cohen, 2002). This cognitive style is called “systemizing” and reads like a conglomerate of higher order cognitive abstracting capabilities that auti*stics were previously believed to be less capable of. Research by Baron-Cohen and colleagues suggests that autis*tics exhibit enhanced systemizing capabilities and evidence cited for this are savant talents, attention to detail, preference for rule-based, structured and factual information, higher scores on tests of intuitive physics, preference for toys such as cars, obsession with collecting items, obsession with closed controllable system, such as computers, and enhanced systemizing quotients (reviewed in Baron-Cohen, 2002).

    Sound familiar, remind you of anything or anyone? And of course Aspies will, on average, display the strongest and most advanced hyper-systemizing ability. This is also strongly impacted by personality variables, which are at the end of this post, along with habits of the mind. The latter is something I've been identifying through introspection/reflection my entire life, then refining, altering, any behavior I see as flawed or suboptimal, producing a detrimental impact. My mind is extremely consistent and rule oriented, almost machine like, robotic. I ingrain things unusually quickly and consistently. So, for example, if I desire to alter a social behavior once this is identified and the course of action determined I will decide to make an effort to remain aware of this behavior, and my memory will be triggered every time it arises, is merely beginning to, or even before it actually occurs, merely being about to, so I can then change to what I determined was optimal, and through this extremely consistent process, with far more instances to repeat this cycle than the vast majority of people, the new habit will become ingrained and integrated, continually refined.

    Clearly I still possess human interests and emotions, have certain needs due to my biological vessel. For example, I view and greatly enjoy high quality anime. The basis for addressing this is because this extreme-systemizing cognitive style, which I didn't fully describe and is one aspect of how my mind functions, albeit a core one, only applies to thoughts (This is a broad category, it includes behavior such as analyzation, for example, that is engaged in through thought.) on subjects that are not primarily for entertainment or insubstantial. Although those are what the vast majority of my thoughts are focused on when in at least a fairly healthy emotional-mental health-cognitive state.

    Something amusing I still recall was this post Lanny made:

    Originally posted by Lanny You have to think about Malice differently than other people. We treat most people as if they are the sum of their actions, if Bob steals from you or calls you a faggot then that's good reason to believe Bob is going to try to do you harm in the future. With malice that's not really the case, he's not as devoid of emotions as he'd like to believe but there is no emotional inertia. He won't avoid calling you out if you've had positive interactions in the past and he won't hold a real grudge. He's brought up the story of his former principal calling him the most destructive person he (the principal) had ever met repeatedly and that's clearly an enduring self image.

    You should engage him with that in mind. Interacting with him clearly has its charm, he's smart and highly entertaining but it's also kind of like interacting with a robot. Every conversation is closer to talking with a stranger than with a friend and the outcome is forgotten immediately afterwards. It's actually kind of refreshing once you get used to it, there's a kind of honesty in it, you don't need to try to spare his feelings and you know what you're getting is unenhancemented.

    The second paragraph was somewhat endearing. Although, also depressing in a way. Like an incomplete man. I'm fully aware of what I lack and am missing out on. Almost as if I don't possess something critical, the human element. Or at least a real emotional connection to others, normal relationships. I've isolated myself to such an extreme extent. My worldview, there's so much complexity I can't convey why, but it also has a profound effect on how I perceive the world, how it "feels", my thoughts, mind, being the center of my conscious experience, practically what I exist in, placing so much more value on it than average. I'm simply far more effective by it, by what I've accepted as truth, discovered about the world/life/reality/existence. Then of course there's the immense fear I have of intimacy, which I've stated is my greatest fear, even more than death before this point; interpersonal relationships, people attempting to become or becoming close to me, even developing or experiencing certain emotions, such as caring for others, empathy, attachment, or love. Along with all that, and immense fear of being hurt, the emotional pain being far higher than normal due to various factors, being greatly amplified in part from the neurological differences of aspergers.

    Well, there's a dichotomy. Despite not experiencing or having experienced the emotions, the events, ultimately, I view things differently. Like relationships, experiences with people, are a multivitamin, something to maintain or improve health, functioning. Ultimately I believe that the lasting positive impact, primarily mediated neurologically and by the endocrine system, by their modulation, is what truly, only, matters, not fleeting insubstantial pleasures that teach nothing I value. Then again, of course interpersonal relationships and the skills you develop, for the vast majority of people and their lifestyle, are an enormously important and beneficial part of life for most, a necessity. Countless examples of this, but, it truly isn't particularly valuable to me.

    Maximizing happiness isn't my goal. Happiness is only necessary for optimal biological function. There are bound to be strong diminishing returns to higher levels, to attempting to increase your average or baseline level of happiness, when factoring in the costs. Good enough to be optimal, to best allow me to achieve my higher goals, is the true/fundamental objective. It's related to Buddhism, renunciation. I genuinely stopped feeling the emotion of desiring happiness and became happier as a result. Not fully, with it never arising, behavior perfectly consistent with this belief and aim, of course.

    People often make the criticism of Buddhism and desire by stating they believe they need desire to achieve, but this is a misconception. I actually came to understand independently, without reading relevant material on Buddhism, just a basic understanding of this concept, possessing the prerequisites required to attain this, and then coming to an understanding through the hyper-systemizing cognitive style. This stems from this, which leads to that, connected to this. I described my cognitive style elsewhere. It's about the emotion of desire. Being discontent with your current situation because you desire something different, better. Feeling this emotion causes suffering and has no benefit. You can rationally recognize what is detrimental of your life and let go of the emotion. The original meaning, in the Buddha's language at the time, of "suffering" can actually be translated as uneasiness, or restlessness. At least this is crucial aspect of the concept. It's exactly what I'm attempting to demonstrate. So, perceive without "judgement", ascribing emotional values, categorization, to these matters. Let go of the suffering. See the path to the destination, then move toward it without pain of what you currently lack or due to aspects of the journey*

    *Difficulty, exertion, time required, costs, sacrifices, pain. As before, let go of judgements, don't dwell on them and develop, elicit, negative emotions, simply perceive and understand rationally. These negative emotions, thoughts, help nothing, improve nothing, they only perpetuate the suffering, cause/increase difficulty, negatively affect you in general.

    Do you understand now how to act, move forward (along the path), without the emotion of desire? This is what was truly meant. It's a process that takes time, is affected by a wide variety of factors, that you utilize various techniques for, knowledge and techniques that improve your development, accelerate it.

    Self-destructiveness has been a very strong factor in my life, but I rarely dwell on it, and it isn't something that I see as an integral part of my being, who I am, consider irremediable.

    As for why it was such a strong factor, well, I've had, and still possess, a wide variety of severe mental illnesses. I had a severe mental breakdown, with multiple negative developments during it, and was depressed near the maximum level for 3 years, suicidal, ruminating on it constantly, hourly without reprieve, with many symptom, ailments, exacerbating. I also hadn't fully developed as a person, cognitively, I didn't have the same knowledge and understanding I do now, beliefs, habits of the mind, other traits I've altered. I'm alive and am attempting the path to recovery now, though.

    social relations and togetherness are for pussies

    I know, right? I mean, think about how much time and effort it takes to develop relationships. On that note, even Lanny admitted the following. Oh, fuck it, nevermind. For some reason I can't find the post. At least I don't want to keep trying, it really stopped being worth the time after, like, 5 minutes, probably. But he basically said romantic relationships have been a massive time sink that amount to nothing for him. Well, not that he believes they're worthless. I also remember him adding something at the end along the lines of "women are pretty gay, tbqh".

    Not merely time spent IRL, in physical proximity, even through texting, phone calls, social media (facebook), and in their own mind, their thoughts, others simply consume so much of their time, so many resources. In their own minds, utilizing various aspects of their cognition directed toward others, such insubstantial and transient subjects; this could be toward far more important matters. The cumulative amount of time saved is incredible.

    I mean, if I had social relationships like a normie how on earth would I have enough time to pursue my vast array of interests, which are continually developing? I'm constantly discovering novel matters that I desire to ascertain, learn and analyze, and properly/fully integrate into my mind. Analysis of not simply the specific information, but how it functions in conjunction with and affects, the implications, that can be made for anything relevant and salient in my prodigious auti*smal data banks.

    God I have severe OCD. When something captures my interest I just have to keep reading reading reading, utilize my exceptional data finding abilities/skills to locate what I desire, I obsess over it to some extent. I mean, fortunately it isn't to the point where I can't stop thinking about it, I don't lie awake at night with racing thoughts about the subject, feeling unable to fall asleep until I achieve some goal, or with an urge to get up and read more, do something related to it, and it isn't all I read about during that period.

    Eh, it's normal for some people to do this to some extent at least, think of students, researchers, people who have major projects/goals in mind, hobbies or special interests, especially academics, at least if they aren't lazy and are productive, haven't decided to kick back when they receive tenure. Of course, outside of researchers and academics, although they are strongly influenced by external forces as opposed to purely being driven*

    *No, wait, this isn't even possible. We're all affected by the external. At the very least for me it's in a very different manner, what influences the average person generally either doesn't influence me or it does so to a far lower, commonly abnormally low, extent.

    by their own motives separate from their careers and the perceptions of others, their judgements. Maximized cognitive/psychological independence. Following your personal interests outside of that, outside of conventional and common paradigms, institutions.

    Originally posted by sploo

    mfw this is my personality

    I remember scoring, and of course I researched and chose a valid and optimal test, giving answers as realistic as possible, 100% thinking, 100% introversion, and 0% agreeableness. My openness score would likely be extremely high, matters generally determined on a purely rational basis (Yes, my mental illness, severe dysfunction, certainly does strongly impact my actions and has indeed greatly interfered with adherence to rationality). I was genuinely suicidal for 3 years and progressively deteriorating for extended periods, some symptoms progressively worsening the entire time.). Conscientiousness would likely be very low as well, similar to you. IIRC neuroticism may have been around mid range, somewhat above it.

    Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-08T05:41:41.406851+00:00

    Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-08T09:56:32.068971+00:00
  2. Lanny Bird of Courage
    Originally posted by Captain Falcon I'd fuck the white trash out of this garbage white dumpster slut

    + hair
    + nosering
    + cute overalls
    - tats
    - attention whore

    I guess she's 'aight
  3. How is that nose ring a + but the tats are a - ??? Nose rings remind me of bull fighting.

    Not saying her tats are nice though. The one on her inner arm with the face is kinda cool but otherwise they're terrible. Her hands look like they have tire treads. She probably wanted to get large spaces done really cheap.
  4. What is that test with the colorful doohickeys
  5. http://www.personalityassessor.com/bigfive/
  6. twistquest Yung Blood
    Originally posted by Malice Anyway, I helped a suicidal person with aspergers who contacted me on reddit. He read one of the really long threads or posts and related to me, thought I was the one that could give him the advice I needed. Sent me multiple very long posts about his life starting from an early age, what fucked he felt fucked him up, his thoughts, critical information, questions, tons of stuff. A multitude of serious issues.

    Anyway, I got around to writing some extensive posts with just the information he needed, by expert autismal analyze, and he told me it was exactly what he expected/wanted from me.

    I think I properly addresses every concern he had, made some recommendations as to what path in life he should take, used my wide knowledge base about specific/uncommon subjects, my aspie hypermemory (actual term, it really is related to asperger's) power to recall everything I had learned about these subjects and was relevant, even did some research and linked him to the studies etc.

    Maybe years from now he'll look back and see this as a turning point in his life.

    Thanks again man, I appreciate it.
  7. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by NARCassist yeh i found that out over 30 years ago kid.

    you can't be a day older than 13 surely?




    .

    well then why did you bold part of the post like me having sex for the first time at 18 has any bearing on whether or not im an "experienced masturbator" or something
  8. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Malice Then what do you criticize? How does your viewpoint differ (an outline/overview will be fine)? Why do you continue to live?

    Life creates a need where there was no need to be met. Universal mass suicide is the most logical thing there is.

    sentient life serves no more of a purpose than non-sentient life. in terms of presence, the world and the entirety of this plane of existence would be no better or worse if all life (and all matter, really) ceased. there obviously cannot be a dimension with such complexity that mankind will not even come close to understanding the scope of it without having a greater purpose. as much as atheists like to say that there is no god, it doesnt make sense that everything in the universe is here, period. there had to be someone or something that is beyond everything on earth, space, or reality as experienced by man to design and create it all. it couldnt just come from nothing; there had to be a point in time where even the events and matter of the big bang were yet to happen/exist. even if, for arguments sake, there was no purpose for mankind and all of existence in this dimension, wouldnt it make sense for man as a whole to create some sort of belief system to at least have some kind of false hope or pipe dream? if not, the only other option would be to kill yourself since your life or anyone elses wouldnt matter.

    there must be, and there is, a reason for being here. speaking as objectively as possible, there is no way that all of creation wasnt created by something, whether it be by pagan gods or christ.
  9. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by 霍比特人 How is that nose ring a + but the tats are a - ??? Nose rings remind me of bull fighting.

    Not saying her tats are nice though. The one on her inner arm with the face is kinda cool but otherwise they're terrible. Her hands look like they have tire treads. She probably wanted to get large spaces done really cheap.

    septum piercings look awful and the whole idea of them detracts from a womans femininity. its repulsive
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  10. Malice Naturally Camouflaged
    Originally posted by Captain Falcon (because my memory is trash, I'm easily able to understand stuff but memorizing stuff is shit)

    Summary: An argument for Captain Falcon's jealousy of my cognitive abilities, particularly the hyper-memory aspect of Asperger's (not all possess it, to be clear), and the psychological underpinnings, what leads to his along with me reprimanding, insulting, mocking, and belittling him. Showcasing his inferiority. His behavior.

    -What follows is optional, beginning with the Method of Loci and the thought that I have never bothered to any learn memorization strategies/techniques, a description of how advanced my visualization ability is, and how this cognitive fidelity, the accuracy and level of detail with which I can reproduce a path, simple from having passively, as opposed to intentionally and actively, stored this information, visualization skills, particularly of this manner, being pivotal for the Method of Loci, your affinity for it, the strength of the effect/benefits you gain from utilizing it, your potential. How I haven't unlocked the full prowess of my ability/skills and my memory could be taken even further with training, developing the habit, ingraining and integrating it. Who knows what the limits of my memory may be, particularly with how effective the Method of Loci is for the average person who properly learns and utilizes it, multiple aspects of myself causing my natural affinity to it, the benefits I would receive, and my potential, to be far higher.

    I wonder if this is in reality the primary source of your drive, regardless of you're consciously aware of it, to insult my intelligence, cognitive abilities. As if I'm merely regurgitating information (what you likely refer to as "autis*m" being mistaken for intelligence) with no understanding of what I'm writing.*

    *Oh yes, the vast amount of extensive posts I've made, you having admitted that you don't even read 99% of my posts and simply skip them. How in the fuck are you going to accurately gauge that, then? A simple definition for psychometric intelligence is "the ability to deal with complexity". A truly intelligent person would realize that if you're only reading 1% of my posts (Of course your estimate may be purposefully hyperbolous or simply inaccurate), likely the shortest and least substantial posts I write, it would be utterly idiotic to base your perceptions and judgements on your limited perception.

    I'm just slapping away at the keyboard and somehow the illusion of coherence is produced. Akin to a thousand monkeys typing on a thousand typewriters, who will soon produce the greatest novel known to mankind. Hurr durr, I have the autis*m virus, I'm mentally retarded and can't genuinely understand anything. Falco is such a genius in the field of autis*m specific neuroscience that he's discovered new symptoms, deficiencies and limitations, every single person on the spectrum has and is incapable of attenuating, let alone fully remedying.

    Or perhaps I simply copy and paste everything, despite that google will not return anything for a strict word search of my posts. Must be because I'm just rehashing the arguments of articles substandard in quality of writing and content which I just googled and read. Copying what someone else wrote and allowing them to think for me.

    You've consistently lied, made repeated posts, about your alleged absurd wealth, success, and lifestyle. You might claim you're trolling, but how are we supposed to understand who you truly are, develop an accurate view and gauge of you? Along with that you bring down others who attempt to demonstrate any pride, what you may (mis)perceive as pride, or above-standard ability. It's so consistent, you've been a member of this community for such prolonged spans of time, that these aspects of your personality are clea. You have a strong drive and desire to dominate others online, to feel superior to them, elite.

    Essentially, from the excerpt I quoted, it's clear that my autis*m/aspie power of hypermemory is one key aspect/trait that may evoke your virulence because it reminds you of your limitations, your inferiority and inadequacy, flaws, in certain respects. You can't stand it.

    Random note, in part to myself: I just had the thought that I never bothered learning any memorization techniques. If I were to learn the Method of Loci, whose efficacy will be augmented by the incredible neurologically mediated visual ability inherent to a large percentage of individuals with aspergers, I could take this ability to the next level. I already had a natural propensity to ace tests. I remember sometimes I would literally almost never pay attention in class, either lost in thought or reading independently, didn't do any homework or assigned reading, and somehow I would still manage to receive the highest score in a class. This is only an anecdote from school environments, of course nearly everyone here has noticed the hyper-memory.

    To give an example of my visualization ability. Well, I can easily conjure up detailed images of scenarios, even complex ones, of course with considerable movement, changing of the immediate environment. This is a basic question to identify people with poor or no ability. Past that, I can picture "myself", well, really just picturing something in my mind's eye almost as if I was a discarnate entity, just pure perception, although with my normal field of visual perception (I'm referring to the field of view, I am able to easily visualize from multiple perspectives, such as an aerial viewpoint.). For example, I can go through my entire cluttered apartment and know where everything important is, other than items under or partially buried in small piles of paper and other bits I should really throw away, what's behind every door, that is, in every cabinet, in the refrigerator, other containers, etc., move between vantage points either in a fluid or instantaneous manner, etc. Produce a detailed recreation which is allowed by various neurological factors, such as the hypermemory aspect.

    The same is true for the walk from here to the train station, I can visualize moving along the path and accurately recall it. Not very minor details, things that are insignificant. The fidelity isn't to the point where I can count trees along the way, or numerous small concrete square like structures along the side of the sidewalk. I don't have that level of power. Well, I haven't tried, at least. All this was stored in my memory without deliberately attempting to, passively.

    Random somewhat related minor story that came to mind, not important: I remember that in high school a science teacher I had was this really chill black guy. Anyway, I only did enough work for a C, but managed to receive the highest score on the final due to autis*m power. Afterward there was a simple assignment where he told us to write what grade we thought we deserved and possibly why, and I was honest and chose C. Sometime afterward, I recall he was in the class with just one other adult he was having a conversation with he asked what grade I thought I received and I think I told him C, and he told me I got A, likely do to my answer and performance on the test. That was a sweet deal, getting to skip the majority of the work for the entire class and still receiving an A. Eh, really not important or a good example of my abnormal memory.

    Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-08T09:51:13.906752+00:00
  11. Hahahahaha. Mal, you know no one is going to read that. Especially Falco.
  12. scrojus at honkledinkus
  13. cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Malice my cognitive abilities, particularly the hyper-memory aspect of Asperger's

    you dont have some kind of superpower, dude. the brain of a person with aspergers is pretty much equal to a normally developed brain in terms of function, in that your brain lacks in some areas and strives in others, vs the "baseline".

    despite your evident belief that your brain is "better", the average person with regular cognitive development functions well in ALL areas. autism is a disorder, not some kind of adaptation.

    its unfortunate that you were born with that deficiency, but it is what it is and you have to figure out a way to overcome it. leading a life of self imposed isolation isnt healthy, whether or not youre autistic. you wonder why you arent happy, but you resign yourself to living a life of watching anime to imitate some sort of social interaction, take countless drugs in attempy to find a "fixer", and make post after post of research and conjecture that is all centered around your clinging to the pipe dream that having aspergers syndrome somehow excuses or explains your lifestyle. you need to take a good look at yourself dude. you are very intelligent and are gifted, even with the mental handicap of aspergers. why dont you utilize that to do something greater than what you currently do day in and day out?
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  14. Lanny Bird of Courage
    Originally posted by 霍比特人 How is that nose ring a + but the tats are a - ??? Nose rings remind me of bull fighting.

    Not saying her tats are nice though. The one on her inner arm with the face is kinda cool but otherwise they're terrible. Her hands look like they have tire treads. She probably wanted to get large spaces done really cheap.

    IDK, I don't make the rules, nose rings just seem cute while tats do not.

    Post last edited by Lanny at 2017-07-08T08:17:51.546524+00:00
  15. ill eat your eyes hoe
  16. Malice Naturally Camouflaged
    Originally posted by cerakote you dont have some kind of superpower, dude. the brain of a person with aspergers is pretty much equal to a normally developed brain in terms of function, in that your brain lacks in some areas and strives in others, vs the "baseline".

    despite your evident belief that your brain is "better", the average person with regular cognitive development functions well in ALL areas. autism is a disorder, not some kind of adaptation.

    Lanny! I want you to read my response and tell me why you thanked that moronic post.

    This is absolutely false, you don't what the fuck you're talking about. Try reading this and see if you can understand it:
    The Intense World Theory – a unifying theory of the neurobiology of aut*ism
    http://journal.frontiersin.org/article/10.3389/fnhum.2010.00224/full

    I mean, for fuck's sake. :faceplam: " the brain of a person with aspergers is pretty much equal to a normally developed brain in terms of function, in that your brain lacks in some areas and strives in others, vs the "baseline". "

    This is so unbelievably simplistic. Alright, if my brain strives in certain areas, what are they? You do realize that there's considerable variation among everyone, "neurotypicals" as well as people with Asperger's. Do you understand how logically incongruent this is? How in the hell can you assume that the brain of every person with aspergers is, on net, "pretty much equal" to a normally developed brain when both vary considerably. Even if you were referring to averages this would still make no sense because of course not every person with Asperger's is the same, so how in the hell will they all be equal to, on net, the average neurotypical brain?

    The average neurotypical functions well in ALL areas? This statement isn't even true. It's only true if you define "functions well" as being determined by average level of ability, which would be tautological. "Think of how stupid the average person is and then realize half of them are stupider than that." Then what the fuck about people who are (well) above average? How would you describe how they function?

    Absolutely nothing else needs to be said.

    Of course there are drawbacks, I've stated and readily admitted this countless times. Jesus christ. And it's not as if every person with Asperger's is exactly the same, has the same symptoms to the same level of severity. There are so many fucking comorbidities, as well as highly beneficial traits that aren't even that uncommon among people with Asperger's. Hyper-memory is the actual term used in that paper. Even the beneficial aspects, which are far less common among neurotypicals and the general population, can vary widely in strength and other characteristics among those who possess them.

    Do you understand what the word/term average means, what it constitutes? Clearly you don't even understand something this basic. I want you to tell me, exactly what can on average differences tell you about an individual? Based on having an unbelievably unsubstantiated and critically flawed, immense inaccurate, view/opinion on the neurological constitution of neurotypicals and the general pattern of neurological differences in ASD and Asperger's, how exactly can you determine anything about me simply from what you stated you believe about these "average" brains and the information that I have Aspergers? You know what? You probably won't even understand what you're doing wrong do to having such an unbelievably low grasp of reasoning, your general reasoning ability likely being incredibly poor.

    its unfortunate that you were born with that deficiency, but it is what it is and you have to figure out a way to overcome it. leading a life of self imposed isolation isnt healthy, whether or not youre autistic. you wonder why you arent happy, but you resign yourself to living a life of watching anime to imitate some sort of social interaction, take countless drugs in attempy to find a "fixer", and make post after post of research and conjecture that is all centered around your clinging to the pipe dream that having aspergers syndrome somehow excuses or explains your lifestyle. you need to take a good look at yourself dude. you are very intelligent and are gifted, even with the mental handicap of aspergers. why dont you utilize that to do something greater than what you currently do day in and day out?

    I've literally already accepted and addressed everything here by this point in my life! You don't even have an accurate view of what I believe and why at all! Literally every single thing! I accepted many of these a long time ago, and I never believed that having Asperger's excused my lifestyle Were you not aware that I'm going to be attending university soon for a major I'm passionate about (philosophy) and enjoy? I made a post some time back detailing everything, every major thing, crucial aspects in life, that the it will help me with, the issues I have, have developed, improving a variety of traits, the academic and cognitive habits and abilities/skills, even getting used to being around people again and speaking, communicating, forming relationships.

    Also, what exactly do you know about me and how? You've already demonstrated your perception is incredibly inaccurate, largely founded on presumptions. The only things you know about me are from posts I make online, whichever you actually read, likely only a small fraction, what I voluntarily choose to share. You've never observed me in in person, you aren't a specialist or expert in ASD or Asperger's and haven't and can't conduct a proper extensive analysis, which can only be done in person. You have no real idea of what I'm like and who I am.

    Lanny, the term "weaponized autis*m" is a fucking joke from 4chan. Me calling my certain traits I possess that are at the extreme end of human variation, that have a neurological basis either directly tied or related to abnormalities of Asperger's, "autis*m power(s)" was also never meant to be taken seriously. :rollseyes: Do you remember when I used to mock you for the distinct style in which you would misinterpret/misunderstand what others had written, the meaning of words, what they meant, even jokes? This is one of those situations. Think about how ridiculous it is that you actually interpreted me as, assumed I was using, these terms sincerely. I even claimed at times that in exchange for all the drawbacks each person with autis*m received at least one superpower, one of mine being memory, along with something I've rarely mentioned and referred to as "perfect rationality". Of course that isn't fucking true! I swear to god you can be so dumb sometimes.

    Cerakote as well, what in the fuck do you know about auti*sm spectrum disorders and Asperger's Syndrome in particular? What have you read about them, how much time have you devoted to neuroscience, particularly that related to the autis*m spectrum, as an amateur hobby and interest, for how long have you studied this, how many papers and have you read, which ones, how do you generally locate and select them, gauge which are the most relevant and highest quality, how to properly interpret them, how much of them are you generally able to comprehend, how much time have you spent engaged in thought, in reflection, analysis, theorizing, connecting data, determining what follows, the entire complex thought process for gaining a full understand of a matter?

    You pretentious and presumptuous pseudo-intellectual fucking twat, you're a 23 year old brat that vastly overestimates his own level of knowledge and understanding, his competence, outside of his main fields of study. You're useless outside of computer science and philosophy, impotent. You are completely unqualified to have any opinion at all on the subject of ASD, to criticize or disagree with my views on the matter.

    Lanny!, stop acting like an idiot, embarrassing yourself, making simplistic, poor, and critically flawed arguments, and thanking posts like these. The reason why it particularly irks me, coming from you, is because you should be better than this. I've written before what my view of you is, particularly relative to myself, my own traits/qualities, even mentioning multiple traits of profound importance where I explicitly stated you were substantially superior. *slaps you hard across the face* Chucklehead, BAKA, HENTAI, light-novel protagonist!

    Read the post I quoted below and then realize that this is the person you agreed with and thanked, whose viewpoint you seemed to support:

    Originally posted by cerakote sentient life serves no more of a purpose than non-sentient life. in terms of presence, the world and the entirety of this plane of existence would be no better or worse if all life (and all matter, really) ceased. there obviously cannot be a dimension with such complexity that mankind will not even come close to understanding the scope of it without having a greater purpose. as much as atheists like to say that there is no god, it doesnt make sense that everything in the universe is here, period. there had to be someone or something that is beyond everything on earth, space, or reality as experienced by man to design and create it all. it couldnt just come from nothing; there had to be a point in time where even the events and matter of the big bang were yet to happen/exist. even if, for arguments sake, there was no purpose for mankind and all of existence in this dimension, wouldnt it make sense for man as a whole to create some sort of belief system to at least have some kind of false hope or pipe dream? if not, the only other option would be to kill yourself since your life or anyone elses wouldnt matter.

    there must be, and there is, a reason for being here. speaking as objectively as possible, there is no way that all of creation wasnt created by something, whether it be by pagan gods or christ.

    Nope, not even going to bother.

    Cerakoke, you are mentally retarded, I am never debating or discussing anything or particular complexity of importance with you again. You are simply irredeemably idiotic, irrational, and unknowledgeable.

    Wait a minute, were you the one that said you were 18? Shit, well, I've softened up over the years, especially during my 3 year period of depression and suicidality, become more understanding, compassionate, less malicious and virulent. That's a pretty young age, nearly everyone is relatively retarded in a multitude of ways, critical aspects, during that time. Even I was a jackass who made incredibly foolish decisions until my mid 20s. Took me a long time to really start figuring out life, the world, myself, what to do in this world, to begin to recover and work through a multitude of severe issues.

    Look, this is harsh, but all I'm saying is, that like I and most people were, you're young and stupid and you're absolutely making a fool out of yourself and embarrassing yourself.

    Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-08T09:57:13.148746+00:00
  17. Originally posted by Malice Not manlier than an extreme male brain.

    ctrl + f "systemizing", starting at the second result: http://journal.frontiersin.org/article/10.3389/fnhum.2010.00224/full



    Sound familiar, remind you of anything or anyone? And of course Aspies will, on average, display the strongest and most advanced hyper-systemizing ability. This is also strongly impacted by personality variables, which are at the end of this post, along with habits of the mind. The latter is something I've been identifying through introspection/reflection my entire life, then refining, altering, any behavior I see as flawed or suboptimal, producing a detrimental impact. My mind is extremely consistent and rule oriented, almost machine like, robotic. I ingrain things unusually quickly and consistently. So, for example, if I desire to alter a social behavior once this is identified and the course of action determined I will decide to make an effort to remain aware of this behavior, and my memory will be triggered every time it arises, is merely beginning to, or even before it actually occurs, merely being about to, so I can then change to what I determined was optimal, and through this extremely consistent process, with far more instances to repeat this cycle than the vast majority of people, the new habit will become ingrained and integrated, continually refined.

    Clearly I still possess human interests and emotions, have certain needs due to my biological vessel. For example, I view and greatly enjoy high quality anime. The basis for addressing this is because this extreme-systemizing cognitive style, which I didn't fully describe and is one aspect of how my mind functions, albeit a core one, only applies to thoughts (This is a broad category, it includes behavior such as analyzation, for example, that is engaged in through thought.) on subjects that are not primarily for entertainment or insubstantial. Although those are what the vast majority of my thoughts are focused on when in at least a fairly healthy emotional-mental health-cognitive state.

    Something amusing I still recall was this post Lanny made:



    The second paragraph was somewhat endearing. Although, also depressing in a way. Like an incomplete man. I'm fully aware of what I lack and am missing out on. Almost as if I don't possess something critical, the human element. Or at least a real emotional connection to others, normal relationships. I've isolated myself to such an extreme extent. My worldview, there's so much complexity I can't convey why, but it also has a profound effect on how I perceive the world, how it "feels", my thoughts, mind, being the center of my conscious experience, practically what I exist in, placing so much more value on it than average. I'm simply far more effective by it, by what I've accepted as truth, discovered about the world/life/reality/existence. Then of course there's the immense fear I have of intimacy, which I've stated is my greatest fear, even more than death before this point; interpersonal relationships, people attempting to become or becoming close to me, even developing or experiencing certain emotions, such as caring for others, empathy, attachment, or love. Along with all that, and immense fear of being hurt, the emotional pain being far higher than normal due to various factors, being greatly amplified in part from the neurological differences of aspergers.

    Well, there's a dichotomy. Despite not experiencing or having experienced the emotions, the events, ultimately, I view things differently. Like relationships, experiences with people, are a multivitamin, something to maintain or improve health, functioning. Ultimately I believe that the lasting positive impact, primarily mediated neurologically and by the endocrine system, by their modulation, is what truly, only, matters, not fleeting insubstantial pleasures that teach nothing I value. Then again, of course interpersonal relationships and the skills you develop, for the vast majority of people and their lifestyle, are an enormously important and beneficial part of life for most, a necessity. Countless examples of this, but, it truly isn't particularly valuable to me.

    Maximizing happiness isn't my goal. Happiness is only necessary for optimal biological function. There are bound to be strong diminishing returns to higher levels, to attempting to increase your average or baseline level of happiness, when factoring in the costs. Good enough to be optimal, to best allow me to achieve my higher goals, is the true/fundamental objective. It's related to Buddhism, renunciation. I genuinely stopped feeling the emotion of desiring happiness and became happier as a result. Not fully, with it never arising, behavior perfectly consistent with this belief and aim, of course.

    People often make the criticism of Buddhism and desire by stating they believe they need desire to achieve, but this is a misconception. I actually came to understand independently, without reading relevant material on Buddhism, just a basic understanding of this concept, possessing the prerequisites required to attain this, and then coming to an understanding through the hyper-systemizing cognitive style. This stems from this, which leads to that, connected to this. I described my cognitive style elsewhere. It's about the emotion of desire. Being discontent with your current situation because you desire something different, better. Feeling this emotion causes suffering and has no benefit. You can rationally recognize what is detrimental of your life and let go of the emotion. The original meaning, in the Buddha's language at the time, of "suffering" can actually be translated as uneasiness, or restlessness. At least this is crucial aspect of the concept. It's exactly what I'm attempting to demonstrate. So, perceive without "judgement", ascribing emotional values, categorization, to these matters. Let go of the suffering. See the path to the destination, then move toward it without pain of what you currently lack or due to aspects of the journey*

    *Difficulty, exertion, time required, costs, sacrifices, pain. As before, let go of judgements, don't dwell on them and develop, elicit, negative emotions, simply perceive and understand rationally. These negative emotions, thoughts, help nothing, improve nothing, they only perpetuate the suffering, cause/increase difficulty, negatively affect you in general.

    Do you understand now how to act, move forward (along the path), without the emotion of desire? This is what was truly meant. It's a process that takes time, is affected by a wide variety of factors, that you utilize various techniques for, knowledge and techniques that improve your development, accelerate it.

    Self-destructiveness has been a very strong factor in my life, but I rarely dwell on it, and it isn't something that I see as an integral part of my being, who I am, consider irremediable.

    As for why it was such a strong factor, well, I've had, and still possess, a wide variety of severe mental illnesses. I had a severe mental breakdown, with multiple negative developments during it, and was depressed near the maximum level for 3 years, suicidal, ruminating on it constantly, hourly without reprieve, with many symptom, ailments, exacerbating. I also hadn't fully developed as a person, cognitively, I didn't have the same knowledge and understanding I do now, beliefs, habits of the mind, other traits I've altered. I'm alive and am attempting the path to recovery now, though.



    I know, right? I mean, think about how much time and effort it takes to develop relationships. On that note, even Lanny admitted the following. Oh, fuck it, nevermind. For some reason I can't find the post. At least I don't want to keep trying, it really stopped being worth the time after, like, 5 minutes, probably. But he basically said romantic relationships have been a massive time sink that amount to nothing for him. Well, not that he believes they're worthless. I also remember him adding something at the end along the lines of "women are pretty gay, tbqh".

    Not merely time spent IRL, in physical proximity, even through texting, phone calls, social media (facebook), and in their own mind, their thoughts, others simply consume so much of their time, so many resources. In their own minds, utilizing various aspects of their cognition directed toward others, such insubstantial and transient subjects; this could be toward far more important matters. The cumulative amount of time saved is incredible.

    I mean, if I had social relationships like a normie how on earth would I have enough time to pursue my vast array of interests, which are continually developing? I'm constantly discovering novel matters that I desire to ascertain, learn and analyze, and properly/fully integrate into my mind. Analysis of not simply the specific information, but how it functions in conjunction with and affects, the implications, that can be made for anything relevant and salient in my prodigious autismal data banks.

    God I have severe OCD. When something captures my interest I just have to keep reading reading reading, utilize my exceptional data finding abilities/skills to locate what I desire, I obsess over it to some extent. I mean, fortunately it isn't to the point where I can't stop thinking about it, I don't lie awake at night with racing thoughts about the subject, feeling unable to fall asleep until I achieve some goal, or with an urge to get up and read more, do something related to it, and it isn't all I read about during that period.

    Eh, it's normal for some people to do this to some extent at least, think of students, researchers, people who have major projects/goals in mind, hobbies or special interests, especially academics, at least if they aren't lazy and are productive, haven't decided to kick back when they receive tenure. Of course, outside of researchers and academics, although they are strongly influenced by external forces as opposed to purely being driven*

    *No, wait, this isn't even possible. We're all affected by the external. At the very least for me it's in a very different manner, what influences the average person generally either doesn't influence me or it does so to a far lower, commonly abnormally low, extent.

    by their own motives separate from their careers and the perceptions of others, their judgements. Maximized cognitive/psychological independence. Following your personal interests outside of that, outside of conventional and common paradigms, institutions.



    I remember scoring, and of course I researched and chose a valid and optimal test, giving answers as realistic as possible, 100% thinking, 100% introversion, and 0% agreeableness. My openness score would likely be extremely high, matters generally determined on a purely rational basis (Yes, my mental illness, severe dysfunction, certainly does strongly impact my actions and has indeed greatly interfered with adherence to rationality). I was genuinely suicidal for 3 years and progressively deteriorating for extended periods, some symptoms progressively worsening the entire time.). Conscientiousness would likely be very low as well, similar to you. IIRC neuroticism may have been around mid range, somewhat above it.

    Post last edited by Malice at 2017-07-08T05:41:41.406851+00:00

    Super Didn't Read 2 Turbo
  18. Originally posted by Malice Summary: An argument for Captain Falcon's jealousy of my cognitive abilities, particularly the hyper-memory aspect of Asperger's (not all possess it, to be clear), and the psychological underpinnings, what leads to his along with me reprimanding, insulting, mocking, and belittling him. Showcasing his inferiority. His behavior.

    -What follows is optional, beginning with the Method of Loci and the thought that I have never bothered to any learn memorization strategies/techniques, a description of how advanced my visualization ability is, and how this cognitive fidelity, the accuracy and level of detail with which I can reproduce a path, simple from having passively, as opposed to intentionally and actively, stored this information, visualization skills, particularly of this manner, being pivotal for the Method of Loci, your affinity for it, the strength of the effect/benefits you gain from utilizing it, your potential. How I haven't unlocked the full prowess of my ability/skills and my memory could be taken even further with training, developing the habit, ingraining and integrating it. Who knows what the limits of my memory may be, particularly with how effective the Method of Loci is for the average person who properly learns and utilizes it, multiple aspects of myself causing my natural affinity to it, the benefits I would receive, and my potential, to be far higher.

    I wonder if this is in reality the primary source of your drive, regardless of you're consciously aware of it, to insult my intelligence, cognitive abilities. As if I'm merely regurgitating information (what you likely refer to as "autism" being mistaken for intelligence) with no understanding of what I'm writing.*

    *Oh yes, the vast amount of extensive posts I've made, you having admitted that you don't even read 99% of my posts and simply skip them. How in the fuck are you going to accurately gauge that, then? A simple definition for psychometric intelligence is "the ability to deal with complexity". A truly intelligent person would realize that if you're only reading 1% of my posts (Of course your estimate may be purposefully hyperbolous or simply inaccurate), likely the shortest and least substantial posts I write, it would be utterly idiotic to base your perceptions and judgements on your limited perception.

    I'm just slapping away at the keyboard and somehow the illusion of coherence is produced. Akin to a thousand monkeys typing on a thousand typewriters, who will soon produce the greatest novel known to mankind. Hurr durr, I have the autis*m virus, I'm mentally retarded and can't genuinely understand anything. Falco is such a genius in the field of autism specific neuroscience that he's discovered new symptoms, deficiencies and limitations, every single person on the spectrum has and is incapable of attenuating, let alone fully remedying.

    Or perhaps I simply copy and paste everything, despite that google will not return anything for a strict word search of my posts. Must be because I'm just rehashing the arguments of articles substandard in quality of writing and content which I just googled and read. Copying what someone else wrote and allowing them to think for me.

    You've consistently lied, made repeated posts, about your alleged absurd wealth, success, and lifestyle. You might claim you're trolling, but how are we supposed to understand who you truly are, develop an accurate view and gauge of you? Along with that you bring down others who attempt to demonstrate any pride, what you may (mis)perceive as pride, or above-standard ability. It's so consistent, you've been a member of this community for such prolonged spans of time, that these aspects of your personality are clea. You have a strong drive and desire to dominate others online, to feel superior to them, elite.

    Essentially, from the excerpt I quoted, it's clear that my autis*m/aspie power of hypermemory is one key aspect/trait that may evoke your virulence because it reminds you of your limitations, your inferiority and inadequacy, flaws, in certain respects. You can't stand it.

    Random note, in part to myself: I just had the thought that I never bothered learning any memorization techniques. If I were to learn the Method of Loci, whose efficacy will be augmented by the incredible neurologically mediated visual ability inherent to a large percentage of individuals with aspergers, I could take this ability to the next level. I already had a natural propensity to ace tests. I remember sometimes I would literally almost never pay attention in class, either lost in thought or reading independently, didn't do any homework or assigned reading, and somehow I would still manage to receive the highest score in a class. This is only an anecdote from school environments, of course nearly everyone here has noticed the hyper-memory.

    To give an example of my visualization ability. Well, I can easily conjure up detailed images of scenarios, even complex ones, of course with considerable movement, changing of the immediate environment. This is a basic question to identify people with poor or no ability. Past that, I can picture "myself", well, really just picturing something in my mind's eye almost as if I was a discarnate entity, just pure perception, although with my normal field of visual perception (I'm referring to the field of view, I am able to easily visualize from multiple perspectives, such as an aerial viewpoint.). For example, I can go through my entire cluttered apartment and know where everything important is, other than items under or partially buried in small piles of paper and other bits I should really throw away, what's behind every door, that is, in every cabinet, in the refrigerator, other containers, etc., move between vantage points either in a fluid or instantaneous manner, etc. Produce a detailed recreation which is allowed by various neurological factors, such as the hypermemory aspect.

    The same is true for the walk from here to the train station, I can visualize moving along the path and accurately recall it. Not very minor details, things that are insignificant. The fidelity isn't to the point where I can count trees along the way, or numerous small concrete square like structures along the side of the sidewalk. I don't have that level of power. Well, I haven't tried, at least. All this was stored in my memory without deliberately attempting to, passively.

    Random somewhat related minor story that came to mind, not important: I remember that in high school a science teacher I had was this really chill black guy. Anyway, I only did enough work for a C, but managed to receive the highest score on the final due to autis*m power. Afterward there was a simple assignment where he told us to write what grade we thought we deserved and possibly why, and I was honest and chose C. Sometime afterward, I recall he was in the class with just one other adult he was having a conversation with he asked what grade I thought I received and I think I told him C, and he told me I got A, likely do to my answer and performance on the test. That was a sweet deal, getting to skip the majority of the work for the entire class and still receiving an A. Eh, really not important or a good example of my abnormal memory.

    Absolutely didn't read
  19. Originally posted by cerakote you dont have some kind of superpower, dude. the brain of a person with aspergers is pretty much equal to a normally developed brain in terms of function, in that your brain lacks in some areas and strives in others, vs the "baseline".

    despite your evident belief that your brain is "better", the average person with regular cognitive development functions well in ALL areas. autism is a disorder, not some kind of adaptation.

    its unfortunate that you were born with that deficiency, but it is what it is and you have to figure out a way to overcome it. leading a life of self imposed isolation isnt healthy, whether or not youre autistic. you wonder why you arent happy, but you resign yourself to living a life of watching anime to imitate some sort of social interaction, take countless drugs in attempy to find a "fixer", and make post after post of research and conjecture that is all centered around your clinging to the pipe dream that having aspergers syndrome somehow excuses or explains your lifestyle. you need to take a good look at yourself dude. you are very intelligent and are gifted, even with the mental handicap of aspergers. why dont you utilize that to do something greater than what you currently do day in and day out?

    Also didn't read but Lanny thanked it and judging from the first line, it mirrors my point about Malus thinking his aütism makes his pathetic existence justifiable, so I assume it is a good one

    Edit: and I thanked it.

    Post last edited by Captain Falcon at 2017-07-08T09:26:08.195829+00:00

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