Originally posted by Piles of Crack
You know it's a special occasion when I use a plunger to get all the clogged up body hair out of my shower drain
Heeheehee, the ritual preparation as part of the mating ritual, how cute. I'd love to be able to observe everything you do (prior to sex). Must be so nervous.
Originally posted by Malice
Heeheehee, the ritual preparation as part of the mating ritual, how cute. I'd love to be able to observe everything you do (prior to sex). Must be so nervous.
Malice, how's your voice? If me and my wife record a porno will you narrate it for us?
Originally posted by Malice
Heeheehee, the ritual preparation as part of the mating ritual, how cute. I'd love to be able to observe everything you do (prior to sex). Must be so nervous.
I'm more nervous about the fact that she isn't here after calling me and saying she was one state away five hours ago. I'm about to go get a bottle of whiskey and start chugging it, something is wrong, I'm hoping she just got really lost. I cant get a hold of her because she lost her phone.
Originally posted by Malice
Oh, she'll be fine. It's 2017, nearly everyone has a smartphone and could give her directions.
Don't start chugging whiskey, she could be planning on surprising you or something.
I definitely would have taken a good dose of benzos before meeting someone new. Can't handle it otherwise.
Telling me she's three hours away five hours ago with no means to contact her in the meantime isn't exactly a surprise and she knows that. Something bad happened.