Originally posted by mmQ
What if you know the goal isn't a "potential growth experience" like for example I've had a goal of deep cleaning my place and rearranging some furniture and I've had that goal for a few months but every time I even consider it I'm like "well shit I wanna play some video games or I wanna drink" or something else and so basically I just say I'll do it tomorrow or another day. Procrastinating.
The reason I say it won't be a growth experience is because I've done it before and it was just a.. A cleaning. I didn't GROW as a person I don't think. I wonder if there's a trick to convincing myself that I could grow from chores and tasks like that.
It's all about momentum as well. I wasn't cleaning a lot earlier, like fuck it, why not let dishes pile for 3 days and have a bunch of random shit splayed across the floor? I've been making it a point to keep my shit clean though because I realized it makes everything else easier. If you start letting shit like that slip, more shit you've been procrastinating on will slowly build up, and it will feel more overwhelming and harder to get going. Then one day you're waking up after a 4 day bender and your entire living space, life and mind is trashed and it takes a ton of effort and agony.
If I just keep up with the little things, the big things seem more accessible to take care of. It forces you to stop living in the future and having anxiety about what will happen, which is not productive at all, and makes you actually take action. It's hard to see how the small actions add up when you view them one at a time but if you just chill with the worry/anxiety and do what you need to do you'll be much better off.
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DH was a dating site, Datehookup. People signed up to find dates, mates, etc.; but once you found the forums, you were not there to date. The forums were fun at times, then they closed the site last May. We are a bunch of refugees, that found NIS to post on.
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Originally posted by vindicktive vinny
lanny likes looking at dicks.
I love observing the magnificence of an erect penis. A tower triumphant against the vaginizing forces of the world. Only a real beta would recoil at the supreme symbol of masculinity. Fuck off you feminized little bitch. I take in the beauty and power of the phallus, you cower under the weight of it's force, because you are submissive and weak. Yes, look away you emasculated thing from the sight of a MAN. Pussy bitch.
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These days I think not enough people have been taking the time out of their busy days to appreciate the complex yet delicate, but at the same time overwhelming sense of self hatred that is placed inside each and every one of us by our creator at the time of conception. This, to me, is a damned shame. We were are all unique, we were all given our own personalities, so that the hatred you have for yourself is a unique one. Unless you are some sort of well known or infamous person, not many people will ever get the chance to know you and dislike you. And for most people that are not total assholes, probably only a few people will ever hate them.
You get to spend your whole life with yourself, and nobody knows yourself like yourself. Think about it. What do families do over time? The couples eventually grow somewhat apart while keeping each other occupied just enough so that they are not crushed by loneliness. The children eventually move away. The more time you spend around your family, the more you hate them, and the more you want to get away from them. But you are stuck with yourself your whole life, you can't get away from yourself. You may find a few hours or even a few days relief in drugs or some other vice, but you will need to be there to deal with yourself when you come down.
There is no getting away from it, everyone gets to feel it and everyone's self hatred is unique and different. To get to know someone intimately is to know the things they hate about themselves. To be vulnerable is to allow others to see the parts of you you hate. The individuality and intensity of it and the desires it spurns are strange when you think about it.
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Grimace
motherfucker
[my enumerable hindi guideword]
I always loved crack. What I loved even more though, is dissolving a $10-$20 rock in about 20-30 units of white vinegar, and then injecting it directly into my neck via mirrored reflection in the bathroom and a belt around my neck. Haha. They way it would hit so fucking hard, instantaneous "tunnel vision" and an extreme vibration in your whole fucking head as your head completely numbs over and you feel that rush of euphoria that used to make me literally gasp. Hah, one time, the rush was so fucking strong, I dropped to my fucking knees and just LOVED every second of it. The hardcore rushing goes away about as fast as smoking it does, but it's much stronger and then you're left with the typical crack high as if you smoked it and then of course, the eventual come down and a desire for more.
Mmmmm....crack...
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Mewsik
African Astronaut
[diagonally photosensitise my summation]
Originally posted by gadzooks
I legit think you might be me.
That whole paragraph describes me to a T.
Shit, that's exactly how it goes.
How exactly does one go about finding that proverbial 'equal'? I don't think anyone ever does. It's a lifelong struggle.
I think the first step is to truly understand who and what you are. Being as whole as possible and to not look for someone else to make you whole, but rather to just enjoy the wholeness of each other (whatever that might be). Being equal simply means both being whole. Knowing yourself, your needs, you likes, your wants, your values, things you don't want or don't like or can not tolerate. Once you reach that point, your likely hood of attracting what you want and need will happen .. Trying to picture what that person looks like is counter productive .. People who are as whole as they can be (they can provide for themselves and their necessities) won't desire to manipulate or change or create another human being .. If you can find who YOU are and maintain that and continue to grow emotionally and mentally .. it will happen organically.
That old saying about 2 halves make a whole is the biggest bunch of bullshit ever.
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Why would you take meth if you know you want to sleep soon after?
My advice would be to know what amount generally keeps you up for what amount of time, and then use that to determine appropriate dosage in accordance with when you hope to sleep.
At the end of the day, you can't be using meth and saying whoahh what why can't I sleep why I am awake so long?? Lol. That's the fucking point.
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This past year I started experiencing sleep paralysis. I never knew it was a thing until the third time it happened I started to read into it
Anyway, since June I've been having them way too frequently. Usually 4 to 5 days out of the week. They have become pretty terrifying and i get anxious every night before I go to bed.
I guess I just wanted to know if anyone here experiences these and how they cope with them.
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The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
