I don’t watch stand up much anymore because people aren’t funny like they used to be with it …
But I can say the hardest I’ve ever laughed was during Eddie Murphy stand up..
But I’m goofy so maybe that’s why .. but he was doing these sound effects of his aunt Bunny falling down some stairs 😭
And it was going on foreverrr.. then after all the falling he’s like “ oh my shoe”!
So like wth she’s only about half way down or what .. I was crying..literally my stomach was hurting it had got painful and uncomfortable like when someone force tickles you and won’t stop …
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just drove home from the bar with my coworker. We get to in intersection and theres a dude with his arms out like trying to get hit by my car and i start filming bc 1) ineed to cover my ass and 2) i just found it entertaining. I start honking n roll down the window n im like BRO YOU GOTTA GET OUT OF THE STREET. Then while im filming im like……”Does this dude have cerebral palsy.”
Yes. yes he does.
i get out of my car to try to get him to get from in front of my car and i realize oh shit this dude is mad disabled n covered in scabs. I try to tell him hes gonna get hit by a car and i want him ti be safe and he wants crying in Walt, Jr voice I HOPE THEY KILL ME ITD BE BETTER THAN THIS I JUST WANT TO GO HOME.
In my head im like nigga im 8 whiskeys 2 beers and 2 pancake shots deep and if i had to walk a straight line toe to toe right now you and i would prolly score the same. Long story short some other guy stopped behind us and relented to drive the dude home and i gave guy some gas money but the real tragedy was the dude harshed by buzz but my coworker and i discussed how we nasically saved this dudes life so i cracked a canned margarita and put on some appropriate music for the ride home and henstarted crying laughing
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I just got off the horn with psychomanthis. He was literally fucking a toddler and it was a very weird conversation what with his heavy breathing and not answering any of my questions but nonetheless it happened and it is what is is IT IS WHAT IT IS IT IS
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