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Aldra despises more than a few DH posters...

  1. #41
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by mmQ I have not done an open mic night and can easily admit that my confidence levels right now would not allow it. Maybe if I had the proper amount of Xanax or something but fun fact- I've never used it so I wouldn't even know. The only drug I've ever used to make me less anxious is alcohol and it absolutely does the trick but after I reaxh my magic point I generally just act retarded.

    wanna try a podcast?
  2. #42
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Just imagine everyone sitting in their underwear.

    That's the go-to line from people that have never spoken on stage before. Most of the time the audience is dimmed out anyway so you can't even see them, so that's really not the point behind stage fright. It's like what sudo said, just getting up there and getting over it, taking your lumps and your shame until you realize it doesn't matter.

    I mean if you genuinely suck, you'll know after a few tries, and you can proceed accordingly, but if it's just nerves, you'll also know, and can proceed accordingly.
  3. #43
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Sudo Yea that's like karaoke, you force people to go up by putting them on the spot, you just need the right prodding. Hopefully one of your friends ropes you into doing it because you will reach a new plateau of confidence and hilarity.

    I have a good friend who managed to bullshit his way onto giving a proposal to city council about a profitable environmental project he was trying to spearhead. He's an alcoholic but didn't want to drink before going so he took a bunch of Xanax and I remember watching the feed that was posted online of his 40 minute proposal and wondering how anyone couldn't tell he was high. He was speaking super slowly and slurring some words and since the camera was focused only on him, whenever someone else would talk he would exhale and his head would lean forward like he was nodding out. He would have got the project too but he messed up the timeline. I have another friend who did a presentation and got a grand when he was on some benzos and Molly too but he's a bullshit artist.

    Anyways, I'm going to send you some videos of me doing stand up for you to critique. It's actually me ripping off norm Macdonalds "me doing stand up" completely tastelessly. RIP. He would be proud of you for trying

    Norm went through lots of phases too. He has his drinking years and theres that footage of him playing poker and he was clearly drunk and it just felt different he didn't really seem like himself (obviously) and then there were other times on certain latenight appearances when you could tell he was on xannys or something. Even the best of the best still get nervous which makes me feel better but it's always interesting how so many comedians have stage fright and anxiety but yet still choose to be comedians. It's... Idk... Endearing? Adorable? Idk.

    I think I'd do way better in a Tim and Eric style where I had a sidekick to be retarded alongside with to relieve the pressure from doing it solo, but that's neither here nor there.

    I'm gonna do a Job Lovitz and wait til I'm in my mid 50s to start my stand up career and just be absolutely terrible at it
  4. #44
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by aldra wanna try a podcast?

    Right now? Lol no.
  5. #45
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by mmQ That's the go-to line from people that have never spoken on stage before. Most of the time the audience is dimmed out anyway so you can't even see them, so that's really not the point behind stage fright. It's like what sudo said, just getting up there and getting over it, taking your lumps and your shame until you realize it doesn't matter.

    I mean if you genuinely suck, you'll know after a few tries, and you can proceed accordingly, but if it's just nerves, you'll also know, and can proceed accordingly.

    I saw an interview with Robin Williams where he talked about how early in his career he would consistently bomb and imagining him free associating bombs is really funny to me. He seems like a much better person than stand up comedian, just like Josephine Rogan. There I just named 2 famous people you are funnier than
  6. #46
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Lol if I could just be Robin Williams level of manic I would absolutely do stand up and I'd probably do 6-hour sets and just keep going not even realizing the club had closed hours ago and it was completely empty.

    When I look at my Facebook memories from 8 years ago I have to keep from cringing my butthole inside out from how ridiculous some of my posts were like if I hadn't known better I would've thought for sure I was on crack and meth 24 hours a day, but also I miss it because I really just DGAF and that's kinda what I've always YEARNED for. I YEARN.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  7. #47
    Wariat Marine/Preteen Biologist
    im pretty manic depressive.
  8. #48
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I wish some of you really would do a podcast so I could listen to it and smile and then maybe be a guest one day but I usually can't think of anything to talk about without being prompted
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  9. #49
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by mmQ Right now? Lol no.

    no not right now

    falco suggested it a while ago
  10. #50
    5 alt dra funds the kikes iwtih his hebrew jedi banker kniowledg
    e if you can prove me wrong id love to 22$$$$$$$ u niggert
  11. #51
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by aldra no not right now

    falco suggested it a while ago

    Oh ok, well then yes.
  12. #52
    WellHung Black Hole
    Sigma Alp^ha Epsilon
  13. #53
    listen up, kike L
  14. #54
    KIKE L
  15. #55
    Originally posted by mmQ That's the go-to line from people that have never spoken on stage before. Most of the time the audience is dimmed out anyway so you can't even see them, so that's really not the point behind stage fright. It's like what sudo said, just getting up there and getting over it, taking your lumps and your shame until you realize it doesn't matter.

    I mean if you genuinely suck, you'll know after a few tries, and you can proceed accordingly, but if it's just nerves, you'll also know, and can proceed accordingly.

    Another way is to keep reminding yourself they all wipe their bums, too.
  16. #56
    Originally posted by mmQ Right now? Lol no.

    Let's do it. It'd be so much dead air
  17. #57
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Another way is to keep reminding yourself they all wipe their bums, too.

    Yes another way is as soon as you get on stage to grab the mic and tell them that you'll individually rape each and every one of them and one of their closest family members after the show if they don't laugh or clap at the correct spots.
  18. #58
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by General Butt.Naked Let's do it. It'd be so much dead air

    That's actually probably better for me since I don't like uncomfortable silences and it would force me to talk about whatever the hell I could think of and when I'm forced to think of shit to talk about my mind goes to some weird places which might actually end up making for some funny or interesting conversation like we could talk for an hour about what I was wondering yesterday what it would be like to only have half a butt.
  19. #59
    cigreting Dark Matter
    Originally posted by Sudo I don't normally do this but I'm diagnosing you with autism over the internet. There is no other excuse for this post. Take 2 .45s to the head and call me in the mourning

    wats mourning
  20. #60
    stl1 Cum Lickin' Fagit
    Originally posted by cigreting Old man spicy for once… calm down you might have a heart attack




    BITE ME, BITCH!

    How you like dem apples?
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