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The Retarded Thread: Get off that bus edition

  1. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by Tyrant Prove it

    You are captain falcon, a notorious exaggerator/liar/attention starved faggot who is meek, docile, effeminate and brown
  2. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Here's an actu true story that just happened to me:

    I got a friend request from some bitch whos location said a town about an hour and a half away, she messaged me and I accused her of bein a scammer because I didn't kno her, then she kept messaging me all day then started talking dirty and tried to video chat and I accepted then closed my screen and the girl looked semi legit although kinda choppy video quality. Anyway she was doing ho shit and asked for a dickpick so I sent, then she asked for my number so I gave the number of a burner I had, then a copy and pasted message came thru trying to blackmail me with a lone picture of my girthy cock so I blocked them, then they messaged the burner phone so I took another picture of my cock and sent it to them, then they sent weird messages telling me to "calm down and answer their questions" so I sent them another picture of my cock, which was less solid by now. Then I blocked them from that phone and I haven't heard anything since.

    Tbh I kinda knew it was a scam for a Lotta reasons but I was bored and like sending people dickpics. I also am a bit of an attention whore sometimes and I had a boring day so I'm just glad someone took an interest in pictures of my penis
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  3. Nile bump
    Originally posted by Tyrant You should kick his ass.

    That was my fault. Dude, for reasons (??) I had a torch lit next to me and passed out, he put a blanket on me that caught fire and then we fought when I came too.

    I don't remember any of this. There was a reason I told them to keep an eye on me cuz I was super fucked up and out of it. This guy is just a dumbass about things sometimes. So am I.

    I beat him in our scuffle. I'm glad I didn't blind my friend that would have been a bit much. But seriously he gets retarded when drinking, but I needed help not a fucking childish argument.
  4. Nile bump
    Originally posted by Sudo Here's an actu true story that just happened to me:

    I got a friend request from some bitch whos location said a town about an hour and a half away, she messaged me and I accused her of bein a scammer because I didn't kno her, then she kept messaging me all day then started talking dirty and tried to video chat and I accepted then closed my screen and the girl looked semi legit although kinda choppy video quality. Anyway she was doing ho shit and asked for a dickpick so I sent, then she asked for my number so I gave the number of a burner I had, then a copy and pasted message came thru trying to blackmail me with a lone picture of my girthy cock so I blocked them, then they messaged the burner phone so I took another picture of my cock and sent it to them, then they sent weird messages telling me to "calm down and answer their questions" so I sent them another picture of my cock, which was less solid by now. Then I blocked them from that phone and I haven't heard anything since.

    Tbh I kinda knew it was a scam for a Lotta reasons but I was bored and like sending people dickpics. I also am a bit of an attention whore sometimes and I had a boring day so I'm just glad someone took an interest in pictures of my penis

    I was giving rides to some hoe once, got her name, where she was from and her her wanted status.

    I got a fishing text for an e-transfer(she kept asking if I could accept them), from an area code just next to the city she fled from.

    I sent her an article of her arrest and told her she shouldn't fuck around with the person who knows where you're hiding. They freaked out lol.

    Fuckers couldn't just pay me a pittance and keep it on the level.
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  5. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by Nile I was giving rides to some hoe once, got her, where she was from and her name+her wanted status.

    I got a fishing text for an e-transfer(she kept asking if I could accept them), from an area code just next to the city she fled from.

    I sent her an article of her arrest and told her she shouldn't fuck around with the person who knows where you're hiding. They freaked out lol.

    Fuckers couldn't just pay me a pittance and keep it on the level.

    This horrible chinless ho I fucked before had a brother who told me about doing that "can u accept etrabsfer" scam before, then a few years later he messages me asking thr same thing, then a month after that his name popped up for doing a home invasion for a TV.

    THE STRUGGLE IS REAL

    REAL SLIMEY
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  6. Solstice Naturally Camouflaged
    Hey can you do a three way call to jail for me?
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  7. Tyrant African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sudo You are captain falcon, a notorious exaggerator/liar/attention starved faggot who is meek, docile, effeminate and brown

    Substituting further baseless allegations for evidence, like a bitch.
  8. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by Solstice Hey can you do a three way call to jail for me?

    "Hey baby when I get out we're gonna get married and settle down and be a power couple and raise a family and ima go to work everyday and stop injecting cat litter so that's why if you go out on Friday night or miss one of my phone calls I'm gonna kill you and your mother too...is that kevin in the background right now?"





    Originally posted by Tyrant Substituting further baseless allegations for evidence, like a bitch.

    Are you denying that you are captain falcon?
  9. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    torrez is shutting down in an orderly way without doing a massive exit scam

    amazing
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  10. Tyrant African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sudo Are you denying that you are captain falcon?

    Are you denying that you are literate?
  11. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    fucking israel, of course they waited until the Christmas holidays to kick shit off

    AA artillery firing off at Bushehr nuclear facility
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  12. Quick Mix Ready Dark Matter [jealously defalcate my upanishad]
    Originally posted by aldra fucking israel, of course they waited until the Christmas holidays to kick shit off

    AA artillery firing off at Bushehr nuclear facility

    wait what?

    Is it happening now?
  13. Donald Trump Black Hole
    It was just an exercise looks like.
  14. Nile bump
    Holy fuck I'm becoming one with the Chilis.





    I had like 1/3rd of a mickey of Smirnoff, thew some Chilis in there and well it's like drinking liquid fire. It's coming out of my pores between my fingertips.

    COCK BRAND.
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  15. Tyrant African Astronaut
    What if u changed ur legal name to Johnny Chiliconga?
  16. Nile bump
    Well, I'd need to buy like a suit, a chili suit. I'd walk around and bearmace people.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. Bradley Black Hole
    Originally posted by Tyrant He was staring at me smoking a joint and I asked him what he was looking at and he said "nothing, sorry" so I walked over and he got up, he was actually taller than me but he was an old bald white guy and I kept walking towards him so he looked startled and started backing up and fell over his patio table and he started getting up but I punched him in the chest and put him back through the table. He froze and I stared him down until he dropped his eyes and started staring at his chest. Then I walked back to where I was smoking and finished my joint.

    So you're doing drugs and your neighbor is sitting down, you walk into guys face and he falls out of the chair? Then you punch him through the table

    And then he is back up and now dropping his eyes

    WhyY u come on the internet and just lie to people
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  18. Bradley Black Hole
    Originally posted by Nile Holy fuck I'm becoming one with the Chilis.





    I had like 1/3rd of a mickey of Smirnoff, thew some Chilis in there and well it's like drinking liquid fire. It's coming out of my pores between my fingertips.

    COCK BRAND.

    Do you eat them raw or only infused and cooked
  19. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Nile Holy fuck I'm becoming one with the Chilis.





    I had like 1/3rd of a mickey of Smirnoff, thew some Chilis in there and well it's like drinking liquid fire. It's coming out of my pores between my fingertips.

    COCK BRAND.

    have you had a flatliner before? a shot of white sambucca, tequila and Tabasco sauce

    it's repulsive, but a fun way to black out
  20. Tyrant African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Bradley So you're doing drugs and your neighbor is sitting down, you walk into guys face and he falls out of the chair? Then you punch him through the table

    And then he is back up and now dropping his eyes

    WhyY u come on the internet and just lie to people

    It's only unbelievable to you because you're a pussy who would never threaten someone, probably because you love the police.

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